Title: Blue Lights
Author: Spirix
Genre: Comedy
Rating: T for… well there are a couple swear words. I don't want to scar anyone for life :D
Pairing: Renji / Ichigo
Spoilers: None
Summary: On the hunt for blue Christmas lights.
Word Count: I dunno…
Disclaimer: As much as I wish I do not own Bleach.
Dedication: I don't remember.
Blue Lights
"Where are we going?"
Renji wasn't at all impressed. They had just spent nearly an entire day making Ichigo's apartment more… Christmassy and now they were out in the cold, looking up at the 5th floor balcony from the street.
"Doncha think we need lights. It looks kinda weird being all bare and all."
Ichigo was tugging his red scarf on one side to make it more even while Renji glared at him.
"Weird? This holiday is weird! Why do we need lights, we don't hav'em the rest of the year."
"Come on Ren, its Christmas in a month. Get with the season. No let's go find some… BLUE lights. Yes I think blue would look nice. We have red and green…"
He continued talking to himself even as they got in the car. Renji sat in the passenger side and tried to warm his hands. They didn't have Christmas or snow in the soul society but he was beginning to think there was a good reason for that.
Back home they started unpacking the singular box of blue lights to drape on the railing. Renji was still glowering because it had taken Ichigo an hour to figure out whether or not he wanted LED or traditional bulbs. Apparently LED lasted longer and were brighter but at last Ichigo thought Renji first Christmas should be traditional. No one decided to mention that they were on sale.
"Renji I want you to arrange them. I will go down to the street and direct you."
Already his heart sank. It had taken all day because somewhere, somehow Ichigo had become a decoration perfectionist and it was driving the poor death god mad. The tree alone was the biggest head ache Renji had ever dealt with. It was a good thing he loved the damn strawberry because otherwise he would already be dead.
The reluctant red head plugged in the strand of blue lights and brought them to their little balcony that wasn't even big enough for two chairs. Gotta love the city. He arranged the lights in the pattern Ichigo explained to him as if he were a simple child. It was too bad that Renji also felt like one as Ichigo yelled out things to him from the street. This was getting out of hand.
They were back in one of the various stores returning the lights from earlier that evening. Renji liked them but Ichigo claimed that all the lights were not the same blue. Renji was just thankful Wal-Mart was open because he loath the idea of crawling into bed with Ichigo later on, knowing he would just lie there and rant about the lights and the flaws of mass production.
Going home with another brand of blue lights they tired again and failed. Ichigo wasn't happy with the lights' colour and Renji was just unhappy. They returned to the store and exchanged the light for a set of the final brand; the store only had three traditional brands.
These too failed.
"Maybe if I knew what you wanted I could help?"
Renji offered but Ichigo only growled about incompetent store chains and park sharply. They were at another store. This time Ichigo bought two boxes of the same brand explaining that one is bound to work, but neither did.
"Oh my god, can we give up now!?"
Renji was tired and want to go to bed. Just because all these stores were open until midnight didn't mean he wanted to be at this until then. There was hot chocolate at home with his name on it.
"I refuse to surrender to this… SCAM! I saw house with blue lights that were all the same colour and they had to buy them somewhere…"
At the next store Ichigo took one of every kind of traditional blue light box. There were 11 in total. Renji had given up on talking because every time he offer help or asked a question Ichigo would just go off onto a rant that would last minutes more than anyone cared to hear.
--Ten Stores Later--
It was getting late and Renji was starved. They had planned on putting up lights and then eating but that plan had long since died. Ichigo was obsessed with this light thing that according to a store clerk… 4 stores ago wasn't as big a deal as Ichigo was making it. Apparently you could have Christmas without lights, but Ichigo freak when Renji told him this.
"I am doing this for you, ya bastard! This is your first Christmas. Can you blame me for wanting it to be done right?"
Guilt and a thin layer of annoyance flooded Renji. He didn't want all this trouble on his account but the look on Ichigo's face made him just let him go. It seems this was very important to him and if was important to his lover it was important to him.
