Be All Right
by Seruyamon (Cyllya)
Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon or the song called 'Be All Right' by Konishi Hiroko.
Note: This is a 02 songfic based on a 01 song. So sue me[Line not to be taken seriously]. I didn't bother translating the song, because most of the lyrics were put into the story line. If you haven't figured out who's narrating by the time the first paragraph is over, you don't know enough about Digimon to be reading fanfiction, especially since the song should tell you.
WARNING!:
This contains yaoi/shounen ai! That means boy/boy stuff!-------------------------
Mom let me spend the night at my dad's apartment so I could spend more time with Matt. There was a bunk bed in Matt's room for just such occasions, and I slept on top. The alarm clock rang; Matt's clock most likely has the most annoying buzzing sound in the history of alarm clocks. I heard Matt groan and roll over, trying to ignore it.
He failed, however, due to the bothersome sound of the alarm. He sat up and, with one fast swipe of his hand, sent the clock flying to the far side of the room, unplugging it from the electric outlet in the process. The buzzing stopped, and Matt collapsed back onto his pillow.
Kesa mo mata nemui me kosutte,
While this was happening, I was just waking up. I yawned, stretched, and rubbed my eyes, like every morning. I heard the sound of the clock smacking into the wall, slowly brought my hands from my eyes, and blinked at it. Matt must have had a long day yesterday. I climbed halfway down the bed's ladder and jumped onto the floor. I pushed at my brother.
He groaned again, rolled over enough to look at me, mumbled, "Good morning," and rolled back.
Genki ni, "Waraou!"
I energetically said, "Laugh!" and laughed myself. He looked at me strangely but finally gave into my good mood and dragged himself out of bed.
Atama ga ne yume no tsuzuki mitai,
Ha migaki shiteta.
As Matt and I made our way to the bathroom, I thought back to the dream I'd been having before I woke up. It was a weird dream, and there's no way it'd ever be reality. Yet I liked it anyway, because I liked to imagine it could have been real. The coolest thing was about to happen, but then I was rudely interrupted by that stupid clock, which I'm pretty sure ranks #1 on "The List of the World's Top Ten Most Annoying Sounds."
Yet dreams are for nighttime, and it was day now. It was time for the dream to be ignored, but my head felt like it was still part of it as I brushed my teeth.
"You know I care for you, Takeru. I love you."
What I wouldn't give to hear that for real. But the object of my affection had a major crush on someone else and wasn't being the least bit shy about it. Oh well, I still had my dreams.
-------------------------
Davis, Cody, Yolei, Kari, and I went to the DigiWorld after school, and just my luck I'd be an emotional wreck by the time I got home. I'd been in denial for so long, thinking that even though I was in love, we could go on being friends and I'd never have to say anything.
That night I stood on the balcony of my apartment, staring down at nothing in particular, as I thought. It was so hard to go though life day by day, seeing that person every day, and never say anything.
"…so brave, so determined, so everything…" I mumbled, "So everything but mine…."
Mahou wo tsukaeru you ni,
Nagareboshi ni onegai wo,
I turned my head upward, toward the stars. Their twinkling sort of possessed me for a few minutes as I thought. I saw a shooting star.
"I wish…" I mumbled, thinking, "I wish I could use magic." Magic could solve all my problems. Magic is suppose to make people fall in love.
Tama ni namida ga dechau,
Sou kuyashii kara,
I dropped to my knees and starting crying, as I'd occasionally done before with less severity. It was all just so vexing! I could feel a hole growing inside me because of my emptiness.
Bokura no waarudo hitori ja nai,
Demo akogare datte chanto motteru,
Suashi no mama de ireba kitto be all right
We—myself and other people in my situation—are not alone in our world. I have my ambitions, my yearnings. If we stay barefoot, I'm sure we'll be alright.
