The Mole
The first time it happened, Kara didn't even realize she was doing it.
As had become her habit, she was having lunch with Lena, the other woman complaining about one of her under performing department heads. Content to sit and listen, knowing that Lena didn't have many people she could vent to, Kara propped her chin on her hand, and made herself comfortable. Lena tended to let things build up, and her venting could go on for a while.
"Did I drop food on myself?" Lena asked, interrupting her story about how her head of logistics had failed to turn in his quarterly report on time, thus throwing everyone's work schedule off, to look down at her shirt, and brush away non-existent crumbs.
Kara snapped to attention, shaking her head. "No. Nope. All good. Why would you think that?" Lena was many things, but a messy eater wasn't one of them. That was much more Kara's territory.
"You were staring. And since I assume it wasn't at my cleavage..." Lena let the statement trail off, an amused smile quirking her lips.
Even though Kara knew she was teasing, she felt her cheeks flush in embarrassment, with maybe a hint of guilt. Had her gaze wandered? "What?! No, of course not. I would never do that," Kara defended herself hastily, if not entirely truthfully. It wasn't that Kara hadn't noticed, she did have eyes, and a pulse, but she would never objectify her friend that way.
"Kara, calm down. I know you wouldn't," Lena assured Kara with a laugh. If Kara didn't know better, she would almost think Lena almost sounded a little bit...disappointed? "So no food then?"
Kara shook her head. "Impeccable as always. I must have just spaced out a bit."
"I'm sorry," Lena apologized, looking contrite. "I didn't mean to make you listen to me go on and on. That must have been terribly boring for you."
"No! I love listening to you." It was true, Kara could easily listen to Lena talk about corporate tax filings all day and be content. There was just something about the other woman's voice that Kara found soothing.
"You flatter me," Lena demurred. "But enough about me and my petty work annoyances. Tell me about your day."
Kara smiled, her brief bout of staring already forgotten.
The second time it happened, it was a little bit harder to ignore.
Lena had talked Kara into going with her to the gym. Kara had tried to explain that the gym really didn't do anything for her. Lena wasn't having any of it, and had insisted that Kara could at least keep her company.
Kara had given in, not that it had taken much, since Kara was always looking for an excuse to spend more time with Lena. So that was how Kara found herself jogging casually beside Lena while the other woman cursed and grumbled at her under her breath.
"I did warn you," Kara said with a laugh.
Lena turned her head to glare. "You could at least pretend to be winded." Lena reached up to mop the sweat off her brow with the back of her hand. "Can you even sweat?" Lena demanded indignantly.
"Yup," Kara replied with an unrepentant grin. She would never say it out loud, but there was something especially attractive about Lena when she was angry or annoyed.
Lena narrowed her eyes thoughtfully. "Spill. I don't care if it kills me, if there is something that makes you sweat, we're going to do it."
Kara flushed. She had walked herself right into this one. "Oh, I don't think that would be a good idea," Kara stuttered out, averting her gaze. The combination of a sweaty Lena Luthor, and talking about sex, left her unnerved in a way she couldn't quite describe.
It only took Lena a moment to put the pieces together; she was a genius after all. "Oh! That's um...Yes, well…Good to know." Kara couldn't imagine why that would possibly be good to know, but decided not to dwell on it.
Lena turned her attention back to her running, and Kara spent the next few minutes listening to the Lena's ever increasing heartbeat. Finally, she had enough. Jumping off the treadmill Lena grabbed her towel, and wiped her face. "Okay, that's it. I'm done."
That's when it happened.
Lena grabbed her water bottle, and started chugging, head tilted back. A small droplet of moisture caught her attention, and Kara watched as a small bead of sweat work it's way down Lena's throat when her gaze stuttered to a stop mid-way. Kara watched, transfixed, as the mole on Lena's throat bobbed gently with each swallow.
Logically, there was no reason for the small spot of extra pigment to catch her attention. It was as much a part of Lena as her hard to pin accent, or the way she liked to arch her eyebrow. She had seen it hundreds of times before. Logical or not, Kara found herself rapt.
She knew that she should look away. What kind of creeper started at their friends sweaty neck in the middle of the gym? The Kara Danvers kind apparently, because try as she might, Kara couldn't look away. Her gaze was riveted to the small brown dot on the otherwise blemish free skin. A tiny brown island on a sea of white.
Not that Kara considered it a blemish. Far from it. Kara thought it was perfect. Just like everything else about Lena. Which was a different issue, and not something Kara wanted to delve into in the middle of a crowded gym that smelled like stale sweat and feet.
Finished hydrating, Lena looped her towel around her neck, covering the focus of Kara's attention.
"Next time I'm taking your advice, and leaving you behind." Lena shook her head. "I look like an out of shape lump compared to you."
"You did great," Kara protested loyally.
"I'm dripping in sweat, and I can barely breathe," Lena corrected wryly. "You, meanwhile, don't even have the decency to be mildly winded."
Kara looked around furtively, to make sure no one was standing close by. "I could always ask Alex to lend me a kryp-"
"Absolutely not!" Lena objected vehemently, before Kara could finish her sentence. "You aren't going to expose yourself to...to that because my ego is a bit dented."