--Twenty-Seven Stores Later--
"I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE COLOURS ANYMORE!! JUST PICK SOMETHING AND LET'S GO HOME. FUCK!"
Renji was loosing it. There was no amount of love in this world or any other to allow this war of the lights to continue. It was well past what time he had planned to go to sleep yet there were still shepparding lights to and from various stores and checking them out on the railing.
Ichigo was getting pissy too. His lights just didn't seem to exist. Both of them sat in angered silence as they drove through a nice neighbourhood on their way home, again. IT was then Ichigo slammed the brakes with a yelled,
"There they are!!"
Renji grumbled as he removed his head from the headboard. Ichigo had once told him seatbelts saved lives, now he knew why. He looked to see Ichigo standing in front of a cute little home covered in only blue lights. They were really A LOT prettier than the ones they had been buying all evening.
Renji went up to the door and knocked, since Ichigo was too entranced by the watery glow they emitted. He forgot it was close to midnight but decided if he wasn't allowed to sleep, no one else would either. Lights came on in various rooms as a petite little blonde woman came to the door. One look at Renji and she closed it again with a squeak. It reopened to reveal a large bulging man that looked like he ate children for dinner.
Not at all intimidated by this pathetic attempt to scare him, Renji asked the question they should have asked in the start.
"Where did you get your lights?"
"Wha…?"
"Your Christmas lights, where did you get them?"
"I dunno wha yor talking about, go home."
Something snapped in Renji. He couldn't name what but he had had enough with all the damn lights and the idiots around them.
"Listen up, I want those fucking lights and I want them now. So you are either going to tell me where you bought them or I am going to rip them off your house and strangle you with them. Got it?!"
The little squeaking woman appeared from behind the man's massive bulk.
"Please sir, those lights aren't sold anymore. We bought them last year. The company that makes them went out of business I think."
Ichigo's heart sank. Renji had never seen him so happy and the so sad in the same day. Usually Ichigo was a casual happy guy, nothing extreme. He used to be a scowller but since they had become a couple he was less moody. Now for the first time Ichigo had been happy about something unimportant and it was taken away. It broke Renji's heart.
"Come on Ren, let's go home."
Ichigo put his ever familiar grumpy face and went over to the car and sat in the passenger side. Renji looked at him in the car, starring moodly out the opposite window.
"By any chance to you have an extra strand of lights? I am willing to buy them off you. Please?"
The two in the doorway exchanged glances.
"I'm sorry but we need them all. It's a complete set and if we gave you one then the house would be off balanced."
The little woman looked sad at this admission but at least she was being honest.
"I have 200 in my wallet. Would you sell me the whole set?"
Renji knew this was a lot of money to spend on lights, but if it would bring back the sparkle in his lover's eyes…
"Deal! I have been wanted to get icicle lights anyways."
The woman smile and took the bills before Renji changed his mind. In two swift motions Renji unplugged the lights and whipped them off the house. And some thought learning to use a whip like weapon had no place in the real world. He smiled at himself.
That night they lay close together. Ichigo lay on top of Renji, using his chest as a pillow. Renji was still awake. He wrapped his arms and around Ichigo, one hand in his orange hair. It was hard to sleep with so many lights on. Ichigo had insisted they put up the whole set in his excitement. The problem was that the railing only held on strand. They couldn't put any up in the living room because they would set off the tree lights and the kitchen was attached so that would be the same problem. Lights in the bathroom would be weird so the only other option was bearing down on Renji as he look at the blue ceiling.
There were over 15 strands of blue lights there looking back at him. The sacrifices made for love… sometimes it made Renji sick. Only sometimes though he though, rest his head against Ichigo's and breathing in the scent of his hair.
"Merry Christmas Ichigo."
END
Christmas is over, I know. But this actually happened to me and I wanted to share. I'm Renji in this story by the way. You have no idea what it's like to be dragged around looking for no existent lights. Well Happy New Year everyone!