A/n: Hello everyone, and thank you for taking the time to look into my story. This idea was spawned through a conversation with my sister – who, in the hopes of stopping my obsession with shipping a Fem!Bilbo with pretty much everyone from the Company (in different AUs), mentioned that I might as start shipping her with Gandalf. Well, the Plot Bunnies heard her and ran with the idea. A small tugboat, wooden raft, and Plot Bunny marching band and cheerleading squad later… here we are.
Just a couple of things to note before I get on with the story. For those of you who do not know, Gandalf is a Maia – a race of beings created by Eru to help the Valar (who are kinda like angels… but only kinda) in their jobs. Gandalf (known as Olorin while living in Valinor) was one of Manwe's (king of the Valar) servants. When Sauron started wreaking havoc on Middle Earth, several of the Valar sent 5 of the Maiar to Middle Earth to help the people defeat Sauron. The Valar put on them the forms of old men so that they would be unable to use their full potential.
In my AU/headcannon/thing, Gandalf is maturity-wise a young Maia. Even though he's been alive since before Middle Earth was created, he still sounds young to me. One of the reason Manwe chose him to go to Middle Earth as an Istari was because Gandalf was scared of Sauron. Manwe hoped that by fighting against Sauron, Gandalf would find his courage. So, picture a young-ish (say around 25ish, 'cause you can be wise and still be young) Gandalf in this story. It's a little weird, but it makes me happy and keeps the Plot Bunnies occupied. There isn't much else I can ask for. :D
Also, there are some things in the story that might need a little further clarification. I've placed numbers in brackets after those things (usually names or sentences that need some information from one of Tolkien's lesser known books). The notes themselves are at the bottom of the story. If there's anything you don't understand, please feel free to let me know, and I will either provide further clarification or make adjustments to the story.
Okay, now that that's out of the way. :D Please excuse any grammatical mistakes you find. I did not have a beta for this story, and though I read it over many times, I'm more than positive I missed some here and there.
Special note to AustralianRanger012: Hey! Sorry I didn't get this up today. I was doing a final read-through before I went to publish it when Mandos decided to start talking and that spurned an argument I did NOT see coming. 0_0 Anyhoodles, once I got that sorted out (almost 500ish words later) it was time for lunch and then cleaning and then chess club and the day just slipped away. I hope this lives up to your expectations, my friend! Thank you ever so much for being willing to put up with my ramblings about my annoying Plot Bunnies (who gave me 2 more ideas for one-shots just today!), and helping me with ideas for this crazy AU! God bless you!
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this story; all I own are the Plot Bunnies sitting in the bushes at Bag End playing music for Gandalf and Bilba. I'm also pretty sure I've caused Tolkien to roll over in his grave by even thinking about this idea. :/
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"This was not what I had in mind when you told me what you had seen concerning Olorin, Lorien."
Most beings would shrink under the weight of the glare that was levelled at the slight, dark-haired Vala sitting amidst his siblings on the right side of the room. However, Lorien was not most beings. He was the Master of Visions, Dreams, and Desires. Very few could plumb the depth of his knowledge, and even the Lord of the Valar had a difficult time discerning all that he knew [1]. Had Manwe been able to unnerve him, it would have happened long before then.
Lorien simply raised an eyebrow, tilting his head as he gazed back at Manwe. "I'm sure I have no idea what you mean, my Lord."
"You know perfectly well what I mean, Lorien. Do not attempt to hide behind clever words and vague interpretations. When you told me that Olorin would receive the help he needed from someone from Middle Earth, I thought you were talking about one of the First-Born, or even one from the race of Man. Not -" Manwe curled his lip and gestured to the mirror where the object of their discussion could be seen. "Not this."
Lorien leaned back in his chair, a small smile dancing on the corners of his mouth, "I am sorry that I did not make my vision clearer. It was not my intention to mislead you."
Several snorts were heard around the room from the other Valar. The loudest came from Tulkas and Lorien's brother Mandos. Lorien ignored them all. "You must admit that this will benefit him. Gandalf [2] has been growing weary as of late. His drive to protect those you have placed under his care is as strong as ever, but his spirit thins. If he had not found a further purpose, he would have burned out before too long."
Manwe nodded his agreement, but his mouth was pressed thin, "And so you took it upon yourself to contrive this… this union? In order to strengthen his spirit? The spirit of someone under my care, one of my servants?"
The smile faded from Lorien's face and his eyes narrowed, "One of our servants, Manwe. Eru may have placed him under your care, but do not forget he trained under Nienna [3] and myself as well. We also have an interest in his actions in Middle Earth – and in his well-being." The smile returned. "As to my supposed contrivance of this happy event, I am afraid I cannot take credit for it. That honour belongs to another. All I did was mention what I had seen."
"That's all you did, was it." Manwe growled. He leaned back in his chair, full glare leveled at the younger Fëanturi [4], "Eru save me from you and your mischievous streak. Very well, whom was it that made this event occur?"
