Break Me Down
Author: Kat
Notes: My first One Tree Hill fic. Lately, I've felt inspired to write something Brooke/Lucas related, seeing as how we've had a lax of scenes between the two. Schwann's negligence of this fab couple has driven me to finally delve deep into the world and minds of Brooke Davis & Lucas Scott.
Pairing: Brooke/Lucas.
Spoilers: Up to Season 5, Episode 5.05, "I Forgot To Remember To Forget". Anything else is purely cannon.
Dedication: Joanna, because she's reminded me why I fell in love with this show and this couple in the first place. Also, gotta give a shout-out my girls in the Passions fandom who've been nothing but supportive in respect to me writing again!
Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own. Robert Heinlein
The cool breeze on a summer's day flickered against her soft, chocolate brown locks. The scent of the fresh dew on the olive colored grass nearby infiltrated her being, almost from sense memory.
Spring was here.
Another year gone by.
One thousand, four hundred and sixty days since she'd left the one place that made sense to her in the fast-paced word
Three hundred and sixty five days before that, her heart bled. Shattered into a million pieces by his stunning declaration of love.
A love so deep, so complex, that she'd pushed him away, straight into the hands of her waiting best friend. A mistake she'd always regret.
What had been perceived as catty jealousy and resentment had spiraled into something she couldn't accurately describe. The thought of her life, sans Lucas Scott, was not something she undertook lightly. A schoolgirl crush, a love struck relationship gone terribly awry…what could be more storybook angst than that?
There was more to come; this she was all too aware. The final chapter had yet to be written, the finale of the triangle finished for the whole world to witness.
She was fiercely independent. Brooke Davis. Brilliant, and beautiful, and brave.
The girl behind the red door?
She cried herself to sleep, reflecting on lost hopes and dreams. Ruminating over the love she'd sacrificed at the sake of her self-worth.
Still, she pondered as the gentle waves crashed over the sand within earshot; what truly could have been?
The fashion designer and the writer? Two point five children and a white picket fence to go along with the soccer Mom minivan complex?
The thought of children was almost unfathomable; She hadn't even seen her godson since he was a few months old.
Little Jamie Scott.
She often thought of him, wondering if he had Haley's charm, and Nathan's smile. Really, it wasn't his genetics that she often wondered about.
Did Lucas keep up his responsibility as his godfather slash uncle? Did they play basketball twice a week, like Lucas had mentioned to her right after he'd been born?
They'd never gotten a chance to talk about anything other than Peyton the last time they'd spoken. His apparent love for her best friend still pained at her heart, but, such as it were, she pushed it aside. She did the right thing for everyone.
Giving up Lucas Scott was the one mistake she'd regret for the rest of her life, but it was necessarily. She had been the only one with the power to break the cycle.
A life filled with regret and empty promises; the guilt, the accusations of wondering if he'd been thinking about her was not something that she would have coped with.
Someone once told her that love was sacrifice; that if you truly loved someone without reason, without boundaries, you'd set them free.
It was selfless, and she knew that.
Still, the pain was just as deep four years later as it was the day she'd stood in his room, giving one final blow to his heart.
"We go days without having a meaningful conversation, and I used to miss you so much when that happened…but it never seemed like you missed me. I guess because of it I stopped missing you…It shouldn't be like this, Luke."
"Brooke - -"
"I'm sorry. I can't do this anymore."
That was the one thing that she could never take back. The words had come out of her mouth before she'd even realized they'd been spoken.
The void was still open-ended; the ache where no man aside from Lucas had ever become a permanent fixture.
There'd been numerous prospects, a dozen dates. It hadn't been like she'd never tried to let go….but when she compared every man thereafter to Lucas Scott, the probability just didn't surmount to her expectations of the opposing sex.
The moment she'd opened the envelope she'd known it was all over. There they were, in all their blissful, intimate glory.
Cordially invited to one L. Scott & P. Sawyer wedding.
"Two people come together, and even if it's just for one night, they make us believe again."
It should have been her; it should have been them. The life they'd talked about the night of their 'engagement'. A cottage with a white picket fence, children with her brown hair and his blue eyes.
The life they'd always wanted, but never gotten.
Now, he was marrying her best friend, the girl she'd set him free for. The girl who'd successfully shattered her hopes and dreams of a life with him with one sentence.
In a fit of rage, she threw it into the crackling fire, watching as the orange and blue flames tore at their perfect faces; his palm caressing her face while she gazed into his eyes, an innocent laugh etched onto her face.
As the flame died out, she stared on, her lips pursed in thought. There would be no tears of happiness, no congratulatory phone call.
All the numbness and affliction marred her brow as she allowed the cool liquid to trickle down her slender throat. Lifting her glass up in a toast, she threw the glass into the fireplace, staring as the transparent crystal shattered into tiny pieces.
Life had taken the last shred of decency and aspiration she'd once had when Lucas and Peyton decided to rip out her heart.
Now, all she felt was the bitter chill of revenge on her mind, and Brooke knew exactly what the next step was…
A scorned lover's justice for the couple who'd betrayed her in the final hours of the night.