Hoping & Waiting
Disclaimer: I own nothing!
Makoto's life was woefully routine. Every morning, he got-up shortly after the sun, washed his face, shaved if he needed to, made and had his breakfast. Then he went down stairs and opened-up the trading post. Shortly after, Rei would come down from the palace to stand just inside the trading post. He was a guard employed by the Sheikh and usually the one assigned to Makoto's trading post, which was the most popular trading post if only because Makoto's smile was free with every visit. So, soon after the doors opened, the customers started filing in.
"How long are you going to stay single?" asked an elderly customer, "You need a wife! I have a daughter you know. Very beautiful, hard working, honest and humble."
Makoto smiled, "She sounds wonderful. I am sure she will make a good match soon," which was the answer Makoto always returned to parents seeking to match Makoto up with their daughters.
The day wore on. Shortly after midday, Makoto's lunch was delivered by the boy working for the falafel place. He always ordered enough for both him and Rei. They ate together quickly, not really having time to eat in peace as customers were waiting. The day resumed.
If Rei didn't have to leave at 5 and if Rin, the Sheikh of the oasis town, did not have a policy of trading posts not trading without a guard present, Makoto would probably keep his trading post opened very late. But as it was, he was forced to close at 5. He closed and went out, first stopping at a restaurant to have dinner before going on to a public bathhouse. He was done by 7.
Makoto returned to his trading post and starting the daily paperwork. Counting-up sales, checking stocks, setting aside tax money to send up to the palace with Rei at the end of the week. It was tedious, boring monotonous work. It was his life. No wonder Haru wanted nothing to do with it.
Makoto dropped his pen as a horrible black feeling began to creep-up on him. Why was he doing this? What was the point of any of this? Why was he waiting for Haru when Haru was most likely never going to come back! Why would he? He was free. A bedouin whose home was the entirety of the desert. But who also loved the sea and would always journey back to its shores. But Makoto could not follow. At least, not forever.
He had joined Haru once or twice. But Makoto would quickly tire of travelling, of wandering aimlessly as Haru's navigated the desert based on senses Makoto didn't possess. Miraculously finding water in the most unexpected of places. However, after awhile, even Haru's company wasn't enough to make the endless desert anything but oppressive to Makoto. New towns would break the monotony of desert travel but it would also make Makoto long for his home. His few friends and not to mention his family. In the end, Haru would tell him in that monotonous voice of his, "It's enough. You don't have to force yourself," and they would head back towards Makoto's home town, this town. Where Makoto would wait endlessly for Haru to return.
"Is he going to come back this time?" was a question that would plague Makoto endlessly. Especially since there was no rhythm to Haru's movements. Sometimes he would be back within a few weeks. Other times he would be gone for months. The longest he had been away was a full year. It was actually close to a year now and there was no sign of Haru returning. It made Makoto worry and weary. Weary of waiting with his hope dwindling. Afterall, Haru had only one reason to come into town: Makoto.
"You can't keep doing this," said Rin, "Just find yourself a wife. Get married, have kids and just move on with your life."
"I can't do that," mumbled Makoto was he picked at his food, flatbread, lamb and humus.
It was friday, the day of rest and as was his custom, Makoto had come to have lunch with the Sheikh and his closest advisors. Today, only Nitori was present as Mikoshiba, Rin's other advisor, was away escorting a trade caravan that was travelling along a particularly dangerous route. He was expected back with a week.
Rin snorted, "Look I know you love Haru. I love Haru, not like you of course. Since I am not in love with Haru like you are but this is stupid! He's like the wind! You wind cannot sit still, if it does, it dies," Makoto winched at the rather apt analogy, "But you can't wait for the wind forever!"
"Still doesn't mean I have the right to ruin some poor girl's life by marrying her when I know I can never love her like she deserves!" said Makoto, "Would you have done something like that?"
"Well I didn't have to since I got to marry the person I love," said Rin, "So I don't honestly know. What about you Nitori?"
Nitori jumped, "Ah well… I… ah…" Makoto felt a deep pity on poor Nitori. Everybody in the whole palace knew Nitori was in love with Rin, except Rin himself. As a result he often hurt Nitori without meaning to. "I think its easier if you know for certain that your affection is not returned," Nitori said, just as Makoto opened his mouth to say something to put Nitori out of his misery, "I think its easier to let go when you have no hope," he said sadly.
"Well that won't help here," said Rin, irritably, "We know Haru loves Makoto back and would probably throw a fit of anger so bad that he'll probably be locked in my dungeon for months, should he come back to actually see Makoto married with a kid on the way."
"Which is exactly why I will never betray Haru!" insisted Makoto, "He loves me. I love him and I would be betraying him if I don't stay faithful to him."
"But its hurting you right?" said Rin, "So Haru should just do the right thing and release you."
"Rin! Could you do that things have worked out differently?" wondered Makoto.
There was a muffled laugh behind Makoto, "Give it up, Mako," said a feminine voice, causing all three males to jump to their feet, "You are talking to our former spoilt prince and current spoilt ruling Sheikh. Thus a man who has almost always gotten what he wanted, how could he possibly fathom not getting his way."
"I can fathom!" protested Rin, "Also what are you doing here? You should be resting!"
Aki, Rin's beloved wife rolled her eyes, "I am pregnant not invalid! If I stay in bed any longer I am going to forget out to use my legs."
"Please sit here," said Nitori, going to help Aki to a seat, "Shall I call for more food?"
"No, no I am fine," said Aki, "Just sit back down and finish your lunch," she said.
"Anyway, I think its very selfish to Haru to keep Makoto hanging," said Rin, returning to an earlier topic, "He should just release Makoto. Makoto should get married, have children and thus not be sad and lonely all the time. That's what I think!"
