Gone
When you are nobody, anyone can make you feel like somebody.
I was left on the porch of a very small orphanage. I was wrapped in a single piece of newspaper. It was the coldest night of the year, and my so called mother couldn't even ring the doorbell. I was out in the cold until morning. The doctor said I was a miracle baby. This was the kind of statement which would get adopted by a nice family with high standers. Never the less this is my life a crap shit life.
I was adopted by a woman who soon after joined a polygamous colt. At the age of five I was returned when she got pregnant. Sent back like an unwanted toy. At ages six to nine a lived with a family who worshiped stars. I wound up back at the orphanage when they all drink poison soda. They wanted to see the sun god face to face. I choice life no matter how crappy it was. At age twelve I was adapted by a man. Which brings me to where I am now?
He has a beautiful family he showed me a picture of them. There smiling faces were so inviting and great. I later found out I would never meet the happy people in the picture. Instead I would be his personal whipping girl. If his wife upset him I got every hit. He said he never wanted to bourse her face, but my face was okay.
"Hana!" he's shouting my name, he must have had a bad day with the wife.
"Hana!" I can hear the anger in his voice. I can feel his hand hitting my face even though he hasn't touched me. I can feel the warn tears running down my face.
"Don't you hear me calling you? You can just go around doing what ever you want!" I scream and a hit. My face turns all the way around. I can see the wall. I wish he would just bash my head in.
"I work all day so you can have everything you want! But one time I don't give you what you want and you fucking sleep with someone else! You lousy bitch!" every word is followed by hit. I close my eyes and wish his wife would die. I think my jaw might be broken. I want to die but I know he won't kill me.
"Clean your self off. You have school tomorrow." He wiped his hands in a handkerchief and left the room. I must be dead; I think he just said school. Home school is fun gives me a chance to heal.
I hadn't been outside in three years and now I was standing in front a brown brick building. The girls with there bright smiles and new clothes bounced into the building. The boys stood around talking and tossing a football around. Some of them are cute. I pull my books close to my chest and walk silently into the building. This is weird but I think one of the guys is looking at me.
The office is close to the door which is great. I can see the girls turning up their noises at my clothes. I was wearing a fade pair jeans and a plain white tee which was more beige than white from the constant washes. My old and beaten up black converse were at the point of leaving me bare foot in the street. My hair was to short for a ponytail so it just hung in my face hiding my sky blue eyes, which looked odd in contrast with my dark skin.
I hurried into the office. The woman behind the desk looked at me as though a criminal had entered the room. She greeted me like one too.
"We don't keep cash in the building so you can leave." She fanned her hands at me like she was shooing a dog.
"That's fine I already knock over the liquor store, I am here to go to school." I tried so hard not to smile at the look she was giving me. I took out my letter and placed it on her desk.
"Well good for you. Hana… do you have a last name?" she asked me something which made me think back to a time when I wished I had parents. I use to sit and imagine my real parents rescuing me from the hell which had become my life. After a while I figured the must have been horrible people to leave me to die. I prayed every night that they could never had any more children after what they did to me.
"No just Hana." I shrugged my shoulders and looked down. I felt some tears burning my eyes.
Thanks for reading please tell me what you think.