Title: Long Overdue
Rating: T
Pairing(s)/Character(s): James/Lily, Harry
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: Don't own 'em - not making any money off 'em. Dern it.
Word Count: 1,058
Summary: Squib!AU where Voldie never existed. James and Harry have a long overdue conversation
Notes:
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry: Daily Prompt Inspiration Thread - (AU) - Squib!AU
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry: Writing Club - Fun Facts about Names Day - Go online and search up the meaning of your name. That is your prompt. My prompt is listener.
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry: March Event: Jewel-Day Challenge - Amethyst - Ring: Write about Harry Potter and/or Draco Malfoy
TV Show Episode Monthly Competition: The Heart of The Truest Believer - Write about a child (younger than 10)
Ultimate Patronus Quest Challenge: Class E - Insects - 19. Termites: Write about a canon witch/wizard being born squib
Harry Potter stared forlornly at his dad. He was in his Auror robes and would once again be working late. "So, you won't be able to go the play?" he quietly asked. He was playing the toothbrush in a dental hygiene skit, and he would have loved if both of his parents could go.
James looked up from the newspaper. "Can't. Sorry, Harry."
Harry swallowed and ran out of the room as he did his best to hold back his tears. He didn't see his mum enter through the other door.
Lily shook her head. "Why do you do that?" she asked.
James stiffened. "Do what?"
"Hold your son at a distance!" she snapped, the pretense of calmness leaving her.
"I have to work; that's not my fault!" he argued.
"Really? Because I know plenty of Aurors that ask for a night off every now and then when their child has an event. And yet, you never deem Harry's things as important enough to take the night off. Why? Is it because it's all Muggle?"
"Lily, I love my son. I do."
"I know," she agreed softer. "You have to really listen to what I'm about to say. Don't interrupt. Just listen. No matter how much you love him, and I have never said you don't love him, you still hold him at a distance. Harry is a squib. It's not what we wanted or what we expected to happen, but it is what it is. He'll always be a squib and no matter what you do, that will never change. You need to start acting like a father. And that means you go to his things at school like all parents do. Even if it is in the Muggle world."
James looked at her. "I always thought I was open-minded. And I am in a way because if I wasn't, I would have done what many Pure-bloods do and disown Harry. I've never stopped loving him, but I can't help feeling disappointment. Harry will never know the wonder of magic. He'll never be able to experience the absolute joy of flying. He'll be ordinary when he could have been extraordinary. And what if he comes to resent us for not having magic? He's around us, and Sirius, and Remus, and what if he hates us because we have something he doesn't? Maybe he would have been better off if he had gone to live in the Muggle world with adoptive parents when the Healer gave us the news."
Lily shook her head. "Harry would not have been better off because he wouldn't have had us. And yes, sometimes it might bother him, but I don't think he could ever hate us for what we had no control over. The only reason he's hurting right now is because he's afraid his dad isn't proud of him and his accomplishments because they're all Muggle based. He thinks his dad believes he had an unlucky draw when it came to sons. He's afraid his dad doesn't love him. That's what's hurting him. Not lack of magic but lack of a father. Maybe you should do something about that."
James' hazel eyes reflected his pain as he stood up. He walked out of the sitting room and down the hall, to Harry's bedroom. He couldn't remember the last time he stepped inside the small room and guilt overwhelmed him. He knocked on the door and opened it without waiting for an answer. Harry was laying face down on his bed, his face hidden by his pillow. "Harry?"
"What is it, Dad?" His question was muffled.
James gulped, but he decided not to hesitate. "I'm sorry I've been such a lousy dad to you."
Harry looked at him. "I'm sorry that I'm not the kid you want," he answered quietly.
James' heart clenched even more as he moved to sit on the edge of the bed. "Don't even think that. Harry, I love you with my whole heart. If I had another child, I would love you just as much as I loved him or her."
"Even if that kid had magic?" Harry asked. His emerald looked were much too serious in the face of an eight year old which just showed how much James truly missed.
"Of course. I'm sorry I made you doubt that. The thing is..." He paused, as he did his best to find the right words. "...I guess I was scared that you might hate me, or blame me, for not having magic. I thought you might be jealous, and I worried we did the wrong thing when he kept you half in the wizarding world with us and half in the Muggle world."
"You thought you should have abandoned me in the non-magical world!? Harry screeched angrily.
"No, no, of course not. We would have made sure you had a good family, but I thought it might have been easier for you if you hadn't known magic even existed. I was worried you'd hate me and that I messed up your life by not being able to let you go." He wondered if he said the right thing or if he had simply made it worse.
Harry sat up. "Dad, I love you. How could you have done the wrong thing when I want to be with you and Mum? Yeah, I wish I had magic, but I like my school. I like my teachers. I like all of the afterschool activates that I've began participating in. I especially like soccer. And then there's the play I'm doing. I have friends. I'm happy there."
James smiled. "I'm glad you like your school, and I'm sorry that I haven't asked you more about what you're doing there," he apologized.
James bit his bottom lip. Lily had been right. Many Aurors asked for a night off if they had something important to do, and he believed that spending some much needed time with Harry was extremely important, especially when he was doing something for school. His superior would just understand that he couldn't come in that night. "So, tell me about this play your doing. What's your part?"
When Harry eagerly launched into an explanation about teeth and taking care of them, and his part in the whole thing, warmth filled James' heart.
Maybe they'd be okay.