Title: "Sing To Me, Sebby"
Pairing: MorMor
Rating: M (because of drug use/self harm and language!)
Summary: After a long night of work, Sebastian winds down in an unexpected way with Jim… (ANGSTY FLUFF ALERT)
One breath followed another and Sebastian Moran quietly lit another cigarette. For just a moment, a glow illuminated the starry night as he flicked at his lighter. With each drag from the slim cylinder, Sebastian felt his muscles relax just a little more. He could still smell the coppery tang of blood on his jacket and frowned, thinking of the consequences of ruining yet another one of Jim's favorite suits.
There was no sign of Jim yet, which was strange. Usually, his boss would have texted after an hour or so, just to get confirmation on Sebastian's successful kill. Then, he would proceed to sweet talk or occasionally piss off the sniper into coming over and fucking him into the mattress. It was the little things about the job that Sebastian liked best…
Letting the cigarette fall against the cold concrete, Sebastian checked his phone once again, gritting his teeth in annoyance at the lack of texts or phone calls.
"This is bullshit…" He muttered, shouldering his rifle case and heading towards his car.
The drive took less time than expected as Sebastian pulled in front of the dingy apartment the consulting criminal was staying in temporarily. The sniper rolled his eyes as he stepped out of his car, regarding the surrounding apartments with distaste. Honestly, the man had all the money in the world and he chose to stay in the vilest places.
Sebastian had once asked about his strange habit and Jim replied with a grinning. "In order to fool the rats, you have to blend in first…"
What utter bullshit.
Approaching the door with caution, Sebastian reached out a hand, knocking gently. There was silence for a moment, then a sigh echoed from beyond the door and Sebastian relaxed, relieved to hear Jim was at least in his room and not wandering the streets without protection.
"Go away, Sebastian."
Sebastian froze, his eyes widening slightly. That voice… That voice didn't sound like it belonged to Jim. It was similar… but it was too tiny… too insecure. Testing the door, Sebastian found it was unlocked and quickly stepped inside, flicking on the light. His breath choked in his throat at the sight before him.
Jim was slumped against the farthest wall, his computer monitor still alight with a blog page. His wonderful Westwood suit was wrinkled from his strange position, the buttons of the jacket seemingly ripped off, exposing his white shirt splashed with crimson. Judging from the pattern, it wasn't Jim's…Thank god. Still, the consulting criminal's usually slicked back hair was messy and his eyes had dark purple circles drooping under them like he hadn't slept in days. (Knowing Jim's way of life, that wasn't such an uncommon occurrence.) Even as Sebastian approached and knelt in front of him, Jim's eyes were focused on something far off in the distance; his cocky smirk vanished from his pale face in lieu of a slight frown. His breathing was long and slow, yet somehow labored and Sebastian placed his hands on the smaller man's shoulders, sitting him upright and peering into his eyes worriedly.
"Moriarty…. Moriarty?" he tried. Still, no answer.
"…Jim?" he tried again and a spark of recognition lit up the other's eyes for just a moment. "Jim. What did you take?" Sebastian kept his voice firm, surprised that it wasn't shaking. He reached over, grasping Jim's chin and turning his face forward.
Jim felt cold and Sebastian swallowed nervously.
"BOSS, ANSWER ME." He was yelling now, hands gripping the expensive suit tightly. "ANSWER ME OR I SWEAR I'LL BEAT YOU INTO NEXT WEEK."
Jim's eyes remained unfocused but he chuckled, the corners of his mouth curling into a soft grin.
"Colorful pills… So many. I was so bored without you, Seb."
"Damn it!" Sebastian pulled the other man against him, hauling Jim to his feet as he practically dragged him towards the bathroom.
Forcing him to kneel in front of the toilet, Sebastian laced his fingers in Jim's hair, forcing his head down.
"Spit them up, Jim. Come on, you've done this before."
In his grip, Jim managed to shake his head, laughing.
"Nope!" he said childishly, his voice echoing against the porcelain. "You have to maaake meee." He continued in a sing-song tone.
