Haunted Heart

Part One - Minor Chords

Timeline: Set post Eclipse.
Summary: Bella is gone. Off to become a Vampire's bride. Jacob is left heartbroken, but just as he starts dealing with the situation things take a different turn.
Warnings: Nothing particular for this part. Content is according to rating. However, this fic will end - to put it mildly - pretty off-canon-y. Be prepared for anything. Don't read if you're into fluffy happy endings only.

This is a three part fic. Hugs and kisses, as usual, to my beta reader. Remaining errors are mine.

Disclaimer: The Twilight Saga and all here portrayed characters belong to their respective owners - not me. Deviations from the originals are mine.


Not much had changed since the last time he had seen La Push. The weather was still gloomy, the pack was still on duty and Bella was still gone. Seth on the other hand had grown another 5 inches. And him and the others had looked surprisingly happy to see him again. Even Sam. He had been welcomed by ear deafening howls as soon as he had crossed the boarder of the reservation.

So glad you're back!

Hey bro... Good to have you back.

We missed you. A little.

You look a tad shaggy, Jake.

Indeed, he hadn't bothered to cut his hair while in his wolf form and by now rebellious strands were flopping into his eyes. But he decided that he didn't care.

After he had literally wolfed down a load of food a family of four could live two weeks by he had dropped onto his bed just to sleep two days in a row. He still didn't feel the same after that, but life was back to normal. Almost.

"Haven't heard from her in two months." Seth said out of the blue when they were sitting on the porch in the late evening sun.

"She's probably already one of them." Jacob murmured, sipping on a lukewarm Coke. "Good thing I don't care."

"Jake..."

"I'm over it, okay?" he said, much louder than he had planned. They both knew he would probably never be over it and even though he had tried really hard he just couldn't stop hurting. She was in every step he took, in every beat of his heart, in every single breath. And she would always be.
"So… I take it you didn't imprint on anyone."

"Nope. You?"

"Nah." Seth shrugged. "Not keen on it anyway."

A wolf was howling in the distance and Seth jumped up, giddy as a whelp. "My turn. See ya later!"

"Yeah…" Jake watched him disappear into the forest and then sighed. "Why do we still have to do this, dad? They're long gone."

Billy Black had quietly appeared on the porch. His face was calm but there was concern in his eyes.

"Others will come. There will always be us and them. And the Cullens might come back someday."

"Ugh." Jacob wrinkled his nose but there was a deep sadness in his eyes. He had changed. The carefree boy was gone. Swept away by a much stronger, much darker force in him. A force that could easily destroy him.

Billy put a hand on his shoulder. "I'm glad you're back."

It would have been Jake's turn to say "Me, too." but he was quiet and Billy left.

Jacob just kept sitting there, staring blankly into space until Seth returned from the forest.

"You're still here." he said. "It's been three hours."

Three hours? Sure enough, the sun had already set.

"Sam would like to meet you by…"

"No." It was an offhanded decision, but Jake would not phase today, or tomorrow, for that matter. This was a choice he never got to make before, with them around. But now that she had chosen to give up her mortality he started appreciating it. He didn't want to live to see a few hundred years if it meant seeing her with him forever. FOREVER.

"YOU go tell him that." Seth said and walked away.

And he did. Didn't make a fuss or a secret out of it, just straight out told them.

"I quit."

Of course, they all stared at him like he was somehow mad.

"I…" Sam began with a dangerous vibe to his voice but Jake shook his head.

"Please, Sam. I know you can make me, but please… don't."

The pack leader was silent for a moment, brow furrowed, eyes tense. They all knew Jacob was walking on the edge. There was a constant battle between reason and madness in his head and it was all her fault. They knew he had to stop. There was no other way for him to keep sane. To get his life back in order.

"You know the elders will not approve."

"I don't need their approval."

