The Flight

The door swung open, revealing to her the familiar sight of mayhem. The Mindelans were a large family; their get-togethers were always so chaotic, one could hardly help feeling overwhelmed by the sheer atmosphere. The young boys who had answered the door barely spared her a look before they ran off again, up the stairs to cause an uncle or two some trouble. Keladry thought for a half-moment about calling them back, but then reconsidered it, realising the futility.

Stepping inside and closing the door behind her, she walked through to the end of the hallway. It led to a large kitchen, cool and airy and full of memories both happy and sad. Her mother sat around a long island with her elder sisters, folders and sheets in front of them as they discussed wedding plans. They paid her entrance no notice, forcing her to draw their attention with a weak cough.

"Oh, it's you," the eldest remarked snidely, raking her eyes over her clothes with disdain. Kel shifted on the spot awkwardly; Patricine was a snob and a half, but she was adored by the other girls. A clear mark of her seniority. "Decided to come home then?"

"Not quite," Kel murmured in response, fidgeting with the corner of her shirt. "May I speak with Ma?"

"Not right now, Keladry," her mother replied dismissively. "I'm far too busy at the moment. I'm sure whatever you have to say can wait."

And with that, she was immediately ignored again, cast to the sidelines as they turned away from her. "It's ok," she mumbled, despite knowing that they weren't listening. "I'll come back later."

She wouldn't.

Kel took a deep breath before spinning on her heel and softly making an exit. As she reached the front door, she paused and took out a creased envelope from her pocket. She turned it over in her hands twice and then dropped it on the carpeted floor before finally slipping out the door and running to her car.

As she got in, she glanced out the car window one final time, taking in the image of the grand house. The largest in the neighbourhood. With good reason too. A family so large that one less would make no different. The girl - no, woman, for that was what she was now - furrowed her brow for a moment. She had played her part; whatever happened now wasn't her concern. It wasn't her fault her family had no time for her; she had always tried her best to live up to their expectations but it was no use.

Still, at least she'd been considerate enough to leave them a letter. Her mind flashed back to the unmarked envelope she'd left lying on the hallway floor. She hadn't addressed it on purpose. Whether they noticed it and recognised its importance before it was too late was up to them now. Whether they burned a bridge unaware... well, then there would be little she'd care to do amend that.

It just... She cursed herself. Why was she stalling? She slipped the key into ignition, shifted the gears and pulled away from the curb, desperately attempting to distract herself from the poignant grief threatening to cloud her mind. Quickly, she turned on some music and the sound of an orchestra spilled out, melodies rising and sinking and soothing. Driving down the road, gradually putting distance between herself and the place she had once called home, she began to add some order to her disarrayed thoughts.

She had always been more than aware that she was the 'accident'. There were other phrases she could think of, were she to put her mind to it: unplanned and unwanted, the black sheep, oddball, wallflower, and more. It just hurt to hear it being confirmed by the people she loved and called family. But really, she shouldn't have expected much from them in the first place. Growing up in such a large family had always had its downsides along with the pluses. More competition than could possibly be healthy, and uneven, unfair amounts of attention from the parents were the two biggest problems she could think of.

Well, it didn't matter so much anymore, so it wouldn't do to dwell on such depressing topics. She would be leaving soon, moving to the other end of the country. To her, it felt like the end of the world... Kel blinked as a car horn blared; she had stopped at a green light. Shaking herself again, she hastily put the vehicle back into motion. It really wouldn't do to keep on with that train of thought.

Not long afterwards, she reached the block where her apartment resided. Parking the car in the lot opposite, she crossed the road and walked inside the building, basking in the familiarity of her surroundings. Within a few days, this would no longer be her home. Within a few days, she would be moving out, never to see the face of her doorman again, or be aggravated by her neighbour who lived directly above her, the one who suffered from OCD and insisted slamming his door 26 times every morning. Never again would she walk out of the elevator to her apartment, knowing that her best friend was only two doors down, there for her when she needed him.

Speaking of her best friend... she needed to talk to him too. If he didn't find out directly from her that she was leaving, then he'd be devastated. Kel waved a listless hand at Gower the doorman, who was peering worriedly in her direction, then headed for the stairs. The elevator was malfunctioning today. Just another metaphor for certain aspects of her life. She sighed, before beginning the long climb up. First however, she'd have to finish packing. The removal men would be turning up bright and early on Sunday morning, giving her only two days left to strip the place bare.

