Round One
(Note: this fan fiction is a dialogue-type story. With all humour in mind, this story doesn't follow the Sailor Moon storyline. Also note: no offence to people with acne or body acne.)
SERENA: Gosh, school is so boring and this math homework is even worse! Why do we have to have homework?
RAE: I dunno…why do you have to be such a crybaby?
S: Me? A crybaby? At least I'm not a snotty, spoiled brat!
R: Ugh! You b…
S: Hey! Remember this is rated PG.
R: Oh f…
S: Rae!
R: FIDDLE STICKS! FIDDLE STICKS, see I wasn't going to curse, fiddle sticks…
S: Okay. Anyway—oh, Rae…
R: …
S: Rae? Heellloooo?
R: WHAT!?
S: Sorry, I was just wondering…
R: Hurry Serena! Algebra doesn't wait!
S: I am hurrying. Gotta calculator?
R: Who do I look like? Miss School Supplies? Get your own calculator, I need this one. Use your brain for once.
S: Ooookay…hmm…553 times 603 divided by 4 square…let me figure this out in my head…553 times 603…3 times 3 is 9, 3 times 5 is 15, carry the one over the other five…
R: Shut up, Serena! Here, there you go, the calculator!
S: Why thank you my dear friend.
R: Your welcome, Serena. Yeah, okay, easy on the buttons. Just need to press the 'equal button' once.
S: OOPS! I just did 553 times 630. Silly me. My mistake. Goodness gracious, how dumb can I get? 5-5-3-times button-6-0-3-equals-3-3-3-4-5-9-now for 4 square-4 times button-4-equals-16-now-3-3-3-4-5-9-divide button-16-equals-2-0-8-4-1-point-1-8-7…
R: Can you shut up please?
S: Can I? Or will I, you mean?
R: Holy s…
S: Remember, rated PG, little kiddies reading. Hey children *waves like a maniac* hello!
R: Who are you waving at? Oh! Hi, hey you, staring at the screen. Gosh, this is embarrassing…
S: Retard…back to the fic. Come one, Rae!
R: Wait a second—I'm just fixing my hair now—ooh—ick!
S: Ick what?
R: Ick that! Over there!
S: What? You just found your face! Congratulations on just noticing how ugly you really are.
R: No, stupid, ick I got a zit! That ick!
S: Zit?
R: You know, pimple, annoying like you…
S: I know what a zit is! Just that you never had a pimple in your life.
R: Little do you know. My whole back is covered with acne. Or shall I say, 'backne'.
S: Gross!
R: I know. I use a body wash with acne fighting ingredients but nothing works.
S: Poor you. No bikinis this summer then.
R: Yeah, and for you too!
S: How?
R: You're so fat! All those doughnuts and sweets you eat. Fatty…
S: At least I'm not covered in body acne. They should change your name to Sailor Body Acne. Your attack could be "grease ball of fire" or "bacteria blast!"
R: Yeah, okay. Let's go call up Naoko Takeuchi* and ask her if that would be a-okay with her.
S: Let's not. We really should be going. Those kiddies need their rest. Okay, kids—nappy time.
R: You so need a life.
S: I know. Tomorrow I'm going to Lives'R'Us. Bye-bye.
R: Yeah, whatever. Bye hunns! *blows a kiss!*
*Naoko Takeuchi is the creator of Sailor Moon. She wrote all those awesome comic books.
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