Sebastian growled, kneeling down and yanking the brunette's head back.
"Fine, you little shit." He muttered, promptly shoving two long fingers to the back of Jim's throat.
The consulting criminal gagged, eyes growing wide as he suddenly keeled forward, shoulders heaving as he vomited again and again against his will.
As he finished, Sebastian let go of the brunette's hair and Jim placed his hands on either side of the toilet bowl for support. Jim shuddered, coughed as Sebastian sat back and rubbed at his temples with calloused fingers. As the genius finished heaving, his slim frame shuddering, the blonde grabbed at the other's shoulder, pulling him back to see what the damage was. Floating amid Jim's dinner were the culprits. Sebastian squinted, trying to identify the pills. With a huff, he recognized them.
Skittles. Jim had eaten fucking skittles; the colorful corpses of the sweets harmlessly floating in half digested burgers.
"Well..." Jim grinned. "That wasn't what I expected to be gagging on tonight…"
There was the Moriarty that Sebastian knew all too well. The brunette turned his head, flashing that same old cocky smirk at his favorite sniper, wiggling his eyebrows comically.
Sebastian didn't even blink, his scarred face contorted in a vicious scowl. He stood, walking out of the room without another word as brown eyes followed his body's movements.
Sebastian grabbed his rifle case from near the door where he dropped it in his blind panic, lugging it over to the single bed. He took out the custom firearm and dug deep inside the bag for his favorite grease-stained rag. Carefully disassembling the gun, Sebastian began to clean slowly as the sound of running water came from the restroom. From the corner of his eye, the blonde could see Jim's jacket and slacks fly from the bathroom falling in a heap by the door. He sighed, not bothering to look up when Jim wandered out of the bathroom several minutes later, the bloodstained shirt remaining as the only piece of clothing still on his body. Without needing to look at his boss, Sebastian knew that Cheshire smirk was back in full force. He kept his eyes trained on the multiple parts of his gun as the bed sagged next to him, Jim crawling towards Sebastian and kissing the sniper's cheek.
He had brushed his teeth… How thoughtful.
The brunette wrapped his arms around Sebastian's shoulders, hiding his face against the other's neck and nipping softly at the skin.
"I always loved it when you cleaned your weapons around me… Reminds me how dangerous you are, my tiger." he giggled, fingers tracing swirls against Sebastian's clothed shoulders.
The sniper froze, placing the rifle to the side before twisting in his boss' arms and practically throwing Jim back on the mattress, the criminal bouncing slightly from the force. Dark eyes sparkled with surprise and amusement and Jim threw up his arms, laughing.
"Ooh, Mister Moran, ooh! Are you going to ravish me now?"
Staying silent, the blonde hovered over the small man, light eyes searching his pale face. Jim blinked, raising one perfectly groomed eyebrow in confusion.
"… What? You're being particularly boring…"
A sharp smack interrupted the calm as Sebastian slapped Jim, the brunette's eyes narrowing into a glare as his head fell to the side. He stayed there, eyes towards the wall and breathing slightly uneven as Sebastian let his head hang, hands on either side of the genius.
Sebastian sat up, running a hand across his brow and shutting his eyes tightly, still straddling the smaller man.
"You don't… You shouldn't do things like that, boss… Just because you're bored… It's not…" Sebastian seemed to struggle with the words, moving back to his position on the edge of the bed.
For a minute or two, Sebastian stayed at the edge, trying to gather his thoughts while Jim remained, seemingly too in shock to move quite yet. After a bit, the weight behind Sebastian shifted as Jim moved to curl against his back.
Sebastian could hear shallow breathing from the genius behind him and closed his eyes, the sound almost like a lullaby. They sat in silence for what seemed like hours, neither quite knowing what could be said. Sebastian cleared his throat and Jim almost jumped, hands grabbing at the back of Sebastian's suit jacket. The sniper was still fuming, although the flames were slowly dying. He sighed, letting his head hang as Jim moved again, wrapping thin arms around the sniper's middle, face hidden between his shoulder blades. His breath was warm and Sebastian couldn't repress the shiver that ran down his back. It was times like this that Sebastian liked best: after the jobs had been completed and the world had long since gone to bed.
