Cas sat next Dean as the impala sped down the highway. It had been a long day and he was grateful to be going back to the motel. For the past week they had been hunting a pack of shifters, and today they had finally able to take care of them.
The hunt had been tough and it had taken a lot out of them. It seemed as if the hunt was never going to end. They kept having to go from one place to another, always just short of catching them. At one point, Dean got injured and Cas thought it was all over. Somehow, he quickly took two down and Sam distracted the others as Cas made his way to Dean. Using his grace, Cas concentrated and was somehow able to heal him in time.
Things like this worried Cas. He didn't like to see Dean hurt. He didn't like that he was almost too late to save him. Cas thought about this kind of stuff a lot lately. How both Sam and Dean acted with almost no concern for their own lives. He didn't like it at all. Their lives were already difficult enough and he couldn't imagine what it would be like to lose Dean.
Looking over at Dean, Cas felt his heart ache. He didn't know what he would do if he ever lost Dean. Just thinking about it made him feel as if he was on the verge of tears.
"You alright Cas', Dean asked, looking over briefly.
"I am well," Cas lied.
Dean knew something was wrong, but clearly Cas didn't want to talk about it. He felt bad he didn't like when Cas was worried or sad. He prided himself on not being a sentimental guy, but there were just some things even he couldn't help. Dean wanted Cas to be happy and for everything to be alright. Reaching his arm over, he placed his hand on Cas's leg, squeezing it briefly and letting it rest there for a bit.
Cas's breath hitched at Dean's touch. He looked down at Dean's hand on his leg and couldn't help but smile softly. Such a simple action helped make him feel a bit better. 'He's still here,' Cas thought, 'He'll be fine.'
Eventually they made it back into town and to their motel. As the car slowed to a stop, Cas unbuckled his seatbelt and got out. Dean opened the door to their room and the two walked in. Sam had stayed behind for a while to close off a few loose ends and they would be back for him the next day.
"I'm gonna go take a shower, ok," Dean said walking towards the bathroom, removing his jacket and shirt on his way.
Cas nodded and sat down on the bed. He couldn't help but stare as Dean removed his shirt. Cas had seen him like this before, but every time his heart beat faster. He groaned clenching his fists into the bed sheets just before he heard the door to the bathroom close and the shower start.
"Why did you do this to me God," Cas asked as he thought about how he felt. "This isn't supposed to happen," he continued. He felt that somehow it was wrong. He didn't think Angels were supposed to feel this way. Not about anything or anyone. But somehow, he did. He had prayed many times about it and always felt like he had been reassured by God that it was ok, but Cas still couldn't help but worry.
He was afraid. Afraid of what it meant, what Dean would think, what he would do if he lost Dean. For all Cas knew, Dean was completely oblivious and Cas wasn't even on his radar. That was the most logical thing, he thought. But there was also the chance that Dean just wasn't into him at all, that there was no possibility of it ever working out. That scenario scared Cas a bit, whenever the thought came up, he tried to ignore it.
Cas felt his heart ache as he thought, and continued to think about how easy it would be to lose Dean. He was the only thing Cas really cared about, and if he were to lose that, Cas couldn't even imagine what that would do to him.
The shower turned off and after a few seconds, he heard the door open. Turning to look, Cas saw Dean with a towel wrapped around his waist, hair dripping wet. Cas took in a sharp breath at the sight and felt his skin flush. He was only reminded more of how much Dean meant to him and felt his blood run faster.
"After I get dressed, I'm gonna go get something to eat," Dean said, making his way over to Cas.
"Fine," Cas mumbled softly.
Dean tried to ignore Cas's passive answers. He had noticed he was acting distant for the past few hours, ever since they had finished the hunt. He didn't really want to make a big deal out of it, but he also wanted to make sure Cas was ok. "Hey man," Dean said, standing in front of Cas, "I know something's wrong, please talk to me."
"I told you before, I am fine."
"Bullshit, now tell me what's bothering you."
Cas could tell by the look in Dean's eye, that he wasn't going to leave until he got what he wanted.
"I'm worried," Cas responded, looking down.
"About what," Dean said as he sat down on bed next to Cas.
