I see Lilian sitting in the middle of her poorly designed apartment unit, doing what seems to be a mixture of Tai Chi, Yoga, and what seems to be meditation. Ah, Lilian Chastity, a fair-skinned brunette, with a mixture of Irish and Chinese culture. As I wake from my daydream of the girl, I look down from my cloud. Surprised, I shout, "Holy boolprop, your leg just went all the way around and down your back! Boy, these Sims sure are flexible! Doesn't that hurt?"

Lilian, still in her painful looking position with no facial expression whatsoever, calmly states, "Not at all! It doesn't hurt anymore after, oh I don't know, 500 tries? Come on, try it with me! Express yourself!"

Wincing at the thought of my leg twisting all the way around gives me a chill down my spine. And if I DID wanna try it, I can't get down off this goddamn cloud 10,000 feet in the air. I would die getting down. Picture that. A person falling off a cloud in the middle of a virtual world. Did you picture it? Actually, now that I think about it, it wouldn't hurt at all since I'm the Creator, but I still won't go down on my ass and do that god forsaken move. "No, I'm fine up here, thanks.", I say, sounding a bit shaken.

She shrugs and says, "Alrighty then, miss out on all this fun. Wee, I'm having fun! So much FUN!" The crazy Sim then goes berserk all over the apartment. Jumping on the walls, the bed, the couch, even banging on the walls that are connected to the others who chose to stay in the same building as this chicka. She actually looks like she's having a seizure.

Suddenly, there's a bang on the door. She calmly collects herself back to her normal, hippie self. When she answers the door, there's a person that's known all throughout the Sim world. Beating people with purses, yelling senselessly at them, all for showing public affection or public indeceny. Ladies and gentlemen, girls and boys, allow me to introduce the crotchety old hag that is Mrs. Crumplebottom!

Crumple, as I like to call her, is obviously pissed. Then again, what is she NOT pissed about? Her tight bun, tucked inside a beige color bellboy hat with nothing but a daisy as a decoration, accentuates her long, crooked face, especially her wide and often overused mouth. She's dressed in a beige-colored dress that looks more like a straitjacket than a dress. Her beige heels matches with her beige skin tone. Can you guess what this lady's favorite color is? Oh, and don't forget her torture weapon of choice: a black and gold old lady purse filled with who knows what, probably rocks.

"WOULD YOU KEEP IT DOWN!" she yells, making her already loose dentures even more loose. "I AM TRYING TO KNIT A BLANKET!" Obviously, she's never heard of a furniture store. Or a clothing store. Or a hair salon.

"Chill, Mrs. C," Lilian lovingly assures the old hag. "I've only been doing my new Yoga/Tai Chi/Meditation routine." Oh, so I was right! It's a combination of all three! But I knew that.

"CHILL? HOW CAN I 'CHILL' WITH ALL THE WRETCHED NOISE? THIS BUILDING HAS ALWAYS BEEN QUIET UNTIL YOU SHOWED UP, YOU FLOOZY!" she yells again, this time with more spit and more loosening of her dentures. They're practically out of her mouth. And by the way, she says this to all of her neighbors. Even the lovable Michelle Tse. I was actually waiting for Michelle to punch this old man in the face.

"Okay, okay. I'll keep it down, Mrs. Crumplebottom. You have my word as a lady of this fine society of working class citizens." she lies. Then she bluntly states, "Okay, bye." and slams the door in the Crumple's face.

"Nice going, Lils!" I say.