Disclamor: I don't own Sauron or any of the other people, there
Tolkien's.
This is my first LOTR fic. Enjoy.
Sauron's Diary
Entry 1
I hate my life. Why? 1: I'm over 6000, I'm older than the Ents. I mean I'm proud I'm old but I would like to go back home. 2: Everyone thinks my life is a walk through the flowers. It's not. Five days after my 3000th birthday I was over thrown. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAURON!!!!!! By the Valar that sucked.
I hate the shrink who suggested I keep this thing, in fact next time I see him I'm gonna kill him. That sounds fun.
I'm waging another war against the free people of Middle-Earth. Not my hottest idea yet. I lost the witch king. That was a week before my 6073rd birthday. The first thing I said was 'who spiked the punch'. Damn Nazgul always have to get each other drunk. I was pretty far gone by then so I don't remember what they did to the first one to fall asleep or pass out.
Damn Orc army, and I thought nine undead warriors where bad. I need to take my medication. Shrink says it'll make me happy. Fat chance.
Entry 2
I hate Hobbits. Note to self: Hobbits are worse than orcs, an army of orcs. The eight weren't doing there job and the hobbits got past.
My Messenger decided he wanted to be like the orcs. He got a mohawk. *bangs head against desk* Think Happy. Think Happy.
Entry 3
Ring got dropped into mountain today and I almost died! Fun, fun, fun. Nazgul #5 found me on the ground cursing my head off. Lost all dignity there. He kept asking me if I was all right and if I needed any help. I almost killed him there but thanked him instead. And you wonder why I'm a shadow. My beautiful tower collapsed today. I kinda went numb after that. I decided I was gonna rebuild it. I don't care what Gandalf does to try and stop me.
Found a way to get WKOA back.
Entry 4
I rebuilt my tower.
Then Gandalf came and told me to sod of cause I was sposed to be dead. I sent my pet balrog on him. I never knew he could run that fast.
Entry 5
Messenger finally shaved his head. Since I 'can't' hold on to anything Saruman tried to lead the Nazgul. I sent Bob(the balrog) on him. He can run fast to.
Entry 6
Got around to killing the shrink. The Nazgul where keeping all sharp things away from me so I used his books. Didn't know throwing books around could be so relieving. Also snuck up behind the WKOA and beat him over the head with a book. He gave me all my weapons back. All of them. Including my mace. He had that one from a long time ago.
I stopped taking the medication. It was making me see triple. 27 Nazgul are not fun to look at.
~*~*~*~
WKOA= Witch King of Angmar
Don't you fell sorry for Sauron now?
This is my first LOTR fic. Enjoy.
Sauron's Diary
Entry 1
I hate my life. Why? 1: I'm over 6000, I'm older than the Ents. I mean I'm proud I'm old but I would like to go back home. 2: Everyone thinks my life is a walk through the flowers. It's not. Five days after my 3000th birthday I was over thrown. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAURON!!!!!! By the Valar that sucked.
I hate the shrink who suggested I keep this thing, in fact next time I see him I'm gonna kill him. That sounds fun.
I'm waging another war against the free people of Middle-Earth. Not my hottest idea yet. I lost the witch king. That was a week before my 6073rd birthday. The first thing I said was 'who spiked the punch'. Damn Nazgul always have to get each other drunk. I was pretty far gone by then so I don't remember what they did to the first one to fall asleep or pass out.
Damn Orc army, and I thought nine undead warriors where bad. I need to take my medication. Shrink says it'll make me happy. Fat chance.
Entry 2
I hate Hobbits. Note to self: Hobbits are worse than orcs, an army of orcs. The eight weren't doing there job and the hobbits got past.
My Messenger decided he wanted to be like the orcs. He got a mohawk. *bangs head against desk* Think Happy. Think Happy.
Entry 3
Ring got dropped into mountain today and I almost died! Fun, fun, fun. Nazgul #5 found me on the ground cursing my head off. Lost all dignity there. He kept asking me if I was all right and if I needed any help. I almost killed him there but thanked him instead. And you wonder why I'm a shadow. My beautiful tower collapsed today. I kinda went numb after that. I decided I was gonna rebuild it. I don't care what Gandalf does to try and stop me.
Found a way to get WKOA back.
Entry 4
I rebuilt my tower.
Then Gandalf came and told me to sod of cause I was sposed to be dead. I sent my pet balrog on him. I never knew he could run that fast.
Entry 5
Messenger finally shaved his head. Since I 'can't' hold on to anything Saruman tried to lead the Nazgul. I sent Bob(the balrog) on him. He can run fast to.
Entry 6
Got around to killing the shrink. The Nazgul where keeping all sharp things away from me so I used his books. Didn't know throwing books around could be so relieving. Also snuck up behind the WKOA and beat him over the head with a book. He gave me all my weapons back. All of them. Including my mace. He had that one from a long time ago.
I stopped taking the medication. It was making me see triple. 27 Nazgul are not fun to look at.
~*~*~*~
WKOA= Witch King of Angmar
Don't you fell sorry for Sauron now?