Scarred
Kairi didn't really wear anything that showed her back anymore.
Sora first noticed it happening at the beach. Before she'd worn two-piece swimsuits all the time, but now she just wore one-piece swimsuits instead. Still looked as good as ever, but he couldn't help but notice the change.
And any time they dressed up for a nice occasion or she wore something cute for one of their dates, her dresses covered her back completely. The way she dressed in general was a lot more reserved than it used to be. Muted colors and lots of whites and blacks and... pastels, was it called? Something like that. All he knew was that she didn't wear the bright colors she'd worn when they were younger.
Still, he didn't think about it all that much. Kairi looked great no matter what she wore. It didn't really come up again until the day they went shopping together for clothes to wear to Terra and Aqua's wedding.
"This one would look great on you," Sora said as he pulled a blue dress off the rack to show her. It was sleeveless with one of those skirts that was shorter in the front and longer in the back, and he really wanted to see her try it on.
She examined the dress carefully. "It is really cute, but the back's a little low cut for my taste," she said at last.
"Awwww, c'mon, you could pull it off easily." She could pull off anything, really, but this dress in particular would look great on her, Sora just knew it would.
"I don't think so. That kind of style just doesn't really suit me."
Sora frowned and returned the dress to the rack. "If you say so. I don't know, it almost feels like you don't want to wear anything that shows your back."
"And? I'm not a child anymore. I want to look the part."
"What's childish about this dress?" he said, giving it a quizzical look. If anything, the dress was classy. Sexy.
"Well, it's Aqua's big day. I don't want to wear anything that might take away from that."
"Look, this dress is hardly going to take away from Aqua's special moment. It's not even white. That's a rule, right? You're not supposed to wear white to a wedding."
She found his hand and gave it a quick squeeze. "You're learning."
Sora grinned at that, their earlier disagreement already fading away.
The wedding was awesome, Aqua looked beautiful, and Terra got really emotional which made Sora get emotional. These two had been through a lot to reach this point, and Sora was glad they were finally getting their happily ever after.
It was late when they got back to Destiny Islands. They said goodnight to Riku, and then Sora walked Kairi home as he often did.
But unlike most times, when he said goodnight with a quick kiss, Kairi didn't stop kissing him. She kept kissing him, in fact. For a long time. Maybe it was something about seeing Terra and Aqua tie the knot, but she was a lot bolder than she usually was.
When he finally broke away for air, her face was flushed and her lips were pink, and her chest heaved as she gazed up into his eyes.
"My parents – aren't home tonight," she said, her fingers fiddling with his tie as they both tried to catch their breath.
Um. Um. Did she mean what he thought she meant?
Yes, yes she did. A few minutes later, and they were in her room and on her bed, right where they had left off. His jacket soon ended up on the ground, followed by his vest, and then his shirt. She paused to kiss the scar resting over his heart, the scar from where he'd stabbed himself with the Keyblade of Heart to save her. The scar that was a sign of how much she meant to him, of the lengths he would go to save her.
"Thank you," she said softly, and he knew she wasn't just thanking him for this scar but for the other, deeper scar that left no visible mark but had taken his life. Stolen him away from her and their friends until he'd fought his way back to her side.
"Anything for you, Kairi."
He kissed her again, hoping to show her what words alone couldn't really say. Her soft hands ran up and down his back, and he found the zipper on her dress and started to unzip it. She stiffened, and he stopped what he was doing and leaned back to look at her.
"What's wrong?" he asked, bringing his hand to her face and stroking her cheek. "If I'm going too fast, we can slow down, or stop—"
Her eyes flickered downwards. "Sora, before we continue… there's something I should show you," she said at last. "You deserve to know. I don't want it to come as a surprise."
She turned away from him and lifted her hair out of the way. "Go ahead," she said softly.
His hands found their way to her zipper again, and he continued where he had left off. As the dress revealed more and more of her body, a lump built in his throat.
Running down almost her entire back was a painful looking scar. It started a few inches below the nape of her neck and went all the way to the small of her back, and he knew exactly what it was from.