Taking a deep breath Cas continued, "Losing you."
"What do you mean, I'm fine. You know that."
"Do I though? You are fine now, but you were not during the hunt." Cas said looking at Dean raising his voice, "You almost died today. I was barely able to get to you in time. And this keeps happening." Dean could see how worried Cas was and could see the anger building inside Cas, "What am I supposed to do if I lose you. I can't just do this by myself. Not anymore. I need you Dean, I'm scared."
"It's fine Cas," Dean said placing his hand over Cas's, "I worry the same things about you. But I know I won't lose you, it just won't happen. I'll do anything to prevent that, and I know you will too." Dean felt his heart racing as he spoke. He didn't like to see Cas in pain, and he didn't like thinking about them being apart. He knew how he felt about Cas, but he knew an Angel could never feel the same.
"I don't want to lose you," Cas replied as tears filled his eyes. He brought up his hand to Dean's shoulder and squeezed tight.
Dean' she heart raced as he felt Cas's hand over his shoulder. He squeezed his hand around Cas's saying, "You won't."
Cas looked up as Dean and stared straight into his eyes. He felt peace. He felt like everything really would be ok. He felt love.
Dean couldn't help but smile as Cas looked up at him. He wanted everything to be ok, he wanted Cas to be happy.
Cas leaned in closer his eyes locked on Dean's.
Dean's heart raced as he looked into Cas's eyes. For a second, he panicked not knowing what to do. But suddenly he felt his blood rush to right his body and he felt himself leaning closer to Cas.
Cas felt Dean's lip slowly touch his. He felt a surge rush through his body. The kiss deepened and Cas opened his mouth a bit responding to Dean. He felt Dean's tongue slide against his and he moaned at the touch.
After a moment, they pulled away both breathing shallow breaths.
"Dean," Cas whispered, looking into Dean's eyes. Suddenly he felt Dean's hand on his cheek and he was pushed onto the bed with Dean on top of him.
"Dean," Cas breathed before Dean's lips were over his once again.
Dean began kissing Cas passionately playing with his lips. Cas felt Dean's tongue glide across his and felt his body become bore warm. Sliding his hand up Dean's back, Cas gripped his shirt and pulled him closer. Dean began sucking on Cas's bottom lip before trailing his kissed down his neck. Letting out a moan, Cas felt Dean sucking on his neck causing his hips to jerk up in response.
He didn't know exactly what his body was doing or why, he just knew he liked it. Lacing his fingers through Dean's hair, Cas began pulling it lightly. Dean let out a gasp before covering Cas's lips once again with his own. Cas felt a heat in his groin and felt his body urging him to press himself closer to Dean. As he ground his hips into Dean's, pleasure rushed through his body and his head shot back as he let out a moan.
Dean sat up and began unbuttoning Cas's shirt and removed his tie. Cas didn't know what to do so he put his hands on Dean's hips and let him continue. Dean slowly began licking Cas's nipple causing the Angel below him to squirm while letting out small gasps and moans.
"Dean-" Cas managed to breath out as Dean's lips and hand began working his nipples more and more.
"I- somethin-gs happening,"
Dean sat back up looking terrified. "Shit! Fuck I'm so sorry," he cursed, "I shouldn't- I'm so sorry."
"No, Dean," Cas replied taking Dean's hand in his own. "It's fine, I just-," Cas paused for a minute trying to figure out what to say, "I feel- tight..."
"What do you mean," Dean questioned.
"My pants, they're... It feels good but also it hurts. I- I need-"
Before Cas could finish Dean cupped his hand around Cas's erection ripping his palm into it.
Letting out a moan as his eyes shut closed Cas responded by grinding his hips up into Dean's hand.
"Dean-" Cas breathed.
"What," Dean smirked.
"I- I need you to," Dean ground his hand down once more causing Cas to lose coherency.
Sitting back, Dean asked Cas to sit up. Dean's towel was almost off at that point but he pushed it off to free himself.
Cas watched as Dean's towel fell and he saw Dean's erection. He didn't quite know where to look so he found himself glancing all over Dean's body as he felt his cheeks flush.
"Shit," he said, "is this what you want?"
