Here's one of my sadder one-shots. It's a TxP, but it's a tragedy, as in, one of them will die, or is dead. I thought of this yesterday at school, and I just had to get it up on ff. I wrote the beginning of it on a sheet of paper, and I skipped lunch to finish it and start planning out how the one shot would go. I didn't get much done, but I'll post it today anyway. I named it Fumetsu Mai, because that's the most direct Japanese translation I could find for the song I based it off of, My Immortal, by Evanescence. Technically, it's 'Immortal my' by translation, but just go alone with it. Without further ado, my very first romantic tragedy.
Silence reigned in the darkened room, filling it with a heavy, almost substantial presence. The only source of light were thin slivers of sun peeking from the heavy curtains in front of a large bay window. A small ray of light fell on a single lock of ebony hair. A thick, heavier mass of silk fell over a small, elfin face, hiding her from the cruelty of the cold hearted world. Her small hand gripped a pendant hanging from a golden strand around her graceful neck.
The small form shook with quiet sobs as she lay; curled up in his office chair, inhaling the heady scent of his unique, one-of-a-kind cologne. His favorite jacket hung on the back of the chair, and she pressed her face into the lapel, simply drinking him in. Her body quaked in memory, and fresh tears trickled down her face.
The chair was still firmly molded to his body shape. Her instincts told her that she shouldn't disturb his study, but she wanted so badly to be close to him again; if only in spirit. Her body hummed with satisfaction as her small form barely filled the big black leather chair, curled up into a ball. She felt like a child in an adult's chair, but she did not care. She cuddled and nuzzled the leather material and inhaled. Oh kami, his scent was embedded into the chair. She nuzzled her nose into the chair, feeling oh so very greedy as she drank his essence in, trying to feel him near her again. What she would give to have him in her arms, if only for one last night.
She could remember the day it happened; like the day of her wedding, and the birth of their first two children, it was permanently etched into the surface of her brain, never to leave her, no matter how old she got. She doubted she could even forget it if she hit her head and got amnesia somehow...
Two weeks ago...
"Hi, Mama, can I ask you a favor?" Pan asked, holding the phone between her shoulder and her ear. "Depends on what you need, darling." Videl replied with a chuckle, knowing she'd do anything for her only baby. "I need you to come to the Obstetrician with me." Pan told her, glancing around nervously for Trunks. "Oh... Oh, sweetie, are you-"
"Mama, I don't know, that's why I'm asking you to make the trip with me." Pan cut her off as Trunks entered the kitchen, whistling happily, "so, I'll meet you at the mall at twelve, Mama?" Videl knew this as code for 'Trunks was in the room' and played along, "Of course, Pan-chan. I'll see you then." The shared their goodbyes and hung up.
"Mama!" Pan whirled around and caught her young daughter in her arms, "Good morning, Tika-chan!" The two year old giggled and squealed as her face was peppered in butterfly kisses. Trunks watched bemusedly, and hand resting on top of their six year old son; Kālu's head. The boy was the spitting image of his father as a child, but with his mother's fiery spirit. Tika was all Pan, inside and out.
"Kālu-chan , why don't you help your sister get ready for breakfast?" Pan set Tika down and picked Kālu up and kissed his nose. He laughed and squirmed to be let down, "No kisses, Mama." She grinned and kissed his face once more, "There's my little man," before setting him down. He took Tika's little hand and led her to the table.
"So... what has you so cheery this morning, hon?" Pan asked, sidling up to her husband. "We're closing a huge deal today, and when I do, I'm taking my wonderful little family on a vacation." Trunks wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her in close, "how would you like that, Mrs. Briefs?" she giggled and pecked his lips, "I'd love that, Mr. Briefs."
The couple shared a deeper, more romantic kiss, and Pan handed him his coffee mug and a bagel before straightening his jacket and tie with a teasing laugh.
"You can't make a good impression with a crooked tie, President Briefs." Pan said coyly, winking at him. "Must you tease me, Madame President Briefs?" Trunks replied, smirking sardonically at her, and then asked, "So, you're hanging out with your mother today?"
"Yup, we're going to do a little mother-daughter bonding." Pan said with a laugh, "and I'll have to dump our babies off on Goten and Papa for the day, because your mother and Bra are coming with us."
Pan finished fixing his tie with a flourish, and then pulled him down for a kiss good bye. Little did she know; that was one of the last kisses she'd ever share with her wonderful husband.
"Bye-bye, Papa!" Tika called happily after them, and Trunks chuckled and returned to the table to say his goodbyes to their children. Pan watched as he ruffled Kālu's hair and kissed Tika's cheeks and face until she squealed for him to stop, smiling gooily.
"You know I love you, right, Panny?" Trunks asked as they made their way to the front door. "Of course I do." Pan told him, smiling lovingly as he opened the door.
"Remember that, Pan-chan. I'll always love you, no matter what." They kissed again, and Trunks was making his way out to the limo that usually took him to work.