The blow that had killed her. The blow that had torn her heart apart as well as his. The reason he'd had to die in the first place. A mocking reminder of all the pain of her death and his, of how she'd been torn from him and then he'd been cut off from her.
The more he stared at it, the more it just seemed like one giant blur. It was carved into her skin, one final screw you from Xehanort, one last act of cruelty to haunt them from beyond the grave.
"It looks awful, I know," came her voice. "It's why I never wear anything that shows my back anymore. I don't want… I don't want people to see me as a victim."
Sora's heart broke a little further at that, and the pieces of it welled up and spilled out of his eyes and got choked up in his throat.
She turned her head to glance back at him. "Sora?"
"I'm sorry," he said as he wiped his eyes, and he meant it with all his heart.
She zipped the dress back up and turned around to face him again. "Don't be," she said, her hair brushing against her cheeks as she shook her head. "It's not your fault. I just wish it wasn't there. It's not beautiful like your scar. All it is is a sign of how weak I was. I saved you the first time, but I was too powerless to keep myself from dying."
It was his turn to shake his head. "You're wrong about that. You're a survivor, Kairi, not a victim. Dead people don't form scars. Only the living can. This scar… the reason you have it may hurt us both, but it's also a reminder that you're alive. Xehanort didn't win. Death didn't even win. In the end, something a lot stronger did."
"When you put it that way, I can't help but think… maybe it's not so bad."
"No, it is bad. But it doesn't have to stay that way. We can make it good."
He moved behind her and unzipped her dress one last time. As it slid down her body and gathered around her hips, the lump in his throat just got bigger and bigger. All the memories from that day were coming back in an awful rush, and he had to do something about it.
So he did. He leaned forward and kissed the scar like she'd kissed his scar all those years ago. The skin of it was raised and bumpy, like the scar over his chest, not at all smooth like the rest of her skin was. His tears slid down his cheeks and smeared onto her back as he kissed his way down, his fingers joining in to caress the scar as he committed every inch of it to memory. Because if she was going to live the rest of her life scarred like this, scarred because of his failure, then he was going to kiss that scar every day they were together from here on out.
His tears washed over it, and he willed them to wash the pain away. Both his and hers. He couldn't be there for her as she'd died. Not the way she'd been there for him, anyway. He couldn't change the past, either. Several years later, and his own grief was the only comfort he could offer. But maybe it would be enough. Maybe he would be enough.
When he was done, he just wrapped his arms around her and held her. The scar on his chest touched part of her scar, and with each beat of his heart he willed life and healing from his wounded heart into her body and soul.
"See?" he said, his voice shaking as he caressed her skin. "We can make it good."
She tilted her head so she could kiss his cheek. "Yes. Even this."
"Especially this."
A soft smiled danced across her lips at that. "Thank you, Sora."
"Anything for you, Kairi."
And he meant it. He really, truly meant it. They might both be scarred now, but they weren't alone. And that was what made all the difference.
Together, they'd find healing. Together, they'd find hope. And together, they would make even the bad things good. The scars would remain, but so would the reminders of their hard-earned victories. Of everything they'd been through so they could be together now.
And because of that, holding her in his arms was that much better than it would have been otherwise. That much better because of what it had cost him. That much better because of what he had sacrificed.
And knowing she felt the same way? Knowing she could see past the scars and the heartbreak and find a way to make things good again?
It was worth it. It was worth every tear and heartbreak, if it meant they could finally be together.
And it was absolutely worth every scar.
A/N: kingdommad300 over on tumblr first suggested this idea to me a few weeks ago and wrote a fic of it themselves called Reminders. Then gotmilk5101520 (over on tumblr as well) brought it up in a headcanon post, and I knew I had to write the thing. Especially since MzellLazuli and Alja were both like… please write some fluff now. But joke's on them, even my fluff is angsty nowadays! The lasting legacy of KH3, everyone.
Anyway, this is a followup of sorts to my fic called Scar that I wrote… almost a year ago now. My how time flies. Give that one a read too if you enjoyed this one.
As always, thank you for reading!