I don't own the Kane Chronicles whatsoever. Note this is from my OC's point of view.
I Give the Egyptian God of Toilet Paper Dating Advice
"You called me here why" I ask Anubis who is sitting across from me at the table in the middle of the graveyard.
"I need" he pauses and blushes so hard that for a second I thought he couldn't breathe "I need dating advice."
For about five minutes I just laugh. Then I look at Anubis who is redder than a tomato and I crack up all over again.
"it's not funny" Anubis whines.
"fine, fine" I say "first up no whining" Anubis opens his mouth to say something but I interrupt him "second you gotta be romantic." Anubis cocks his head confused and I mentally face palm. "you know hold her hand, maybe even a kiss." Anubis blushes once more probably thinking about kissing whoever he likes. "now what do you have planned." Anubis cocks his head and I pace palm again this time physically. "what are you going to do on your date."
"I don't know" he says.
"where did you go on your last date" I question him.
He blushes even harder than I thought possible. "I've never been on a date before" he says finally.
"seriously" I laugh causing Anubis to blush even harder.
"since I know you can't go anywhere outside of graveyard I suggest you find the most romantic grave yard possible" I say "and I know the perfect one. Can you transport us to the Southeast graveyard of Southland Pennsylvania?"
Anubis nods and opens up a portal. We step through it. When we come out of the portal I see lights and beautiful settings and a table right in the center.
"wow what is this place" asks an amazed Anubis.
"the Southeast graveyard of Southland Pennsylvania, aka the place my mom and dad got married, aka the place my grandmother is buried" I say. "Now what are you planning on bringing her."
"huh" Anubis questions. For that I slapped him on the back of the head. "Ouch what the heck."
"that was a Gibbs slap" I say.
"well it hurts" complains Anubis.
"for a god you a real wimp" I laugh.
"am not" wines Anubis. For than I grab his arm and flip him literally knocking him out, which is interesting because he's a god after all I didn't even know he could sleep.