Cas responded by kissing him firmly. Feeling his heart race and his body fill with courage, he reaching down to cup his hand around Dean's dick. Dean gasped and ground his hips into Cas's hand. Cas pulled away and removed his pants and boxers before lying down on the bed and pulling Dean on top of him.
The two lay there exploring each other's mouths. Cas found his hands lost in Dean's hair letting his fingers filed throughout it's softness. Dean had his hand exploring Cas's chest, feeling every curve of muscle under his fingertips.
Cas gasped as he felt Dean slide his finger over his nipple. Noticing Cas's reaction, Dean repeated the action causing Cas to lose himself in Dean's touch. As their bodies moved together Cas could feel the new sensation of Dean's flesh against his own. He liked feeling the soft warm skin against his own.
Dean wanted to be closer to Cas, as close as possible. He began grinding his hips into Cas causing the Angel to cry out. Cas felt his body fill with pleasure upon feeling Dean's erection against his own. Unable to wait any longer Cas breathed out, "Dean, please."
Dean slowed down and allowed himself to look into Cas's eyes.
"I need you, now," Cas ordered.
Dean sat up smiling, and moved down Cas's body. He let his hands slowly trace over Cas's torso, lightly playing with the smooth skin below. He rubbed gently as he made it to Cas's hips, causing Cas to push his hips up. Slowly, Dean let his fingers glide to Cas's dick wrapping his fingers around it. Cas let out a cry of pleasure upon the touch and Dean slowly stroked him up and down. Soon, Dean moved his head down and flicked his eyes up to Cas.
Cas saw the look of hunger in Dean's eyes and felt himself tense up. Dean wrapped his lips around the head of Cas's erection and flicked his tongue over the tip. Dean was a bit caught off guard when Cas pushed his hips up causing Dean's mouth to suddenly be full. However, Dean just laughed around Cas's dick sending waves of pleasure throughout Cas as he began moving his mouth up and down.
Cas gripped the bed tightly as he felt Dean's warm mouth around him. He could feel pulses emanate from his groin traveling throughout his body.
Suddenly Dean's lips left Cas's dick causing his heart to sink just a bit. But as soon as they were gone, Cas felt them come back. However this time he felt Dean's tongue on his hole slowly licking. As his fists wrapped around the sheets, his back arched up. Dean moaned into him as he pushed his tongue in a bit causing Cas to moan loudly.
Cas felt himself being overwhelmed with pleasure as Dean kept working there.
Dean pulled his head up and looked up at Cas. He could see Cas was struggling to keep control over himself and Dean smiled knowing he was in charge.
"I'm going to put my finger into you ok," Dean asked.
Cas just nodded and he felt Dean's finger against his entrancement felt it enter slowly and gasped as he felt pain emanate from where Dean's finger had entered.
"Are you ok," Dean asked stopping his movement.
"Yes," Cas breathed out.
Dean pushed his finger in even more and began moving it out. He did this over and over getting Cas used to his presence. Soon Cas began feeling pleasure from Dean's touch. He found him pushing his hips closer to Dean in response.
"I'm putting in a second finger," Dean warned before Cas felt the second finger slowly slide in. This time he clenched his mad as he felt pain pulse through him.
"Relax Cas, you need to relax," he heard Dean say as he felt his squeeze his thigh reassuringly.
Dean's fingers went in and out and began scissoring to prepare Cas for Dean. Cas resumed rolling his hips into Dean's touch as Dean moved deeper and deeper. He felt himself once again losing control. He felt Dean moving his fingers faster, deeper and stronger.
Suddenly he felt Dean hit something inside him causing Cas to gasp as a wave of immense pleasure rushed through him. As he felt this sensation his wings burst out and fluttered momentarily.
Dean looked up shocked and confused.
Cas looked around and saw the look on Dean's face. Cas was just as confused but he remembered something he had heard the other Angel's mention centuries before.
"I- I was told that this sometimes happens whe-en Angels..." Cas tried to say, embarrassed by his lack of control.
Dean smiled up at him and said, "You're beautiful Cas."
