# Notes from original author Marie: This story is extremely AU, and even more TWT. I'm going to have D and his kind age "normally" until they hit eighteen, at which point it slows to a crawl. This is consistent with the fact that in the epilogue of the manga, twenty years after the rest of the series, "New D" appears to be about eighteen. D is fifteen. Leon is sixteen (about eight months older than D). Deal with it.

I did not make up the shisa. It's an actual mythological creature. Erm... I believe that was a contradiction of terms, but oh well. They're supposed to be wards against various evils, and generally come in pairs. They look kind of like a cross between an oriental lion and a dog.

Glossary:

Decima (mythological figure) the Roman version of Lachesis, one of the Greek Fates

Lachesis (n.) a genus of pit viper

Raion (n.) lion

Shishi (n.) lion

Shizumaru (v.) quiet down

I know that Japanese is not D's native language, but do you know how hard it is to find a dictionary that gives you Romanized Chinese translations? Pretty damn tough.

"Blah" is normal speech

/Blah/ is the Sorting Hat or other telepathy

'Blah' is thoughts or response to telepathy, or a letter.

"Blah" is Parseltongue

"Blah" is any other language

D's voice is androgynous in the manga. In the chapter "Deep," someone mistakes him for a girl despite having heard his voice. I hate the anime version, so I'm going to go with the manga on this one.

Disclaimer: I don't own them. Now READ!

#Notes from co-author: Um... yeah, you'll see my notes in what were formerly footnotes but are now parenthesised ANs.

D sat quietly in his lonely compartment, with only a pair of small shisa pups and a hatchling pit viper that was coiled loosely around his neck underneath his cloak to keep him company. He looked up as the door slid open and three boys walked in. One was thin and appeared to be rather sophisticated, while the other two were muscle-bound and dumb-looking. The shisa in his lap began to growl, but he patted it on the head. (Which head?)

"Shh, Shishi-chan. Shizumaru," he whispered. He turned to look at the boys, donning his polite-yet-empty china doll smile. "Hello. May I help you?" he asked in his practiced 'helpful shopkeeper voice' that his grandfather had taught him to use when dealing with humans. (AN: "Dealing with Humans 101" by Sofu D. If you like that, you'll love our sequel, "Killing Humans 101" by Papa D)

The sophisticated-looking one stepped forward. "My name is Malfoy. Draco Malfoy. " (AN: "The name's Bond. James Bond.") "These are my friends Crabbe and Goyle. I'm a prefect, and I'm patrolling the train." He paused. "I don't think I've ever seen you around here before, and you're too old to be a First Year. What house are you in?"

"I am a transfer student from Asia, so I have not yet been placed in a house," he explained. "You may call me D." (AN: Death, destruction, and other highly pleasant D words!)

One of the dumb-looking ones, Goyle, snorted. "What kind of name is that?" he demanded. (AQ [Author's Quote]: "What kind of a name is Pugsley?" "It's Slavic for 'stomach pump.'" Though in this case, I think D is a letter of the alphabet. I could be wrong, though.)

D's smile quickly turned to a slight frown. "It is the name that my father gave to me, and his father gave to him, and so on for seven generations," he said quietly. (AN: Damn, these people have no imaginations.)

Draco frowned, looking at him closely. "Why aren't you in uniform yet?" he asked. D was wearing a plain black cheongsam with a black shirt and slacks underneath.

D's smile returned. "My cheongsam technically fits the dress code, so technically, I am in uniform." (AN: So technically, he got you on a technicality. Technically.) The other shisa began to bark loudly at the three boys. "I am afraid that I must ask you to leave. Raion-chan does not seem to want you here." He turned to the lion/dog. "Raion-chan, shizumaru." The shisa quieted immediately.

A short time after the three left, a tall blonde boy with blue eyes peered through the compartment window, then walked in confidently. He stopped suddenly when he saw the snake poke its head out of the hood of the cloak. He had his wand out in a second.

"How'd a snake get in here?" he demanded.

D looked confused for a moment. "Oh! You mean Decima!" he said finally. "Don't worry. She won't hurt me."

The boy raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean? Are her poison sacs removed or something?" he asked.

D looked appalled. "Of course not! I'd never do something like that to one of my pets. Now put that wand away." He stroked the snake's head with one finger reassuringly. "It's alright, Decima. I won't let the mean human hurt you," he whispered in a hiss.

The boy's grip on his wand tightened. "You're a Parselmouth!" he accused. (AN: And you're a dickhead. We all have our little problems.)

D looked confused. (AN: Funny, I never thought D looked anything like Alice. [Inside joke]) "Pardon?"

"You can talk to snakes!" the boy accused. "That's a Dark wizard thing!" D suddenly began to laugh.

"What the hell is so funny?" snapped Leon.

D finally got his laughter under control. "The unknown spawns fear. Fear spawns hate. Hate spawns prejudice. Snakes are cloaked in mystery, and thus they are feared. Snakes are feared, and thus they are hated. Snakes are hated, so they are rejected and labeled as 'Dark.'" (AN: You got a whole Domino thing goin' on there. Gonna call for pizza? Order me some too while you're at it.) He smirked. "It is not the talent that is good or bad, it is what you do with that talent. Isn't that right, Raion?"

The shisa barked and wagged its tail, panting happily. (AN: I'd be panting happily if I were that close to D, too.)

The boy lowered his wand and thought on this for a little while. (AN: Ooh, must have been a real struggle.) "I suppose you got a point there. Harry Potter's a Parselmouth, and he's no Dark wizard..."

"I'm glad we've come to an understanding," D said with a smile; a real, genuine smile that no human had ever had the privilege to see on his face before. (AN: Where else would they have seen it? Because I can't really imagine D smiling out his butt. But then again, you never know. Oh quiet, you stupid computer box.) "My name is D."

The boy smirked. "The name's Leon."

After Leon had sat down and they'd talked for a few minutes-–Leon explaining that the compartment his friends were in was too crowded for him–-the trolley finally arrived. D bought half the cart.