"Jake, we need you." Seth said heartsick. "Maybe you could just take a break... You know, go on vacation. And join us again when the bloodsuckers return!" He was obviously thrilled by his own idea and Jake couldn't help but smile. Seth was still a whelp after all.

"Let him go."

Everyone turned to stare a Leah pointing at Jacob. "Look at him. He's a mess. He wouldn't be any help to us anyway. He would probably only get himself killed one of these days. " She tried to sound casual but her eyes were gentle. "Let him go."

Jake thanked her with a silent nod.

"What are you gonna do?" Quil asked into the silence.

"Leave." Jake replied straight out. This place is killing me.

"What about your dad?"

"He'll be fine." Sam answered to everyone's surprise. "I'll make sure." He was the leader, he would stay true to his word no matter what. The pack was a big family and Billy would never be alone. And he'd understand.

Jake had never been big with words and there was no use moping around the reservation for another 6 months, so he just stepped forward and gave each of them a brotherly hug. They knew he would not return on his own terms this time.

"Take care, Jake." Sam said.

"And stay in touch." Embry added.

So Jacob said goodbye to his dad, packed the rabbit and left, while a lonely wolf was howling in the distance.

He didn't look back. He was just glad to be on the road. And the more he got away from the reservation, from the pack, from Forks, the more he could breath. It was like a big weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He didn't stop once to phase and he didn't even miss it. It was like he had left that part of himself back at the reservation, somewhere between Forks and La Push…

He kept driving for days until he reached San Francisco, where he stopped. Somehow knowing he could stop running. He could find peace here, for a while. So he rent a small room in an apartment near the harbor and took a job as a mechanic in the garage downstairs. Adapting to this new life was harder than he thought, but he managed. He would be doing pretty well actually, if it weren't for the fact that he kept seeing her everywhere. Day by day, week after week. And just as he had accepted that she had made a freak out of him he got an unexpected visitor.

He was working a late shift, fixing up an old Mustang, when he heard footsteps behind him. Since he had stopped phasing three months ago his senses had begun to return to normal, so it took him a few moments to recognize them. When he did he dropped the wrench and spun around, squinting at the person in front of him.

It was her. Isabella Swan. And she was just as beautiful as he remembered. Painfully beautiful and possibly deadly.

He took a few steps back until he bumped into the Mustang.

"What do you want?" He asked, his voice shaky and hoarse.

"Jake?" She sounded like she was about to cry. "It's really you!" she flung herself at him before he could react, clutching on him like mad. He held his breath, didn't dare touch her cold lifeless body until he realized that she was neither cold nor lifeless. Her tiny frail shoulders were shaking while she was sobbing uncontrollably into his shirt. She was breathing. She smelled like strawberries and she was warm against the bare skin on his arms.

He grabbed her shoulders and pushed her away from him, holding her at arms length.

"You're alive." he realized and basked in the sight of her flushed face and her beautiful brown eyes. "You're alive!" He crushed her back to his chest, constantly mumbling "You're alive." into her hair, stunned, overwhelmed, incredulous.

They stood there for a while, clinging to each other, until he took her chin into his hand and made her look at him, wiping her tears away with his thumb.

"What happened? Did he hurt you?"

"No, I… I couldn't... I couldn't do it." she replied, sniffing.

"Do what?" His insides were in turmoil.
"Marry him." Bella mouthed and pulled away from him.

He stared at her in disbelief. She was alive and she hadn't married the vampire.

He ran his fingers through his shaggy hair and started pacing. She was alive! She hadn't married him! But why was she here? And what about those stupid Mafia vampires?
"Are they here, too?" he stopped to look at her.

Bella looked puzzled. "Who?"

"The bl… The Cullens."

"I'm alone."

"So...What did you tell them?"

"I... nothing." she stared at the floor. "I just left. I figured Alice..." she raised her hands in a helpless gesture just to drop them again.

Jacob nodded. Alice would know where she went. "He will come looking for you, right?"

"Yeah."