Kara smiled at Lena reassuringly. "We'll figure something out."
Even though Kara had originally declined Lena's invitation to the gym, she now found the prospect of no longer being invited unpalatable. Kara suspected it had more to do with getting to see Lena breathless and sweaty, and less to do with keeping her friend company, but she decided not to examine her motives too closely.
Lena used one end of her towel to wipe her throat, and Kara's gaze was once more drawn to the beauty mark that had so captivated her earlier. Now aware, Kara darted her gaze away before Lena could notice her attention. She wasn't sure why she was so fascinated by the small mark, but she resolved to get over it.
How hard could it be?
As it turned out, Kara found it was much harder than she ever could have imagined. She had fought alien criminals, murderous plants, inter-dimensional imps, even her own family, and Kara realized that they had nothing on the hypnotic pull of Lena Luthor's neck mole.
Kara had stopped by Lena's office to follow-up on a story about L-Corp's new air purification nano-tech and discovered that instead of taking notes, she had drawn little doodles of Lena all over the pad. The small mole on her neck featuring prominently in each. Kara convinced herself she was just trying to do a faithful artistic rendering. Totally normal.
Kara and Lena had been minutes away from winning Charades on game night when Kara got distracted in the final round. Focusing on how the flush on Lena's neck provided a nice backdrop to her newest obsession, instead of the the clue Lena was trying to relay. Even though they had lost, something Kara normally hated, she found it hard to regret her inattention.
Even when the mole was covered, it was becoming the focus of her attention. A cold snap had hit National City, and Lena had taken to wearing a scarf to keep the chill at bay. Kara should have been relieved. With her neck covered, surely the mole would cease to be a distraction. If anything, being denied the ability to see it had only increased her desire to do so. Kara hadn't ever thought she was develop a personal grudge against a piece of clothing, yet here she was.
Kara's one consolation through all of this, was that she was confident she was keeping her embarrassing new obsession to herself. Not since that first lunch, which in retrospect, Kara now recognized as the start of this spiral, had Lena said anything to indicate she noticed Kara's new fixation.
Her confidence, it turned out, was misplaced. The notice just didn't come from who she expected.
"We need to talk," Alex said, her voice grave.
Kara had come home to find Alex and Maggie waiting in her apartment. Which, in and of itself, wasn't that weird. Kara was often late due to Supergirl duties, and would come home to find Maggie and Alex waiting for her if they had plans.
Except, they didn't have plans, and Alex had led her over to the couch and pushed her down. Instead of sitting beside her, Alex had taken up residence on the coffee table, and Maggie was standing sentinel behind her.
"Is this an intervention?" Kara asked, perplexed. Kara had seen enough movies to recognize an intervention. She just never thought she would find herself on the receiving end of one. Granted, she ate more potstickers and sticky buns than was probably wise, even with her metabolism, but she thought this was a bit of an overreaction.
"Do you need an intervention?" Alex questioned instead of answering, narrowing her eyes. Another thing that Kara recognized; Alex's interrogation technique.
"Why would I need an intervention?" Kara deflected. Two could play this game.
"I don't know, but since you brought it up, clearly there must be something."
"There isn't." Kara refused to be intimidated by Alex. She wouldn't crack under the steady gaze of her sister. She would hold strong. She was Supergirl for Rao's sake.
"Then why would you say that?" Alex demanded. Kara swallowed nervously. The stare Alex was giving her had enough intensity to give her heat vision a run for its money.
"Babe, focus." Maggie tapped Alex gently on the shoulder. Alex stared intently at Kara for a few more moments before reluctantly nodding. Kara promised herself she would find a way to make it up to her sister's girlfriend. Maggie's ability to defuse Alex was a superpower that Kara often envied.
Alex relaxed her posture, leaning back and resting her hands casually on her knees. Maggie, still standing sentry behind her, rubbed her hand soothingly over the back of Alex's neck. Kara wasn't naive enough to let her guard down. Even if Maggie had an uncanny ability to calm her sister's sometimes volatile temper, Alex never gave up on anything that easily.
"Maggie and I have noticed something recently that we think we need to talk to you about," Alex began.
Definitely an intervention. Kara decided to head her sister off at the pass. "Look, I know that I need to incorporate more fruits and vegetables into my diet. And I will, I promise."
Alex narrowed her eyes. "This isn't about what you're eating."
Maggie snorted, earning her a backhanded slap to the stomach, and a glare, from Alex. Kara felt like she was missing something.
Kara frowned. "Then what is it about?"
"You've been inviting Lena to more and more gatherings. Friday night at the bar, game nights-"
"Are we really doing this again, Alex?" Kara demanded, more than a little angry. "I thought we were past the 'You can never trust a Luthor' crap."
Alex arched one eyebrow, and pursed her lips. "We are. If you would have let me finish," she said pointedly, "I was going to say that since Lena has been coming to more and more events, we couldn't help but notice…that..um..." Alex trailed off, her earlier self assurance draining away, and looked to Maggie for backup.