Pan stared after the limo as it pulled away. Why did it feel like he was saying good bye? A harrowing feeling of foreboding dread lodged into her chest, but she pushed it down with a soft chuckle. Her and her paranoid tendencies. She walked back into the house and shut the door, never knowing that it would be the last time he ever crossed the threshold of their happy home...
Two weeks later... (current time)
She reached into her pants pocket and pulled out a shiny, yellow gold wedding band, sized for a masculine hand. She slid it onto her left thumb and kissed it reverently. She remembered how well the color stood out against his skin... and how very pale and cold he'd been when she removed the band from his stiff, callused hand. Despite the reprimands from her parents, she'd lain next to him on that cold, metal bed, whispering to him. She told him that she was, yet again, carrying their child in her womb.
With shaking hands, she removed the thin gold chain from her neck and pulled it away from herself. From the chain swung a round amber orb with four ruby stars floating within it. She took his wedding band and dropped it onto the chain, waited for it to settle next to the bauble, and then put the necklace back on. Once it was firmly clasped, her hand wrapped around it, and her body began to shake with suppressed sobs.
The necklace had been his gift to her on their first wedding anniversary. They spent the first year of their marriage traveling both the world and outer space, making love in between explorations. On the last day of their trip, which was a year after their wedding, he had the necklace made on the last planet they'd visited and presented it to her that following night. In return, she revealed to him that she had conceived their first child; little Kālu...
Seven years ago...
"Isn't the view just amazing, love?" Pan asked eagerly, taking in the nebulas and star clusters that made up the night sky on planet Andros. "Indeed it is." Trunks agreed, reaching around her with a mysterious object, "Happy anniversary, Pan-chan."
Pan gasped as a round object settled just above her cleavage and grabbed it to raise it to her eye level, "Oh, Trunks..." The detail on the little trinket was absolutely extraordinary. No matter how she twisted the orb, the red stars always remained in the same place. She relinquished her hold on the orb and turned to face her husband with watery eyes, "I love it."
"I had a feeling you would, love." Trunks chuckled and pulled her into a deep kiss. Pan groaned into the kiss, gripping the hair at the nape of his neck tightly, and then pulled away, "I need to give you my gift."
"Pan, you didn't need to get me any-"
Pan shook her head vehemently, "Yes, I did, but I didn't exactly 'get' you a gift. I- err, we made it ourselves."
Trunks furrowed his brows in confusion, "Panny, I don't remember making anything with-" He cut off with a gasp because Pan had snatched his hand and placed it on her lower stomach.
"You're pregnant?"
Pan nodded, happy tears running down her cheeks in streams, "Yes, I'm a little over a month along. The healer on the last planet sensed it."
Trunks scooped her up in a hug, "Best anniversary gift ever. We've got to get you back home soon so you can get checked out... but first..." Pan laughed coyly and he leaned and kissed her, wrapping her arms snuggly around his neck, "First what, husband?" He grinned down at his small wife and pressed his lips against hers in a deep kiss, "We celebrate this properly."
"By committing the act that led to this?" She asked, patting her stomach gently. "Oh, but of course, Mrs. Briefs." Trunks lifted her into his arms, and she giggled excitedly as he carried her into the bedroom, where her giggling quickly morphed into moaning as their physical celebration commenced...
Current time...
She looked down at her stomach and nearly started crying all over again. Here she was, in the same position that she'd been in seven years prior, but this time he wasn't here to support her and keep her grounded. She unfolded her legs and let one swing over the side of the arm of the big leather chair. It had been molded to fit his body, so her foot didn't even touch the floor.
"Panny?"
Pan looked up at her father's entry, releasing her hold on her necklace, "Yes, Papa?" Gohan bit his lips nervously before making his way around the mahogany desk to her side. She gazed up at him silently, and then looked away, "Papa, I'm fine." Her father perched on the edge of the desk and stared at her with an unconvinced eye, "You are not. It's been two weeks, and when you're not taking care of the kids, you're in here, sitting in this chair, holding onto that necklace."
"It's not 'that' necklace, Papa! Tru- He gave it to me for our first anniversary! You don't understand how much this necklace means to me! I'm doing the best that I can to get by, and I'm sorry if my best isn't good enough for you!" Pan clambered out of the chair and nearly tripped on her way to the door if Gohan hadn't managed to catch her.
"Panny, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you-" She shook her head, fighting off tears, "It's okay," and looked away, "why am I so weak?" Warm, strong arms wrapped around her waist, and she snuggled eagerly into her father's chest, weeping quietly...
Two weeks ago...
Pan filled out the paperwork at the Obstetricians office carefully. Her mother sat beside her, laughing at something Bulma had said. Bra sat on her other side, texting her own husband; Goten.
