OK so if you are reading Story of the Caged Bird. I am truly sorry. And an update is coming I promise. Truth is that I couldn't get through the chapter without having this burn a whole in my psyche. So…I caved and wrote this. Don't worry though, Story of the Caged Bird takes priority. Mkay?

I don't own OUAT.

Chapter 1. Pilot

Regina waddled into the small convenience store. One hand sat in the small of her back with the other rubbing her swollen belly covered by the white maternity shirt. She motioned over to the tall transparent refrigerator, keeping a watchful eye over the slim dark skinned man behind the counter. He seemed to not be paying much attention to anything, slumped over flipping carelessly through a magazine. The brunette opened the fridge to remove a bottle a water than walked over to the aisle containing miscellaneous junk food. From chips to candy and the ever popular sunflower seeds.

Brown eyes glanced back at the man who was still looking through the magazine. Taking her chance she picked up a couple bags of sunflower seeds that rattled loudly as she stuffed them into the pockets of her maternity pants.

That seemed to catch the man's attention as he was now looking her way. "Can I help you find anything miss?" He proceeded to close the magazine and grazing his eyes over the brunette, settling at the rounded midsection.

"I'm fine." she answered.

After a few moments he resumed his casual reading. Seeming to think that a pregnant woman wouldn't be of any harm.

Regina slowly moved to another section of the aisle lingering purposely as she eyed a small bag of sour patch kids. Emma's favorite. A small smile graced her face as she thought of the blonde. They had been together for as long as she could remember. If there was any way for the two of them to be closer they would be fused into one. Tanned hands reached out conspicuously shoving the bag into her pocket.

The store owner than rounded from behind the register. Seeing him in the corner of her eye Regina quickly uncapped the bottle of water and doubled over as if in pain; spilling the water onto the floor. "Ah…" she groaned, shutting her eyes tightly.

The dark skinned man picked up his pace then, "geez, miss are you ok?" he stood next to her placing his hand onto a tanned shoulder.

"Yes," she breathed, "I'm...ahhh," she yelped in pseudo pain. Clutching the man's arm with a vice grip.

The store owner yelped too as his heart beat widely in his chest, fully understanding the severity of the situation. This woman was about to have her baby. Right here, in his store. "No...wait…just," he scrambled trying not to sound rude about not wanting to be a part of childbirth for a baby that wasn't even his. "Can you hold it?" He asked, as if the brunettes belly was full of urine rather than a growing human.

Regina shot him the strongest glare she could muster. An inward form of glee passed when beads of sweat formed over the dark skinned man's brow. Her grip tightened, "no I can't fucking hold it you idiot! Just...get me to the door."

The store owner looked around half hoping that someone else would miraculously show up. Saving him from the surreal situation. He looked down at the woman who was bent over in pain, her head turned to the side to glower at him. Noticing he hasn't moved since the brunette gave her request, he reached out to drape one of her arms over a dark shoulder leading her to the door. "Ok just...don't…just…keep your knees together!"

"It's a baby…dick." She insulted. The two moved together, Regina sporadically grasping at the man's shoulder for good measure, along with a few grunts. She really needed to sell the false labor. Their entire plan depended on it. It took them nearly two days to get everything right and she would really hate for it to be spoiled due to poor acting skills.

As the two approached the counter conveniently located near the door. The brunette screamed particularly loud crouching down again. Almost bringing herself and the man to the floor.

"Oh…lady…what the fuck is happening? Keep holding it were almost to the door." he pleased exasperatingly. This man seriously didn't want this baby to be born here.

"I…ahhh," she screamed again.

"Damn it…tell your kid to wait a fucking second." He helped lower the brunette to the floor in front of the counter. The store owner stood in front of Regina leaning back on the palms of her hands.

"Obviously I am having difficulty with that!" she spat.

The man put his hands up in surrender. "Look…can you call someone to come get you?" he asked pacing nervously.

"Yes," she panted, "call my girlfriend …she'll come to get me." Her features twisted with fictitious pain.

"Your…your girlfriend?"

Regina glared again, "did I stutter?"

The dark skinned man rubbed his hand over the top of greasy black hair before blowing out a breath. "Whatever...I don't fucking care…just...stay here."

The brunette gave him a look that seemed to say –where the hell am I going-. After giving the man a fake number she watched as he zoomed out of the store. Quickly correcting her features she reached into her bra and pressed the number 5 before hitting the call button. "You have three minutes, go." She flipped the phone closed before stuffing it back into her bra. Tanned hands reached under her shirt undoing the straps of her fake pregnant belly, releasing it from around her back.

