Sunshine Smiles.
/
She's in the air that he breathes, the smiles that he smiles, the songs that he sings, the melodies that he plays, the dreams that he dreams, she's everywhere and yet in reality she dances just out of his grasp, while his fingers frantically try to hold onto wisps of her that disappear much too soon.
In school sometimes he see's her walking down the hallways, a spring in her step and a smile on her face and he wonders, will she also let him in on this secret of happiness and sunshine like smiles which are permanently etched on her face? Because he wants to live in that world of her where life flows like a gentle stream, rippling over stones and curving lazily around bends. He contemplates asking but decides against it. His inclusion into that world will not give it the same charm she weaves around it, it just might pollute it and he doesn't want to ever wipe that sunshine like smile off her face.
/
At first she scares him because he's got a healthy self-preservation instinct that kicks into over-drive whenever she's around. To date, he's been cracked on the head by cricket bat, elbowed in the stomach with a hockey stick, injured on his foot by a bowling ball, poked on the behind by a fencing sword but honestly speaking the injuries pale into insignificance when she's around and instead he finds himself dazedly listening to her frantic apologies and wondering if there's a musical lilt to every word she says.
And when she becomes slightly more confident around them and sits with them and talks with them, he finds himself absorbing every little word and noticing every little detail from the soft curve of her cheeks to the dainty tip of her nose to the light pink of her lips.
He looks at her animated face when she talks and smiles because there's nothing better that seeing her so happy.
It makes him happy.
/
He'd always thought the girl he'd fall in love would be blonde, beautiful and confident and he thinks that maybe it would Stella because Stella is sophisticated and he's suave and don't sophisticated and suave go together?
But somehow the girl in his dreams is not blonde and not beautiful- classically speaking, she's beautiful in the way that she is natural and pure, and she's got shiny, silky brown locks of hair and she's herself, not sophisticated. And her name is Macy.
He falls in love with this girl and her smile and her eyes and her laughter and everything about her.
She makes him feel, she makes him live and she even fills that tiny little hole inside of him, the existence of which he always denied because lonely is feeling he doesn't like to think about. Maybe it's not loneliness per se but it was a lack of something and he feels better knowing that, or telling himself that Joseph Lucas has got it all, fame , fortune and happiness that just wont fully fill the void.
/
There are days when she just sits with him and talks about nothing and everything and he feels like he has all the time in the world to savor these moments which are so few and far in between and pass much to quickly for his liking. These days he feels like he has it all, the entire world's happiness in the palm of his hand with a liberal sprinkling of her sunshine smile.
He wants to keep it forever, tied in a silken little bag.
And there are the other days when he misses her and he longs for those moments when she talks to him exclusively.
It feels like there are dark clouds hanging over him which only her sunshine like smile will send away.
And there's enough gloom to send around the world.
He doesn't like it because days without her feel empty and meaningless and he once again feels like a lost little boy of eight, who desperately needs his stuffed penguin to give him comfort.
/
Sometimes he wants to tell her that he loves her and her smile and her clumsiness and her enthusiasm and everything but then at the other times he holds back. They are young and there's a world to be explored, a life to be lived and memories to be made and he doesn't want to weigh her down with something he can't comprehend himself.
So he decides to wait so that one day they'll both be old enough and he'll her about love and her sunshine smile and a little bag full of happiness and maybe she'll pepper his face with kisses and call him Joseph and tell him she loves him.
Until that day, he'll see her sunshine smile and dream of a world, where she brings him a kind of happiness that he can forever hold in his palms.
I just wanted to try my hand at JONAS. It's a little choppy but I hope it's decent. :)