Insomnia Strikes Back!
I do not own X-Men: Evolution characters having sanity slippage problems due to insomnia or sleepwalking problems. This came in my weird twisted mind after my fifth drink of Pepsi. Enjoy!
It was a bright, beautiful Monday night in the Xavier Institute, and everyone was sound asleep…
"UGGH! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" Jean's voice shrilled through the night sky
Erm, not quite every one. That said; let's see what Jean is up to, shall we?
"Ugh, for the love of Allah, do you have insomnia again?" Scott groaned groggily as Jean tried once more to self-hypnotize herself, but to no avail
"Well, excuse me for trying to entertain you by renting Gossip Girl on Redbox tonight, only because of your insane fetish over Blake Lively!" Jean snapped
"Hey, first off; it's not a fetish, it's a simple celeb crush. Second, the dang disc stopped during one of the episodes!" Scott added before making an about face and adding, "Wait a minute…"
"What? You want me to wait a lousy, stinking moment so you can just blab over and over about this silly thing? Have you gone crazy?" Jean hissed before then making second thoughts "Ok, stupid question."
"Yeah, you said it." Scott muttered under his breath before Jean grasped him by the shirt collar
"Care to repeat that crack, wise guy?" Jean snarled, as Scott could make out the foam dripping from her teeth
"I said the show was worth some credit." Scott replied sheepishly. Jean just rolled her eyes, let go of Scott's shirt collar and then, groaning, got up from the bed, and headed downstairs
"Hey, what the? Where do you think you're going? It's practically midnight, for God's sakes! Jean!" Scott hollered as his somnambulistic wife trudged down the stairs "If you want something done right around this nuthouse…" he muttered, heading over to Madame Hydra and Bobby's room
Scott opened the door, and bugged out to see Bobby loudly snoring, the twins sleeping peacefully and Madame Hydra snoring, clutching a stuffed animal in her arm.
This is a bad idea, Scott. Must resist. Scott warily thought as he nudged Madame Hydra's shoulder.
"Miss Hydra? Madame? Hey, wake up." Scott whispered faintly, rapidly nudging
"Grrr…" Madame Hydra grumbled before opening her eyes and then her eyes went wide upon seeing who she was staring at
"What the? Scott! What are you doing, you crazy hyena!" Madame Hydra quietly hissed, trying to swat Scott with her pillow as he kept dodging
"It's Jean! She's sleepwalking again!" Scott babbled as Madame Hydra then had her gloved hands around his throat
"If this is another of your crazy jokes, then so help me…" Madame Hydra snarled before a loud clattering sound echoed in the kitchen, followed by a faint, falsetto singing voice. A voice that belonged to a certain redhead
"Can you let go of my throat, please? It's suffocating me." Scott wheezed. Madame Hydra heaved in disgust, releasing Scott before both headed out the room
"One, just one little move or wisecrack out of your mouth, and I'll beat your head like a Moroccan bongo. Have I made myself very clear?" Madame Hydra hissed, her face leaning over Scott's face as he sheepishly laughed
"Have you ever considered acting? You'd be great in Rock of Ages." Scott whined meekly before squeaking as Madame Hydra grasped his throat, and both zinged down the stairs
Scott and Madame Hydra then slowly tiptoed toward the kitchen and gazed in awe as they found Jean slumped over the dining table, her head on a dinner plate with only a half-eaten bagel and a frosted slushie. Scott could make out Jean's snoring as her red hair blew faintly while she snored
"Well, that's just swell." Madame Hydra grunted sarcastically before noticing Scott was missing "What in tarnation? Scott! You get back here, you little jackal, or I'll mangle you into a…" She then found Scott snapping photos of the hung-over Jean on his iPhone. In disgust, Madame Hydra trudged over and swatted the phone from Scott's hand
"What was that for?" Scott asked sheepishly as Madame Hydra faced him eye-to-eye
"That? That was nothing. But this is!" Madame Hydra snarled, thwacking Scott up the head in one hand, grasping Jean's shirt collar in the next "Come on, you two crazies. I swear, next time, there'll be a curfew around here…" she grumbled, walking up the staircase, Scott giggling maniacally as they headed down the hallway
The next morning…
"Ugh… I just had the craziest dream last night." Jean blabbered, eating breakfast with Kitty and Lance at the table
"What was it?" Lance asked curiously. "No, no, no, you don't even want to know." Jean instantly replied
"What happened? What happened?" Lance babbled excitedly, jumping up and down. Jean rolled her eyes before dropping her defense
"OK! OK! Just quit jumping up and down like a banshee!" Jean hissed as Lance squatted on his chair, his eyes widely open
Jean took a deep breath before starting "Well… I dreamed I was walking on water, before I then entered what I thought was some ice castle. It had all these large shelves of food and drinks. So then I ate what I thought was a piece of some Swiss cheese, then I was on an opera stage in Italy, where they performed Cyrano de Bergenac"
"An ice castle filled with food…and then an opera stage? That's ridiculous!" Lance laughed uproariously before stopping as he noticed the fiery look Jean gave him
"Thank you. Now after that, I was then on some large raft, where I was sailing with a couple of merchants. The odd thing is, they almost sounded a lot like Scott and Madame Hydra." Jean then continued with a curious, far-off look on her face as Kitty and Lance listened in confusion
"…What?" Lance replied flatly before Kitty hardly nudged him in the ribs "AAAH!"
"Shut your mouth and listen! Never interrupt when Jean's speaking!" Kitty hissed before politely nodding, allowing Jean to continue
"Thank you, Katherine. Now where was I? The ice castle…the opera… Ah, yes, the merchants! Well, then we passed through this murky fog, and then I fell asleep. Then I felt like I was being lifted into the sky by angels. And then I instantly woke up, with bits of bagel crumbs on my shirt. The rest, as they say…is history." Jean concluded, as Lance remained silent for two seconds before laughing hysterically
"What? You think my story is FUNNY? How dare you insult my imagination!" Jean snarled as Lance continued to cackle
"That's the biggest load of bupkiss I've ever heard!" Lance howled, kicking his knees, while rolling on the floor giggling
"Hmmph. Laugh all you want, I, however, think this might make a good novel." Jean huffed, as she headed for the typewriter
"Well, you know what they say: Imagination can do some pretty crazy stuff to people. And mutants." Kitty groaned as Lance continued to cackle before Kitty saw a half-eaten bagel on a plate.
Was it a figment of Jean's imagination…Or WAS it?