Seconds later Emma walked into the store instantly spotting her girlfriend on the floor. She smirked, "a little dramatic don't you think?"

The brunette rolled her eyes before roughly tossing the imitation belly towards the blonde, "shut up, you have less than two minutes."

The fare skinned woman held on to the cushion before hopping over the counter and standing in front of the register. She tried to pull it open but it wouldn't budge. After trying a few buttons she looked at the brunette still sitting on the floor. "It won't open," green eyes looked over the register again. "Fuck…Regina you have to buy something for it to open unless you have a key."

"Well buy something then," the brunette stated annoyingly.

Emma looked around the counter, "what do you want?"

"What?"

"If we're gonna buy something then it might as well be what we want."

The brunette reached over to the front of the counter grabbing a snickers and throwing it up at the blonde, "here."

Emma looked over the candy bar, "why didn't you grab the kit Kat..." she whined.

"It doesn't matter, just take it."

"Fine." The blonde scanned the candy bar under the red laser light and hit the 'sell button'. The register bottom draw shot open revealing the draw full of money. She reached over the top of the fake belly opening the Velcro patch shoving the money inside.

The brunette looked down at her watch, "30 seconds Emma, hurry up."

Quickly, Emma used her gloved hands to lift up the tray empting the stacked bills hidden underneath and stuffing them in the pouch. She pulled the Velcro cover closed and tossed the cushion back to her girlfriend before closing the register and exiting the store.

With a practiced speed she placed the belly back under her shirt and strapped it to her body. Just as she was able to pull her shirt down the store owner returned from using the payphone. Clearly upset about having to leave his store unattended for that time. Somehow the stores landlines stopped working all of the sudden. Forcing him to use the payphone on the corner.

The man looked down at the brunette who rubbed her belly. The breathing seemed to have slowed. "I couldn't reach your…friend," he stated clearly uncomfortable. "Is there someone else?"

Before Regina could answer Emma busted through the store door letting it slam behind her. Green orbs caught sight of the brunette on the floor and she quickly ran over. Pseudo panic stricken across her face. "Baby are you ok?" She questioned kneeling in front of her girlfriend. Completely ignoring the dark man, who didn't seem to mind at all. He simply was happy that this woman got here to take care of this. But wait? How did she know the woman would be here? He inwardly shrugged it off. Who cares as long as his store floor stays baby free.

"I was having contractions," Regina answered looking ashamed. These two have practiced this bit over and over again. It was almost as believable to them as it was to the other person occupying the store.

Emma helped her girlfriend off the floor, "what? Why didn't you call me? You been gone for an hour." She grabbed a tanned arm helping her to her feet.

"I left my phone," she answered sheepishly.

The blonde noted the look. And frowned in return, "are you still getting them?" she asked rubbing the belly of money.

"No…they've slowed down." The brunette held onto her girlfriends arm as they headed towards the door.

"Good let's just get home to grab your bag and we'll go to the hospital, ok?"

Regina nodded. The couple completely ignored the store owner who seemed to be shocked yet slightly discussed by their interaction.

As the women exited, someone else walked into the store. The new customer walked straight to register looking to buy a snickers bar.

Emma and Regina walked hand and hand. A boastful smile on the both of their faces.

"We deserve a fucking Oscar," the blonde gloated.

"We? I did all the work." The brunette added playfully.

"Oh bullshit it was a team effort."

"As always," Regina answered smoothly. They had been at this for a while. Pretty much ever since she was 18 and Emma was 17, a time when their relationship started to cross over the line of friendship. She remembered the first time they had stolen as a team. Their Bostonian foster mom didn't believe in feeding the 'delinquent'. A name given both to herself and the blonde after separately getting caught stealing from the same drug store. Perhaps it was that coincidence that made them decided to work together.

It was a late night, both tanned and pale stomachs were growling. Emma had suggested going into the kitchen to steal all the ingredients necessary to make a sandwich fit for the two of them. For most people this wouldn't be an issue. But to two orphans living with a border line abusive foster mom. It was a dangerous mission. Even then the two came up with Regina being the one to cause a distraction while Emma made away with the food.

That night the two had bonded over a simple ham and cheese sandwich. Thoroughly impressed with the skill set of the latter. As time grew by their plans became more and more intricate. The brunette being the brains behind each one and Emma being the one to carry through. Of course there were things each of them knew more than the other. Always taking the liberty of teaching their knowledge come the necessary time and accepting the information ego free. It's what made them such an unstoppable team.