"Alright, let me go turn these in." Pan stood up and made her way to the front desk. The cheery nurse working the desk smiled at her and took the papers, "Dr. Majuubi will be with you shortly, Mrs. Briefs. She was rather excited when you called in this morning." Pan chuckled, "I had a feeling she would be. Thank you," and returned to her seat.
"Are you nervous, Panny?" Bra asked. "Of course I'm nervous. I've been nervous the last two times I've been in this position." Pan huffed, and Bra laughed, "Yeah, I remember when Goten and I found out that we were having twins." The brunette gestured to her rounded stomach, "that wasn't that long ago, sister." The bluenette stuck her tongue out at her, and the two best friends burst into a fit of giggles like high school girls.
"You two haven't grown up a bit, I swear." Videl admonished, and Bulma nodded along, "sure haven't. Just wait until Marron gets out here, and then we'll be stuck dealing with all of them." The two mothers shared a laugh.
"Pan-chan! Bra-chan!"
Both women looked up as their blonde best friend made her way out of the examination areas, waddling with her full, pregnant belly, and then got up to rush over to her, "Maz-chan!"
"Aren't you supposed to be on bed rest? Maz, you're huge." Bra hugged the blonde. "You're not that far behind me, sister, and no, I'm two months away from my due date, and I don't want to lay around in the bed all day, with Uub waiting on my hand and foot."
"Are you nuts? I'd love it if Trunks did that for me." Pan snickered and hugged her, "nice to see you, Marron."
"Alright, now," Marron said, slipping into 'Doctor' mode, "let's get you all back to the examination room so we can get this show on the road." Everyone followed the pregnant OB/GYN back to the private examination room.
"Alright, Panny, up on the table." Pan climbed onto the table laid back with her jeans unbuttoned and shirt rolled up. If one looked closely, the slightest definition of a bump could be seen. Marron wheeled the ultrasound machine over and squirted the cool gel onto Pan's stomach, sniggering when she jumped, "You ought to be used to it, Panny. When do you think you conceived?"
"I'd guess a month and a half ago, maybe two months." Pan replied, blushing as she recalled the wicked sex that had taken place at both times, "I can't be too sure." Bra and Marron giggled at her blush, but toned it down when the little Briefs woman shot them a chagrined glare, "shut up."
Marron calmed herself and lowered the wand to Pan's stomach, pushing the gel around. The sound of a heart beat filled the room, and Pan's eyes began to water, "Oh my..."
"There they are." Marron pointed out the outline of the baby on the screen, "I'd place you at about eleven weeks; just under three months. Congratulations, Panny. I'll go print out your prescription for prenatal vitamins and a few ultrasound pictures for Trunks." The pregnant wife of Uub waddled from the room to go complete her tasks.
"Pan... what if you end up having twins, too? That would be awesome!" Bra squealed, and Pan laughed at her exuberance, "thanks, but no thanks. I think I'd like to keep my kid count at three, if it's possible. You and Marron can have four."
Marron was into her fourth pregnancy, having already had three girls; Kaila, Mari, and Juu. She hoped desperately for a boy this time, as she had no intentions of getting pregnant again. Kaila was the oldest at six, Mari was four, and Juu was soon to turn two. Kaila was her mother's spitting image with Uub's brown eyes, Mari was all Uub with Marron's eyes, and Juu was a mini of her grandmother, Juuhachi.
Bra already had a first set of twins; two adorable four year old boys named Goku and Vegeta. How so very ironic that they both looked exactly like their namesakes, but got along, unlike the originals. The set she was carrying now were both girls, so her brood was evened out.
Pan was satisfied with her two little angels, Kālu and Tika, and was happy to add on one last member to their family. Kālu was born with black hair and eyes, like his mother, but both lightened up to a familiar lavender and crystal blue as he got older. Tika had been born with blue hair and eyes like her Grandma and Aunt, but quickly grew into her mother's darker coloring.
'Mine' by Taylor Swift began to blare through the room, causing Pan to jump, but she quickly pulled out her phone and answered it, "Trunks-kun?" A raspy chuckle greeted her, "Hey, Pan-chan." She frowned, "Trunks, are you alright?"
"We closed the huge deal today, and I'm going to head home early. I think my secretary gave me a bad cup of coffee, because I feel kind of weird." Trunks replied as he packed his briefcase in his office.
"Alright, well, we're almost done, so I'll be home soon." Pan told him, "I've got a surprise for you, too." Trunks chuckled again, "I can't wait to see. Panny?"
"Yes, Trunks?"
"I love you." Pan giggled, "I love you, too-"
"No, Panny, I love you so much. You and our wonderful children. You make me feel like the luckiest man in the world, and I just want to thank you for giving me your heart, and our angels. It's been a wonderful seven years, hasn't it?"
"Well, yes, it has, and I believe it takes two to make one, love." Pan stood up, fixed her clothes, and drifted from the room to have privacy, "Baby, what brought this on?"
(A/N: Authoress is officially crying.)
