A/N: Takes place after the first season finale "The End of the Beginning" from the TV series "The Tick" (2017).

Knife to Know You

Destiny has your number. It has your address too, just in case you don't answer the phone. And if you don't bother to open your mail, it will come to your house, pick you up by the scruff of the neck and shake you to get your attention. Throw away that dance card, because you're booked for the night. The only question is: What is the band going to play and who's doing the trumpet solo?

"Arthur, how do I know what evil is?"

The Tick sat on Arthur's couch, his weight causing it to sag greatly in the middle. After Tinfoil Kevin's tidying efforts, the apartment was almost presentable. There were still scorch marks on the wall that needed to be painted over, and the hole in the outer wall had been covered in plastic. It didn't look pretty, but it kept the birds out.

But the Tick noticed none of these things; or if he did, he immediately forgot it and might notice it again later. His attention was on the television, where a reporter was doing a story on The Terror, including updates about his current trial.

Arthur Everest gulped a drink of water. "I don't know, Tick. The Terror was evil; I think we can agree on that. Ms. Lint was evil but she worked for him. The Pyramid Gang was evil, but they worked for her."

"So anyone who is evil works for the Terror either directly or indirectly. It seems so simple when you say it, chum."

"No no no no, Tick. The logic doesn't work in reverse."

"I'll take your word for it, logic isn't my strong suit. I think strength is my strong suit. Invulnerability doesn't hurt. Well, maybe it stings once in a while but it's a small price to pay for not dying. What was I talking about?"

"Evil."

"Oh, yeah. So how can you tell evil?"

"Sometimes you can't. You can see evil acts, but sometimes the same acts can be for good. And that's not counting the stuff you can't see."

"I know what you mean. I thought Overkill was evil when I first saw him kill, but then when I found out he was actually fighting evil I thought that maybe it was just his way of dealing with evil I didn't like. I prefer just to stop people, like when your dad Walter was thrashing those bad guys at the statue dedication."

"He's not my dad, he's my step...what do you mean thrashing?" Arthur asked, suddenly curious. He lost his train of thought though when they were interrupted.

"You can tell evil by the smell, my blue friend" a deep rough voice called from the door.

"I thought so. Arthur, these socks are evil" Tick proclaimed as he threw the offending pair of footwear that had been lying on the couch in to the trash.

"Don't do that Tick, these don't have any holes in them" Arthur sighed, stooping down to retrieve the clothing from the can.

"If there aren't any holes how do you put your feet in them? Tick asked. "Greetings Midnight; welcome to our headquarters."

"Don't you knock?" Arthur asked.

"With what? I didn't want to mess up your door by scratching on it" the black German Shepard replied. He nosed the door shut and then examined its battered appearance. "Probably wouldn't have made a difference."

"Come on in, fellow thwarter of all that is wrong" Tick welcomed, offering the couch with a sweep of his hand. "Mi headquarters es su headquarters. Even if it does contain Arthur's socks."

"Thanks, I've been on the run." The dog hopped up on the couch and lay down. His coat was somewhat matted and it looked like several stars had been knocked off his collar. His trademark red, white and blue sunglasses were missing.

"I know, those gym workouts can be tiring from what I've seen" the Tick observed. "Fortunately I don't require it. Or if I do, it's so infrequent that I can't remember the last time I did it. So, you can actually smell evil?"

"I can; dogs have super-sensitive noses. Evil smells; it's a putrid, rotten stench that offends the nose and the soul. It's why I'm here, and it's not from the gym."

"Arthur, you don't have any of Mr. Goat's rejected menu items lying around, do you?" Tick asked, trying to peer into the kitchen area to look for a source for stench.

Before Arthur could even decide how he was going to object, Midnight clarified and went on. "Not here. No, I smelled it yesterday. A smell from my younger days."

"Back when you were Onward" Arthur said, referring to Midnight's previous name as a sidekick to the Flag Five's superhero member Christian Soldier.

"No; before that back when I was just 'Here Boy' in Dr. Freakmaker's lab. There were other dogs there too, and one of them had this...smell...about him. I didn't know what it was at the time because I thought it just rubbed off on him from Freakmaker but I've come to associate that smell with evil, no matter what form it takes; it's what they all have in common."

"Can I learn that nose trick?" Tick asked, eager to try.

"No."

"Pity. Guess I'll just have to let my eyes smell for me."

Ignoring Tick, Arthur prodded Midnight further. "Did the other dog get rescued with you?"