The blonde reached out to rub her girlfriend's belly. "How's our baby," she joked.

Regina giggled, "nice and full." She smiled as she watched Emma slowly leaned over to connect their lips, stopping their current stride. As they disconnected again the brunette spoke, "maybe we should get this back home."

The blonde showed a cocky smirk, "or do you just want me to get you home."

A seductive grin. "Maybe…" she feigned innocence.

Pale hands reached down to lace with tanned ones as they resumed walking.

"HEY!"

Emma quickly turned to spot the previous store owner moving at a fast speed. His face framed with fury.

"THIEVES!" He shouted.

Clutching more firmly onto her girlfriends hand the duo picked up the pace of their walk. Regina tried to run but Emma held her back.

"What are you doing?" She nearly whispered.

The blonde kept looking forward as she spoke, "there are lots of people here. We can't run just yet. They won't know we were involved if we look casual."

Brown eyes looked back at the still sprinting man, fist high in the air still shouting words of rage. "Emma he's going to catch us."

"No, he won't." She spaced out the words lowly. "I'll tell you when to run."

Regina could feel the sweat forming in her hand. What the hell was Emma up to? They should be running. Clearly this man is ready to beat them senseless. Their current gait turned into a speed walk. The man's voice became louder as he began to catch up. "Emma." The brunette warned.

"Wait." The blonde answered.

The man grew closer and Regina looked up at her girlfriend. "Emma…"

"Wait…" she trailed. Green orbs caught sight of the nearing ally way. Fingers laced together tighter as they rounded the corner into the dark ally. "Now," the two took off. Emma in the lead pulling her girlfriend who was lagging behind due to the extra weight strapped across her abdomen. Puddles of murky water splashed up under their feet. The long secluded walls encasing them in darkness save for the few scattered beams of sun. Their hands never parted, content on running together like thieves in the night. A wall of silver came into view and the running slowed.

Their breathing was heavy from exertion. As they neared, a silver wired fence blocked them from the other side. The two stopped in front of it.

"Emma what are we going to do?" The brunette asked through panted breath.

"What do you mean? We've climbed fences before." The blonde asked confused.

A tanned finger pointed to her rounded stomach, "yes, but I never had a pregnant belly strapped to me. I can't do it with this."

"Oh fuck…" apparently the two hadn't thought much about that factor. Green orbs scanned the ally. She noticed a large green dumpster and the ladder of a rusty fire escape hanging just out of reach. "Ok look," Emma stated hurriedly, "I'm gonna lift you and you'll climb on the dumpster and jump over."

"What!? Do you want me to break my neck!?" Regina nearly shouted.

"COME BACK HERE YOU THIEVING BITCHES!" Both women jumped at the voice of the seething store owner who had rounded the corner and was running towards them.

Emma looked at her girlfriend with wide eyes. "Look," she pointed past the fence, "there's a pile of garbage bags. You'll be fine if you land on that." Deciding there was no time for reassurance, the blonde quickly grabbed Regina, hoisting her up to grab the ladder so she could mount the top of the large green garbage bin.

After making sure she was successfully on top, Emma started to scale the fence with practiced speed. Just as Emma hoped over she witnessed Regina jump and land directly into the pile of black garbage bags. One of which happened to be covered with some kind of moisture.

The brunettes face was covered with disgust and anger. Emma reached out to grab her girlfriend's hand. Successfully pulling her out of the garbage and picking up speed; rounding the corner out of harm's way.

Emma sat on their less than impressive couch sipping a beer and watching television. Regina sat in the space meant to be kitchen, clad in a t-shirt and underwear. Her hair was still slightly wet from the shower she insisted on having the moment they returned to their little shack. If one could even call it that.

It was more like an oversized box. Everything sat pretty much on top of each other. The kitchen which consisted of a two eye old stove and one cabinet ran right into the living room space. Separated by an area rug that was already there when they moved in. There was a small wooden table, which the brunette was currently occupying, near the slightly cracked window. The table itself was enough for the two of them, but apparently too large for the apartment seeing as you could only open the fridge when the opposite chair was pulled all the way in.

There was one highlight to their place. The separate bedroom they shared. It was nice to just close everything else off and encase themselves into the small space. Their little space wasn't much; however it was all they needed. Neither one bothered with the need for something more suitable; given the fact they didn't stay in one state longer than a few months. Minus the years spent in Boston.

Emma looked back at her girlfriend who was placing the money into piles, separating the larger bills from the smaller ones. "How did we do?" she asked, taking another sip of beer.