"I really don't know, actually. I woke up this morning with this strange feeling... like I was going to leave and never come back." Pa gasped, "Baby, you're not going anywhere." He coughed suddenly, and Pan realized he was about to start crying, "I don't know what the hell brought this on, but Pan... I don't want to leave you. I want to stay in our home with you and the kids and never leave. Panny, please, don't let me leave."
Tears began to trickle down Pan's face as she listened to her husband's heartbroken plea. "I won't let you. I promise I won't." She vowed, mentally urging Marron to hurry up with the pictures and the prescription so she could meet her husband at home.
"Thank you, Pan-chan. I'm about to start driving, and you know I can't multitask." Trunks gave a watery chuckle as he threw his briefcase in the backseat of his emergency hover car. He always carried it in his capsule case when he didn't feel like waiting on the limo to take him back home.
"I beg to differ." Pan said saucily, and he chuckled again. "I'll see you when you get done with your mom and everyone else. Bye, Panny."
"Bye, Trunks." Pan said softly, and then hung up. Why did that feel so... so final? She had to get home now...
Current time...
Pan couldn't believe what had happened in the next half hour or so that it took her to get home. Even now, it seemed so unbelievable. He'd fought monsters like Majin Buu, Bebi, Brolli, and Omega Shenron and come out alive... but with a single chemical; a fucking allergic reaction, and he was gone. Stolen away from her forever. She'd never regretted living so far away from her nearest neighbors as much as she did now...
Two weeks ago...
"Alright, Panny, here is your prescription, and the pic- Panny, what's wrong?" Marron asked worriedly, waddling over to her friend. The brunette was sitting in a cushioned chair, gripping her hair and shaking one of her legs restlessly. There were dried tear streaks on her cheeks, and her eyes were impossibly wide.
"Trunks had a breakdown over the phone, and I need to get to him, now." She whispered, biting on her bottom lip. What if he was already home, and she wasn't there to comfort him... Oh, kami. Scenarios began to fly through her head, making it pound.
"Alright, I'll go fill your prescription and bring it by later. Here are the pictures, and your mom, Aunt Bulma, and Bra are waiting in the car." Marron passed her a white envelope.
"Thank you so much, Maz-chan. I'll see you later." They pecked each other's cheeks, and Pan was off like a woman on a mission. She slid into the passenger seat and told her mother to go straight home...
*At home*
When, at long last, they pulled up to the house, Pan immediately knew something was wrong. Trunks' hover car was still in the driveway, not in the capsule, and he was parked crooked, like he'd just pulled in, got out, and went in the house. The driver's side door was wide, and the seatbelt was pulled away from the seat, like something was weighing it down while it was still buckled.
Pan unbuckled her seatbelt and rushed over the car. She rounded the back bumper; heart pounding away at her ribcage like it was trying to break out of her chest. Her eyes slowly focused on the thing weighing down on the seatbelt, and she screamed. And screamed. And screamed.
Videl leapt from the car as soon as Pan released her first scream, frightened out of her wits. As soon as she reached her, Pan fell to her knees and vomited into the grass. Videl looked at the car and felt utterly sick. She wanted to vomit too, just staring at him.
Trunks was hanging out of the driver's side door, seatbelt still fastened, but he was barely recognizable. His face and neck were swollen in what was clearly an allergic reaction, and vomit stained the front of the lavender suit shirt that he'd worn to work that day. Crystal blue eyes stared unseeingly at the sky above. One hand was around his throat, probably a result of the asphyxiation, and the other was clinging to... his wallet? Curiosity overtaking her, Videl leaned in close to see what he'd been staring at.
It was a small picture of Pan sleeping on the sofa. Tika was sleeping on her chest, and Kālu's head was resting on her stomach. 'He knew he was going to die...' Videl noticed that Bra was down on her knees, comforting Pan, even as tears ran heavily down her face, and Bulma was calling 9-1-1 while sobbing heavily.
Pan was frozen as Bra hugged her, staring blankly at the vomit stained grass in front of her knees. She couldn't think, couldn't move, couldn't feel, couldn't process the world around her. All she could see was him. Her husband, her wonderful, loving husband... was dead. Her body shook as she struggled to come to terms with what she'd seen. How could this have happened to her? Why did it happen to her? How could Fate be so cruel as to rip him away from her when she would need him most? Here she was, pregnant and alone with two kids. She couldn't see how she could possibly cope with this. Everything around her faded to black as she fainted dead away...
Current time...
Pan sobbed violently into her father's chest, barely aware of the fact that she was hitting him, and yelling 'WHY', at the top of her lungs. Luckily the children were spending the night at Marron's house. Gohan grabbed her forearms and pushed her away from him so they could look each other in the eyes. Midnight met midnight, and Pan ceased her attack as her knees gave out.
She slumped to the floor, unable to do anything but sit there. She couldn't bring herself to cry anymore; her tear ducts stung and throbbed. Gohan sat beside her on the floor and she numbly crawled into his lap and curled up like she used to as a small child. Her father cradled her in his arms and hummed her lullaby, wishing for the entire world that he could get rid of his baby's pain.
