"And wouldn't you believe what that hag said to me? To me? Five time winner of Herbologist Monthly's Best Mandrake Award?!" Harry Potter could absolutely guess. In fact he had a few choice words for the dumb bitch himself. Of course since it started with avada and ended with kedavra…it might not be best for his continued freedom to say them.
"Madam, please, would you just tell me if this man-" jabbing at a poster of a rather unwashed looking fellow, "-was anywhere near this street in the last few hours?"
"Who?"
"The man in the poster."
"What man?"
"In the poster."
"Wot?"
"Poster."
"That is not a man."
"Slytherin's mangy arse crack woman would you just tell me if you've seen him or not?!" Harry finally burst out, wand shooting sparks at his side.
"Well I never!" The woman gave him an offended glare.
"Never? Never what? Had the brains God gave a goat?" The woman swelled up as if to let loose a tirade of magnificence, but choked suddenly. She went cross eyed looking at the wand tip right twixt her eyes.
"Now. Poster. Man. Or I turn your head into a pumpkin. A very ugly pumpkin.
"Mimblterip"
"Bless you." Harry ground out.
"N-no. T-that….it's a woman." The old biddy stuttered.
"You're fucking with me." Harry looked at the poster and at the truly hairy gargoyle pictured on it.
"Oh no! That's Clearhara Maplewizz. Twice winner of International Magical Crossdressers. Do you know Dumbledore won the prize before she did?" She babbled.
"Nevermind. You know what. Here's five galleons. Have a drink on me."
Harry turned around and trudged slowly away. The very picture of defeat.
"Hmm what an odd little fellow. Perhaps I should offer him some of my prize winning Cheerisias?"
Fin