Disclaimer: I do not InuYasha or any of its characters.
Warning: This work of fiction contains mature elements that may be uncomfortable to some readers. Please, continue reading with discretion.
Dope
Chapter: 1
I'm high.
High on my makeup. High on my long black nails. High on my gold bedazzled Versace bodysuit and white knee-highs. High on the crowd screaming my name. And another, drug-induced high.
All I feel is ecstasy.
As I sit in my dressing room looking at myself in the mirror, I know I'm not the same girl I was three years ago. I am no longer the girl who cares about others more than herself. No longer the girl who has fun at school and has lots of friends. No longer the girl who turns down dates from boys because she's too modest. And no longer the girl who jumps through a well and into feudal Japan, saving the world at the side of a half-demon. That girl doesn't exist anymore. The girl staring back at me has dull, bloodshot eyes, smeared with black makeup and glazed over with sadness and regret. Her once curved lips fall down into a pathetic grimace, and her once full body is now fragile and emaciated.
But still, the ecstasy of the high bubbles into my brain and a small smile creeps onto my lips. "I am happy…" I try to convince myself and I pull the band around my upper arm tighter with my teeth, grabbing the syringe and filling it again with my happiness, placing it against the inside of my arm.
"Excuse me, Miss Higurashi, but you're on in three minutes." The shy stage worker stands at my door, looking down at his feet as to not intrude upon my private escapades.
I sigh and place the needle down. "I guess this will have to wait." Untying the band around my arm, I toss it on top of the syringe and stand slowly, making my way toward the door. "Don't act like you didn't see what I was doing. It's no secret to anybody." My voice curdles in my throat.
"Please, I'm sorry, Miss Higurashi." He places a finger to the microphone set on his head. "Two minutes, Miss Higurashi."
"Lock this door behind you, would you honey? I don't want anybody stealing my stash." I saunter past him and make my way down the long corridor to the stage door. My body feels numb and my brain buzzes as the cheering of the crowd grows louder and louder.
Behind the stage door are dozens of stage crew members, my costume coordinators, my hair and makeup artist Nori, and my manager Katashi. Nori approaches me first, touching up my face and chest, and layering my hair with a few heavy doses of hairspray. "You look amazing, as always, thanks to my talented handy work." She smiles genuinely at me. "But you're beautiful even without the costume makeup, Kagome."
All I can muster in response is a weak smile. Nori's happiness quickly fades and she gathers her things and steps aside. I move over to where a handful of stage workers are waiting to get me situated securely onto a rising platform, the platform that would soon lift me into the sights of the thousands of screaming fans above me. Their cheers ring in my ears now and my brain bubbles again, causing a grin to flash upon my face. "30 seconds!" I hear somebody call from afar.
Katashi approaches me now, and the bubbles quickly subside. He grasps my jaw gently in one of his hands and turns my face to look at him. I can hear Nori protesting in the defense of my makeup. His eyes bare into mine and a devious smirk appears across his strong face. Looking at him makes me feel lovingly protected, yet sick to my stomach.
He gives a small pat against my cheek. "You will be wonderful, as always, Hachiko."
Hachiko. Faithful dog. That became his nickname for me about six months after he found me. He said it was because I was always at his beck and call, like a dog loyal to its master. Back then, he promised me happiness, and I guess I was a dog who wanted to be happy.
"I know." I respond without a sliver of emotion in my voice.
He hand travels down my face and neck, across my shoulder, and down onto my arm, where he harshly grasps the indentation that the band left on my skin. I wince mentally, but to his disappointment, show no physical reaction. His face retracts into a scowl and he opens his mouth as if to contest.
"10 seconds!"
Katashi drops his hand and turns away to take his place beside Nori.
"9…"
I turn to look at them both. Nori is wearing her always radiant smile, gesturing to me a small thumbs up.
"8…"
Katashi has both hands in his pockets, glaring at me with hard eyes.
"7…"
I coyly bite my bottom lip. He always likes it when I bite my lip. It's a sign to him that I want him. A sign that I'm ready to submit to him.
"6…"
And even when I don't want him, I bite my lip, because that's what faithful dogs do to keep their masters happy.
"5…"
Katashi's scowl retreats and a scheming smirk takes its place. A sign he's planning to have his way with me later.
"4…"
I redirect my attention to the screaming crowd.
"3…"
The bubbles in my brain return.
"2…"
The platform begins its ascension, lifting me up through the stage and into the eyes of my adoring audience. The screams grow louder. The flashes of light are bright and colorful. My heart is pounding. And as those first bass lines resonate in my ears...
"1…"
Ecstasy.
This is who I am now.
A/N: Updates for this story will be dependent upon its success, which I will judge after uploading a few more chapters. I appreciate both praise and constructive criticism for my work. Thank you.
-Toasty