This is crack Hetalia. So... You've been warned

After every concert, there would be an after party to congratulate the great, mediocre or the poor performance from the band members. Arthur never looked forward to these little get occasions. You see, he wasn't a band member. He was just a sort of friend of one of the member's, Francis . Well, really, he was friends with everyone, but Francis a bit more than the rest. So, Arthur was just the one who'd help out, and really, he loved it.

But tonight, he wasn't in the mood to really help out tonight, so he decided to sneak back to the tour bus and escape to his room that they had given him. He would occasionally share with Gilbert whenever he wanted a quick fuck he decided the couch didn't met his high standards.

"Damn it." Arthur sighed, putting his hands into his pockets. "It's freezing tonight." He finished, bawling his hands up in the warm, insulated pockets. He stopped walking, hearing something behind him. He turned around, seeing a tall, dark figure jogging towards him. "Ah, don't kill me!" He cried, taking his arms up, hiding himself from the figure that was bolting towards him.

"Oh, you're not Gilbert!" The figure said, stopping. He was close; Arthur being able to smell the Polo cologne on the man. "Do you know where he is?" The figure asked. Arthur let his shield down, looking up at the person. He sighed.

"He's probably at the after party." He said, turning around, walking closer to the bus.

"Aren't you going to the after party?" The man continued, but Arthur shook his head, stopping his walking once more, but this time, not turning around. "Why not?"

"They're boring to me; since I'm not in the band, I'm just a friend, no one really pays attention to me." Arthur said, continuing his walking to the bus. It was right there, too.

"Wait!" The man said, making Arthur become somewhat flustered; he wanting to escape the cold. "If you want, you can go to the after party with me, and I'll pay attention to you." Arthur stood still, he smiling. "I'm Alfred, by the way." He added. Arthur turned around, smiling at him. He could have sworn he's seen and heard this name and this face. And with this boy he assumed he was, he remembered having a little crush on him in his high school years.

"I'm Arthur." He said, looking down at the ground. He took his hand out of his pocket, pointing to the bus. "It's too cold to go to the party; I think it's outside. " He said, looking back up at him. "Do you want to go to the bus and hang out?" He asked, blushing a bit.

"Sure!" Alfred said, getting by his side and walking with him.

Once they reached the bus (that wasn't even five feet away from them), Arthur opened the door, allowing him access into the lavish bus that was built with great quality in mind. Arthur lead him to his room, and then he shut the door.

"What do you want to talk about?" Alfred asked, watching Arthur flop himself down on the bed, he closing his eyes. And after he did that, he sat back up, taking his coat off, he now only wearing a white button up shirt. He threw the coat onto a little chair that sat in the corner, he laying back down.

"I don't know." He said, kicking his leg over the edge of the bed. "You can sit, you know." He added. He then felt Alfred shift the bed, he sitting where he kicked. "You look awfully familiar." Arthur admitted, sitting up. "Did I go to school with you or something?"

"Yeah, I did, actually." Alfred said, looking over at him, smiling. "I was good friends with Gilbert, that's why I was looking for him." He said, looking down at the bed sheets. "I thought I'd surprise him by coming out to his concert, you know." He replied, Arthur shaking his head.

"Oh, really? Huh, that's interesting." He said, laying back down. "Gilbert should be back here in an hour or two; looks like you're stuck with me." He laughed, but Alfred chuckled a little.

"Is that really a bad thing?" Alfred said, looking down at Alfred, his eyes half lidded. Arthur blushed, looking back up at him.

"I guess not." He replied with a shaky voice, looking over at him. Alfred scooted closer into the bed, making the side of his leg hit the side of Arthur's. "Alfred, you can lie down next to me if you'd like, that is." He added quickly. Alfred smiled, inching over to him, laying down next to him. 'Are we going to hook up!?' Arthur thought, his blush going over his cheeks. 'I hope so,' He continued, turning his head over to look at him. He was looking right back at him. He quickly turned his head back to it's first positions. 'He's hot as fuck, damn.' He finished in his mind.

Arthur turned his head back over to look at Alfred, he still looking at him. He blushed, feeling something possess him to move his lips closer to his, landing a kiss on his lips. He pulled away, Alfred smirking at him.

"Are you flirting with me?" Alfred asked, making Arthur give him a strange look.

"I just kissed you; obviously." Arthur replied. Alfred nodded his head, crawling on top of Arthur, kissing his cheek. "A-A-are we going to be doing it?" Arthur asked, making Alfred laugh. "This is a serious question!" Arthur shouted, looking up at him. "I don't have any lube!" He continued, Alfred still laughing at him, kissing his lips once more.