He sighed. Edward would arrive, be all gloomy and sparkly and sweep her off her feet again. He had a knack for that sort of thing. There was no use looking for a hidden meaning behind her being here. She was just scared. A runaway bride. "You know he might have a chance against me these days."

She looked up at him. "So you really… quit."

He nodded. "It was easier than I thought. Here, away from… everything."

"Why did you quit?"

"I don't know. Why did you bail?" A low blow.

She blinked. "I..." She had to gather herself, reluctantly, but then she started explaining. "I... We were heading to the Caribbean. For the wedding. Because I... you know... didn't want the big family thing and all. They have a house on a remote island. It's really beautiful... And it was all perfect because... that's how they are." She was staring down on her hands, shrugging. "But I was sitting there, realizing that as much as I love them and as much as I wanted to spend my eternity with... him... there was one thing I couldn't do without. Not for a day or a week, especially not for an eternity." She glanced at him, her brown eyes overflowing with sorrow. "My soul is torn in two, Jake. My heart is torn. And I always thought I had chosen to keep the bigger part and let the smaller part go." She took a few steps in his direction. "And then I got here. And I saw you standing there. And..."

"Bella..." He closed the distance separating them with two long strides. "Before you say anything you'll regret later, I want you to know something." He took a deep breath. "My sole reason for everything... quitting the pack, leaving my family… was you."

It was her turn to look confused again.

"Becoming mortal was the only way to finally… let go of you. Because I would eventually die someday and this torture would have an end."

She looked like she was about to cry again, but she just put her arms around his waist and hugged him tight.

"I love you." She whispered into his shirt.

"I love you more." He replied just as quiet.

"I wouldn't be so sure about that." She said, rose up to her tiptoes, took his face in her hands and kissed him. It only lasted a second but when she was about to pull away again he put his arms around her to hold her there. It was the first time that she had initiated a kiss and he tried to read her face, which was just inches away from his. Her eyes sparkled determined and somehow passionate.

"What are you saying?" he asked.

"I found out that I had left the bigger part of my heart behind." She explained softly. "The beating part. The living part. I hoped the pain would stop once I was surrounded by them, but it didn't. It got worse. There was one thing Edward couldn't do. He couldn't mend my heart. He couldn't replace you."

"So you left him for me?" No use beating around the bushes anymore.

"I did."

Jake was dumbfounded. "Are you sure about that? I mean... you're not just here to sweet talk me and leave again tomorrow?"

"I'm not gonna leave." There was still the same determination in her eyes but his mind refused to believe her. He was sure she would change her mind any minute now. And there was another problem… He let go of her and backed away a little.

"I can't protect you anymore. You're not safe here."

She stared at him for a second. She obviously hadn't thought of that and his heart sank.

"I don't care." She shook her head to reassure herself.

"But they do, Bella."

"Let's go back to La Push then. The pack can protect both of us."

"I'm not going back, Bells."
"But I'm here, Jake. You don't have to run anymore. You can return to your family. I'm not going to leave!"

"I can't." he reached out to her, pleading. "You have to understand that. I need to stay away."

She stepped forward and took his hands. "I understand."

"I want to live a normal life, Bella. Not having to control myself every minute of the day. Not being afraid of imprinting on a random stranger. I want to have a family. Grow old with someone..." he trailed off while his thumbs traced invisible lines on her hands. "I want to be able to make my own decisions. Every day."

"Then we have to find another way." She simply said. "If you're not going to leave and I'm not going to leave we might as well stay here."

He couldn't believe she was really standing there, holding his hands, telling him she would never leave him again.

"What about him?"

A pained expression crept across her face.

"You love him." It was a statement, not a question.

"I do."

"And still you left him." He waited for her to tell him 'Because I love you more than him' but she didn't speak. It didn't matter anyway. She had come back for him. She had left the man she had agreed to marry for him. She had stayed alive for him.

Finally she sighed and looked up at him.

