AN: SPOILERSSSS. Sort of. I'm pretty sure we all knew Sam was leaving so that's not really a spoiler. But I wrote this after watching 3.01 so I am sure hints of that creeped in. It is barely edited, and will either stay as a one-shot or be continued as a letter writing tale if it gets a reasonable response/I am inspired to write more. It seems a bit strangely disconnected but hopefully that is in character. Would love some reviews to let me know what you think :) Yay Glee!

Mercedes,

Hi. This is weird. My handwriting is terrible, I'm sorry. I know we said it was too hard to keep talking all the time, and you were pretty mad at me when I left, but I just needed to talk to you. You're not answering my calls and even if you don't write back at least I know I've sent it out there and hopefully you'll even read it. So here I am, writing you a letter. Maybe it'll be easier this way, be my pen pal?

I miss you. Sorry if that's not fair, but this place just doesn't feel like home because you're not here. I'm thinking of joining the Glee club here, but I don't think they're as good as New Directions. It's not the same. It's weird how attached I got to McKinley when I was only there for a year. And that year was filled with drama, to say the least.

Star Wars came out on Blu-Ray the other day. I don't have anyone to watch it with. I know you're not the biggest Star Wars fan, but you sat through so much nerdy stuff with me. I miss those days over the summer where we just watched movies together. There aren't many other girls out there that would do that with me, and actually seem to enjoy it. But other girls aren't you at all.

Sorry, again. I didn't want this letter to be annoying and sad. But it's just hard because everything I look at reminds me of you. Stacey was asking about you today. She really loved hanging out with you, she said both of us but I don't think she really likes hanging out with her brother as much as she likes singing and dancing to Disney songs with 'Cedes.

The new house is nice, it's not like where we used to live and I have to share a room with Stevie but it's also not a motel. So I'm pretty happy with it. And Mom and Dad are happy again, Mom laughed yesterday for the first time since we lost our house, like really laughed, and she is smiling so much more. We're not completely all right with our money and everything, but things are definitely looking up for the Evans family.

I guess I should be a lot happier with where I am write now, my family is back on its feet, my brother and sister are settling in to school really well, my parents are okay again, there's a roof over our head and food on the table, that's the dream right? But my mind keeps coming back to you. We weren't together for very long, but you sure made an impression Mercedes Jones. You made me happy when I really didn't think that was possible. You're the sweetest and strongest person I've ever met. And definitely the first person I've really truly been in love with.

I probably should have told you that earlier than I did, I'm sorry again, for telling you that when I knew I was leaving, but you have to know I never would have left if it was up to me. I would have stayed and spent every second of this year making you feel beautiful.

I think I better leave this letter here, this wasn't supposed to be this long, or sappy and about how much I miss you and how much I screwed up. Just know that I love you, and I hope you are happy, you deserve that and so much more.

Sam.

Mercedes folded the letter with shaking hands, tucking it under her pillow before pulling a cushion tight to her chest and sinking into the comfort of the bed beneath her. She lifted a hand to furiously wipe away the tears and shook her head in an attempt to clear her thoughts. Sam had left, it hadn't been his fault, but he was gone and he'd left in the worst way possible. Turned up at her house the day he was moving, told her he loved her, and then he was just gone from her life.

She had forced herself to move on, to find someone else because while she didn't need a man, she needed something to take her mind of the big dork-with-a-trouty-mouth shaped hole that she now found in her life. She was not the kind of girl to sit around weeping because the first guy she'd ever felt truly special around had moved to another state. Even if he was completely adorable and handsome and the sweetest guy she had ever known and had made her realize what it was like to be loved and cared for.

The worst part was that she knew he was hurting, it was evident in the way his letter kept coming back to the same thing, he missed her, he still cared about her. It was evident in the way that every week she received a similar sounding heartfelt voicemail from the boy in question, begging her to call him back. It wasn't his fault that his parents had only managed to find a job out of state, and she knew it wasn't fair to still be so angry with him. But Mercedes thought she'd finally found her high-school equivalent of a happy ending. The realization that that was over, her first fleeting encounter in the dating world, had been taken from her in a flash, it was a tough thought to bear.

But she had to do just that. And lying around being depressed wasn't going to fix anything, Sam wasn't coming back and their situation wasn't going to change. And so she stood, rushing to the bathroom to wash her face and fix her hair.

Mercedes Jones was a strong, beautiful woman that wasn't going to let some boy writing her a sweet, wistful letter bring her down. She was going to pick herself up and enjoy the day, with a new man by her side, even if she couldn't help thinking to herself, as she shot a quick text to arrange them to meet up, that no matter how hard she searched, no man seemed to compare to Sam Evans.