Maggie patted her comfortingly on the shoulder. "That you can't stop staring at Luthor's chest," Maggie supplied helpfully with a slight smirk.
"What? That's not...I wasn't...I would never do that!" Kara spluttered out indignantly.
"Kara, it's okay...Well, maybe not okay, it is a little inappropriate-"
"-if understandable-" Maggie interjected, earning her another absent minded swat from Alex.
"-but it's not anything you need to be ashamed about."
"Though, maybe try not to stare quite so blatantly," Maggie offered helpfully. "At some point she's going to notice. In fact, if she wasn't always so equally distracted, I'm sure she would have said something by now."
"I haven't been staring at Lena's chest!" Kara protested vehemently. Had she glanced once or twice? Maybe. But in her defense, it was kind of hard to avoid sometimes. She always looked away when she realized what she was doing.
Alex crossed her arms over her chest, looking thoroughly unconvinced by Kara's protest. "Kara, I'm not blind. Much though I would love to say I haven't noticed you checking out Luthor, I have."
Maggie nodded, agreeing with her girlfriend. "I'm a detective, Kara. I notice these things."
Kara crossed her arms over her chest, and slumped backwards into the couch cushions. "Well, you should check your facts again, because I can promise you, I haven't been starting at her chest. I've been staring at her-" Kara clamped her mouth shut mid-sentence. As embarrassing as it was to have Alex and Maggie thinking she was ogling her best friend, she suddenly realized the actual object of her scrutiny may be far more mortifying.
"Staring at her what?" Alex pressed, sensing weakness.
"Nothing," Kara said quickly. "You guys were right. I was totally staring at her chest."
Alex narrowed her yes, not at all convinced. "You know there is no point in trying to keep it hidden. I will get the truth out of you. Spill."
Kara shook her head and remained tight lipped. She couldn't cave at the first threat; she had a reputation to uphold.
"C'mon, Kara, how bad can it be?" Maggie cajoled, clearly taking on the role of good cop. "Whatever it is can't be that bad."
Kara wasn't so sure about that.
"Don't make this harder than it needs to be, Kara," Alex said, her tone riding the knife edge between threatening and cajoling. "You know you can tell me, us, anything."
Kara bit her lip, feeling her resolve waver. On the one hand it would be nice to talk to someone about her confusing new fixation. On the other, there was the very real possibility that she would be teased mercilessly.
Alex's gaze softened. "Okay. If you don't feel like you can talk about it, we won't force you."
"You won't?"
"We won't?"
Alex shook her head. "No. If this isn't something you feel you can trust me with," Alex sighed sadly, "I understand."
"Alex, it's not that I don't trust you," Kara insisted.
"It's fine," Alex said in a tone that betrayed her words.
Kara's already flagging resolve crumbled in the face of her sister's hurt and disappointment. "I wasn't staring at her breasts. I was staring at her...mole."
Alex and Maggie shared a quick, confusion filled, glance.
"I'm sorry, I thought you said her...mole?" Alex asked, hesitating over the last bit. As though certain she couldn't have possible heard correctly.
Kara felt her cheeks fill with heat, and she bit her bottom lip, nodding wordlessly.
"Well that's...unexpected," Maggie said, diplomatically.
"Is it like a...medical thing?" Alex asked, looking equal parts concerned and confused.
"A medical thing?" Kara replied, puzzled.
"Yeah, like, are you scanning for skin cancer or something?" Alex paused, tilting her head to the side thoughtfully. "Though, I'm not sure how your x-ray vision would help, since it penetrates soft tissue. If you suspect something is wrong, you really should encourage her to see someone. You're not a doctor, Kara."
"No! It's not a...a medical thing," Kara spluttered. "I can't really explain it. I didn't even notice I was doing it at first. Once I did, I figured it would be easy to stop."
Alex snorted. "Yeah, how's that been going?"
"Not great, obviously," Kara retorted, glaring at her sister. "I've tried. I just...I can't figure out why I can't stop looking."
"It's really not that complicated," Maggie chimed in, as though stating the obvious.
"You know why I can't stop staring at her?" Kara asked, a hint of desperation shading her tone. She had tried to stop, truly, and if Maggie could offer any insight into her plight, she would gladly take it.
Maggie laughed. "You have the hots for her, Kara." Maggie turned to Alex. "Is this like a family trait or…"
"I wasn't this bad," Alex insisted, crossing her arms.
"I dunno, babe. I did catch you staring at my ass more than a few times when you were still 'straight'," Maggie teased.
"I did not!" Alex denied.
"You kinda did," Kara agreed. Even in the midst of her own personal identity crisis, she couldn't let such a blatant falsehood go unchecked.
"Yeah, well, at least I wasn't fetishising a skin blemish."
"It's not a blemish!" Kara protested hotly. "It's sexy!"
Both Maggie and Alex stopped to look at her pointedly. Oh.
"I like Lena," Kara admitted softly, realization hitting with the force of a White Martian. Replaying it all, Kara realized it probably should have been rather obvious.
"There it is," Maggie quipped, clapping a companionable hand on Kara's shoulder.