Removing his fingers slowly, he pushed Cas's legs apart more and moved himself closer. He took a few moments to take a closer look at Cas's wings. He let his fingers glide across the black feathers as he watched Cas stir beneath him.
"I think you're ready," Dean said as Cas wordlessly replied by nodding his head. Dean lifted up Cas a bit at the hips letting Cas's legs wrap over his and around his back.
Cas watched as he felt Dean's dick line up at his entrance. Dean looked up at Cas for permission and Cas have him a look back that said 'yes'. Cas felt Dean's warm length enter him and he felt a slow burn like he had felt before. He knew Dean was taking his time, trying to be careful for Cas.
Cas felt like his body couldn't take anymore just before Dean stopped. He began pulling out and then pushed back in. At first his movements were slow, but they soon began picking up speed. They soon developed a rhythm and continued for a few minutes feeling themselves moving around each other. Cas felt himself losing control to the pleasure. He began involuntarily bucking his. Hips up begging for more. Dean wrapped one hand around Cas's erection and began pumping.
Taken aback by this, Cas had to grab onto Dean's shoulders. He felt Dean going into him harder and harder. He felt his body warm as heat pooled in his groin. Head grinned as he moved in and out grasping Cas's name every once and awhile. Cas felt himself coming undone as he heard Dean calling his name. Dean continued thrusting and Cas found himself losing his control in the moment.
"C-as" Dean grunted out, "I'm gonna- inside, is th-at ok?"
Cas paused up into Dean's thrust as he moaned out "Please."
Dean began moving more sporadically and harder as he reached his climax. Cas felt Dean hit that spot over and over again and felt himself become overwhelmed by pleasure. He heard Dean yell out his name as he thrust hard squeezing his hand around Cas's arm. The look on Dean's face sent Cas over the edge. He called out Dean's name as his hips thrust up and he felt pleasure pulsing through his erection and throughout his body. He felt Dean filling him as they both road out their orgasms together.
As his heart began to settle he saw Dean looking at him smiling. Dean leaned down and took Cas's lips with his own. The kiss was deep and slow. Cas could feel Dean pouring his emotion into this as he kissed back. After a bit, Dean pulled up and slid out of Cas. Taking a nearby blanket, he slowly wiped of this and Cas's chest. After he was done. He laid down next to Cas and Cas turned to face him.
"Dean," Cas said softly, "That was..." He smiled not knowing what to say. Dean smiled back kissing his softly and letting his hand cup Cas's face and his thumb trace his cheek. Cas felt his heart swell as he looked on at Dean.
Dean felt himself full of emotion, full of happiness. He felt his heart race as he looked at Cas and saw a look of pure happiness in his face. He slowly stroked Cas's cheek before he folded once again and kissed his slowly. After he pulled back his heart racing faster he heard Cas say, "Dean, I-"
Dean interrupted him blurting out what he had been feeling for so long, "I love you!"
Dean felt his face blush at his words. He looked at Cas's face for some kind of signal. It this face was blank as ever.
"I love you Cas, A-and I have, for a while. I just didn't think you, and I didn't want to ruin everything like I always do. But I couldn't help it, I've wanted you for so long now."
Dean looked down as he began to worry. Cas's expression was still the same and he hadn't said a thing. After a few long moments Dean said, "Dean felt Cas's hand glide through his hair as he pulled him and hissed him. Cas pulled back looking at Dean, "I love you Dean. I love you so much." Dean felt his heart swell at Cas's words and he couldn't help but smile. "I've always loved you, from the very beginning, it has always been you."
Dean kissed Cas hard this time wanting to let Cas know how much he loved him. Dean was happy, he was so happy. He felt his body become overwhelmed with a warmth as he felt Cas's tongue glide over his. Dean pulled Cas closer as their kiss deepened. He let his hand slide through Cas's soft hair before pulling away. "I love you," Cas said once again. Dean smiled and kissed him softly before pulling him. He help onto Cas tight and let his fingers glide through Cas's wings and slide across his black feathers. He felt Cas purr into his neck as he moved closer. Dean thought about how lucky he was, how blessed. As he held Cas in his arms he smiled nuzzling his head into Cas's hair as he whispered, "I love you."