Author's Note: I'm back and running at this as quickly as the Muse will allow. Finally beginning to center myself after the death of my Grandmother and have started with editing the hell out of this story. There were several components which I wasn't fond of and decided to change. Most of the changes are small, but they seemed to make it flow better; at least it seemed so to me. You'll have to let me know what you all think.
I've already started the next chapter and it's halfway there, in pencil anyway :) I'll try and have it up in a timely fashion.
To all the follows and reviews: Thank you so much. Even though I stepped away for a while every time I receive a message or an email it brings and has brought a smile to my face on days which I most certainly needed it. You have my gratitude for being bright lights in a dark time.
The rhythmic staccato of nails on wood brought no ease to her mind. There was no telling how long she had been sitting in her study staring at the fire letting her hand drum its rhythm on her desk. With a sigh she rose and walked towards the balcony. The stretch and give of leather on her legs once familiar, felt foreign, but good. Long gone were the power suits that had identified her for so many years; in their place black leather and a stunningly intricate silver riding jacket. As soon as they all had returned everything had seemed as if they had never left. As the magic flowed through her veins once more she felt years lift from her body that she hadn't realized the other reality had made her feel. The hair she had so once loved, long and flowing was immediately relegated back to the short style she preferred in Storybrooke. Some of the changes she had made with herself over the last 3 decades she preferred.
Standing on the balcony she took a deep breath letting her gaze wander the courtyards. Soldiers milled about, some walking from one place in the darkened courtyards to another, others merely passing time by looking like they were standing guard. The soldiers had also faced a change upon their return. Their numbers had increased exponentially, as she had to prepare herself for the inevitability that sooner rather than later the surrounding kingdoms would be converging. Their uniforms glistened and flashed with the whipping of torches; she was rather fond of the new ones. Long gone was the armor she required of her army prior to the curse. Unlike the other soldiers in the realm hers did not wear the cumbersome armor that story books painted soldiers as wearing. Her men and women were dressed in leather and mythril, all enchanted for the utmost speed and protection. None were allowed to wear helmets while within the castle walls, unless they were on alert, as she wanted to see every single one of their faces. One could tell so much of a person by their facial expressions and how they controlled them. Women were the newest addition to her ranks. They may not have the brute strength of their male counterparts, but they made up for it in stealth, speed, and wits. Women were always smarter she thought with a small smirk crossing her red lips. There had been a few incidents of the men thinking that they could take advantage of the fact that women were more freely on the grounds, but the women she had brought on were not wilting violets and quickly put those who overstepped their bounds firmly back in their place. And then she personally put them even more firmly in their place once again. Everyone knew not to cross her, even if she had become more lenient and generous since their return.
Turning back into her study once more she looked to the fire and quickly conjured a small ball of the heat into her hand. Watching it dance along her hand the licking flames reflected in her dark eyes. When she saw the approaching cloud covering Storybrooke she welcomed the return of what was coming; the power, the fear, the vengeance. Now with this elemental force caressing her fingers she just felt tired. Her son… Her beloved Henry was no longer with her, because of her he had almost died. No. He had died. The one person she had sworn to protect and never harm had been hurt the most. When that thought had reached her power addled brain while she had paced her war room everything had stopped. There was no way to make him love her again. There was no way to see him; to try and even explain to him why all of this had happened. She was positive that the wards on Snow and James' castle had been fortified ten-fold upon their return. There were no mirrors to see through with which to try and get a glimpse of what was happening within the castle walls. There was no reason for her to want to gaze inside the castle walls that she had once called home; the castle walls that she had once stormed to unleash the most hellish curse the Realm had ever seen. With a slight wave of her hand she released the small flame down into the courtyard, setting aflame a small bonfire to keep her men and women warm and comfortable for the night.
Walking quickly through her study she didn't even spare a glance to the only mirror left adorning her walls. Upon entering her bedchambers the light from the fire below the castle flowed across the walls. Quickly exchanging her leathers for a slight shift she sat on her bed and sighed. Here no one could see the brunette falling apart; here she allowed all of her pain and grief to overwhelm her. No one could see that the Evil Queen had finally been brought to her knees. As tears rolled down her face she laid back and let them fall. Here… there were no mirrors.
Several candle marks away from the Queen's castle a bedraggled blonde stumbled through the edges of the Enchanted Forest. She had no idea how long she had been out in the elements, how long since they had all been taken from Storybrooke. Hell, she didn't even know where she was. All she knew was that when she had woken up on the forest floor she had been alone. Henry had been nowhere in sight. She had spent days…week's maybe, searching the surrounding area only to come up with nothing. The only living things she had come across were small animals and the foliage decorating the forest.
Taking a small breather her green eyes surveyed the moon for a second, all she could hope was that her son was safe. She didn't care where, preferably with Mary Margaret or Snow or whoever the hell she was; she even hoped that Henry may have found his way to Regina. She preferred the former, but she also knew in her heart that Regina loved Henry. Minus the turnover incident never once had Regina hurt Henry and even that was unintentional. That turnover was meant for her. So unoriginal she thought with a quiet snort. These weeks in the woods had calmed her some. She thought long and hard about the whole ridiculous situation she had found herself in and the players that had put her there. Being able to calmly think of everything she could maybe put her pinky toe in Regina's shoes and see where she was coming from, but she also knew that after everything that she and Henry had read that there was more to the story. There always was. She never cared for the black and white of fairy tales and now that she was living in one, she'd find the shades of gray that no one knew about; after she found her son.