"Well, now that you've figured it out, you can do something about it." Alex frowned slightly at just what that would likely entail. Kara was still her baby sister after all. "And finally get the raging eye sex under control. None of us have any desire to see that."
"I wouldn't say none of us," Maggie uttered softly. Though not softly enough that she didn't still earn a glare from Alex.
"Do something about it?" Kara asked blankly, still trying to process the fact that she had been blind to the fact that she was totally infatuated with her best friend.
"Yeah." Alex looked at Kara searchingly. "You are going to tell her right?"
"Tell her?" Kara all but squeaked. She shook her head vehemently. "I can't tell her."
Kara was barely able to process this new information. She couldn't even begin to imagine how Lena would take it.
"Why not?" Alex demanded.
"Because I don't even know what it all means. I've never been attracted to another woman before. I'm not gay." Okay, so maybe she hadn't been entirely joking about wanting to date Lucy Lane. And perhaps she had noticed how well Agent Simmons filled out her tactical gear. And she may have had a tiny little, hardly worth mentioning, crush on Miss Grant. But she wasn't gay.
"You may not be gay, but you certainly aren't straight," Maggie informed her flatly. "Straight women don't spend most of game night trying to stare down their best friend's shirt."
Kara felt her cheeks flame red. "Well, it doesn't matter anyway. Even if I wanted something to happen, Lena's definitely not gay."
Maggie tipped her head, giving Kara a pitying look. "Oh, sweetie."
Kara crossed her arms defensively, shooting her gaze to Alex, who was looking back at her, expression mildly pained. "What?"
Alex cleared her throat, looking uncomfortable. "Luthor definitely has a thing for the ladies."
Kara frowned. "No she doesn't. I think I would know. She's my best friend."
Alex scratched the back of her neck, looking to Maggie for assistance. Maggie huffed softly, before answering. "We've run into her when we've gone out." Kara looked at Maggie, still not following. "To gay bars," Maggie continued.
Kara shook her head. "That doesn't mean anything. I've gone with you and Alex before, that doesn't make me gay." Kara realized, in light of recent revelations that may not be the best argument, but it wasn't like she had known at the time.
"True," Maggie conceded, "but I'm pretty sure you didn't grind on anyone on the dance floor. Or practically shove your tongue down someone's-"
"I think she gets it," Alex interjected, resting a hand on Maggie's shoulder to stem the flow of words.
Kara felt her stomach drop at the picture Maggie's words had painted. If she had had any doubts about her feelings for Lena before, the roiling jealousy coursing through her veins, and the queasy feeling in her stomach would have cleared them up. She knew she didn't have any claim on Lena, but the thought of her with someone else had Kara clenching her fists tightly to keep from punching a hole in her apartment wall.
"It was months ago," Maggie offered apologetically. "We haven't seen her in ages."
Kara shook her head, trying to dispel the unpleasant thoughts. More than the thought of Lena was someone else, Kara found that what hurt the most was the fact that her friend had kept this part of herself a secret. The hypocrisy was not lost on Kara. She had just thought they were past keeping secrets from each other.
"See? She'll understand," Alex said encouragingly.
"She never told me," Kara said sadly. "Why didn't she tell me?"
Alex looked at Maggie for backup, but the detective shrugged, letting know that Alex was on her own with this one. "I don't know, Kar. But I'm sure she had her reasons. You should talk to her," Alex urged.
Personally, Alex thought it was the fact that Lena had an equally massive crush on her clueless sister, and didn't want to risk the friendship. Alex had never seen two people more oblivious to each other's feelings. However, as frustrating as it was to watch, it wasn't her truth to reveal.
Kara shook her head.
Her feelings were her problem to deal with. And now that she knew about them, she could work on fixing the problem. The first step to fixing a problem, was knowing it existed, right?
Kara soon discovered that whoever had come up with that phrase was, in fact, not right.
She had tried. She really had. The last thing she wanted to be was that person that made their friend uncomfortable with unrequited feelings. She had been on the other end of the equation more than once, and it was no fun.
She figured that since she was now aware of her feelings, she could get them under control without having to burden Lena with them, thus avoiding that painfully awkward conversation where Lena gently, but firmly told her that she saw Kara as nothing more than a friend.
As far as plans go, it wasn't elaborate, but Kara thought it was going reasonably well. Just last week she had managed to go an entire lunch without once taking her eyes off Lena's. Which, okay, may have been a little intense, and Lena may have looked at her a little oddly, but the point was that she hadn't once dropped her gaze to Lena's neck. Kara was counting it as a win.
So, Kara, emboldened by her success, had barely thought twice before accepting Lena's invitation to a charity function. Lena had to attend such functions regularly, and Kara had attended with her in the past. She just wanted things to be normal between them. Granted, this would be the first one since Kara learned of her true feelings for her friend, but she was confident she could handle it.
Her confidence, as it turned out, was misplaced.
Kara supposed that it was only fitting that Lena's dress was a deep, vibrant, green, because she was finding herself as powerless before it as she was before kryptonite. Or, more precisely, the neckline on said dress. It was far from inappropriate, but it was strapless, and it had a plunging neckline that was revealing more of Lena's skin than Kara was prepared to deal with.