"I chose you, Jake. Don't look at me like that." She said and returned to hug him. It was as if those nine months without her had turned into nine minutes. The only difference was, he was not a werewolf anymore. Now he was just a regular 18-year-old boy in the body of a 25-year-old.

"I hope you won't miss the wolf." He muttered into her hair.

"I won't, because I don't have to worry about you running off to fight vampires anymore."

"Will you miss me being shirtless all the time?"

"Maybe a little." She replied blushing and he chuckled softly. They stood there for a while, just happy to be in each other's arms.

"Does your dad know where you are?" He had to ask. He knew Charlie would be worried sick otherwise.

"Kind of."

He raised an eyebrow and she went on to explain. "It wasn't easy to find you. I had to call your dad. And he called my dad." She shrugged.

"So you didn't go home first."

"No. I called your dad from the airport and took the next plane to San Francisco."

"You really needed to see me."

"I really did."

"Are you happy now?"

"I am." She smiled. "Are you?"

"Are you kidding me? You're here. You're alive. And you gave up immortality for me."

"I think we're even now." She replied with a shrug. "So the fact that I love you isn't important to you anymore?"

"It's the most important part, honey. The thing is just… I always knew you loved me." He grinned and she punched him.

"I can't imagine you getting old and gray, Jacob Black." She mused.

"We will both get old and gray someday, sweetie." He said and played with a strand of her auburn hair.

"But we will be old and gray together."

His stomach fluttered. This was all he had ever wanted. Growing old with her. Not having to share her with some undead dude. So he bent down and kissed her. Gentle and almost careful, afraid he would drive her back again. But just like the last time they had shared an intimate kiss in the woods just outside Forks she didn't pull away but kissed him back. Her lips parted and the innocence faded in favor of passion. She clung her fingers into his hair, almost greedy, while their tongues collided and entwined. He pulled her even closer until there was not an inch of space between them. He could feel her, taste her, smell her, hear her. She was in all of his senses and it was overwhelming. He picked her up and sat her on top of the Mustang's hood, still considerate enough though to push her legs to one side when he moved closer. He was still prepared to be punched in the face because that's how it had always been. But she didn't even pull away. He could hold her, kiss her, touch her and she lounged in his arms like a cat. She moved in ways he didn't think her capable and he had to stop himself for a moment to check if it was really Bella and not just one of those hallucinations again. She looked up at him, breathless, her cheeks flushed. He put a few loose strands of her hair behind her ear and she snuggled up to his chest.

"That was not how I remembered it."

"We both changed." He replied, smiling. "We were both young and stupid then. Now you're simply young and I'm simply stupid."

A half-smile lit up her ivory features just to be replaced by thoughtfulness. "You never imprinted on anyone, right?"

What a weird change of subject. "Never."

"Are you glad?"

"I am." He shifted her a bit so he could sit down on the hood beside her. "You know, there were times I wished so hard every day that I would imprint on you. I thought if I'd imprinted on you, you would maybe love me back and stay with me. I would stare at you, trying to will myself to imprint." He laughed softly. "But it didn't happen, obviously. When I realized it would never happen I tried to imprint on other girls. But that didn't work out well either. And after thinking about it for a while I figured that it wouldn't matter anyway. No matter how, I would have always chosen you. No doubt about it. You are my only destiny, Bella Swan."

There were tears in her eyes by the time he stopped talking and she started crying silently into his shoulder.

"Why are you crying, honey?"

"I don't know. It's like I can suddenly feel all the pain I've been causing you. All the worries and heartaches. Oh god..." she clutched her chest and sobbed uncontrollably. "I'm so sorry Jake."

"Don't be, Bells. You're here now."

"But I'm so late! And I almost killed myself for… for that stupid vampire!"

He started. Did she just call her ex a stupid vampire?

"Bella, calm down. We'll be okay."

"I will never leave you again, Jake." She vowed. "I love you. More than I ever thought I could. I can't live without you and I couldn't even die without you." She laughed devoid of humor and he flinched at the thought. "You would have hated me, right?"