-------------------------
The other DigiDestined and I went to a carnival the next day; Kari and Yolei insisted that we all needed a break. Kari must have had a long day at school, because it didn't take her long to start trudging wearily beside me. We'd had gone on a few rides with just the two of us and our Digimon after the others went off to do their own thing. Then our Digimon went off someplace too, and I could do little more than pray that they weren't getting in to trouble.
The two of us passed Matt and Tai who were over in the designated food area. They were sitting at the table eating something, but Matt said something that made Tai blush lightly. He hugged Matt, seemingly oblivious to my brother's protests.
Matt has this thing against getting mushy in public, but Tai wouldn't let go. So by the time we were close enough to say hi, they were either too busy hugging or trying to stop hugging.
Kari and I looked at each other and laughed lightly at my brother's futile squirmy attempts to free himself before continuing.
"Where do you want to go next?" I asked.
"I can't control my stomach when I'm tired," Kari answered, yawning as if to provide proof of her fatigue, "Let's try a nice slow ride."
"How about the Ferris wheel?" I suggested, "It's closest."
"Okay," Kari mumbled.
The Ferris wheel wasn't exactly the most exiting ride in the carnival, so there wasn't a line save the small amount of people waiting for the next ride to be over.
When it was our turn to board the Ferris wheel, I heard someone call, "Room for three?" The little booth, or whatever it was, was only made for two, but the teenager controlling the wheel seemed too tired and exasperated to stop Davis from pushing his way in.
Davis, just what I needed. He grinned mockingly at me when I sighed a bit louder than I'd meant to. It figured that he'd do everything in his power to keep Kari and me apart, though I think he was wasting his effort miserably.
Kanransha choujou tsuitara,
Sora made chikai yo,
Onaji sora takusan no hito wo,
Mamotte iru ne.
"Hi, Kari," he said, "Hey, TJ."
I sighed, "Hey."
"Hi, Davis," Kari mumbled sleepily.
"So what's up?" he asked.
Kari mumbled something incoherently.
"Sky and such," I answered.
"Hah, hah," Davis said sardonically.
"Better enjoy the sky, Davis," Kari said quietly, "With all the trouble it the DigiWorld, it may not be there tomorrow."
Davis winced, most likely upset that she'd stuck up for my cliched joke. He turned his gaze aimlessly toward the lower half of the wall in front of him. I couldn't see his expression well, but it looked like he was thinking a thought he despised.
After a few minutes of staring at him, I asked, "What's wrong?"
He looked up at me, startled, and glanced at Kari. He sighed, returned his gaze to its previous position with a tired expression, and said, "Kari's right. The DigiWorld is messed up. For all we know, the world will end tomorrow, and here we are doing nothing about it."
"Don't give up on the world now," I said laughingly, "We did what we had to in the DigiWorld today. If we're in that bad of shape that the world might end tomorrow, then there's nothing we can do about it tonight." He looked at me with a scowl, but I leaned back assuredly and said, "So we should have a little fun with our last few hours."
He looked at me blankly for a few seconds. He laughed, looked back downward, and said, "Odd words coming from someone riding a Ferris wheel."
"You shouldn't talk," I laughed, "You're riding this Ferris wheel too."
Davis gave a light laugh, glanced at Kari again, and quietly said, "I had my reasons."
I looked at her and saw she was asleep. Most likely she had been that way since telling Davis the world could end tomorrow.
Ashita mo kyou ga tsuzuku no?
Negaeba kitto tsuzuku yo ne.
After what felt like a long period of silence, Davis, still looking downward, quietly asked, "Will today continue tomorrow?"
"If we wish for it," I answered, "surely it will."
Davis looked up at me with an unreadable expression. His face slowly faded into a small smile, so I widened mine.
I guess we finally understood each other a little more.
-------------------------
Having been unable to wake Kari up, Davis and I each draped one of Kari's arms over our shoulders and carried her to where we hoped Matt and Tai still were. They were still there, but they were standing. Tai looked about to lunge forward, and Matt was slowly backing away while holding out a plastic eating utensil.
"Seriously, man, I have a spork, and I know how to use it!" Matt declared.