The fact that she was pretty sure she had spotted another tiny mole on the upper swell of Lena's left breast was far from helping matters. Kara had been raised to be a scientist, trained in the arts of logic and extrapolation. If Lena had two moles, it was only logical to assume that she had more.
Kara bit her lip. Her mind suddenly awash with the possibilities.
Kara was only made aware of the fact that she had been staring, when Lena waved her hand in front of her eyes, clearly trying, and having tried, and failed, to previously gain her attention.
"You don't have to go do you?" Lena asked. On anyone else, Kara would classify the expression on the other woman's face as a pout. Except Lena Luthor would never pout. Lena may give a commanding glare when she didn't get her way in a meeting, or when a business deal wasn't going her way. Or maybe a look of mild disappointment when Kara forgot to stock her favorite brand of vegan ice cream (Kara blamed Maggie for introducing Lena to the monstrosity on game night), but a pout? Never.
Kara shook her head, clearing the fog from her brain, and reluctantly dragging her eyes up from Lena's neck. "Huh?"
"Is there an emergency? You were pretty spaced out. You usually only get that way when you are trying to concentrate your hearing on something," Lena elaborated.
Kara wasn't proud of it, but for a brief moment, she considered taking the out that Lena was offering. She had prepared for spending a few hours in her friend's company. Exchanging empty small talk with National City's rich and pampered. And maybe eating her weight in hors d'oeuvres.
She had been confident that she could keep her newly acknowledged attraction to her friend under control. If she could learn to harness her heat vision while going through puberty surely she could manage to not ogle her friend, right?
Kara blamed the dress.
"I'll understand if you have to go," Lena continued, trying her best to mask her disappointment. "The safety of National City takes precedence over my wanting to have someone to talk to that won't make me dream of throwing myself off the nearest balcony."
Kara frowned. She didn't like it when Lena joked about being in mortal danger. Especially when it involved falling, or being thrown, of balconies. And just like that, the decision was made. As if it had ever been in doubt in the first place. Kara's feelings were her problem to deal with. She refused to let Lena be punished because of her inability to control them.
"Nope, no emergency. I'm all yours," Kara replied brightly. Kara looked around Lena's entryway. The fact that she had barely made it past the front door before getting distracted probably wasn't a great portent of the night ahead, but Kara refused to admit defeat. "Did you want to grab a jacket? Or a wrap?" If her voice sounded a little desperate, well, hopefully Lena wouldn't notice.
Lena shook her head. "I think I'll be fine without one. It's such a nice night."
Kara mustered a smile, and nodded her head in agreement. It was fine. She could do this. She would just try to stand beside, or behind Lena at all times, blocking her view, and hopefully keeping herself from doing anything mortally embarrassing.
Like walking into a wall. Or, in her case, through it. Leaving Supergirl sized holes around National City was bad enough, if she started leaving Kara sized holes as well, even the generally oblivious citizens may start to connect the dots.
Kara stepped out into the hallway, waiting for Lena to close and lock her apartment door. She almost bit through her lip when she saw the back of Lena's dress. Or rather, the complete lack thereof.
Kara sent up a silent prayer to Rao, but she knew it was futile. Rao had forsaken her. She was doomed.
Kara managed to hang on for nearly an hour, before she had to excuse herself under the guise of wanting to grab a plate of appetizers. She wasn't sure if it was her new awareness of her feelings, or if she was just being paranoid, but Lena had seemed….extra handsy this evening.
Not that she was being inappropriate. Far from it. It was a hand on her shoulder as she introduced her to a business associate. A brief touch to her wrist to get her attention. A fleeting hand on the small of her back to help guide her through the crowd.
Innocent though they may be, they had stretched Kara's already frayed nerves to the breaking point. Which was why she was currently standing in a corner of the room shoving mini quiches, and tarts, and petit fours into her mouth at what most people would consider an alarming rate.
She thought the distance from Lena would give her a chance to collect herself, and it had, but she had forgotten one very important detail. Lena didn't tend to remain alone long at these functions. She may show little outward interest in dating, but that didn't stop the eligible, and some not so eligible, men of National City from trying their chances with the beautiful CEO.
Kara watched with a scowl as another physically flawless, and perfectly bland, specimen leaned down, entirely too close to Lena's ear in Kara's opinion, to say something to the brunette. Her scowl only deepened when Lena tilted her head back and laughed, swatting playfully at the man's arm.
Kara shoved three quiches into her mouth and chewed furiously.
Her spirits lifted fractionally when, a few moments later, she saw Lena surreptitiously scanning the crowd. Surrounded by National City's most eligible, Lena was looking for her. As difficult as it was to keep her eyes and hands to herself, Kara realized it was harder to watch other people put theirs on Lena in her absence.
Kara wiped her fingers on the small cocktail napkin, and picked up the glass of champagne she had grabbed for Lena when she went on her snack run. She squared her shoulders and made her way determinedly through the crowd.
Kara could have just announced herself verbally, but she guiltily stole the opportunity to feel Lena's skin, and placed her hand softly on Lena' shoulder to get the other woman's attention.
