The smile with sadness lingered. It wasn't that she wasn't happy to have returned to Tokyo, but that the journey to this point in Rei's life had been a long one and she had once had no intentions of going back.

However, Usagi's insistence that Mamoru had a right to know about his son was right. Rei had had four years to gain peace about her past, yet she had never dealt with Mamoru's role in her son's life. At first, it simply hadn't been an option, living so far away. Now, it lingered as fear, for herself and for Eien.

Eien was a good child, healthy and happy, and eternally curious. His quiet understanding had caught Rei off guard from the first moment she became aware of it, and Rei believed her son was an old soul. There were parts of him, his temper, that were obviously Rei, and others that reminded her of her grandfather. It was his eyes, however, that belonged to Mamoru.

Would Mamoru know his son? Would he accept him and love him? Would he be angry with Rei, would he accuse her of things she could not bear to be accused of or try to take Eien away from her? Oh, she would never survive if she lost her son!

The knots of worry in Rei's stomach clenched at the thought. Taking a deep breath, she focused instead on the stairs belonging to her childhood home, and grasped her son's hand. Usagi stared at the steps in front of them, her arms full of luggage, then met Rei's eyes.

"Well, there's less of them here than at your old place. This should be a cake walk in comparison. Come on!"

--------

The temple was silent, a fact Rei had been expecting. After being gone for so long and being so isolated, Rei had learned to appreciate the quiet. The temple, however, was deep in the city, and it was apparent that her grandfather had worked hard to make the grounds like an oasis in the desert, a place where those in need of peace would easily be able to quench their spiritual thirst. It needed work now, however. The years without anyone to tend to it had left the weeds to become overgrown and the temple and house were dusty and stale.

Eien seemed to know he was home for good, and ran around the grounds, peeking into the temple and attached house excitedly. Rei yelled at her son to be careful as Usagi walked to the temple, and lowering the luggage to the ground, wiped a hand on her forehead, grinning at Eien's exuberance.

Rei sighed nostalgically. "I remember being like that when I would come to visit my grandfather. I always loved coming here as a child. The last visit was about six months before my mother became ill and died, and my father brought me here to live. It's a shame I took advantage of it when I came for good."

"I always thought you were pretty lucky to live here, all of us did. Do you want some help cleaning things up?"

"No, I'll manage just fine. There's not much work to do inside, just some dusting away four years of dirt. The outside can wait until I decide if we're here for good."

Usagi frowned. "You're planning on going back?"

Rei shrugged. "I don't exactly know how all this with Mamoru is going to go, and I was really happy where we were. My intention is to see how it plays out and decide later."

"I hope you stay, Rei," Usagi replied, placing a hand on her friend's shoulder, " and I'm glad you've come back. I missed you."

Rei laughed. "You miss coming over to eat my food and borrow my stuff!"

"You always did have the best comic books." Usagi looked around the grounds. "I guess I'll leave you to clean up, then. Will you call me when you're done?"

Rei nodded, already deep in thought as she planned out the next few days.

"I'll talk to you when you're ready."

As the sound of Usagi's footsteps faded into the background of her thoughts, Rei scanned the grounds, finally focusing on the house. There was more work to be done than what she told Usagi. Juggling cleaning and settling in with a four year old would be hard, but Rei had managed before and knew she would manage again.

----------

Three days passed faster than Rei thought they could but the house cleaning was complete. She'd had a rough time with Eien at the beginning, but soon had him settled down and willing to help. The personal mementos of her life remained in the background as she tore the house apart and cleaned every inch of her childhood home. It was only after she was done, standing in the living room, the windows still open to the spring air, that brought back the reality of where she was and why.

She settled Eien into one of the spare bedrooms which neither she nor her grandfather had ever used, allowing him to place his own imprint on the space. Rei herself moved into the master suite, the bedroom her grandfather had once occupied.

Since his death two years previous, there had been no one to go through his things and they had remained untouched until Rei's return.

Rei looked around the bedroom, remembering the life her grandfather had lived in the space.

She saw him in her memories, the proud but eccentric Shinto priest, the doting father, the spoiling grandfather, and then firm but loving disciplinarian as she grew into a tempestuous teenager. She knew he had loved his family fiercely, that her mother's sudden death nearly killed him, and that he was the only father she had truly known. With his help, she had fled Cherry Hill Temple, but she knew her leaving had hurt him. When she learned of his sudden death not long after Eien's first birthday, Rei mourned for her grandfather deeply. Returning to the temple, knowing he would not be there to see his grandson, had broken her heart, and Rei mourned the loss all over again in his empty bedroom.

That same afternoon, she tackled her own childhood bedroom, which ended up taking longer than she had expected. Each item seemed to bring back some sort of memory. She found herself laughing over some memories, and crying over others, until she realized how much she had changed in such a short time.

She'd been a stupid child, even at the ripe old age of 21, when she had that one night stand with Mamoru. Rei chuckled with embarrassment as she recalled how grown up she had thought herself at that age. Having Eien, suddenly being responsible for someone else all the time, learning how to be selfless instead of selfish, had forced Rei to reign in on her temper and self-centeredness. When he hurt, she felt it. When Eien was happy, she was elated.