"I didn't know what happened to Beau until later. He kind of disappeared for a while."

"You mean you never heard from him."

"No, I mean he disappeared. We all were changed somehow by Freakmaker; I can start fires with my mind. Beau...could become invisible. He changed names and became InvisiBeau."

"Oh, I see" Tick followed along. "That would be handy too - can you teach me that invisible trick?"

"I can't do it, so I doubt it. But Beau could, and I know for a fact that he's used it for no good." Midnight looked at the table. "Is that today's newspaper?"

"Yeah," Arthur answered "I haven't had time to look at it yet."

"Check out the front page."

Arthur unfolded the newspaper and looked at the front page. There, in bold type across the front page it read:

DOG STABS INDICTED MODEL

Yesterday, while walking from a restaurant to her apartment, April August was attacked by an unknown assailant. Miss August, the former consort of missing mobster and frozen yogurt king Mike "Scoops" Scupperfield had been released on bail and was awaiting trial regarding the latest embezzlement scheme that brought down two city councilmen. At 7pm, she was rushed from behind and stabbed in the back, when she fell to the ground and was struck unconscious. She is listed in guarded condition at General Hospital and the extent of her injuries is unknown at this time. As this story went to print, the police have the weapon and are on the lookout for a person of interest describing as being "extremely short, hairy and very darkly complected." More on this story as it develops.

"Do you know anyone who fits the description?" Tick asked Midnight. "I'll help you look for the fiend."

Midnight stared at Tick and then looked over at Arthur for help. Arthur just shrugged as if to say "I didn't make him like that."

"I can think of someone" Midnight said wryly, if dogs are capable of being wry. "I was there when it happened."

"Great!" Tick shouted "What did he look like?"

"He was invisible."

"Got it. We're looking for someone who's invisible. Wait. Something isn't right. Can you go over that again? I don't follow you."

"Wait Tick, I think I understand" Arthur stated slowly and deliberately. "Let me see if I have it right: You were there when Miss August was stabbed. You couldn't see who did it, but you could smell them? But since the attacker was invisible, people only saw you. I am assuming you chased after the attacker and people thought you were running away."

"Bravo Arthur, I've give you points for thinking. I trailed Beau as far as a hotel, but it was filled with used car salesmen and I couldn't distinguish his scent any longer. When I tried to go back to the scene of the crime the place was crawling with trigger-happy cops so I left. I wandered around during the night and finally thought of this place."

"Since you're here, could you sign my copy of 'Good Intentions'? We got sidetracked at the book signing. Wait, it's happening again; something isn't right. How did Beau-gone hold the knife?" Tick asked, perplexed. His antennae twitched to emphasize his confusion.

"Arthur, get me a knife; it's easier just to show you." Arthur grabbed a steak knife off his counter and set it on the couch beside Midnight. The dog picked up the knife's handle in his mouth and expertly tossed it across the room with a flick of his head. It stuck in the wall and wobbled slightly.

"Can you do it with a spoon?" Tick wondered out loud.

"But Midnight, there would be - well - slobber DNA on the handle of the knife. You'd be cleared as a suspect" Arthur coached.

"That's right, I didn't think of that...good work Arthur. A.E.G.I.S. is really going to be interested in you" Midnight smiled "after we take down Invisibeau."

"That's my buddy" Tick exclaimed proudly. "You'll be the smartest guy in the American Exchange Gathering Intelligent Superheroes."

"I thought it was the Allied Enterprises Generally Insuring Safety" Arthur quizzically added.

"Are you sure it isn't Against Evil Garnered In Solidarity?" asked Midnight.

"Funny, we didn't call it any of those things" Overkill stated as he stepped from a darkened corner, definitely not laughing. "But then again, my opinion is probably a little biased."

"Overkill!" Tick shouted. "Glad to see you. Did you bring your friendly boat?"

The End

A/N: I bought a game that consisted of a large deck of cards, each with a word and a point value on it. The object was to draw 5 cards and arrange as many of them as you could to create a fake newspaper headline to earn points. That seemed too easy, so I thought I would draw a few cards from the deck on my own and create a story based on the headline. I ended up with 'Dog Stabs Indicted Model' which could only fit in a few fandoms, so when I thought of talking dogs I came up with this one. It's a one-shot, so no future stories based on the premise are implied. This is what happens when too much time takes place between seasons.

And maybe I missed it, but I don't recall the show saying WHAT the acronym A.E.G.I.S. meant.