For the first time in two weeks, Pan slept without a single dream or nightmare, tucked safely in her father's arms...
One week ago...
Pan sat in the coroner's office, with her mother and Bra on either side of her. Bulma sat next to Bra, and Vegeta stood behind her chair, arms crossed firmly over his chest. Gohan stood behind both Pan and Videl's chairs, a hand on both of their shoulders. Goten stood behind Bra, stroking her hair comfortingly.
Even with her family around her, she never felt so alone. Pan fought back tears as the coroner took a seat before them, a sorrowful expression on his face.
"I'm so sorry you have to be here, Mrs. Briefs," he began, running a hand through his blonde locks, "the results for the autopsy have come back in, as well as the results for the tests we ran on the cup of coffee that his secretary gave him, as you asked. His death was a result of asphyxiation, brought on by an allergic reaction to the coffee."
"That's the same coffee I fix for him every morning before work, so why the hell did he have an allergic reaction to it?" Pan snapped, and Gohan squeezed her shoulder, "Relax, Pan-chan." She forced her hackles down and leaned back into her chair, "What was so different about the coffee he had at work?"
"Are you familiar with date-rape drugs? Roofies?" The coroner asked solemnly. When Pan nodded, he continued, "His secretary slipped a homemade batch into his coffee with the intent to take advantage of Mr. Briefs, but a chemical she used in the mix didn't agree with him. You said he called you and told you he'd felt strange, right?" Pan nodded, "He said that his secretary must've given him a bad cup of coffee."
"We've taken her into custody on the charges of drugging without consent, unintentional homicide, and intention to sexually assault the victim." Pan looked up at him, "is there any way she can get the death penalty?" The coroner's eyes widened, "Mrs. Briefs, I don't-"
"I don't see why she can't get it! She killed one of the most influential men on this fucking planet, and you're giving her a slap on the wrist! She KILLED my HUSBAND!"
Pan stood up, glowering down at the poor man, "She took away the love of my life, and the father of my children! You want to know something else? The day he died, I was going to tell him that I was pregnant again, that BITCH had to try and get some free sex out of him, and now he'll never get to experience the joy I felt when I found out that I was going to have his child again! If you're going to just throw her in prison, you make damn sure that she knows what she's done to this family," tears trickled eagerly down her cheeks, "she killed a husband, a father, a first born son, a best friend, a big brother... she killed an extraordinary person, and I will NEVER forgive her!" she turned on her heel and stormed out of the room.
Pan slid down the wall outside of the room, sobbing violently into her knees. One of the officers working in the outer office noticed the small, shaking form, and went to her aid, "Mrs. Briefs?"
Pan looked up, "Y-yes," wiping at her eyes. She knew her makeup was utterly ruined, but she didn't have the heart to care. What did it matter, anyway?
"Would you like to see him?" her eyes widened, and she nodded. The officer helped her to her feet and led her to the room where they kept the bodies until it was time for them to be prepped for the funeral. He searched the names on the drawers until he reached the one he desired and pulled it out, "I'll leave you alone, now."
Pan waited until he left, and then rushed over to the body, whimpering like a small child. He looked so peaceful, as if he were simply sleeping. She grabbed his left hand and removed the band, pressing a small kiss to the smooth back of his hand. Oh, how she loved these hands. They'd held their children, caressed her face after harsh bouts of morning sickness, fed her exotic fruits on their honeymoon, brought her to release during passionate nights, rubbed her swollen feet during the later stages of pregnancy, and held her full belly as he kissed her belly button while their child kicked energetically. They'd loved her. She'd never have that again...
She curled up on the surprisingly spacious metal bed next to his corpse and snuggled up to him. The cold stiffness of his body was unfamiliar to her, but she didn't care. She needed this.
"You're going to be a Papa again, Trunks-kun," Pan murmured, running her hands over his chest. she didn't care that it was marred from the autopsy, "I'm twelve weeks along, now, and you're missing it all," she began to cry again as she remembered her vow to him over the phone, "I broke my promise. I broke it, and I let you leave. I'm so sorry I didn't make you stay here, where you belong. If I'd gotten there sooner, you'd be alive and you'd be helping me get through this pregnancy... oh kami, baby, I'm just... kami, I let you down..." she lay on top of his body and sobbed...
Her father and Uncle had to bodily remove her from Trunks' body. She'd fought and screamed, trying to get them to understand that she belonged with him, but they dragged her out anyway. A little while after that, she'd fainted, and woke up at home, in her bed. Tika was sleeping, nestled in her side, and Kālu's head was on her hip. When she woke up, they did too, and they had questions; questions that she'd been avoiding for the past week.
