A/N: A.K.A. That time at 4:30 where I couldn't sleep due to intense pain in my throat after burning it on a potato and got really bored after reading an entire book and all the Rise of the Guardians fic I'm interested in because I saw it a few days ago (and while we were at the cinema my friend dropped his iPod down a broken coin slot in one of the random arcade machines there) and it's one of the best films ever (and I've already made arrangements to see it again) and decided to finish the fic that's been sat collecting dust in a note on my iPod since July.

I blame my extensive MLP knowledge on my 6 year-old sister who, thankfully, recently grew out of that stage.

Cross-posted to Ao3.

Autocorrect is my beta.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognisable characters (no matter how OOC I make them) do not belong to me, they belong to their respective owners. I make no profit from this, it is merely a product of boredom and/or lack of sleep.

Warnings: Several terrible puns and slight magical nudity.

Several magical failures

1) In which Loki inadvertently masters shape-shifting while unconscious

It was the middle of summer in Asgard, but you couldn't tell that as it wasn't even dawn yet. Thor, ever the early riser, thundered toward his brother's room, not thinking about whether Loki would appreciate being disturbed at the early hour.

Loki, like most normal people, was still asleep at the ungodly hour of the morning. It had been a warm night and he'd chosen comfort over modesty and forgone wearing anything on his torso to bed.

Thor hammered on his brother's door, yelling at Loki to get up as he had things to discuss with him, important things (important to Thor, at least). Loki responded with a muttered 'go away' in the general direction of the door. Thor, never one to back down from a challenge (or take a hint), ignored his brother's mumblings and barged into the room and was met with the full force of Loki's death glare, the glare that made you think twice about doing anything with the sheer amount of rage and malice it held just behind the promise of what the wielder of it was about to do to your intestines, and a ball of magic to the gut as he shot up from the pillows, the cover slipping down chest as he sat up.

Thor's eyes widened comically and he quickly looks toward the ceiling as he took in his brother's state of undress. Loki smirks and raised an eyebrow.

"Why so shocked, Thor? It's not as if you haven't seen me in less." Thor stammered for a moment before responding.

"You have erm... That is, you might want to... Err..." He gestured toward Loki's chest area as he stumbled over his words. Loki looked down an immediately saw what Thor was referencing. Instead of his usual, flat-chested, very male self, he was now very much female, as evidenced by his now voluptuous chest. He/she grabbed the sheets and pulled them up to her neck in a hurry, her eyes as wide as Thor's.

The awkward silence seemed to stretch on forever.

"Well, it seems as though I've mastered the art of shape-shifting while unconscious, now I just need to figure out how to change back while I'm awake."

"Hmm…"

"Never speak of this again?"

"Agreed."

2. In which Loki accidentally turns the Avengers and himself into My Little Ponies

(Inspired by the picture that MaverikLoki drew for me in exchange for me writing a fic for her.)

It was a magical mistake that could be blamed on several things. A funny mistake but a mistake nonetheless. It could be blamed on Tony for interrupting Loki mid-spell, admittedly then the blame would be on Loki for attempting to cast the spell in the first place but it was still technically Tony's fault that all of the Avengers and Loki were stood in a holding room at S.H.I.E.L.D., as My Little Ponies.

Actual Ponies. Cutie marks and all.

Tony was red with a gold-ish mane, and a cutie Mark that looked like the helmet from the Iron Man suit. Clint and Natasha were both black, Clint with a dark purple mane and an arrow for his mark, Natasha's mane was red with a spider for a mark. Thor was a silvery grey with a black mane and (what else) Mjolnir for a cutie mark. Bruce was dark green with a bright green mane and a conical flask for a cutie mark. Steve was blue with a red mane and his shield for a cutie mark.

You had to hand it to Loki, it may not have been the spell he was aiming for, but it was pretty cool.

Well, at least Tony thought so.

(It took 2 days for Loki to work out how to change them back, and another day for S.H.I.E.L.D. to convince Loki that he should turn the Avengers back as well as himself.

The first thing Tony did was eat, then he holed himself away in his workshop for a week trying to create magic-proof armour.

He didn't succeed. The next time they fought, Loki managed to turn him into a hedgehog, and re-sized the armour so it still fit him.)

And 1 accidental success

1. In which Loki is an angsty, angsty Disney princess.

It started with a spell.

A simple spell to call a small bird to him to prove to himself that he was still able to control some aspect of himself. He wasn't sure why he chose a bird, maybe he was subconsciously seeking some form of companionship that he could not find in a state of the art waffle iron or a coffee maker that produced the best hot chocolate with whipped cream and frothed milk with just a hint of mint that had ever graced the taste buds of mankind.

After a while, even the bird left him, just like everyone else.

But then more creatures appeared. Day by day he noticed more animals would follow him as he wandered the streets, looking for something to do until he slunk back to his apartment late at night. He wondered, at times, whether this could be his own magic acting out unconsciously in an attempt to relieve the crushing loneliness he felt at times.

After a few days of having the furry congregation, he had to grudgingly admit to himself, though he would deny it if ever challenged about it, that they were kind of cute.

It started with a bird.

It ended with him smiling for the first time in what felt like forever.

A/N: Whoa too many line-breaks

I did not realise just how angsty the accidental success was.

To anyone who has not yet seen Rise of the Guardians, I strongly urge you to go see it. It's bloody amazing.

In other news, I recently put the Game of Thrones OST on my iPod and it's almost as inspiring as the Inception soundtrack.

(I wrote Incestion three times before I got that right. I'm a bad person.)

xoxo
~HappyEmoness