Lena turned at the contact, and smiled brightly. "There you are. I thought I'd lost you for the evening."
"Sorry, I got distracted," Kara apologized, handing the champagne glass to Lena. "I got you this."
"Thank you, darling," Lena said, taking the glass from Kara. With her other hand Lena reached up and brushed her thumb lightly over her chin, just grazing her bottom lip. Kara froze, eye's wide. "Crumbs," Lena said softly with a quick, knowing, wink.
Kara blushed hotly. Of course, of course, she was covered in the evidence of her snacking binge.
Kara started to step back, but before she could retreat, and put some much needed space between herself and Lena, the other woman looped her arms around Kara's and anchored her in place.
When Kara looked at her questioningly, Lena leaned in and whispered, "I don't want you running off and disappearing again. You're supposed to be saving me from this tedious twaddle."
"Sorry," Kara apologized. "I promise I'm all yours for the rest of the night."
Kara was pretty sure she imagined the smirk that flashed across Lena's lips at the statement.
The car ride back to Lena's apartment was unusually quiet. Kara sat next to Lena, looking pointedly out the window. A flash of motion in the periphery of her vision caught her attention. She glanced instinctively, watching as Lena crossed her legs, her dress rising to expose a tantalizing amount of skin. Kara quickly jerked her gaze away.
Lena sighed softly. "Have I done something to upset you?" Lena asked, worry lacing her tone.
Kara turned her head to look at Lena. "What? No! Why would you think that?"
"You've been off all night," Lena responded. "Distracted. Quieter. I feel like I must have done something."
"You haven't," Kara hastily assured her. The last thing she wanted was Lena thinking Kara's odd behavior, was in any way, her fault. Kara thought she had done a better job of hiding her feelings.
A faint frown marred Lena's brow. "Am I asking you to attend to many of these functions?" Lena worried. "I know they're dreadfully boring, and it's selfish of me to keep making you suffer through them. I hope you know that you don't always have to say yes when I ask you."
"I love spending time with you," Kara protested. "I-This doesn't have-" Kara shook her head. "I promise, it's not you."
Lena looked at her thoughtfully, head tipped slightly. "So there is something."
Kara bit her lip, realizing too late that she had confirmed Lena's suspicion that something was bothering her. "It's not a big deal," Kara dismissed.
"Kara," Lena placed her hand on Kara's knee. "Please. If something is bothering you, I want you to be able to talk to me." When Kara responded with only silence, Lena sighed, withdrawing her hand, and retreating into her corner of the car. Lena's jaw firmed, and she was now the one staring pointedly out the window.
Kara felt a pang in her chest; she had never wanted to cause Lena pain.
Kara worried her lower lip, her mind racing. Were Alex and Maggie right? Should she just tell Lena what was going on, and then deal with the fallout? Her fear was that revealing her feelings would change their friendship, but if Lena's stony silence was any indication, Kara may have already done that with her silence.
She knew how Lena felt about the people she cared about keeping secrets. When Kara had finally revealed that she was Supergirl, she had been afraid the other woman may never forgive her deception. But she had. Lena had been hurt, but in end, had appreciated Kara finally trusting her with the truth.
Kara was so preoccupied with her thoughts, that she didn't even realize the car had stopped until Lena cleared her throat.
"Thank you, again, for agreeing to accompany this evening. It made what would have been an otherwise tedious evening bearable," Lena said with a stilted formality that gave Kara's heart a pang. She hated when Lena retreated behind her emotionless mask, and she hated even more that she was the cause.
Kara swallowed nervously, not at all sure that she was making the right decision. "Will you come up? I think we should talk."
Kara tossed her keys into the bowl on the counter and walked over to her refrigerator. "Do you want something to drink? Something to eat? I have some leftover Thai."
Lena shook her head, arms crossed over her chest. "I'm fine." Lena glanced furtively around the apartment. "You said we should talk," Lena reminded.
Kara drew in a deep, steadying breath. "Right. Yeah. We should. Totally. Do you want to sit? I think the couch will be more comfortable. But we can stand too. Whatever you want."
"Kara, you're starting to freak me out a little bit," Lena admitted, the worry easy to read on her face. "For someone that insists whatever is going on is no big deal, you seem awfully nervous."
Kara rubbed her hands up and down her thighs. She could do this. She was Supergirl. She faced mortal peril on an almost daily basis. Even if Lena didn't feel the same, which, of course she didn't, she wasn't going to throw Kara out of her life. Maybe there would be a little bit of awkwardness, like when Winn had admitted his feelings to Kara, but eventually they had worked through it. They were fine now. Better than fine. Great even. She and Lena would get through it too.
"I just don't want to ruin anything," Kara confessed.
"I'm sure you're not going to ruin anything."
Kara laughed, a short, tight sound. "You don't know what I'm going to say, yet."
Lena sat down on the couch, patting the cushion beside her encouragingly. "Then why don't you sit down and tell me."
Kara nodded jerkily, walking over and sitting down.
Once seated, she glanced over at Lena, and the other woman's reassuring smile, even in the face of her own anxiety, gave Kara the courage she needed to start.