"Mama," Tika yawned adorably, rubbing her eyes with her little fists, "how come Papa not here?" Kālu stared up at her with sad blue eyes, and she had to look away, reminded too much of her husband. "Mama, Mama, where's Papa?" the mother bit her lip, looking to the door for help. Her mother stood there, to her relief, and made her way over to the bed.
"Grandma, where's Papa?" Kālu asked in his cute voice, climbing onto her lap. "He's on a trip, Kālu-chan, a very long trip." Videl told him, trying to hide her pain from the little boy. It was so hard, looking at his face. He was his father's son, no doubt. "When is he coming back?" Kālu asked, looking at his mother.
"I don't know, Kālu-chan," Pan said softly, "I just don't know..." Tika's eyes welled up with tears, and she sobbed, "I want Papa!" Pan tried to pick her up and comfort her, but little Tika wasn't having it. She squirmed and kicked at her mother, who groaned in pain as a kick struck her lower abdomen, and escaped from the room, crying at the top of her lungs.
"Mama?" Kālu asked, worried. Why did Mama look like she was hurting? Pan bit back tears as stabbing pains began to erupt in her lower abdomen, "Mama, I need to go to the hospital..." Videl set Kālu down, "Kālu-chan, I need you to keep your Mama company while I go find your Grampa Gohan, okay?" He nodded, "Okay, Grandma." She kissed his forehead and rushed out of the room. Pan tried her best to stay quiet as the pain got worse.
"Mama, are you okay?" Kālu asked softly. "I'm fine, Kālu-chan, just stay calm." Pan replied, stroking his hair, "You look so much like... like him."
Before Kālu could say anything else, his Grampa Gohan had come in, picked his mother up, and rushed out of the room, leaving him confused and sad. His Grandma Bulma came in and picked him up, "Your Mama's going to be fine, Kālu, don't worry."
If they'd been any slower, Pan would've lost the baby. Luckily, Marron was able to stabilize the baby, and warned Pan against trying to soothe any more of Tika's more violent tantrums.
"If she hits you that hard again, the plug's going to be pulled on the little one." Marron said softly, "so be careful." Pan nodded, rubbing her stomach lovingly, "I'll try."
Out in the waiting room, Bra and Videl had given Tika a firm reprimand about hitting her mother, and the little girl was so upset.
"You could've seriously hurt your mother, and that would've been bad, Tika." Videl said softly, "So don't kick her in the tummy anymore. Your little brother or sister could've been hurt badly." Tika's bottom lip quivered, and tears gathered in her eyes, "I sorry... I want my Papa..." Bra's heart broke as the little one began to cry again, and she scooped her up, rocking her gently, "We know, Tika... we know..." A few tears of her own trickled down her cheeks, 'We miss you so much, big brother...'
Half a week later...
Pan stared into the mirror, barely recognizing the woman before her. Thick ringlets of black silk hung to the small of her back, and she was dressed in a black pinstripe pencil skirt with a matching blazer and a navy blue blouse. Her legs were encased in sheer black stockings, and her feet donned a pair of black Yves St. Claire pumps, courtesy of her sister in law. Her makeup was dark and dramatic, and her lips were a deep, wine colored red. She didn't look like Pan at all.
"Ready to go?"
"Yes." Pan turned from the mirror, grabbed her purse, and make her way to the door where her parents waited. Videl was carrying Tika in her arms, and Gohan offered her his hand. She took it, and they made their way down the stairs.
Everyone looked up as the now-widowed wife of Trunks entered the room, and then lowered their gazes respectfully. Kālu took her free hand, and she gave him a soft smile as they headed outside to where the limo waited.
The funeral was a private affair.
Pan didn't want any diplomats, paparazzi, or squealing fan girls destroying the solemnity of her husband's funeral service. She barely paid attention during the service, her eyes focused on the glossy black coffin in front of her, crowned with an array of white roses and violets. A portrait of him was set up next to it, and she took in his smile with both pain and pleasure. This was wrong. So wrong. He shouldn't have died so soon. Her children shouldn't have to bear witness to this... this horrible event. They were too young to understand why their Papa was being placed in the ground.
Goten spoke first, but broke down in the middle of his speech, unable to continue any further. He and Trunks had been so close, closer than even brothers, and Pan's heart broke even more as Bra led him out of the church, whispering comforts in his ear. She felt so selfish, thinking of her own pain when there were others affected by this horrible loss.
Finally, it was her turn to speak, and that podium felt like it was light-years away, rather than a few feet. Her feet felt like blocks of katchin as she walked over to the stage. Uub helped her up the stairs and she took her position in front of the mike. And laughed. Not with humor, no, but with slight hysteria.
