Flower In The Snow

Pairing : 1x5x1
Rating : PG-13
Warnings : Yaoi, mild angst/romance
Summary : Wufei wakes up in the night to find Heero in the garden, waiting.

A/N : Just a simple ficlet for my favourite pairing. Hope you enjoy!

He awoke suddenly, blinking in the darkness as the world swam into dim vision around him. He wasn't sure yet what had awakened him, but his body was already moving, one hand reaching out to cast around the futon. The space beside him was empty; this made him turn his head, searching with eyes now.

The glow from the single shaded lamp hanging from the rafters tinged the room golden in between the shadows.

The futon was still warm, indented in spaces where a head had lain, a limb had strewn carelessly in sleep. He studied the uneven surface for a moment, mind absently joining all the little dips together like he was a child again doing 'connect the dots' patterns when he should have been studying scrolls, forming a mental outline of the man that had slept beside him.

The wild mess of hair, sharp cheekbones, strong jaw, lean powerful body that curled into a near-ball when asleep...and the little things that could not be imprinted into the futon. Eyes the colour of the deepest ocean, growing darker in emotion, lightening in a smile. Lips that tightened in silence yet were always warm on his skin...

It was getting cold.

Wufei rose onto his elbows and peered towards the end of the room. There was just enough light from the lamp to illuminate the large, silk-screen, wood-piped doors. They were barely enough to keep out the chill, and the cold was already dragging cold fingers over his skin.

Getting onto his feet, he wrapped himself in a thick robe.

A soft rustle as he slid between the silk screens. The moon seemed brighter tonight, its glow radiant enough to rival the lamp-light of the room, making Wufei feel like he had stepped from a bath of gold to silver.

A small garden that was sprawled just beyond the silk lay open to his gaze. The fragrance reached him a second later; the scent of growing things and the crisp tang of the night breeze.

His eyes adjusted to the play of diffused light and shadow on the patio, and the dark figure that took shape in his vision. He could just make out the outline of the man; his legs crossed, head lowered. His heartbeat skipped.

"Heero," Wufei stepped forward, uncharacteristically hesitant. He sensed the pain from the other man, saw it in the tremor across strong shoulders. "What's wrong?"

The man stood up suddenly.

"What - wait - " A sharp intake of breath as Heero lurched into him, then swung away before he could catch him. He almost stumbled as he stepped off the wood and onto the earth.

Raising his head, Heero stared into the ink-black sky. Wufei gazed in the same direction, seeing only nothingness. Yet Heero still watched like he was in a trance, eyes wide and glazed.

It was cold. Wufei could feel the iciness fully now, and it reached right into his heart as he watched Heero in his silent dance in his own nightmare. Six months, five days, and things had not changed since the beginning. He had thought that maybe - just perhaps - Heero's return was a start of something. He hadn't expected anything from the former Perfect Soldier, and so was startled when he was offered the man himself. The transition from comrades to friends and to bedmates was so blurred he could no longer re-define any boundary in their melded lives.

But now, it seemed everything was getting clearer with each day when words grew lesser between them, and each night that Heero stole away for a little longer from their shared futon.

Wufei turned his head and stared dully at the lamp-lit chamber, before looking back at Heero. "I have work tomorrow. I'm going back to bed. Don't stay up too late. You have a long day tomorrow at the..." He trailed off, before shaking his head. "Don't stay out too late." He moved to leave.

"Wait."

Wufei wasn't even sure he had heard that whisper, so hushed it was. But already, his traitorous body was responding. He turned, his breath catching sharply in his throat and his chest tightening.

Heero hadn't move a hair from his intense contemplation of the night sky.

Perhaps he had heard wrong after all.

Then, from the vast expanse of heavens above, a sprinkle of white spiralled down in a gentle waltz.

Snow. Like something white and soft and sweet that had tumbled from the hands of some playful god.

"It was like this, then." Heero was speaking, quietly, face still cast upwards. "When I returned the flower to her."

Flower. Her. Wufei remembered suddenly, his mind piecing together the snatches of unconscious mutterings from Heero's nightmares.

I killed her...her dog...just watched...flower...her gift...I...gave it back...
I killed her...

A sudden image of Heero, just a child but unable to cry, laying a flower in a blanket of snow in memory of the girl that had given it to him.

"Heero..." Wufei whispered.

The man remained still, unreachable, for a moment, before he lowered his head slowly and looked at Wufei.

Above them, the snowflakes kept tumbling down, dusting white over the earth. They fell on Heero, melting like tears on his face.

Blindly, Wufei moved from where he stood, covering the distance between them in strides until he reached Heero.

Heero said nothing, only tilted his head. Wufei met him halfway into the kiss. In the past, they had kissed out of raw hunger, anger or just need. Like they were fighting again in the war, throwing everything they had at each other. Those were heady, intoxicating, harsh caresses of lips that made them feel like they could just possess each other just through mouths alone. Now their kisses just tasted of each other and nothing else.

They went back to the chamber after that, Heero leading the way.

The screens were not quite fully closed, leaving a slice of snowflake-studded sky between them, and letting the chill curl into the room and prickle their skin as they took away each other's clothes. The cold was forgotten, chased away by the warmth of skin flushed on skin. The shadows made everything dim, but it heightened every touch, every kiss and feverish whisper between them.

The velvet darkness blanketed their thoughts. The moonshine was the only light in the chamber that night as it played over shifting, moving, entwined bodies.

fin
December 2005

note : The scene of Heero laying a flower for the girl he had killed is taken from the Episode Zero manga.