Disclaimer: I do not own Ranma ½. You should be thanking god that I don't.

Ok, so basically this is my oneshot about Ranma getting a job-at McDonalds! How bad can it be? You better believe very bad!

"No."

"Why not?" Asked Akane, her hands on her hips.

"Because I already have a job." Replied Ranma. "I'm a martial artist."

"Yes, but you need a job that can pay the FREAKING BILLS!" Yelled Akane, her patience fading. "Don't make me get my hammer!"

"But-."

"STOP QUESTIONING MY AUTHORITY AND GET YOUR ASS OUT THE DOOR!"

Ranma ran out the door before Akane grabbed her hammer.

"So why do you want this job?" Asked the manager in a bored voice.

Ranma had looked everywhere for a job and found one at McDonalds, so he was being interviewed.

"Because if I don't, Akane will give me death by hammer."

"Akane?"

"My…wife." Ranma forced out the last word.

"I see. Do you have any talents?"

"I can beat people up." Said Ranma.

"I see." Said the manager, writing this down on his clipboard. "Is there any reason I should hire you?"

" Because when Akane kills me for not getting a job, you go down with me!" Growled Ranma.

"Reason enough for me! You're hired!" Said the manager quickly, thrusting the uniform at Ranma. "Starting today, you will be our cashier."

"Great!" Exclaimed Ranma. But then he frowned. "Wait, how do you do that?"

After changing into his uniform, Ranma stood in front of the cash register, fake smile ready and waiting for his first customer.

Then he saw a big biker dude come in.

"Hello, sir. What would you like?" Said Ranma with as much fake cheeriness as he could muster.

"I WANT A HAPPY MEAL!" Bellowed the man. "WITH A GIRL'S TOY!"

"I'm,uh, sorry sir. You're too old for that." Said Ranma.

"GIVE ME MY HAPPY MEAL!" Yelled the man, jumping up and down and flailing his arms.

"Go be stupid somewhere else!" Yelled Ranma, officially pissed.

"You dare say that?" Yelled the man, cracking his knuckles. "I'll teach you respect, pip-squeak!"

Ten seconds later…..

"Well, He's in a coma, but he should be ok in a few days." Said the Nurse as she lifted the man onto the stretcher.

Ranma sighed and shuffled back to his cash register.

The first day hadn't gone so well.

'How the hell could this get any worse?' Thought Ranma.

Hell seemed to be favoring Ranma that day, because no sooner had he spoken, Ryoga and Mousse entered.

"I'm so-." Ryoga stopped talking as soon as he saw Ranma.

Mousse and Ryoga stared at Ranma.

"Well, they should be ok soon." Said the Nurse as she lifted Mousse and Ryoga onto a stretcher. "But this is an interesting case. This is the first time I've had someone's heart give out from laughing."

Ranma groaned.

That was his limit.

He shuffled out the door and walked back home.

He took a deep breath and knocked on his door.

Akane answered with a slight smile on her face. "Hello, Ranma. Did you keep a job this time?"

"Yeah!" Said Ranma, grinning. "I kept my job for five whole minutes!"

Akane smiled and Ranma thought he was forgiven.

At least, until he felt a hard, sharp pain on his head.

Wow.

He couldn't believe she had been serious about the hammer.

THE END