The smile on Lorien's face grew and a twinkle graced his eyes to accompany it. He didn't say anything, simply gestured to the Vala sitting to Manwe's right.
Manwe turned to stare at his wife, "Varda? You? You agreed to this... this imp's schemes?"
Varda shook her head, raising a hand slightly to quiet Lorien's outrage at her husband's term for him. She then turned to look at Manwe, "You know many things, my Lord, but none of us can know all. And you are blinded to much concerning Olorin by your love for him." Again, she raised her hand as this time Manwe tried to interrupt. "It is not a bad thing, my Lord, simply one of which you must be aware. Where you may be blind, others might see clearly. You know that Irmo (Lorien) sees far and deep, and he often turns his mirror to Olorin's life.
"I myself often think of Olorin, and, while I do not have either your sight or Irmo's, I have listened to much which concerns him [5]. Dark days are coming for your beloved servant, my Lord, days in which he will need the love and guidance of those around him just as he will need to provide light, guidance, and protection to others."
"This," now it was her turn to gesture to the mirror which hung on the wall before the group, "is one of the aids he will need." She laid a hand on her husband's arm. "Would you deny one who has faithfully served you both comfort and support? Would you take from him that which will give him the strength he needs to continue to stand against the machinations of Gorthaur [6]?"
Manwe sighed. His shoulders relaxed, and he covered Varda's hand with his own, "You know I would not, my Love. I would see any and all assistance placed at Olorin's disposal."
"Then do not despair at this happenstance." Varda stated. "But rejoice. For here lies one of Olorin's greatest strengths, though he does not yet know it."
They both turned to look into the mirror where they could see Olorin, in the form of an old man wreathed in a gray cloak, holding the hand of a young Hobbit woman. They were seated on a bench positioned before the open door of a large smial. Both held pipes, and every so often Olorin would shape the smoke into different forms causing the Hobbit to laugh. The love that shone from both of their eyes attested to their feelings for each other.
"What I want to know," Aule interrupted, "is why, out of all the peoples he could have chosen from, he goes and picks a hobbit as his wife. What's wrong with my dwarves?"
Mandos, Lorien, Yavanna, and Orome all groaned. Aule shied away from his wife as she attempted to slap him for bringing up his creation for the 6 time since the beginning of their meeting.
Manwe tuned them all out, focusing solely on the image still captured by the mirror. As he watched, Olorin leaned down to place a kiss on the hobbit's forehead. The gesture helped ease the concern sitting in his heart, but did not erase it completely.
It was not that he did not wish for Olorin to get married. Indeed, it was something he had long hoped for. Olorin was young in spirit despite his age, and Manwe knew that he would only be benefited by a union with someone who was his equal. However, he had not counted on him falling in love while in Middle Earth, nor with a mortal. He did not wish for Olorin to have to go through the heartbreak of losing one whom he would come to love more than himself.
The Hobbit – he would have to discover her name before too long, for he could not keep calling her "The Hobbit" – leaned against Olorin's arm. He, in turn, wrapped his arm around her, tucking her more firmly against his side. The action brought a smile to the king of the Valar's face. While his sight was not as powerful without Varda's assistance, the proximity of the mirror helped him reach out and touch his favorite servant's future.
He could see it as it twisted and turned out of sight. Most was shrouded in shadow, and Death and Sorrow stalked much of the road. But there was light also – and joy. Most of that joy centered on the imprint the small woman left on Olorin's life, casting the shadows back and keeping Death at bay.
The fear within Manwe's heart uncoiled, and he found himself becoming grateful for Lorien's meddling. He did not wish to lose Olorin in the fight against Gorthaur. And it would seem that, despite all appearances, this hobbit would be the way in which that was secured. Despite the heartache that such a union would cause, and his wishes to prevent said heartache, he did not think that Olorin would regret his decision to wed her. He was one who loved with his full heart, accepting both the joy and the sorrow in equal measure.
"Looks like Olorin is going to need a bit more than a room in your mansion once he gets back, Manwe."
Manwe looked up from his thoughts at the comment. Mandos was smiling at him from his seat next to Lorien. Manwe forced himself not to groan. One Fëanturi was bad enough, was he now to have to deal with both?
"What do you mean, Námo?" He questioned.
"I mean that Olorin is going to need a place of his own once he returns. He is not going to want to bring his wife from the splendor of that smial to the confines of a room – no matter how grand it is. They're going to need a proper house. She looks as if she likes to socialize."
Manwe frowned, "Námo, she is mortal. By the time Olorin's mission is complete, she will have long passed into your halls."