Tai burst out laughing and was soon forced to sit back down. Matt moved his chair out of Tai's arm's reach and sat down as well. Davis and I looked at them, sweatdropping.
Matt noticed us and said, "Don't ask."
"Don't worry, I won't," Davis said. We moved Kari toward the third chair, and Davis pulled it out with his foot. We sat her in it and leaned her on the table.
"Hope you don't mind us dumping your unconscious little sister on you, Tai," I said.
Tai gradually stopped laughing and continued to smile. He wiped his eyes dry and asked, "What happened to her?"
"Nothing, she's just tired," I answered.
Tai nodded, "Okay. See ya guys later."
"'Kay, bye," Davis said. I gave a single wave to them as the two of us walked off. After a few minutes of wandering aimlessly through the carnival, Davis casually asked, "What do you think made her so tired? You'd think she didn't get any sleep last night."
I shrugged, "Beats me."
"I figured she'd tell you something like that," Davis asked.
"Why?"
"You two seem pretty close."
I shrugged again and said, "If you're worried, you might ask Gatomon."
"You're not closer to her than Gatomon is?" he asked.
"No," I said, "What, you think we're dating or something?"
"Are you?"
"No."
"Why not?"
I looked at him quizzically. He looked at me like it were a normal question that he wanted answered, so I said, "Why so?"
Davis gave a 'hmph' sound. He said, "I know you like her."
"Really?" I asked dully, "Everyone else says the same thing."
It was his turn to look quizzical. He asked, "Don't you?"
"Not the way everyone thinks I do," I said as I stopped walking. He stopped walking to listen to me, and I continued, "Kari's really nice and all. I do care about her, and I won't deny that she's pretty, but she's too much like a sister to me. She's a great friend, but I have trouble seeing myself kiss her."
He didn't stop me, so I said, "Everyone expects us to like each other. They think we're destined for each other or something. I wish they wouldn't think that, because I don't like her that way."
"Everyone thinks that?" Davis asked, "And it's not true?"
"No!" I snapped, my eyes welling up with tears, "I don't like her that way, and I know she feels the same way! I just wish everyone would shut up about it! Why should we like each other? Just 'cause everybody thinks we're 'destined' for each other? Just because we both have angel Digimon?!"
"Hey, TK, calm down!" Davis snapped, "What kind of person makes people stare while saying they don't have a crush on someone?!"
"Someone who likes a person they aren't destined for!" I snapped as I continued walking. Davis fell into step next to me, probably sensing a new way to annoy me.
"Really?" he asked, "You like someone else? Who is it?"
"Never mind," I said firmly.
"Come on, tell me!" he grinned, "Does Kari know?"
"Maybe," I said, "She's like Sora and has a sixth sense about that sorta thing."
"Well, who is it?" he asked again.
"I'm not telling you."
"Why not?"
"Because neither of us want you to know—'neither of us' meaning you and me."
"I'll ask Kari if you won't tell me!"
"Go ahead. She won't tell you."
"How do you know?"
"Because I've known her longer than you have, so I know her well."
"What about Sora?"
"She won't tell you either."
"How come I wouldn't want to know?"
"You just wouldn't," I said, "Trust me." I looked up at the perfectly cloudless night sky. There'd be nice weather tomorrow, which was Saturday, but I wouldn't enjoy it if I didn't get Davis off my back.
Ashita tenki ni naare yume made todoke,
Teruteru bouzu to nakayoku narou,
"Is it Yolei?"
"What? No."
"I didn't think so," he said, "Anyone I know?"
"Yeah."
"Why won't you tell me? I can handle it."
"I won't say."
"Then—"
"I won't write it down either."
"Then let me know some other way! Use your imagination!"
I stopped walking, spread my arms in exasperation, and demanded, "What do you want me to do?! Go up and kiss the poor person?!"
"Sure, why not?" he grinned.
"You'd hate me if you knew," I insisted.
"No, I wouldn't."
"Yes, you would."
"Would not."
