I wrote this ages ago and I kinda liked it. Looking back at it now it seems to happen too fast but still. It's 1039 words. I finally decided it was time for me to post it.
Fanfic for the Competition by: The Next Marauder
Criteria:
- Must be over 700 words
- Must be a One Shot
- Must involve Lily hitting James where it hurts (can be by accident or on purpose)
- Must include the words: Buttocks, television and Animagus
Sigh, why does she have to be so beautiful? James Potter mused to himself as he watched Lily Evans talking with her friends. She's so… lively, vivacious, cute, funny, stunningly beautiful, perfect, intelligent all of those fall short of her.
"Oi! Prongs!" Sirius Black shouted as he strode into the Great Hall, followed by Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew. Half the female population swooned as Sirius Black, James Potter's best friend and class clown walked past them with his dark hair and even darker eyes he fitted the description of 'Tall, dark and handsome.' "Still mooning over Lily-Flower?" he asked grinning.
"What?" James asked, suddenly paying attention. He had been watching Lily's flaming red hair get tossed idly over her shoulder and admiring how her green eyes shone in the candlelight.
"Do we even need the answer to that Pads? Of course he's still mooning over Lily," Remus said, he was another of James's friends.
"That's all he ever does now," Peter sighed, he was the fourth member of their group of friends.
"No, I don't," James argued, running a hand through his black hair the way he did when he was nervous.
"Sorry mate but you do," Sirius protested.
Side by side, Sirius and James looked almost identical. If it hadn't been for the fact that they had different coloured eyes and that James wore glasses they could probably be mistaken as twins.
"You're a right arse," James muttered.
"I think you're right I do have a nice set of buttocks," Sirius said, pulling out a mirror to examine his rear end. Aside from being the class clown he was also a prankster and a bit of a narcissist with a slight bit of an ego.
Remus laughed into his hands, shaking his head at the idiocy of it all, "This could almost be a television show. I can just imagine it, 'In the Life of the Marauders."
"Television?" Peter asked.
"A Muggle thing," Remus answered.
"Oh, okay," Peter still looked confused.
"Why don't you just go ask Lily out?" Remus asked to James.
"Already tried a billion times before. Remember last year?"
"Yeah she slapped you across the face and told you that you were a bloody git and that she'd go out with you only when a week had three Thursdays in it," Sirius added, laughing.
"And remember in November?" Peter asked.
"Yup, she totally whipped your arse that time. She punched you and broke your nose, the day before the match between Slytherin and Gryffindor. I think you spent a day in the hospital wing."
"I did, for such a beautiful girl she sure packs a powerful punch," James sighed, "But I like her for it. In fact I don't care if she punches me a thousand times I'm still gonna like her."
"I think this is a case of love-sick James," Sirius sighed.
"More like Lily-obsessed James," Remus muttered back.
"So when's the next full moon Moony?" Sirius laughed at his pun.
"Ha, Ha very funny. Get yourself a lunar chart," Remus answered back.
"Why should I you're like a personal lunar chart. If you're grumpy a full moon's coming and if you're pale the full moon is going," Sirius answered back.
"Thanks I'm so glad you can laugh at my expense," Remus said dryly.
"Chill Moony, you know Sirius he just likes to tease everyone," James tried to restore peace.
"Being Animagus is so fun!" Peter quipped up.
"Shh!" the three other boys said at once, "No one is supposed to know, it's against the law."
"What's against the law?" Lily asked, unbeknownst to the Marauders she had come up behind them.
"How much I love you?" James barely managed to say, "Would you like to go out with me?" James had put on an almost cocky smile.
"You egotistical, arrogant jerk, you bloody git!" Lily yelled and kicked him hard between the legs and then fled from the scene of the crime.
"Ouch that's gotta hurt," Sirius commented, grinning. He had enjoyed the show.
"That is so… painful," James gasped between each word.
"But you enjoyed every minute of it, didn't you Prongsie?" Sirius teased.
"I thought I told you not to call me Prongsie," James muttered, but Sirius had already skipped away, laughing at today's events.
"How am I to get her to like me?" James complained, "She always avoids me and calls me an egotistical, arrogant jerk. She hates me and all I do is like her and ask her out every few days."
"Maybe you are a bit arrogant," Remus supplied, "Maybe you need to be a bit more romantic and less show-offy."
"Maybe…" James said, not convinced.
"Look maybe I could talk to her and make her not hate you. We are sort of friends," Remus offered. Poor James was hopelessly smitten and he couldn't do anything right to make her like him.
"Would you please?" James almost begged.
"I'll try, I can't promise anything," Remus answered.
Later that day Lily came up to James, "Remus um… told me that you actually liked me," She began softly, "Is it true?"
"Yeah," James said back, "It's true."
"I just thought you were teasing and joking with me. I didn't think you actually liked me," Lily had this pretty little half-smile on. James was thinking how pretty it made her look.
"I did like you, I just didn't have any way to express it. I'm sorry for being an egotistical and arrogant jerk."
"I'm sorry for kicking you and punching you," Lily licked her lips nervously.
Next thing James knew he had stepped forward and kissed Lily on the lips. It was exactly how he had imagined it and even better than it. Words could never describe it, just as they could never describe Lily who was kissing him back.
"Well… wow," James said after he pulled away.
"I could say that too," Lily smiled and pulled him back to her. Watching from the top of the boys' stairs Remus, Sirius and Peter giggled softly.
"You owe me a sickle," Remus told Sirius.
"Why?"
"Because they got together this year. You said they wouldn't till next year."
Sirius debated for a moment whether or not he could cancel it, because after all Remus had interferred, then decided against it. "Fine, Fine," Sirius grumbled as he placed a silver coin in Remus's hand, "Come along Peter, I'm sure the happy couple does not want a stalker."
The three boys headed up to their dorm room to talk about another prank they had planned for Snivellus.
Well I hoped you liked it. Please comment on it.
Oh and a bonus secret: if you think sick mindedly the title is a pun. Some of you might have already figured that out of course, my devoted fans are all so smart wipes tears from eyes