"Don't worry." He said, kissing down his neck. He pulled away, moving up to his ear. "Blood, sweat and tears work just fine." He whispered in Arthur's ear; making him panic once more. "It's a joke... I think it is. But either way you'll be fine, I've done this many of times before." He said, Arthur giving him another look. "I'm clean; I promise."

"Ok." He said, but then he got another idea. "If we are going to do this, who'll be top and who'll be bottom?" He asked, but Alfred looked at him with a smirk.

"As if you'd be the seme; the great hero much like myself is obviously going to be me."

"But one of the problems with this ship is that the fangirls are starting to get the damn hint that you're always on top; I ran a fucking empire. I'm sure that if I want my dick sucked, it can be sucked at this point." Arthur snapped back, Alfred giving him another look.

"Fangirls? Empires?" Alfred started, sitting up, straddling him. "You're talking crazy; what are we; in some fan fiction that's being written by a teenage girl or something? We're not in Hetalia anymore." He said, inching down to Arthur's ear, kissing the lobe. "We're in the real world; we can't be talking like we're on drugs anymore, ok?" He said, Arthur shaking his head, agreeing.

"Well, ok." He said, wrapping his arm around Alfred's neck, pulling him to his lips. "Kiss me, now." He said, Alfred landing a kiss on Arthur's plush lips. He hit Alfred's bottom lip with his tongue, asking him to part his lips even further with his dick tongue, wanting to feel his wet muscle coat the inside of his mouth. And once Alfred got the hint, he slithered his tongue past his lips, entering into Arthur's. The two taking part in a loving kiss, a passionate and lustful experience.

Arthur sighed pleasurably once he felt Alfred snake his hands down to Arthur's lower area, he feeling the outline of his hardened erection through his black jeaned pants. He unbuttoned these black jeaned pants, slipping his hand inside them, feeling his member through his boxers.
He then slipped his hands in his boxers; now, there was skin on skin contact.

He then slipped his pant's off along with his boxers, taking both of his hands and holding it in between his hands like you would with Play Dough, rolling it in between his hands. He was now in between Arthur's legs, looking up at him while he blushed a dark red, feeling his member being rolled in between the hands of a master. He must of had much practice with Play Dough in pre-school, of even in his teen years.

"Do you like that, baby?" He asked, looking up at him with half lidded eyes. He looked at Arthur's eyes, seeing that one of his green orbs were going cross eyed.

"Oh, yes!" He shouted, bucking his hips into his hands. "I think I'm about to explode!" Arthur moaned, feeling his hands going faster.

"Call me Play Dough god." Alfred said, kissing the inside of Arthur's pale leg. "Do it!" He commanded, Arthur groaning as he felt his ending coming soon.

"P-Play Dough G-God!" He cried, he feeling his seed leave his body, going onto the hands of the god that had done this to him. "A-A-Alfred.." He said, looking down at him. "Are you hard as Kiku is when he watched tentacle porn?" He asked. But Alfred didn't reply, only taking his sticky hands and placing them on Arthur's face, rubbing off his release on his own face. He took some of the seed that was on his thumb, rubbing it on one of Arthur's thick eyebrows, making it spike up and look even more strange than before.

"Look! Hair Gel!" He said, doing it to the other eyebrow, they looking the same.

"You never answered my question." He said, letting Alfred continue playing with his seed on his face. "Are you hard or not?"

"I-I don't know." Alfred said, taking the last little bit of cum on his hand, whipping it in Arthur's blonde hair. "I can't tell."

"Let me check." Arthur said, reaching his hand into Alfred pant's. But, Alfred pushed him away.

"No!" Alfred cried, pushing his arm away. "D-Don't go in my pants!" He cried, denying Arthur access into his jeans.

"Oh, I get it..." Arthur said, looking down at the bed sheets, his face starting to become crusty from the his own semen. "You don't get turned on by me." He said. Alfred looked down at him, sighing deeply.

"Do something sexy, ok?" He said, taking off his pants, showing him in his American flag boxers with an eagle printed on the opening.

"What do you call sexy?" Arthur asked, looking down at him, his eyebrows still spiked up. "Do you call this sexy?" He said, kissing on Alfred's chest, he sighing with pleasure, taking a hold if his back, holding him close. He pulled away, laying on his chest, looking up at him, smiling. "I take it that you do." He said, continuing kissing his chest.

Arthur then, after awhile, reached down to his groan area, checking to see if he was able to get hard. But, much to his dismay, it was limp.