"First, I just want to say that this isn't something I've been hiding from you. At least not consciously. It wasn't something I was even aware of myself until recently." More than anything, she needed Lena to understand that she hadn't been lying to her. Not again.
Lena nodded. "Okay," she said slowly.
"I didn't even realize anything had changed," Kara continued. "If not for Alex and Maggie, I'm not sure when, or if, I would have figured it out on my own," Kara admitted, chagrined. It still galled her a little that it taken an intervention to realize her, now, painfully obvious feelings for her friend.
"Once I realized, I thought I could ignore it." Kara paused. "Well, maybe not ignore, but at least keep it under control. I didn't want anything to change. I still don't.
Which, I realize now, was probably overly optimistic. I've never been particularly good at hiding my feelings. Or so Alex tells me. She insists that I broadcast them like a neon billboard."
Lena smiled fondly, nodding her head. "She's kinda right."
Kara froze, her stomach clenching into a ball. God, had Lena already figured out her feelings? Had she just been too polite to say anything to spare Kara's feelings? Kara almost lost the nerve to continue, but Lena, looking at her with that gentle, caring expression, urged her to keep going. Now that she had started, she had to finish. No matter what the outcome.
"Right. Well. I still tried. It was going pretty well too," Kara insisted. "After a few weeks I thought for sure I had it under control. It made me confident. Too confident," Kara admitted with a shake of her head.
"What happened?" Lena coaxed, trying to encourage Kara to keep talking, even if she was still largely in the dark about what she was talking about.
"Your dress," Kara confessed, warmth heating her cheeks, eyes falling to her lap.
"My dress?" Lena asked, head drawing back in confusion. Whatever she had been expecting, it obviously wasn't that.
Kara nodded. "I was doing so well. When we had lunch last week, and you dropped that cherry tomato I didn't even glance." Kara wrung her hands together. "But then you showed up in that dress," Kara accused. "I'm only human, well, not, you know what I mean." Kara shook her head.
"I'm afraid I don't," Lena admitted after a brief pause.
"What?" Kara raised her head to look at Lena.
"Kara, you still haven't actually told me what this is all about." Hadn't she? Kara thought she had been pretty clear.
"Yes I did," Kara insisted.
Lena shook her head. "No, you didn't."
"I did." Kara was adamant. "I told you about how my feelings for you have changed. Well, maybe not changed. Looking back, I realize I've loved you for a long time. I just wasn't aware how I loved you, until Alex and Maggie caught me staring at your mole. Well, technically, they thought they caught me staring at your chest. But I wasn't! I wouldn't do that." Kara closed her eyes. "Gods, it was so embarrassing. I just wanted to forget about it. And I tried. I really did," Kara looked at Lena pleadingly. "But then," Kara waved her hand toward Lena. "You showed up in that, and I realized that I was just kidding myself. There was no way I was going to be able to hide my feelings.
"Which, I guess I was right. Since you obviously realized something was up, which is why we are having this super uncomfortable conversation." Kara chanced a glance at Lena and found the other woman looking back at her, speechless.
"I promise, after tonight, we never have to talk about this again. I don't want to make things uncomfortable, or weird. We can just try to forget all about this, and things can go back to normal."
Lena continued to stare at her, unblinking, and silent. "Are you mad? Please don't be mad. Say something. Please?" The longer Lena's silence stretched, the greater her concern that she had just ruined everything grew.
"You love me?" Lena finally croaked out.
Kara blinked. She hadn't meant to tell Lena that. "Oh, I didn't- That is, I- I just wanted to- Yes." Kara may not have exactly been planning to tell Lena the true extent of her feelings, intending to stop with the fact that she had a crush on her friend. However, she wasn't going to lie about it either.
"And you thought that would upset me?" Lena's expression was frustratingly blank, and Kara couldn't get a read on what she was feeling. A quick listen revealed her heartbeat was racing, but that could be from fear, or anxiety, or a desire to escape this awkward situation Kara had thrust them in to.
"Uhmmm...Yes?" Kara wasn't entirely sure the question wasn't rhetorical, but she figured better safe than sorry. "I know you don't feel the same way. And that's totally fine." Kara held up her hands. "Not that you need my permission for your feelings. Obviously. I just- I don't want you to think that I expect anything. Because I totally don't. Like I said, after tonight we can forget this whole conversation ever happ-"
"Kara," Lena mercifully cut off her rambling. "Stop talking."
Kara snapped her mouth closed, nodding in understanding.
Lena drew in a deep breath, looking at Kara quietly, clearly trying to gather her thoughts before speaking. Kara bit her lip, doing her best not to fidget while she waited. She had said her piece, and now it was Lena's turn. Kara just hoped she let her down gently.
"You're an idiot." Kara flinched. Okay, well, apparently Lena was going with the tough love approach. Before she spiral too far, and figure out a way to return herself to the welcome abyss of the Phantom Zone, she felt Lena's hand slide into hers, tangling their fingers together.
"We're both idiots," Lena continued softly, her thumb brushing over the back of Kara's hand. Oh. Lena scooted over on the couch until she was pressed against Kara's side. Oh!
