All Characters belong to paramount and lyrics included belong to Adele.
Hello, it's me
I was wondering if after all these years you'd like to meet
Kathryn wandered the park huddled in her coat. She had been completely useless at work today and she had decided to just take the rest of the day off. She stepped on a twig and was pulled from her mindless walk.
What was she doing? Good lord it was only a regular day. 'A very important day... 6 month anniversary..' said a voice in the back of her mind.
She shook her head and attempted to keep walking, but when she did her chest clenched and she let out a muffled yell of pain.
She stayed exactly where she was and willed the pain to pass by taking short shallow breaths, not wanting to aggravate it again. The cold air wasn't helping and the pain stayed for longer than usual, but eventually she straightened up and kept walking.
Her anxiety pains as she called them, had been getting worse for about a month, her temper was short and she found herself avoiding social functions at all costs.
She huffed and sat down on a frost covered bench. 'This has to stop..' she thought 'I have to know, then I can get on with my life.' She angrily rose to her feet once more and hurried back to headquarters.
Once in her office she shed her jacket and walked to the Comm. She opened her mouth to make the call but hesitated, maybe he didn't want to see her. He certainly hadn't made any effort to, but maybe he would appreciate hearing from her. She had after all, parted ways with him rather angrily. She decided to just leave a voicemail.
"Hello Chakotay, it's me, Kathryn. I was wondering if you would like to get lunch sometime soon, just to talk. I want to know how you are doing. Please let me know what you think."
She ended the call abruptly. It was now in his hands.
To go over everything
They say that time's supposed to heal ya, but I ain't done much healing
She put her head in her hands and was shocked and appalled to find a tear making its way down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away and stood, she got some much needed coffee and returned to her desk. Maybe work would take her mind of her feelings. She alerted her assistant to clock her back in and started to go over reports.
Hello, can you hear me?
I'm in California dreaming about who we used to be
She lay on her bed staring at the ceiling, without work she had nothing to distract her and her mind wandered. She found herself thinking about New Earth, how close they had been, how free she had felt. What she wouldn't give to feel like that again, to have someone there, just to help her. But she was alone.
Her crew had moved on and she was left to deal with the emotional aftermath by herself. Chakotay was gone, probably happy with Seven somewhere, maybe settled down with a house.. maybe a family…
Stop, it hadn't been that long. Only a few months really. But still… she just wanted him to be happy, and apparently that meant that she had to be unhappy.
When we were younger and free
I've forgotten how it felt before the world fell at our feet
What had it been like without him? How had she gotten by? Certainly she had always had someone, but right now she couldn't remember what she had done without him by her side, always there to talk, to bring her to her right mind again, to save her from herself.
She knew she needed to ask for help, her depression was worsening, her anxiety attacks were becoming more frequent, and her constant headache had reappeared.
Maybe she didn't deserve help.
She shut her eyes and drifted into fitful sleep.