"What is wrong with you!?" Arthur shouted, sitting up straight, crossing his arms as he looked over to the wall, Alfred sitting up quickly, trying to comfort him. He hugged him from behind, nuzzling his head in the crook of his nook. "Why can't you get it up!?

"I want to get it on, I want to make you horny, and really, I did that, but it just won't go up." Alfred admitted, kissing his ear lobe. "I really do want to fuck you like no tomorrow, trust me, it's just..." He trailed off, looking down at Arthur's chest. "I don't know."

"Go on your phone and Google ways to get yourself harder, ok?" Arthur suggested, becoming flattered with Alfred's nice words. He too wanted to be fucked in the ass, or maybe, this time have sexual relations where, for once, he was the giver, not the receiver. But, Arthur couldn't get the kind words out of his head. "You really mean that?"

"Mean what?" Alfred replied, going on his phone, typing in Google.

"You want to fuck me hard in the ass." Arthur said, rewording it. Alfred looked over at him, smiling, nodding his head. Arthur felt like this was love.

"SlimJim32 says we're all stupid for looking this up." Alfred reported making Arthur sigh.

"This is no time for games, Alfred!" Arthur shouted. He sat on the edge of the bed, his arms crossed as he steamed off towards the wall. "I'm horny as shit and you're just sitting there like 'I'm not hard, I can't get hard' and all that bullshit!" Arthur said, turning around looking at him, his face looking like a sunburn victim's from the flakes. "I want to be fucked; no, I want to be on top." He said, getting closer to Alfred. "It's always been my dream to be on top, to be giving it, and to control it." He said, looking into Alfred's blue eyes. "Alfred, please, I don't care if you have a good time; I'm only concerned about myself. " He said, taking his pale hand, placing it on Alfred's shoulder. "Let me fuck the shit out of you." Arthur said, and Alfred was in.

"You're such a romantic." Alfred said, getting under the covers, opening the covers up for Arthur to get under with him. And once he was under the covers with him, he shut the covers up, letting them be the only ones in the sheets. "Maybe this'll make me get it up." Alfred said, looking at him.

Arthur was excited; he was finally on top. He would finally be able to say he wasn't fucked in the ass, but now, was THE ass fucker. He couldn't wait to tell everyone he wasn't bent over a desk; he wasn't slammed on the counter top; he wasn't rammed in the shower; and for once, he finally wasn't being in the middle of a three way. He now identified himself as a man.

He positioned himself at his entrance, waiting for the right moment to enter into his (loose?) hole. He felt himself ready; so, he moved his hips outward, ready to slam them in.

"Arthur!" He heard Gilbert call out, knocking on the door. Arthur knew he was the type of person to knock and come in. But, Arthur knew that there's a special place in hell for people who do that, but at the moment, he didn't want him to go to hell just yet; he was too busy trying to be a king and fuck Alfred.

oh n0

The door opened up.

Gilbert saw everything; Arthur's semen covered face; Alfred laying underneath him; and Arthur about to pass out with joy. Gilbert knew this only meant one thing;

Massive butt fucking.

"Oh! Gilbert!" Alfred said, jumping out of the sheets, his massive, not even hardened member dangling in the thick air. "How's it been, bro?" He said. Gilbert laughed his signature laugh, coming over to give Alfred a high five.

"Woe! I haven't seen you in forever!" He said, looking down at Alfred's member. "Wow! It hasn't changed one bit, huh?" He said, touching it with his index finger. "So, I see he was fucking you? What a switch up!"

"Nah, bro," He started, pointing towards Arthur. "He was about to, but you walked in." He said, laughing, they two waling over to the door, Alfred still naked.

"Oh, want me to leave?..." Gilbert said, pointing back to Arthur. Alfred shook his head.

"Hey! Alfred!" He heard everyone cheer and then a few claps. "Who's up for an orgy?" One called out, and then everyone cheered. Arthur made a little noise, trying to cheer along with them, wanting to be apart of the orgy. "No, Arthur!" He heard Francis shout back, making Arthur fall weak.

"I think it was his face." Alfred said, making Arthur fall even weaker, Gilbert saying 'yeah' in response.

'I used to love him...' Arthur thought, falling to the sheets, humping his bed slightly with his hardened member.

All Arthur wanted was to not be thought of as the baby anymore. He was a grown ass man that had ran an empire. Yes, it did fall, but hey, you still get fish and chips so it didn't fall completely. England has many great things like those double decker busses, the French fries that are actually called chips there and not fries, and of course, how could we forget The Queen of England? Arthur knew that to represent his people, to assert his dominance over the rest of the world was to stop being thrown of desks and fucked vigorously. He knew what he had to do;

Fuck those who fucked him in the ass.