"I don't know what to say," she said honestly, "I'm quite sure every here knows what an amazing person my husband was, and what a sneaky little devil he was as a child," she laughed with a bit of humor as smiles colored a few faces, "always dragging poor Goten into whatever adventure he'd thought of. If I remember correctly, they helped my mother find the dragon balls on one occasion... and ended up with Brolli trying to kill them, and my father had to come save them. To this day, no one knows what really happened when Brolli got taken down, but I'd like to believe that Grampa really was there," she gave her parents a small wink, "When I first met Trunks, I was the same age as Tika, and I fell head-over-heels in love with him. I was obsessed. He hated me at first, because, to him, I was just an irritating little brat who followed him everywhere, but he got used to me," this time, there was more laughter, "I didn't really fall in love with him until my last year of high school, when my parents and Bulma forced him to take me to prom because I refused to go with any of the boys at school. We shared our very first kiss that night..."
"We married right after I graduated from med school, and I was 21 at the time. Thanks to my father's genes, I managed to skip a few grades. We honeymooned in outer space, no need for details, and on our one year anniversary, I told him that Kālu was on the way. He was so happy. We came back home and began our life as a married, expectant couple. Four years after that, we were blessed with adorable little Tika."
Pan sighed sadly, "due to... well, this," she frowned at the casket, "he only got two years with our baby girl, six with Kālu, and none with this one," she touched her stomach with a sad grimace, "but he'll always be here... in our hearts, no matter what. We may have lost an amazing man... but Otherworld gained a wonderful angel, and we'll all see him again when our times come, and if I know my husband, he'll definitely be waiting."
Applause broke out, and Pan snapped out of her emotional moment and managed a smile before tears began to fall. Who was she kidding? She had an incredibly long way to go before she could ever manage to talk about Trunks like that without the help of a façade. It took all her will to speak of their life together without breaking down completely, and she knew that tonight was going to be long and painful for her.
The service ended, and the casket was wheeled outside to be loaded into the hearse. The paparazzi and fan girls were outside waiting, held at bay by the SCPD. Pan put on her sunglasses and made her way down to the limo, carrying Tika in her arms with her face tucked into her neck to protect her from the flashing cameras. Gohan and Videl remained on either side of her, with sunglasses of their own. Goten and Bra followed behind them, with Goten carrying Geta Junior and Kālu. Bra held Goku Junior. The police kept them at bay, but that didn't stop the inane questions being hurled at Pan.
"Mrs. Briefs, did you kill Mr. Briefs because he cheated with his secretary?"
"Mrs. Briefs, did Mr. Briefs fake his death and escape to the Bahamas?"
"Mrs. Briefs, is it true that your second child isn't Mr. Briefs'' daughter?"
That did it.
Pan turned on her heel and ripped her sunglasses off, glaring at the paparazzo that dared to question Tika's paternity, "How dare you?! My husband just died, and you ask me that? You have no respect, do you?"
The man holding the camera backed away slightly in the face of her furious outburst, slightly ashamed of his actions, "Uh, Ma'am, I-"
"Save it for someone who gives a crap, you miserable waste of flesh." Vegeta, shockingly, snarled, coming to Pan's defense. Gohan grasped Pan's hand and helped her get into the limo, shielding her from the cameras. She groaned as soon as she was seated, knowing her emotional outburst would be plastered all over the rag sheets by tonight.
"Hey, no worries, if they publish anything, we'll sue them all." Bra grasped her hand and squeezed, "I've got your back, sister." Pan smiled gratefully, "Thank you, sis." They shared a meaningful glanced, and then Bra turned around as the limo pulled away from the curb. Tika fell asleep in her arms, exhausted from the day's events...
*later on that night*
Pan's parents were sleeping in the guest room, and Bra and Goten had taken the second guest room. Tika was in her crib, and Kālu was sharing a bed with his little cousins. Pan was the only one awake right now. She kicked off her shoes and made her way up the stairs and into a room that had remained untouched for nearly two weeks now.
His favorite jacket was still draped across the back of the chair, and she grabbed it and pressed it to her face, inhaling greedily. She draped the jacket over her front and fell asleep in his chair...
Current time...
Pan crawled out of the hold of her father the next morning and went downstairs to heat up some coffee for the both of them, as well as Goten. She also heated up some tea for Bra, who couldn't have coffee. Goten was the first to wake up, and made his way into the kitchen, scratching his hair sleepily.
"Good morning, uncle G." Pan said softly, a small grin on her lips. "Morning niece." He yawned in reply, stretching slightly, "What's for breakfast?" she shrugged, "Don't feel like cooking much... Want to order in?" He shrugged back, "Does it matter?" she nodded in agreement, "Guess not," and went to make the call.
Goten watched her leave with a worried gaze. He knew she was putting up a façade to keep herself together for their sake, but holding it all in wasn't doing her any good. If she kept it up, she would explode, and then they'd be left to pick up of the pieces. He knew his niece well. When she loved, she loved hard, and she didn't know how to release pent up emotion properly when she was hurt.
Pan loved Trunks way more than even he could, and that was saying something. When Bra broke the news to him, a piece of him just died. Part of him just faded away, and he sobbed like a little baby that night, wrapped up in the comforting arms of his wife. The next day, he couldn't help but wonder how his poor niece had reacted, and he worried even more when Bra told that she had been the first to find Trunks after he died.
