Ontology
"Is something wrong, Raito-kun?"
L. Lawliet had been watching his almost-captive out of the corner of his eye for the last twenty minutes, taking in the blue shadows cast across the pale features and the slowly blinking eyes. Light Yagami was no longer in the room with him, that much was quite clear, the way his inner lip had been pulled in by anxious nibbling and the stillness of his vacant gaze gave away much more than he was sure the other boy would have liked.
"Raito-kun?"
Finally, having had enough of the strange, silent, unproductive boy he tapped the shirt clad shoulder. Raito lurched forward, looking guilty, as if he'd been caught in the middle of some illicit act. Up by 2.
"Ryuuzaki-san… Was there something you wanted…?" The tiredness and hint of sadness however was not what he was expecting.
"Is something wrong, Raito-kun." It sounded strange repeating a name so often.
Raito slumped back into his chair and resuming his place staring at the wall, brow furrowed now. The chain clinked with the momentum of him sitting back down.
"Are you… afraid Ryuuzaki-san?"
Nor had this question been expected. L tipped his head to one side and withdrew his thumb from his face, "Sometimes I fear things."
"Are you afraid of… Kira…?"
"Sometimes I fear Kira."
Light looked at him, wide eyed then, the golden hue of his irises seeming to shimmer with some unrecognisable emotion that sent shivers down his spine, "I'm terrified of Him."
The unspoken capitalisation of 'Him' reminded L of the mannerisms of Kira, he who wished to be God…
"We could be killed any day now…"
But there was something else on the young man's mind, "I don't… want to… die…"
"I think it is perfectly rational for a man to not want to die."
There was still more.
But Raito-kun, Light Yagami, was not saying it yet.
"What is it, Raito?"
The use of his name without any honorific must have triggered something in his charge because the next minute he was standing, shifting from foot to foot and blushing. Whatever could be going on in the mind of this strange, golden boy-genius? He wasn't sure and he didn't really know if he was ready to know. The guilt was back in the gold eyes and heavy with concentrated unhappiness.
"It's not so much that I don't want to die at all… that's mortality right? It's just… I don't want to die a virgin."
L had to focus very hard not to let his mouth drop open or his eyes widen in shock, "Raito-kun is a virgin?"