Saturday evening found her sprawled lazily on the couch, watching an rerun of an old comedy on TV. A knock sounded at the door, before she heard a key being shoved into the lock. Loud footsteps approached the living room and within a few seconds, Neal appeared in front of her, pacing nervously. He looked frantic, his hair wild and clothes rumpled.

"Neal, are you ok?" she asked with concern, propping herself up on one elbow.

"No!" He exclaimed, waving his arms in the air. "You won't believe what just happened! I-"

And then he stopped. And he noticed the lack of decorations, the spartan room, and the crates of books neatly piled on top of each other in the corner. His eyes widened in disbelief, and he left the room. Kel heard him run to her bedroom, then the spare room, and then to the kitchen. When he returned, he pointed a shaky finger at her.

"You. Explain. Where are you going?" he all but pleaded of her.

Kel looked down at the floor, quietly staring his scuffed suede boots. She had bought him those a year ago, one of the many presents for his birthday. What other memories would she be leaving behind? After a moment, she sat up, creating space for him to sit.

"Neal, I wanted you to be the first to know." But it wasn't a good start, and it wasn't enough to placate him either. Still, she had to get it out and off her chest. Leaving him behind would be hard to do, but it ought to help to tackle the problem head on. "I've... I've been offered an apprenticeship. The opportunity's excellent; I'd be a fool to pass it up. But Neal... the firm, it's based in a city up north, too far for me to commute. I'm moving, Neal, to live there; permanently."

"Permanently?" he echoed with a distant air. "As in, the rest of your life?"

"If... if that's how it turns out, then yes, that is a possibility," she offered with a curious smile. "What? It's not like I'll be missed much around here."

"But... that's not true - you know that I'll miss you..." Neal suddenly whimpered, looking for all the world like a kicked puppy, his eyes soulful and wounded.

"It's not like we won't see each other ever again - you can always come up to visit, you know that, right?"

"Oh, but you won't come down to see us?" he retorted.

Kel shrugged uncomfortably. "Neal, there's not much to keep me here, other than you and Owen and Cleon... have I ever told you that before?"

His gaze sharpened but his words were gentle. "Your family, Kel, you're forgetting your family. They're here too."

"No..." she whispered, looking away. "They're not my family - not really."

Neal looked about to protest, but she quelled it with a pained smile and a quiet, ashamed plea. Not that he knew what he would say. For once, she had managed to render him speechless. There sat his best friend of all time, hurting, and he hadn't even noticed. Nor did he know why; what could have led her to think such things? He didn't know, but he'd sure as hell try his best to dispel such negativity while he still had time, for who knew when he'd next see her. She was leaving to a better place, but he could not follow her, not right away.

Eventually he found his voice again. "Wow... I come here to surprise you with my news, yet somehow you still manage to trump that."

"Sorry..." she mumbled, wincing ever so slightly. "What was your surprise?"

"Doesn't matter too much now, does it?" he shot back lightly. "You can hear it some other time. When are you moving out?"

"Tomorrow," Kel replied cautiously. "Why?"

"Tomorrow?! But that's, that's-" Neal broke off, speechless yet again. "You- I- just when were you going to let me know you were about to skip town?! No, wait, don't answer that; I'm not sure I want to know! Honestly girl, one of these days you're going to give me a heart attack."

She wore a guilty look on her face as she opened her mouth to apologise again, but Neal silenced her with a finger on her lip.

"Hush, you. You're not about to help your case any. Now, it seems you've managed to take care of the packing single handedly, so I can hardly offer much help there. But you have to come out with me tonight - for dinner, a dance, a drink, something! And I won't take no for an answer. Come, you can go as you are, you look fine. Get up; come on!"

Neal got up and left the room as he whipped out his phone and began dialling a number into it.

Kel rolled her eyes at his enthusiasm. However, it was rubbing off on her nonetheless. Feeling somewhat more cheery than ten minutes ago, she stood up and turned the TV off before joining Neal outside. She would go with him and have a good time, and when she left, she would leave knowing that he would always be there for her, only a phone call away. And suddenly, her heart felt lightened.

Much of the angst in this story was derived from what I read between the lines about the Mindelan relationships depicted in the books. The rest was added from my own experience; I come from a long line of large families from both my maternal and paternal sides. A lot of in-fighting, jealousy and isolation occurs. It's not pretty, but reality rarely is. I, myself, have five siblings, so I can testify to that.

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- Khadeejah, 27/02/2010