Introducing him to Mamoru terrified her, but she knew it was the right thing to do. Mamoru needed to know he had a son, and he had a right to decide his role in Eien's life. Eien needed a father, to at least know who he was and what brought them together.

-------------

"Where are we going, Mommy?"

Rei stopped walking, and looked down at her son. His face was curious, but he had picked up on her worry, too, she could tell. Rei kneeled to Eien's level.

"Eien, one day when you're grown up with a family of your own, you're either thank me or curse me for what I've done. I've been a bad mommy."

Eien laughed. "Bad mommy! You're never bad!"

"Sweetie, we're going to meet your daddy. Do you remember what a daddy is?"

"A daddy is someone who loves you just as much as a mommy, 'cept he's a boy!"

"That's right! A daddy is someone who loves their little boys and girls just like mommies do. Sometimes, Eien, when little babies are born, the mommy or daddy aren't there to love them. Sometimes they just.. can't. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

Eien nodded silently.

"When I had found out that you were going to be my little baby, your daddy didn't know, and he still doesn't know. It's been my little secret all this time. But, see, Eien, your daddy SHOULD know. He needs to know how wonderful you are, how happy you make Mommy. Do you want to see your daddy and show him what a good little boy you are?"

"I get to see my daddy?"

Rei wiped a tear from her eye and nodded. "Do you.. want to, Eien?"

Eien jumped with excitement. "Yeah!"

"Alright then, come on, we'll be late if we don't hurry. But Eien.. promise me something, okay? Your daddy doesn't know that he's your daddy, and he might be angry with me for not telling him about you. He might not want to see you again. Promise me you won't be mad at him. It's me you should be angry at, okay?"

"Okay," Eien replied solemnly.

Rei stood and smoothed her skirt, taking Eien's hand in hers as they walked. She was wiping her eyes and straightening her hair when they turned a corner. In front of them Usagi and Mamoru appeared, her hand in his. She wore a smile, bright yet anxious, and he seemed happy to see her but confused. Rei, too, forced herself to smile and unconsciously tightened her grip on her son's hand.

Usagi opened her arms wide, and Rei stepped happily into them. It was the first time she had done that since seeking Rei out, and Rei immediately felt calmed by her touch.

Mamoru smiled. "My god, Rei Hino. After all this time, here you are, back in Tokyo."

"It's good to see you, Mamoru. You look.. as handsome as you did the last time I saw you."

Mamoru grinned and then bent down to look at Eien. "And who is this?"

"This is my son, Eien."

"Your... son?"

Rei hesitated for a second, gathering up her courage to speak. She looked into Eien's blue eyes. "OUR son."

"Our? Where is your hus - Oh."

Mamoru's reaction to hearing what Rei was saying showed in a myriad of emotions. He took a long, shuddering breath before loosening his grip on Usagi's hand and stepped away, turning his back to them. His right hand went up to his hair, pushing it back from his forehead.

When he turned around, the look of anguish he wore nearly broke Rei's heart.

"Why?"

"We were friends. You were getting married. I didn't want to mess things up."

"I would have been there for you!"

"It wasn't your responsibility," Rei whispered. "It was my mistake, my burden."

"Why did you run away?"

"I was scared. You had just gotten married, I didn't think I had any other options."

"I would have been there for you, for him."

Rei smiled sadly. "What would you have done, Mamoru? Left Usagi and married me instead to save the day? Ruined her life AND yours? I'm sorry to say, but I would have made you miserable and you'd never get over Usagi. It wouldn't have worked out. Besides, I was fine, he was fine. We've been okay, Mamoru."

She sighed.

"I had four years to gain peace about this. I had that time, alone, to know and understand what happened and why. I came back because Usagi made me see that you never knew, that you have a right to know you have a son. I came back because my son needed to know he has a father and a chance to meet him, even if you decide you want nothing to do with him. I owe it to you, both of you."

Usagi, a mere spectator until this moment, bent down to Eien, who happily settled into his godmother's embrace. "He has your eyes, have you noticed that?"

Mamoru took a shuddering breath. "He looks like his mother."

"Your son, Mamoru, is the most amazing thing to happen in my life. He is the most loving, wonderful person I know. It's time you learned that for yourself."

Mamoru bent down beside Usagi, crouching near eye level to his son. His bottom lip trembled as he smiled at Eien.

"Hello, Eien. I'm your dad. Welcome home."

End

AN: I love "Climb Every Mountain" because of the surprise arrival of Eien, but when I reread it, I found myself realizing that it just.. ends. It doesn't really resolve the issue of Rei + Mamoru = son that scared Rei so much that she ran away to a temple in the jungle. A wise man once said you can never go home again and that's true for Rei on so many levels. It takes a while getting to the main point of this story, but I like Rei settling in. I left Eien silent as much as possible, simply because children are hard to write, either because people write young children as smarter/more mature/older than they are or sickeningly sweet stereotypes.