Summery: Faith had long since abandoned them. Contains back story for a section of Times Of War. DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE RELIGIOUS.
Author's Note: Hm… This actually all came from a continuation of my last story; Times of War. The Pope died, and I got a review saying that they were curious as to what his back story was. The rest I made to accompany it, I guess.
WARNING: If you are devoutly Christian or Catholic, or you believe in God, Jesus, Mary, etc., DON'T READ! It might make you angry… So don't flame, I warned you.
By the way: The pope's apprentice was basically sheltered from the world, and has/had no clue as to how the world works in most ways, and didn't know of any of the past pope's or anything either.
The Pope's Assistant~
The Pope had been seen as many different things. Some think he is evil, others think of him as a saint. No one, however, thinks of him as a man. No one thinks of him as a human, a mortal. No one believes in mere men!
No… we believe in soldiers, in leaders… never men. Men can die; a leader cannot. A saint cannot. The Pope cannot.
But even so…
His last words echoed in my ears.
"Never again will I make these mistakes…"
What mistakes? Wasn't he a saint? Only mortals make mistakes. Right?
But… no. He couldn't be…
He couldn't be a man! He was a saint! It had to be a mistake… I'm a mortal man; I can make mistakes. Not the Pope. He's a saint… he's my savior. He's our pathway to the Lord! No one can defeat his pride for his cause, his humble nature, and his kindness. No such person could be a man. Never men…
Never mortals. Never us; we're weak. But the Pope was supposed to be strong… He was infallible. No one could touch him; he was the epitome of innocence. He was like a bright light with his love for Christ and The Lord…
But…
He died.
Does that mean that that was all a lie?
A simple lie?
Was he really the saint I thought he was?
God~
It really pains me, sometimes, to watch the earthlings struggle… all the while justifying themselves with empty lies speaking of how it's all for me.
No, it isn't.
It never was, either. Sure, sometimes some of them think they're doing it for me… or even go so far as to delude themselves; but they don't do it for me. They never do.
It was never about me…
If I could take back the Genesis, I would. Humans should not have been, and if it weren't for my selfishness, the world would be a better place. In some ways, I agree with Satan: humans should not be. However, I don't want them to just… die. Or at least, I don't want them to die in a devastatingly horrific way…
It would be better if they just died out… It would make everything better. The world would be healthier; animals happier, the waters cleaner.
Then maybe the guilt could fade… though unfortunately, in being God, it is not likely.
The guilt will most likely live on within me…
But then again…
Maybe it wont.
Jesus~
I… put my father to shame.
They speak of me enduring the pain for them, but alas, it remains untrue.
I was weak.
I let everyone around me down; my disciples, my Lord and Father, those who followed my faith… I couldn't do it. I died, with so much more that should have been done.
But worst of all, I couldn't protect her. Her honor was stolen by my most trusted disciple; her innocence stolen by a common slave.
She suffered more pain than I ever did; and she lived through it. For me.
Why am I unable to do as she does? Why was I weak, while she was strong? I am made of God's essence; I should prevail over all. Yet, even so, she was stronger.
Once, she told me of how the power had gone to my head. I denied it. Another time, she spoke of how impure I had become, yet I said it was not possible. I was made of God himself. I was the purest of all the men! Yet she denied my claims.
And in her denial of my claims, I became angry. All I knew of what is good and holy was thrown from my mind in my fit of rage.
Minutes later, she lie before me, dead. Her carcass was mangled, and as I returned from my stupor, I realized that I had done this: I had commit the one, true treason.
With that, I quickly feel from grace.
And now, after being crucified and reborn, I lie truly dead in the pits of Hell.
Heaven was never a place for murderers, holy or not.
I was no exception.
Satan~
I have to say, these days, Heaven, God, and Jesus aren't what they used to be.
Sure, they're still what most would call "All that is Holy and Good," but they lack the substance they used to have. Just look at Jesus! I have him burning in a pit just a couple of minutes from here. God's finally lost hope for the humans, and Heaven is almost empty. Not a good soul in sight, down on Earth.
Why, though? Heaven used to almost overflow with all the kind people there, why did it stop? Are they really that bad now? I mean, it's not as if I deliberately go out and search for humans to corrupt anymore, I haven't needed to in centuries. But I thought it was more a question of the increased population than a higher crime rating.
Hm… I haven't checked up on the statistics in a while, I wonder if it's gone up much?
A couple of days ago I got a soul that had been pure for most of it's life, but it appeared that it had taken a drastic turn a mere few hours before it's death. Maybe God's standards are just too high.
The guy had been the Pope's Apprentice, and he had gone slightly mad after the Pope died. He had commit suicide, and he kept rambling on about how the Pope couldn't be mortal, oh no, he was a saint. He never made mistakes.
I wonder…