"Good…actually. Just under 6,000."

"Nice," she looked at the television, keeping her eyes glued to the screen, "how much do we have all together now?"

"Hmmm…" a brief pause, "just over 28,000"

Emma nearly choked on her beer. "Seriously."

Regina smiled, "yes, our best so far." The brunette rubber banded the money, collected all the piles and brought them to a large plastic bag hidden in floor board where the rest of their money was. After closing it back she raised her arms above her head for a stretch. "Mmm…we should celebrate." Her tone deepened.

"Oh yeah?" Emma asked, green orbs watching her girlfriend seductively walk towards her.

"Yes, we'll feast like royals," she joked as she stood over the blonde smiling saucily before slowly placing a knee on either side of her lap, straddling her. "I think we should start with me." A promiscuous grin.

The blonde looked up at her unfathomably sexy girlfriend. She placed the palm of her hand on the other woman's ass, while the other still held her beer. "You always have the best ideas," she grinned before using the hand on Regina's ass to lower her further onto her lap.

The brunette gently took the brown bottle out of the other woman's hand to place it on a box next to the couch. The pale free hand joined its twin, fully palming both firm galls. "It's a gift." Regina muttered as her lowered plump lips to meet pink ones.

Emma tilted her head upward meeting her girlfriend halfway. She allowed her hands to sooth up the soft tanned skin of the woman above her before sliding back down to grip and firmly squeeze the brunette's backside. Regina hummed softly into the other woman's mouth, feeling a light rush of arousal to her slowly throbbing sex.

The blondes tongue forced its way into her girlfriend's mouth, sliding against the other before withdrawing and repeating the same movement. Regina wrapped her arms around the blondes shoulder shifting slightly. Her knee hit the nearby remote changing the channel while simultaneously turning the volume full blast.

The loud noise made them jump and break apart. Emma reached for the remote turning the television down as Regina recognized what was playing. The blonde seized the opportunity to suck on the exposed neck of the other woman.

"I love this movie," Regina stated almost as whisper. Emma's mouth working on her neck hazing her mind again.

"Mmhmm," the blonde mumbled as she continued to kiss her neck.

A tanned hand tangled themselves into blonde tresses. "It's so romantic,"

"Mmhmm," a small bite on the brunettes pulse point.

"I…" she took a breath as her arousal increased, "always through it was sweet the way he would say he loves her before they made love."

Emma scoffed then, breaking contact on her neck to bring her lips to Regina's.

"What?" The brunette asked curiously.

"Nothing babe," Emma tried to kiss her again only to be denied, groaning in result.

"No, tell me." Brown eyes met green. "What's wrong with romance?"

The blonde sighed. She did not want to have this conversation right now. Not when she would rather be occupying her mouth with other…more delicious things. But it was better just to be honest. The faster she answered the faster she could get back to satisfying her growing arousal. "Nothing wrong with romance…I just think it is a bit…over the top." Another attempt to kiss the brunette was denied once more. She rolled her eyes then.

"How is it over the top?" A raised eyebrow.

"Gina…" Emma whined. "I'm just saying it's unrealistic," a kiss to her chin. "Now can we please get back our celebration? I want my feast." She leaned forward nibbling onto exposed tanned skin.

"Unrealistic?" Regina question.

The blonde threw her head into the brunettes shoulder exaggeratingly. "Yes."

"How?"

Were they seriously doing this now?

Emma retracted her head and looked up at her girlfriend, "because...I mean…I've fucked you plenty of times without having to say I love you." She stated nonchalantly.

Wrong answer.

The blonde regretted the words as soon as she said them.

Regina looked at her girlfriend, all but scowling at how insensitive the other woman could be. She quickly removed herself from atop the blonde's lap.

"Aww come on Gina, you know I didn't mean it like that." She grabbed her girlfriends arm, stopping her from retreating into their bedroom.

"You are so ridiculous sometimes." The brunette said annoyed, snatching her arm away, walking to the only other room in the apartment.

"I'm sorry," she whined, feeling proverbially blue balled.

Regina just ignored her, entering the bedroom and slamming the door.

Emma sat back on the couch, "fuck…" a silent self-reprimanding. Green eyes focused on the closed white door, "what about my feast!" she yelled loud enough for her girlfriend to hear.

The door opened then allowing Regina to peek out just enough for Emma to see her face, "you can feast on the foot you just put in your mouth!" it slammed shut again.

The blonde sat slack jawed.

Touché.

Let me know what you guys think. Oh and an update is coming for Story of a Caged Bird. Especially since I got this out of my system.