"Rin!" said Makoto in a tone of protest.
Aki laughed, "If only it was that easy! I am sure Mako would die of heartbreak if Haru actually ever did that. Besides, Haru is not gone forever. He'll be back soon and then you really will have to lock him-up to stop him from committing murder suicide."
Rin huffed, "Well I think Makoto's life sucks as it is and something needs to change."
"Well how about we give Nagisa to him?" wondered Aki.
"Eh? Nagisa? But why?" asked Makoto.
"Well you live all by yourself in that trading post and that can't be good for you," said Aki, "I think you only go to your parents house once every fortnight?"
Makoto nodded, his parents lived a little out of the city and had a small shop that was mostly a hobby but did provide a considerable income nonetheless. They traded such goods to travellers who stayed in the designated camping areas outside the city limits to rest overnight and refresh at one edge of the oasis but did not need to come into the city proper. They did this to avoid the city tax but Rin couldn't withhold water and rest from travellers under the desert laws of hospitality (not without making enemies of travellers and earning the ire of his fellow rulers) and so there was a certain amount trade and business opportunity outside the city. It was also risky as the city guards offered no protection out there. But Makoto's parents contended that they were too old to worry about such risks and would enjoy their retirement away from the dust and sometimes overbearing humanity of the city.
Problem was that it took hours for Makoto to walk there. So he only managed the trip every fortnight when he would hire a camel and also pick-up his brother and sister, both of whom lived on the other side of the city from Makoto but somewhat closer to his parents and make a day of it. Indeed, it was still too often that there were times when his brother or his sister wouldn't be able to join him due to some work they had.
"I think if you had more company you might be happier," said Aki, "So why not take Nagisa and train him as your assistant? I am sure you can do with the help."
"I…" he could do with the help but it would free-up time. What use did he have for time? No, no, that was the wrong way to look at it surely. He was becoming boring. Probably too boring for Haru. Probably why Haru was staying away longer and longer. Maybe he could do with the extra time to read more, start practicing more and maybe even start visiting the coffee shops more.
Still, "Why are you trying to get rid of Nagisa?" Makoto wondered.
"He's getting too freaking old," said Rin, "I have already kept him too long as a köçek. Mostly cause he still had that baby face but people are starting to talk."
"Since when have you cared about people talking?" asked Makoto.
"I don't but its not just that," said Rin, "I mean its only a matter of time before Nagisa is just visibly too old to be a 'dancing boy'. Most of the dancing boys my father had during his lifetime ended-up getting sold to seedy brothels no one is supposed to talk about, after they become too old to remain a köçek. From there, well who knows where they ended-up from there once they were too old to get clients. I don't want that for Nagisa. I don't think you do either. So best thing to do is to set him free and he can work with you, getting some skills other than dancing and well, that's a better future then he has to look forward to now."
"He might want to return home," Makoto pointed, "To his family."
"Pfft, they sold him into slavery to pay their taxes!" said Rin, "Would you want to go back?"
"I don't think they had much of a choice," Aki smoothingly pointed out.
"I know that and I am sure Nagisa does too but doesn't change the fact he was seven when he was taken from home. Probably raped and violated several times while on the road before he was sold to the köçek master. Who probably didn't spare the rod or other things while he was trained before he was sold to the merchant who gave him as a gift to us as a wedding present," said Rin, "Even if he wanted to go home, I think he probably shouldn't. Too much has happened."
"Well once you set him free you can't exactly stop him," said Makoto.
"No but I can try dissuade him as a friend, which brings me back to - move on from Haru already!" Rin cried in exasperation.
Makoto returned from Rin's palace feeling drained. He knew Rin meant well but it had been difficult for him to hear Rin's arguments for why he should move on from Haru. Especially now that his hope was at an all time low. Nitori's words didn't help either. "It's easier when you lose all hope…" would there come a time when Makoto would simply except he and Haru were not meant to be? Would he then move on and find someone else? He had never even thought of someone else. Not since the day he met the little bedouin boy by the Oasis. One look in that blue, blue eyes and his heart had been forever stolen. He didn't think he would ever have it back.
Yet, he got so lonely sometimes. Maybe having Nagisa around would help. He had spare rooms. A lot of spare rooms as he lived alone and this place was built to house a family plus a few live-in servants. He didn't have any live-in servants. Just some cleaners who came and cleaned for him couple of times a week. He ate cold breakfasts and both his lunch and dinner came from restaurants. So the kitchen was hardly ever used. He honestly didn't have use for a servant. But maybe he would need one once Nagisa moved in.
Pre-occupied with these thoughts, Makoto walked into his bedroom somewhat oblivious of his surrounding. So he was taken completely unawares when he was pushed against the wall and a hungry mouth descended on him. Kissing him passionately.
"Ha… Haru!" he whispered when he had a chance to speak.
"I missed you," Haru whispered.
Hope and joy and everything else returned to Makoto in full force, "I missed you too," he said as he let his wind caresses him all over.
Author's Note: I wanted to do something with the Arabian AU but this is all I could manage. The Arabian AU is actually very sad if you think about how Makoto is clearly a merchant and thus probably stationary while Haru is clearly travelling. Plus Nagisa is actually made-up as a köçek and while its cute and amusing as he is essentially a male bellydancer, if you look-up the history of the köçek - you know that its not all that peachy. So everything came out a little sad and maybe a tad dark. Aki is Yazaki Aki from High Speed who was a classmate and clubmate of Makoto, Haruka and later Rin when Rin joined Iwatobi elementary and Iwatobi swim club. She didn't make it into the anime. But I have this thing where I like seeing her with one of the boys because of how the four of them (Makoto, Haru, Rin and Aki) are linked by the message bricks.