AN: I don't own Gundam Wing, and I don't own the song "Hear You Me" (written by Jimmy Eat World). Please, please, please, if you don't know this song, find an .mp3 online to listen to while you read. I promise - just trust me - that the lyrics do not give it justice. I'm sorry for writing another sad one…but you know me - I hear a song, get hit with an idea, and I can't do a bloody thing about it. Sorry guys. :)
-Dragonfire707
This one is dedicated to Jess. We loved you, Jessie, through all the good times, and all the bad. Know that you were an angel to the little girl that sat on your lap…and may angels lead you in.
May Angels Lead You In
The grass was verdant, luscious…beautiful, and as the scent of rain filled the air, it mingled with the sweet smell of green life. A soft wind was born from the east, and it wound through the small trees, the organized plots of flowers, and the stone statues of roses and angels. Tiny wildflowers, light purple and soft peach in color, peered hopefully over the thousands of plaques that surrounded them; a few brave little songbirds softly crooned wistful lullabies as they swooped over the long black car driving, slowly, back down the hill.
The grass surrounding one statue was trampled slightly, and the rich dark earth, freshly moved, smelled of new beginnings and old memories. A young woman, standing not five feet away, softly fingered the white rose in her hand, letting her fingertips trail over the velvety, untainted petals. The pristine white of the blooming flower contrasted sharply with the deep black of her dress, a beacon of hope, and love, against a stark backdrop of grief and regret.
A tremulous exhale escaped her lips; it was immediately lost in the soft spring wind, borne away across the field of green grass and silver statues, up to the heavens, where the clouds stretched their soft gray fingers up to hide from the sun. She breathed in, tasting the sweet spring air, the promising aroma of dark earth, and felt the kind wind gently caress her weary and tear-stained face.
They had left her; they had all returned to their cars, speaking in hushed tones that the breeze lifted and carried away from her ears so that she was spared the pain of hearing their pitying remarks. But she preferred it this way; for a moment, it was just the two of them, together, again…and besides, with him gone, she knew she had nowhere left to turn.
There's no on in town that I know
You gave us some place to go
I never said thank you for that
Thought I might get one more chance
Her eyes closed slowly, hiding the vibrant sapphire from the world…eyelids closing over eyes that were tired, and sore, from the constant pouring of tears. She breathed in again, relishing in the sweet aromas of springtime, and touched the white rose once more, losing herself in another time, years ago…
"You let him go! Relena, are you insane? You are in love with him, and you let him walk out the door - "
She didn't turn, just lightly touched the windowpane, and watched the snowflakes twirl downwards outside."And you know what the worst of it is? You know what is killing me more than anything else? It's not even that you let him get on that plane, it's that - "
The dark-haired pilot stopped abruptly, watching the single teardrop escape and trail very slowly down her cheek. Surprised, he whispered, "I don't even have to tell you, do I? You know just as well as I do, that…"
She closed her eyes.
"…he's in love with you too." A pause filled the air, a pause as cold and lonely as the winter outside. Finally, Duo murmured, "Why, Relena?"
"If you love someone," she whispered, pressing her forehead against the window, shivering from the cold, "you let them go."
They told her that she had come so far, that she had exceeded anyone's expectations. No one had ever imagined she would succeed as she had, and not only in her career - but in life. She was so happy…life was truly, truly perfect.
But it wasn't her. It wasn't her. The happiness was because of her angel. Without him…she was nothing.
What would you think of me now
So lucky, so strong, so proud?
I never said thank you for that
Now I'll never have a chance
There was a small noise as she choked on another wave of tears, suppressing them, keeping them back for the benefit of others. For so long, she had been so lonely, so lost…until another springtime, atop another hill, when her world finally turned towards the sun.
The forest was cool, dark, and peaceful, such a change from the inside of the house just a few hundred yards away. She stood at the edge of the trees, staring up into the branches of a tall oak, through whose branches she could glimpse the bright smiling of the stars.
She heard someone behind her, and sighed. These moments alone were so precious, so necessary, and the only things holding her together. Sadly, she turned -
- and then stopped abruptly.
"Zechs - Zechs told me you were out here."
The timbre of his voice resonated throughout the trees, mingling with the twilight farewells of the birds and the soft sounds of a forest settling to sleep. It was dark, but a starlight was shining in those deep blue eyes, and it illuminated everything - even the darkest corners of her heart.
"Heero?"
She watched, saw the strong face, usually so solid, so stable, so unchanging - saw the mask break, and crumble, and watched him hold back tears not unlike the thousands she had been crying continuously inside her heart.