"I told you I would love you until your heart stops beating." He replied. "And I lied. I would never stop there. God knows I tried. So be assured, you will be loved. As long as my heart is beating."

She smiled and put her ear to the spot just above his heart, listening to its beat.

"Bella?"

"Mmh?"

"So, you love me more than him, right?"

"Right."

There was a loud bang outside the garage and a car alarm went off. Jake jumped off the hood and put himself in front of Bella. He might not be a werewolf anymore but he was still a 6'7'' tall guy.

"I'm gonna go have a look." He said. "You stay here." He moved to the gate and peeked outside. There was a silver car parked in the driveway, blinking and honking furiously and looking a bit dented on the side. It was a Volvo and its owner was standing right next to it, fists still clenched, the face a mask of anger and despair.

"Edward." Jake noticed simply.

"Jacob." He returned the greeting but his voice was cold as ice.

"Are you here to take her with you again?" Jake growled, feeling a familiar kind of anger rolling down his spine.

"I came here to see if she was okay."

"She is fine."

"Why don't you let her talk for herself." Edward said and Jake could feel her stepping beside him. He swallowed hard. This wasn't supposed to happen for another few days, or maybe months. He turned to look at her and saw that she was standing there frail like a blade of grass, swaying in the breeze.

"You never said goodbye." Edward said and Bella flinched.

He dared accusing her?

"I'm sorry." She whispered. "I just couldn't."

Edward took a glance at Jacob. "I know." He replied. "I always knew. I knew that if you only felt half of what he feels for you for him, I would lose you."

She wrapped her arms around herself and Jake clenched his fists. Bastard.

"Stop it." He hissed and Edward's cold stare turned sad.

"He deserves you so much more than I."

"Edward..."

"It's okay Bella. You had to make a choice. And you made the right one."

She was shaking now but Jake didn't move. He couldn't. Seeing her torn like that broke his heart but he was not sure he would be able to fix it. Fix her. He, Jake, was the reason that she was broken in the first place. The bigger part of her heart might be with him, but there was still a piece belonging to Edward. And Edward only.

"Jacob." Edward was addressing him now. "There's one thing I need you to do. You have to bring her back to Forks. To the pack. She is not safe here."

There was no pity or anger in his eyes, just sadness.

"Are they coming?"

Edward nodded.

"How long?"

"Five days. Maybe a week."

Jake sighed heavily. He knew it would come to this eventually, but he hadn't expected Edward to back down.

"You don't have to go back because of me." She whispered, aware of his inner struggle, but he just took her hand.

"Thank you for the heads up." He said to Edward. "We will be in Forks by morning."

The vampire nodded, took one last look at Bella and then got into his car and sped away.

"Jake..."

"Shh." He put a finger to her lips. "It's okay. We'll be fine." The time to be selfish was over. He couldn't outrun his destiny any longer. Being a shape shifter was part of who he was. He was a protector. He had always been her protector and he couldn't stop now. She needed him more than ever. Even though he would probably end up all alone eventually, he would never abandon her.

"So... you will be a werewolf again?"

He glanced down at her. She was still shaking but there was something new in her eyes. Despair?

"I don't know."

"It could all be so easy." She murmured. "We could be… we would be…But I happen to be a magnet for supernatural things and you a werewolf."

"Right now we're just two more or less ordinary teenagers." He replied with a crooked smile.

There were tears glistening in her eyes but she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulled him close and kissed him. Her lips lingering on his until he had to pull away.

"Are you sure about your choice?" he asked and she cocked an eyebrow.

"Are you backpedaling?"

"I'm not backpedaling. I'm just not sure..."

"Backpedaling!"

He growled and hugged her real tight, his cheek resting on her head.

"Your dad is going to kill me."

"He just might. But he also loves you."

"So I will get to die a quick death?"

"Maybe."

