"Oh I Know, I Will Find You There."
Mystic25
Rating: PG
Summary: Coda to 8x23: "The Sacrifice" Spoilers from the episode.
Disclaimer: The show belongs to its fabulous creators and writers, and actors.
A/N: I can't really even function after such a spectacular, heart wrenching, amazing season finalie. I teared up so much towards the end. I could barely see the TV.
A/N #2: I dedicate this to the amazing acting from everyone around. And especially to Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles who broke my heart as Sam and Dean. The title is a lyric of: "Found" by Christel Alsos. It's why I cried when I wrote this.
xxxxxXxxxx
"There is never a time or place for true love. It happens accidentally, in a heartbeat, in a single flashing, throbbing moment."
~ Sarah Dessen, The Truth About Forever
xxxxxXxxxx
Fireflies have a short life, a brief moment where they burst onto the world, and glow like earthbound stars in a night blanketed by a drowsy summer warmth.
When Sam and Dean were little, they used to watch them fly. Tiny flecks of light glowing light that would hover over their heads and even get tangled in their hair, especially Sam's. The younger brother would laugh, even well into his 12th year. Because it was such a surreal phenomena, even with all the surreal phenomena they had already seen in their short lifetimes.
Falling stars had the same short life of fireflies. They were like a cluster of fireflies had decided to fly as far as they could go so that they pluck a star down from the sky to bring back with them. Because they wished for nothing more than to end their loneliness as the only thing on the earth that glowed in the darkness.
These stars were amazing, awe inspiring to look at. They streaked across the heavens, turning the night into morning for just that brief moment in time.
It had started to rain, the body of the black car slid the drops to the ground that was wet and muddled with leaves, and sticky from the dampened earth.
The night sky was awash with these lights, that left brilliant contrails in their wake. But they were echoed with shadows of burnt out wings. Angels falling by countless numbers, dropping to the earth at immeasurable speeds like landing bombs.
Watching them was unavoidable, it wasn't something one could voluntary look away from. Dean's eyes lit up from the flash that came each time one of those bodies hit the ground.
With each one Sam looked too, but with each impact, he jumped. His body weakened beyond human exhaustion, stretched down to the barest of sinews. His chest was burning like fire, pelted from rain that began to grow heavier as more and more angels collapsed in en mass around them.
His legs were numb under his body, and that feeling crept up both arms until it ended from his elbows down in a jagged pain like being submerged in freezing water. All the self sacrificing moment to complete the final Trial had broken away in the church when Dean had pulled him into his arms. And Sam forgot how to do anything but cling to the brother that had never really cast him aside; that had been imperfect and messed up and human, had always been just like him.
Sam moved a hand clumsily over to Dean, the rain drops turning the skin on his arm his to water, feeling for him in the dark.
And Dean stopped watching the falling angels, the collapsing of heaven right in front of his eyes. He turned to see his little brother reaching out for him, to not want to be alone.
Dean grabbed Sam's wrist, feeling the erratic pulse beat under his fingers, the quaking jerking his arm. He shifted his grasp to Sam's forearm, he heard a grunt from Sam, but he still pulled until Sam was lying against his side."You're okay little brother." He reached an arm around Sam's shoulders. "You're okay."
Sam felt his shaking intensify where his body was in contact with Dean's. "Thank you." It was part physical, but more metaphysical. A touch of something so raw, so needed that Sam could feel the ache down into his soul. Like he finally reached something he had never really lost, but had always wanted to be found.
The rain was relentless, and thunder rumbled a fierce growl under the cloak of blackness. Heaven, the world, had been turned upside on its axis. There were a thousand events that had been set in motion that may never be brought back.
But on the rain soaked grown, Dean gripped his little brother's shoulder tighter. He could deal with the world being backwards, even the things he couldn't even describe yet; because he chose this; because he chose Sam.
They had died for each other dozens of times, but they had never chosen to live for each other. The rain and a looming church were the only witness to the ultimate sacrifice that they would ever make for each other.
Sam's eyes squeezed shut and a shudder of breath shook out, his fingers closed tightly on the flesh of his brother.
Dean's hand rubbed the skin of Sam's shoulder over his soaked shirt, his voice carried above all the rain: "I know, Sammy." he leaned closer like the next part was the secret of brothers whispered and promised so long ago: "I've always known-"
The rain competed for the tears on the faces of the two men under the Impala as the storm continued and the angels fell from the sky.
xxxxxxXxxxxx
End.
Per Jared's Twitter, there was a family emergency that pulled him back home with his wife from a convention. My good thoughts to him and his family during their emergent time. I encourage you all to do the same. Not because he's famous, but because they're people.
~Mystic