"Are you saying that you…" Kara let the question trail off, too afraid to finish it out loud in case she was reading Lena incorrectly. Lena bit her lip, nodding her head. "Oh, wow, that's- I never thought that you would- Maggie and Alex said you might, but I didn't want to get my hopes up you know?" Kara rubbed her hands over her thighs, not really sure where they went from here. "Should we go on a date? Unless you don't want to? We don't have to, if you don't-"
"Kara," Lena pressed a finger to Kara's lips, "stop talking."
Again, Kara nodded her understanding. Unlike before, Lena didn't sit quietly gathering her thoughts. No. This time, Lena knew exactly what she wanted to say. Or, in this case, do.
Kara may not have been aware of her feelings for Lena long, but in the weeks since she realized, she had thought about kissing Lena. A lot. Like, a lot, a lot.
When Lena's lips pressed to hers for the first time, anything she had previously imagined flew out of her head. As a writer, Kara liked to think she had a way with words, but in this moment, she found it impossible to describe the rush of feelings coursing through her body. Instead of trying, Kara decided to just forget about trying to capture the moment, and simply enjoy it.
Kara curled her hands into the couch cushions, not trusting herself to touch Lena. Not right now. Lena didn't have any such reservations, her hand reaching up to cup the side of Kara's face, her fingers playing lightly with some of the hair that had escaped Kara's bun.
Kara leaned into the contact. Just because she didn't trust herself to touch Lena, didn't mean she couldn't enjoy Lena's hands on her.
All too soon, though in truth, Kara had no idea how long it had actually been, regardless, it was still too soon, Lena drew back slightly, breaking the contact. Much to Kara's pleasure, she didn't go far. Instead, she dropped her head onto one of Kara's shoulder, her fingers continuing to play idly with the ends of Kara's hair.
"So," Lena said softly.
"So."
Lena paused for a few beats. "My mole?"
Kara's eyes slammed shut, and she dropped her head back on the couch. "Oh, Rao," she groaned. "I was hoping you hadn't heard that bit."
Lena laughed, rubbing her hand soothingly across Kara's upper chest. "Oh, darling, I heard everything you said."
Kara's eyes popped open, and she looked at Lena intently. "I really like that."
"What's that?" Lena asked, her eyes crinkling at the corners. "Me calling your darling," Kara shivered delicately. Lena had called her darling in the past, but she was putting a new emphasis on the word that was entirely new. "Or this?" Lena raked her nails playfully over Kara's collar bone.
"Both," Kara croaked.
Lena hummed. "So noted." Lena continued the gentle caress. "However, don't think I've forgotten about the whole mole thing." Kara whined, squirming uncomfortably into the sofa cushions. Lena laughed, reaching down to pat her hand against Kara's stomach. "Fine. I'll take pity on you. We don't have to talk about it now, but we will talk about it."
Lena looked at her with a raised eyebrow and Kara nodded. She couldn't refuse Lena anything.
Sundays had officially become Kara's favorite day of the week. It wasn't because Sundays meant all you could eat brunch at Noonan's, though that was a nice perk. No, Sundays were the one day a week that Lena allowed herself, and therefore by extension, Kara, to sleep in.
Kara started this particular Sunday, by pulling the covers back, exposing Lena's bare back. She pressed a kiss to shoulder, another to the center of her spine, the edge of her rib cage, her lower back.
"Kara," Lena grumbled sleepily, "we've talked about this."
Kara paused in her ministrations, resting her chin on the swell of Lena's ass. She placed a soft kiss to the dimple at the base of her spine. "I can't help it, Lena," Kara defended.
"I just don't get the obsession."
Kara slowly reversed course. Placing a lingering kiss on Lena's lower back, rib cage, the center of her spine, and her shoulder, before draping herself over her girlfriend's back.
"They form a perfect pattern for the constellation for Lorra, the goddess of beauty and love. It's a sign, Lena." Kara burrowed her face into Lena's neck, placing one last kiss on her exposed throat. To the one that had started it all.
"A sign of what? That you're a weirdo?" Lena asked, her face still buried in the pillow.
"That we're meant to be together," Kara protested with a pout.
Lena turned her head. "They're moles, Kara. I'm worried that you may be reading too much into their significance." Lena's tone was deadpan, but Kara could see the mirth behind her eyes.
Kara pinched her lightly on the side, causing Lena to squirm deliciously beneath her. "We agreed no kink shaming. Or do you want me to mention your affinity for a certain uniform?"
"Truce, truce," Lena promised, a blush staining her cheeks. Kara didn't know why Lena found her...appreciation...of Supergirl so embarrassing, but Kara wasn't above using it to her advantage.
Lena relaxed back into the bed, a contented sigh escaping. "What time are we supposed to meet Alex and Maggie for brunch?"
"Not for hours yet," Kara assured her her, placing a kiss to the nape of her neck. "Did you want to go back to sleep, or…?"
Lena shifted her body sinuously. "I think I'd rather see you work up a sweat."
Sundays were definitely Kara's favorite day of the week.