Seagulls were squawking in the distance while they remained close, almost like melted to each other.

"We have to leave soon, don't we?" Bella mumbled into his chest.

"Yeah. There's a flight every two hours."

"And you were really all alone here, all this time?"

"Yes." Her topic changes kept getting weirder. She had to be really confused.

"Where do you live?"

"Just above the garage. I don't have a lot of stuff, but I could make you a coffee if you would like."

"That would be nice."

Thankfully, due to his almost non-existent stuff, there was nothing cluttering the floor of his apartment, which was already small enough without any furniture in it. Bella wandered around the room, touching and looking at the few things that were lying around while he bumbled about in the kitchen that was actually merely a closet with a stove in it.

"What's this?" She asked and showed him a small wooden carving. It was a tiny figurine, obviously female, gracefully balancing on one foot while it's hair was flowing behind it like a long silky curtain.

"Oh, that's you." He was really proud of that piece of work.

"Me?"

"I never had a picture of you. So this was my way of remembering you."

She stared at it, clearly in awe of the richness of detail. "It's beautiful."

"Just like you." She blushed and he smiled. "It's yours."

"Oh no, I can't..."

"Keep it." He took her hand and closed it over the carving. "Please."

She kept looking at it, a faint smile on her rosy lips. "Edward was wrong." She said eventually.

"About what?"

"About you deserving me." She sat down on the bed, which served as sofa and kitchen chair at the same time. "I was always worried that you wouldn't be enough for me... Compared to him. But actually it's the other way around. I don't deserve you. You're way too good for me. Or anyone."

"Are you done?" He sat down beside her. "You're a mess. I'm a mess. I think we're perfect for each other." He kissed the tip of her nose and she smiled.

"I feel at home when I'm with you." She confessed. "At peace. Complete."

"Almost complete."

"Oh shut up." She replied and proceeded to kiss him like never before, with her hands in his hair and her body pressed to his. It felt so good to not be afraid of touching her. Right now and right here she was his.

His hand that was resting on her hip slipped beneath her shirt, touching the bare skin on the small of her back and she shivered. He could feel her lower lip trembling slightly and he continued to move his hand upwards, rolling up the shirt in the process. She raised her arms so he could pull the shirt over her head and just a second later his hands were on her back again, grazing the clasp of her bra, hesitating. It was not the first time that he was doing something like that but he couldn't help but marvel at the fact that he was holding her in his arms. He had been waiting for this moment for so long now...

Her fingers found their way under his shirt and he had to pull himself together to keep his brain from short-circuiting. She always did that to him. He couldn't help it. The touch of her fingers echoed across his skin and into regions of his body that used to be so out of bounds with her. She had obviously changed her mind about that because she arched her back and pulled him with her until he was somehow resting on top of her. On a normal day he would have told her not to hurry into things, but today was different. There might be only days left for them. Why worry about etiquette or chastity? They had to seize the moment... Right?

"Stop thinking, Jake." She said. "It doesn't suit you."

"Bella," he replied, brushing her lower lip with his thumb. "you have no idea."

"About what?"

"About how much I would love to stop thinking right now."

He could see the conflict in her face. She was definitely inclined to 'stop thinking', too but there was also something else in her eyes. Guilt. Of course, she had just broken up with Edward – her fiancé.

Jake shifted his weight until he was lying next to her and put a blanket over her. "You should try and get some sleep. I will wake you again in two hours."

She put her arms around him, obviously kind of thankful for his self-control. "I'm sorry." She mumbled into his chest and he put his lips to her forehead. "No need to be sorry for anything, Bells. I love you and that will never change. Now sleep."

She snuggled up to him, closed her eyes and that's when the phone started ringing. There were only two people out there who had his number so he figured a phone call at this hour had to be important.

"I'll be right back." He said, kissed the top of her head and went to get the phone. The second he answered a glass downstairs shattered and the last thing he remembered was hearing a female voice shouting something at him through the phone and then – darkness.