That day she exploded in the coroner's office, everyone in that room who didn't know how much she loved that man felt the full bore of the intensity of her love for him. It was undeniable that she was completely his, and that he was completely hers.
Ripping her away from his body had been the hardest Goten had ever had to do. She'd bawled and screamed and begged them to leave her there; to let her die with him, but that wouldn't help her, or anyone. When they finally separated her from Trunks's body, Pan just... shut down. She lay limp as they took her from the room, and eventually fainted from the emotion and exhaustion. It was unbearable to witness such a thing.
"Hey, I ordered..." Pan trailed off as Goten's gaze pierced her, "Goten, is something wrong?" He walked over to her and took her in his arms wordlessly. She wrapped her arms around him awkwardly, "Goten, what-" Oh kami, she hadn't been this close to anyone since before... she bit her lip to keep it from trembling as she blinked away tears, "Goten, let me go."
"Not until you let go." She knew immediately that he didn't mean that in the physical sense, "G-Goten, I-" she couldn't speak anymore. Her voice was shaking too badly, and the urge to cry overcame her in a strong wave. She pressed her face into his chest and let it all go.
(A/N: No, she isn't by any means done grieving, but this is good progression for her.)
Pan sobbed, she wailed, she screamed, she bawled. It felt so wonderful to release it all. Goten held her through it all, remaining quiet, even though she felt his tears on her forehead, allowing her wring herself of the emotions she'd been holding back and constantly reining in. she didn't even notice her parents and Bra watching the emotional scene with tears of their own.
*later*
Everyone was laid out of the floor in the living room, eating Japanese takeout for breakfast. Videl sat between Gohan's legs, and Pan's head was resting on her thigh. Goten sat next to Gohan with Bra leaned up against his chest, furiously tucking away her tempura with the ferocity of a pregnant woman.
The TV remained off, because every channel would be talking about the death of Trunks Briefs for the next few months, as well as his poor, poor wife. The fan girls would cry, and then they would set their sights on some new hottie, and Trunks and Pan would be forgotten. Pan could live with that. She was sick of not being able to go out in public without receiving piteous glances from little old ladies, and hateful ones from the fan girls who were convinced that she murdered Trunks.
The trial for his secretary would come up next week, and Pan wasn't sure if she even wanted to go anymore. Sure, she wanted her husband's killer put away for good, but if she went, that would keep her in the headlines as a 'vengeful widow', and if she didn't go, she'd be in the headlines as a 'gold-digging heartless whore'. Or she could sue them all. Yeah, suing sounded good.
It didn't matter, people would talk regardless. The only thing was that didn't give a flying fuck what they thought about her. She dealt with her husband's death in her own way, and if she did or didn't go to that trial, then fuck them all for thinking so lowly of her. It wasn't like they actually knew her, for crying out loud. That was her hugest pet peeve; people thinking they know someone who they've watched from afar because they didn't congregate in the same social circles; nor would they ever, and it made her absolutely sick.
"You okay, Panny?" Bra placed a hand on her leg.
"I will be." Pan answered honestly. It would take some time and effort, but she would heal and be happy again for the sake of her children. After all, that would be what Trunks would want her to do. But until then, she would have to roll with the punches and take the good and the bad days as they came.
She had a baby to prepare for in the next six and a half months, and a life to live. She couldn't stop living because of this loss, no matter how huge, because her babies needed her. Raising three kids without a husband was going to be, no doubt, her biggest challenge yet, but she was ready to try and take it down.
I'm going to try, Trunks, Pan said silently, I know you'd want me to at least try before I give in, and I will. For our children... and for me, too. For second, she could almost imagine that Trunks was looking down on her, and she knew he was smiling.
So, it's not quite a sad ending, but not that happy either. There are no dragon balls, hence the reason why Trunks stayed dead, and either way, I think an allergic reaction would count as a natural death, because you can't help what you're allergic to, because it's genetic. I want to include a second chapter with the trial, and the arrival of the baby, but I think those things are better left said than done. I feel like I laid things on a little too thick, so don't be afraid to let me know if you agree. Did you cry or tear up during any of this?
I used the Kübler-Ross "Five Stages of Grief" but I didn't use Bargaining or Acceptance, or Denial for that matter, unless you count the scene where Pan was talking to Trunks' body. Pan's not at the point where she can accept his death, and I don't think I can handle writing any more of this without having an emotion meltdown. Bargaining had no place in this shot, because what would she be bargaining for if he's already dead?
The part where Trunks knew something was going to happen, and Pan's sense of foreboding, that stuff is real. I've seen people predict bad things like death or accidents before, just based on a feeling. Trunks' hinting was a bit too obvious, but I didn't know how to make it more subtle. It's not like you didn't know he was going to die, either. R&R, guys. Much Love, SukiChan12^-^