Quatro Dysfunctional
Aite, I'll be real. This is just a fancy recap thing for all of the other members of my group. But since I have a tendency to "disappear" in the middle of sessions due to quiet mental breakdowns thanks to prolonged periods of socialising, I will only be able to write from my perspective. I'm fairly sure this world was written on a mad high so I'll leave out the more crazy bits until the DM has had enough time to change their mind or it's set in stone.
World
The island of Dunmaster. Rich in history, two major shifts of note have changed its identity. The first, a series of devastating quakes or a similar catastrophic event of which records have been eroded by time reduced the size of the island by a quarter. Its western face was turned to a archipelago of uninhabitable islands, the seas surrounding rage and swallow the souls of those who dare trespass their dance.
The second, the successful[?] migration of offlanders to the island. The religious demographic was irrevocably changed. As the tensions between the islanders and the offlanders reached its height, a second poorly understood catastrophe took place. The old gods of the island… they disappeared. In their place, the dominion of the seven by the offlanders was secured. There is little room to doubt that the seven gods banished the old ones for their evil nature.
By now, three quarters of island is called the new world. Regions demographically made up of the inhabitants and influenced heavily by the culture and religion of the offlanders. The last quarter is known as the frontier, it includes the uninhabitable archipelago. The old world is viewed as savage and cruel, whilst the new world civilised. But for all the old worlds harshness, as least it's not corrupt and useless as those invalids in the Lizardhome police force!
The new worlds great political powers are, the Andines, originally a half-orc colony and praised for being uniquely "democratic" (Quote from DM's notes, pls don't fire me Sam). Buhao and Hao share similar a similar past to the original islanders of the area, the Tabaxi. However, unlike the in the western frontier, these are the descendants of converts to the new gods. The border between Buhao and Hao is very symbolic of a past of heated argument and basically a dick waving contest between the king and his right-hand man which led to a split. I suppose it was just tedious to sow their countries back together so they didn't bother. And then there's Lizardhome. I, the writer, having played so far in this campaign, have little fondness for these incompetents so we'll live it at that.
Finally, there's the west. The old world. Here and there are communities of varying sizes formed around the worship of their inactive old gods. Far from their glory days, they are understandably persecuted. I can't say that's wrong, they are a bit jaded and dangerous. I would be jaded and dangerous to if somebody came and destroyed centuries of culture and religion building, defacing and tearing down holy pilgrimage sites for veiny chunches to be erected in their place. But y'know, it's okay. Who's ever heard of somebody punching back in a fist fight?
Now, the party. For the moment, named Quatro dysfunctional.
Behel'satheth. A being composed entirely of nervous energies. Once a dapper overworked office worker for a stocking and identifying firm run by the worst-kind-of-capitalism Dragon, now just dapper and overworked. I was told show don't tell so I'll descritptions short. The player is quite a horny bloke so what a coincidence.
Bovril McVitie. Friendly yet timid halfling offlander. This adventurer is not as hardy as steel, more like a type of custard. The player is a wholesome friend of mine. I use the word 'wholesome' liberally as most people tend to be wholesome compared to me.
Tabaxi. No. Player is also no.
Cai. A bad-tempered time bomb. Is unsociable, but mostly because I, the player, lack social skills of any kind.
The intro blurb thingy?
Four adventurers gather around Landsmouth. Two shipwrecked, a humble professor halflling and a nervous wreck of a tiefling, carrying with them an amnesia which will persist until they actually sort their backstories out (about 6 sessions in and still nah). Meanwhile, a Tabaxi is on the hunt for her next bounty, whilst a naïve and hopeful inquisitor from the west journeys east in order to root out new insidious threats.
They are Bovril, Behel'satheth, a Tabaxi, and Cai. As they meet, sinister forces begin to stir in the shadows. In the far west there are talks of the old god cult remnants uniting to form a pantheon and the rise of a new unheard of god, whilst in the east whispers of corruption poison the good name of the new world.
In time, and enough nudging from the DM, the party may form the most very below average adventurer party the world has ever seen! Lofty goals, the bar should be set lower for Quatro dysfunctional!