Words were unnecessary. Unable to believe, daring to hope, she reached out, her fingertips barely brushing his face.
His eyes closed at her touch, and then just a moment later opened. Surprising her, he stepped forward, sliding an arm around her waist and pulling her into him. Tears pouring from her face, Relena returned the embrace, wrapping her arms around his neck and holding as fiercely as she could.
"Heero…" she whispered, breathing in his strong, masculine scent, "…four years. Four years. I thought - I thought you were never coming back."
He pulled back, softly lifting a thumb to her face to wipe away the tearstains. "I'm here, Relena."
She didn't speak, but in her sapphire eyes dwelt a question, one that he knew had to be answered.
"I realized," he began roughly, voice scratchy from unshed tears, "that I had a gift, and it was one too precious to lose." He paused, then murmured softly, "Other men - other men have seen angels, Relena. But I…I have seen you, and held you, and - and I realized that that is more of a happiness than anyone could ever dream of."
And with that, he pulled her towards him again, this time to press his lips softly against hers. It was a kiss of apology, for all of his silences and masks over the years, all of the time lost, and though it wasn't a kiss one would call passionate, or heated…it took both of them from this world of sorrows and grief, and up to the heavens to fly among the stars.
The first raindrop came dancing downwards, to land softly on the silver statue just in front of her. Her eyes opened and gazed forward at the words etched carefully, lovingly, into the stone:
"The greatest thing you'll even learn is to love and be loved in return."
The words blurred together, and she lost the battle with her tears.
May angels lead you in
Hear you me my friend
On sleepless roads the sleepless go
May angels lead you in
"What am I going to do?" she whispered to the silver clouds overhead, and to the words engraved on the statue before her. "How am I going to…to fall asleep tonight? To wake up tomorrow? To - " her voice broke, and Relena closed her eyes and let the wind wipe away her tears. After a moment, she tried again, her voice barely audible. "Did we do something wrong? Was I…did I not appreciate you enough? Tell me," she cried, into the coming storm, "tell me, because I don't know if I can keep going…if we can keep going…We were happy, and then you were taken away from me…"
And if you were with me tonight
I'd sing to you just one more time
A song for a heart so big
God wouldn't let it live
She was sobbing uncontrollably now, hot tears that stung her eyes, but from her mouth came no sound…not a whimper, not a gasp…just the tears, falling to the lush green grass like rain. And not knowing what else to do, she slowly knelt, resting her head on the side of the silver statue. The white rose in her fingertips caught the breeze and fell from her hand, landing softly at the base of the stone, just below a line of small words that she had never noticed before:
"Sadness flies away on the wings of time."
She stared for a long time, as the tears finally came to a halt and the breeze soothingly caressed her hot face.
May angels lead you in
Hear you me my friend
On sleepless roads the sleepless go
May angels lead you in
Silver raindrops began to fall, a cool spring shower that soaked her wheat-colored hair and gently eased the weariness in her body. Relena drew a breath and touched her fingers to her lips, and then softly brushed her fingertips across the engraved words. Someone had left her a final message, something to help her lift her eyes to the heavens…and remember.
Closing her eyes, and letting one last tear fall, she whispered in a voice as fervent and passionate as it was shaky and sorrowful, "I love you."
Finally she stood, pressing her hand against the statue, watching the rain wash away the dust and the pain. And then…she stepped back, bringing the hand to her heart…feeling him there, with her, in the silver of the clouds, the hopeful grass, and the caressing breeze.
"I love you," she repeated, and, slowly, turned her back to the statue, the white rose, and the sweet words of comfort.
She stopped a few footsteps away, and knelt. Gazing into eyes that were a deep, Prussian blue, she lifted two little hands and held them in her own.
"Do you feel the rain?" she whispered, touching her forehead against another.
The little head of dark brown curls nodded, wide blue eyes gazing, a little frightened, into hers.
"That's your daddy," Relena whispered again, closing her eyes and feeling the drops against her skin. "He's telling you that he misses you, sweetheart, and he doesn't want us to be sad."
May angels lead you in
Hear you me my friend
On sleepless roads the sleepless go
May angels lead you in
The last car pulled away from the hill, retreated down towards the city. As she drove, her tears were the same color as the rain outside - sweet, hopeful silver - but she didn't notice. She watched in the rearview mirror as two little hands pressed against the back window, gazing at a lone statue on a hilltop amid thousands of others. And then when the statue, and the grassy hilltop, finally faded from view, the eyes so much like her father's watched, with nothing but trust and overwhelming love, the springtime rain dance softly downwards to the lush green earth.
AN: Review?? :)