Mandos looked at him incredulously, "You think she'll be staying in my halls? I would sooner face all the hordes of Morgoth myself than keep Olorin from his wife. I do not want a repeat of Beren and Luthien [7]. Nienna didn't let me have a moment's peace, and Olorin would not be as gentle in his supplications as Luthien was. I'll make the request to Eru myself if need be. [8]"
Oromë leaned forward in his seat, "You cannot do that! You will break up the rules by which this world was formed. I can understand Luthien's plight – and far be it from me to contest the will of Eru – but if you allow the Hobbit to be released as well, you will be inundated with requests for the return of loved ones. It will be madness!"
Mandos's eyes blazed, "So you would rather me suffer through Olorin physically attempting to bring his wife back day after day? Like that will be any better."
Oromë shook his head, "No. I would rather this entire marriage not happen in the first place! It would be one thing if Olorin had married one of the First-Born. Then you would be justified in releasing her spirit after a time. But a mortal? There are reasons why immortals should not marry mortals. It creates problems such as this."
Nienna frowned at him speaking up for the first time since the start of the meeting, "It is not a problem, Oromë. It is a blessing for Gandalf. How would you feel if Alatar or Pallando [9] found their loves in mortals? Would you deny them that comfort as well?"
"We are not discussing my servants, Nienna. They know better than to cleave themselves to someone who cannot be with them for eternity. They know that it would cause havoc in the order of the world."
Mandos rolled his eyes, "It will no more disrupt the order of the world then when Beren and Luthien were brought back."
All the Valar turned to stare at him.
He sighed as he realized what he had just said. "Bad example [10]." He admitted. "However, Eru commanded that, so it was supposed to happen. And if Bilba is allowed release, it will also be by His command. Or would you contend against Eru Himself, Oromë?"
The two Valar stared at each other, neither one willing to look away first. Everyone else looked on. The tension in the room grew to such an extent Manwe was surprised someone didn't snap.
"Well, I for one think it will be a good thing." Aule spoke up breaking the silence.
The room descended once again into various arguments and conversations. Yavanna, Varda and Nienna were discussing just where they were going to place Olorin and his wife's new house and how they would decorate it. Vána and Nessa looked on and commented every now and then. Vairë sat quietly, documenting everything in the tapestry she had begun at the beginning of the meeting. Lorien had teamed up with Mandos to continue the argument against Oromë while Aule and Tulkas were enjoying listening in.
Manwe rubbed his forehead. Of course, Olorin would find a way to formulate trouble without even being present. And of course, his wife would have the same ability. The next few years were going to be very interesting.
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NOTES:
1: The Silmarillion states that Lorien is the Master of visions and dreams (the "desires" part comes from the LOTR wiki), but lists Mandos as the one knowing all that shall be. However, the LOTR Wiki states that in other versions, Lorien had a cauldron in which he could see visions. I have gone with that version.
2: I chose to have Lorien call Gandalf "Gandalf" instead of Olorin because he himself is mostly known by Lorien (the name of his dwelling place) rather than his actual name, Irmo.
3: Nienna is the sister of both Lorien and Mandos. She teaches about pity and endurance of hope (according to LOTR wiki, Gandalf was her greatest student). She dwells alone and rarely comes to Valimar. However, I figured she would come to this meeting because she was concerned about Gandalf.
4: Both Mandos and Lorien were considered the "Masters of Spirits" with Lorien being the younger brother.
5: Quoting from the Silmarillion: "When Manwe there ascends his throne and looks forth, if Varda is beside him, he sees further than all other eyes, through mist, and through darkness, and over the leagues of the sea. And if Manwe is with her, Varda hears more clearly than all other ears the sun of voices that cry from east to west, from the hills and valleys, and from the dark places that Melkor has made upon Earth."
I took a little bit of poetic license with this one in making both Manwe and Varda able to see/hear into the future if they are with each other.
6: Back to LOTR Wiki for this one. According to it, Sauron was called Gorthaur the Cruel by the other Maiar. I figured that it would work just as well for the Valar to call him that as well.
7: In the tale of Beren and Luthien, Beren ends up dying and Luthien's spirit gives up and goes to the Halls of Mandos. While there, she sings of her love for Beren and cries for Mandos to allow them to be together again. Mandos was "moved to pity, who never was so moved, nor has been since." By Eru's power, Beren and Luthien were given a second chance together as mortals.
I've taken more artistic license with the "never has been since" part. I kinda think that the thought of Gandalf hounding Mandos every day (and trying to find any way he could get Bilba out of his halls) is just too much for that Vala. It's not pity that moves him to ask Eru to let Bilba out, it's self-preservation! J
8: Mandos does not have the ability to release people from his halls as near as I can tell from my research. That comes from Eru, and can only be used on those He chooses to release from death (such as Glorfindel and Luthien and Beren).
9: The names of the two Blue Wizards; they were both Orome's Maiar. Alatar was sent first, and he brought Pallando with him.
10: Beren and Luthien's son was named Dior. He was the father of Elwing – who married Elendil and bore Elrond and Elros. It is through Elros that we get the line of the kings of Gondor (and thus Isildur, Elendil, and Aragorn).