"I need you." Sebastian froze, eyes opening to stare at the wall in front of him.
The silence hung, seeming to stretch for hours despite the slow tick of the hotel room clock proving otherwise. Sebastian felt his heartbeat spike only for a moment and he almost wondered if Jim could hear it. The genius tightened his grip on the front of his sniper's shirt and Sebastian couldn't help but sigh.
"What do you want me to say, boss?" Sebastian asked, knowing perfectly well what he wanted to say.
Truth be told, Sebastian wanted to turn around, pull Jim into his arms and just hold him. He wanted to kiss that smug bastard until his lips were chapped and they had to share breath, until their heartbeats could sync and Jim knew once and for all that he wasn't alone and wouldn't be alone until the end of his life. But Sebastian knew better than to break protocol. Jim could never admit his feelings for Sebastian, not to himself and certainly not out loud. Both men knew this.
"I need you to lie to me. Tell me you love me. Let's pretend to be one of those couples that care about each other for once." Jim drawled, his voice somewhat muffled as he nuzzled Sebastian's back.
Sebastian let his eyes drift to the floor.
"…Jim." He couldn't finish. You know it wouldn't be a lie.
"Please, Sebastian." The sadness in Jim's voice was almost pathetic.
The blonde closed his eyes, sighing again and he felt Jim tense in the silence, waiting.
Placing his hands gently over Jim's hands across his stomach, Sebastian whispered. "I love you, alright?"
From the silence that followed, Sebastian wondered if Jim even heard him; not that he had expected any sort of reciprocated response. He started to open his mouth to say it again, hopefully a little louder when he stopped, an unusual sensation teasing his back.
Tears; Sebastian felt the warm wetness of tears against his back, seeping through the clothes. He finally gained the strength to turn, Jim unmoving as his sniper faced him. He looked rumpled, his eyes large and full of tears. If it wasn't for the blood stained shirt, he would have looked outright childish.
"Boss…. Jim… It's okay." Sebastian muttered, cradling Jim's face within his hands. "What's wrong?"
Jim looked up at Sebastian, throwing him a sheepish, halfhearted grin. It nearly broke Sebastian's heart to see Jim like this.
"I'm just…so tired, Seb."
The smaller man looked like he was close to collapsing, wavering despite his solid foundation on the bed. Sebastian nodded slowly, moving to hold Jim against him. The genius didn't resist, falling against the taller man's chest as he moved both of them further up the bed. As the sheets were pulled away, Jim barely moved in order to slip himself beneath them. Sebastian moved silently and quickly, careful not to jostle Jim too much. Moving off the side of the bed, Sebastian carefully pulled the sheets over his boss, Jim seeming so small and still alone in the bed. For a moment, it looked as though the brunette had fallen asleep, his eyes finally closed in a serene mask. Yet, as Sebastian turned to leave, a small voice stopped him.
"Seb…?"
"Yea boss?" he replied softly.
"Stay with me…"
Sebastian couldn't help but smile softly, taking his place back on the bed. Deciding not to bother with the sheets, Sebastian moved over until he was lying beside Jim, laying his head on his arms so Jim could have both pillows.
"Anything for you, boss."
It wasn't until Jim had finally fallen deep asleep, his breathing finally normalized that Sebastian dared to place a gentle kiss on his forehead. In his sleep, the genius shifted towards the touch, a soft sigh breaking the silence. Sebastian then started to move away, taking a step towards his gun case. He was stopped by the small voice again and he turned, ready to apologize for waking Jim but the genius was still very much asleep, mumbling something as he twitched his head from side to side.
"S-seb … love you…" his words were slurred, almost incoherent but Sebastian got the message loud and clear.
It was times like this that Sebastian liked best...
AN: Oh goooods… I know it's not my best work.. I might go back later and change a few things about the ending but… here you go! Feel free to leave critiques!