Priorities
discordance.
It was only meant to be a fling. They never expected it would grow into something more. They could've had a happily-ever-after story, if only one would give. But, both of them weren't just like that.
Why did they have to be so rational? Could they just be irrational…just for this once? Just for the sake of each other's happiness?
She knew that he was just lying on his bed at the next room, but she couldn't get herself to stand up and go. She already knew what her decision is, and that is, to leave him. But every time she thought of him just lying on his bed at the next room, waiting her decision, she would have second thoughts.
She never wanted to have regrets. Though she has always believed that once a person decided, he shouldn't regret his decision, this situation seemed to scream to her, that whatever her decision is, she would regret it.
Finally, she stood up. She took a deep breath, and walked into the hallway. Then her door shut.
She was right. He was just lying on his bed, wide awake. He didn't look away from the ceiling that he was looking at for some time already. His shallow breathing was the only thing that showed her thinking that he recognized her presence. He was waiting for her to speak up.
She lied on the other side of the bed, facing the ceiling; she doesn't know how to begin. She knew that he already knew what her decision was, but didn't say anything. He, too, was afraid of what her decision would bring, but they both knew it was for the best.
So, no regrets? They both hoped so.
"I'm sorry." She began. There was an underlying pain on her voice. Different from the usual chipper ones she always gave. One of the things that made him attracted to her…
"I am too."
"I, well, I'm not one for long distance relationships. I know that within a month we would lose our touch, I would stop answering your calls and e-mails. It would only prolong the inevitable—us being apart. And well, it would be difficult for me to start over here, if I would stay, and it's the same for you there. We both have our own priorities and I…I…"
"I know." He gave a slight nod.
His lack of answer made her wince. She hoped that he would scream at her; make her elaborate her decision, anything—just not this. It bothered her. Couldn't he just tell her what he was thinking? Just this once? She hated it that he was always shutting her out. But then, that's what she wanted right? To hate him? So that it wouldn't kill her more?
"Do you want us to…well, keep in touch? As friends, I mean?" He asked.
"I…don't know." She wanted to. But she knows it would kill them both. Once they said their hellos, either one of them would just take the next flight to the other's country. It was for the better. She hoped.
"I understand." He replied, still looking at the ceiling.
Here he goes again. He understood. What did he not understand? It frustrated her. She couldn't help but feel guilty, and be angry at the same time. But maybe, that's the best and worst part of him—he always understood.
She looked at him the first time since she walked onto his room. Her lungs tightened, and at the first time too, this evening, her arms trembled, her shoulders shook, and she felt eyes water. So she hung her head down, she didn't want him to notice.
"Could we at least…be…until I leave?"
He put her fingers on her chin, lifted it up, and without warning, he kissed her. It was sweet, full of passion, but filled with longing. As they kissed, she felt some liquid drop onto her cheeks that was definitely not from her eyes. From the soft and sweet, their kiss turned into rough and hard. They both didn't want to stop. For it would definitely be the last kiss they would ever share, at least for this lifetime.
It's almost a year since their last meeting. They didn't keep in touch, like what she expected. And to say that she's missing him was an understatement.
Whatever she felt at that span of three months was unknown to her. She knows it wasn't love; nobody falls in love in only just three months. But, she knew, that they both could've fallen if only time wasn't so cruel. If only.
And, she was sure, that was she felt; it was something close to that. Like an infatuation…or something. That would only explain why she was still hung up on him, couldn't find an attraction with another guy…But then, it has only been ten months, hasn't it? Some people were hung up on their past loves with a year or so…right?
As she thought of this, she forced herself to sleep. Like she always does.
Little did she know, at the other side of the world, another was lying on the bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking, and forcing himself to fall to the deep burrows of sleep.
AN: Hope you're not bored with this. Sorry it's too short, but I was never the wordy one, so here you go. Please tell me what you think, because I'm planning to create a multi-chaptered fic related to this, and I need your opinions so I can decide if I would make one…or not. Thank you very much.