"Would to."
"Would not."
"Would to."
"Would not."
"Would to."
"Would not!" he said firmly, "I promise!"
"You promise you won't hate me for it?" I asked.
"I promise!"
"You're sure?"
"I promise!" he repeated, standing straighter and putting his hand over his heart.
I opened my mouth, paused, and said, "I'll think about it." I kept walking. He kept arguing with me, and I finally gave up. I stopped walking again.
Hora akushu wo sureba ishindenshin,
"Promise me again," I said.
"I promise I won't hate you, no matter who you have a crush on," he vowed. He held out his hand. I shook it but didn't let go. The handshake must have been slightly telepathic, because his eyebrows raised a little as I look him in the eyes.
Following his suggestion, I leaned forward and kissed my crush. His eyes widened. I pulled back and said, "See?! Happy now?! Everyone assumes I love her, but I don't! I never did! I love you! Happy now, I love you!"
He just stared.
My previously loud voice was lowered to a harsh whisper. "All this time I've had this emptiness inside of me, just eating away at my insides, getting bigger and bigger! And everyone—everyone! Even Patamon—expected me to fill it with her! But I don't love her so it'll stay that way until it swallows me up. My hope is all I have left, but it won't take long for that to be gone too! I can feel myself fading away!" I let out a sobbing sound as the tears I'd fought to keep from falling rolled down my face. I finally let go of his hand and stomped off.
-------------------------
Kimi mo egao wo misete,
I was sitting on a bench sideways with my legs stretched out on it. The bench was near a popcorn stand, so it wasn't surprising that I had a small box of popcorn. There were still a lot of people around though the crowds were thinning. I heard footsteps that didn't match the rhythm of the others and instantly knew who was behind me.
"T-TK?" Davis asked quietly.
"What do you want?" I asked coldly, not looking at him.
I heard him shuffle his feet nervously. To my complete and utter shock, he bent down and kissed my cheek. I turned my head to look at him. He didn't look like he was joking.
"I thought you liked Kari," I said.
He shrugged and said, "I was over her a long time ago, I just… didn't want to look like I was giving up. You know me, I don't quit."
"Nah," I said. He hesitated and kissed me again, on the lips this time.
I was still having troubled believing he was serious, but I kissed him back anyway.
"Let me see you smile," he said to me.
I smiled, embraced him, and said, "Please don't leave me."
"Don't worry," he said, "I can't leave you, I need you."
Kitto be all right.
"It'll surely be alright," I said. I kissed him desperately. When I hugged him again, I saw Kari standing casually near a distant cotton candy stand. She winked, gave me the 'thumbs up' sign, and walked out of view.
Ashita tenki ni naare yume made todoke,
Teruteru bouzu to nakayoku narou,
Hora akushu wo sureba ishindenshin,
Kimi mo egao wo misete,
Zutto be all right...
"It'll always be alright," Davis said.
^^^^^
Whatcha think? I know not everyone likes those 'happy ending fics' but if people didn't hope for happy endings, what would they have to hope for? This wasn't a very dark fic, but I think it was darker than I thought it'd be if you consider the song. Megchan's Digimon Sekai (www.megchan.com/digmon) has the translations to that song if you're desperate to know what it means. ^_^ Ja ne, minna-san!
—Seruyamon
WAIT! WAIT! Don't go yet!
I wanted to post this in the "Originals/Short Stories" section, but FFN doesn't count lists as fics.
So here goes!
The List of the World's Top Ten Most Annoying Sounds
by Cyllya/Seruyamon
10. Dogs barking at things they shouldn't be barking at.
09. The static sound of a messed up TV or telephone.
08. The "This is a test of the emergency broadcasting system" tones.
07. The gooey sound made by school cafeteria food as it glops onto your plate…
06. The voice of someone you don't get a long with.
05. Belching.
04. Artificial fart sounds.
03. The tone of voice used by disapproving figures of authority.
02. Real fart sounds.
01. An alarm clock's ring/buzz.