I've lived on this earth long enough to start hating my extisance. Being stuck at 17 forever is something I hated with a passion, but being a vampire I hated more. When I try to kill myself back in the 1720's so I can be with my dad, Carlisle Cullen, again, I wanted to succeed at it but instead I woke up three days later to being this monster. Even though I hated what I was, I made the best of it and dealt with the fact I was going to live forever and there was nothing I could do about it. I went through this life trying to survive and hiding the fact I wasn't normal, I never would be again.

I use to be a happy; care free child who actually loved his life but when my father passed away that was when my life went downhill. My father, Carlisle, was my best friend. It was just the two of us because my mother passed away when I was 4 years old. He was the best father to me and he sacrificed a lot just so I could have a good life. He taught me so much and made sure I was always happy and well taken care of until the day me and my grandfather found out he was murdered doing a job for my grandfather and his friends. That's when I started to change and not really care for anyone or anything. All I wanted was my dad back in my life but I knew that wasn't ever going to happen. Even though it's been such a long time since his death, I'm still missing him and getting over it has never happened for me.

Just so I can get by in my life, I pretended to be a 15 year old boy who lost his family a few years ago just so I can be adopted into a family since the last thing I have anymore is money to help me live on my own. I wasn't the type of vampire everyone thinks I am. I did appear more human than the other vampires I have come across in my travels. I had my crystal blue eyes still that I got from my father, I was pale but not that much, my hair was a dirty blonde with a bunch of curls in it and along with my good looks I had the smile to match it all. I did have blood that I got from blood banks just so I didn't feed on humans. I ate regular human food and slept like a human did so being adopted into a family wasn't that hard for me since I passed for a 15 year old.

The family that adopted me didn't have any other children. They weren't able to have any but the way they were it was kind of good they didn't have any. At first when I was placed with them, they acted nice and caring and like they really wanted me but once the adoption papers were signed, they turned on me. They were abusive, physically and emotionally and made my life a living hell. I couldn't get out of the situation I was in since I had to play the role of being a normal human and I really didn't have any where else to go.

I can take the beatings my adopted father gives me whenever he wants to and whatever else they want to do to me but sometimes it's hard for me to push it the side and forget about it. To cope with it all, I resulted in cutting myself and it's been going on for 3 months already. At first it would just heal after I did it but after a while it stopped healing so fast and it would leave scars that I had to hide as good as I can especially when I went to school. I didn't need to become the freak of the school after I just started going there. I knew that self-harm wasn't the answer to everything but it made me feel better and forget the pain I'm actually feeling inside.

JJJJ

When my alarm clock goes off for the next morning, I turn around in my bed and groan when I shut it off. It was 7am and I had until 815am to get ready for school, the one place I hated going to but I had no choice but to go to keep up the human side of me. School wasn't too bad since some people did talk to me like Bella Swan and the Cullen family. I did think it was strange they had my birth last name but then again it can be a common last name now then it was years ago. I shrug off the thoughts of it and get myself ready for school.

"Jayden, you better get your ungrateful ass down here before your late!"

That is my adopted mother's way of a good morning for me. I roll my eyes and grab my bag and head downstairs before they both get mad with me. I go to the kitchen where my parents were and try to grab something to eat for my walk to school but my adopted dad smacks my hand away from the food I was trying to grab. I try to fake it hurt a little by rubbing my hand and making a pained face but it's not like it matters to them if I was hurt or if I was bleeding out on the kitchen floor.

"No one gave you permission to grab any of our food, little shit!"

"It's my food too, you know."

I mumbled under my breath while I walk past them but he heard me and grabs me by the hood and spins me around so I can face him. He slams his beer bottle in his hand and takes his fist and punches me in the side of my jaw which didn't hurt but I faked that it did.

"Don't you dare talk back to me you boy! You are damn lucky that we took you in and did everything we have done for you. If I was you I would be a little bit more grateful."

"I-I'm sorry."

"I don't care for your sorry. Get your ass to school. We won't take you if you're late."

I nod my head fast at him and run out of the house before he decided to do anything else. I decide to use my vampire speed to get to school on time before I was late. When I get there it was 10 minutes before the bell was going to ring. I see Bella and everyone else outside, hanging by their cars and even though I did try to avoid them, it never worked out that way for me. As I try to walk past them without them noticing me, they call my name and instead of me going over there, I decide to ignore them instead. I never do that but I wasn't really in the talking mood right now. I just keep walking and go inside the school, to my locker, to get ready for the day.