So yeah. This story was nurtured out of my friend Max's inexplicable love for Evan Bourne and my annoyance with bad fan fiction on wrestling. Here I am to cleanse the world one beautiful chapter at a time ;)
Just wanted to say that I put A LOT of work into this. Like, you have no idea. It was originally supposed to be longer, but it would've been a novel by the end! I wanted to mimic the show by making 'episodes,' so that's how my uploads will work. I'm going to use songs from the episodes in the episodes of my story, so you can pretty much get FREE previews if you check the songs used in the Glee Seasons. I'm making a lot of this story up as I go along, but I have a general outline for how things are going to go. Sort of like the actual show :)
If this goes well I might make a WWGlee Season 2, so review and let me know what you think!
The fun part about this story is that wrestlers will be embodying the Glee kids. So imagine all the wrestlers to come as teens in high school! Most of the casting will be quite obvious, but for some you really might have to guess. Two people will be representing one Glee person if I see fit, or maybe even four represent one - it depends on what I want and need for the story. Many of the traits the actual wrestlers have may be mixed in with the character they're representing, so this isn't just me casting people as Glee characters.
~I own nothing of Glee OR the WWE. Now enjoy!
Blooming with joy on a frosty morning was a black-haired boy with a small body and pointed shark-like teeth. He stared into his spotless vanity mirror jubilantly, making sure to check his mouth for any unruly markings. Luckily, there were none.
But his complexion was simply unacceptable.
To fix this he took out his handy 'quick-fix' makeup kit and rushed through it for some cocoa butter lotion. He caressed it smoothly over his pale face, arm, and legs, making sure to avoid staining his favorite royal blue bath robe and matching towel. The towel, of course, covering his head and drying his hair to fabulousness. Cocoa butter lotion gave his skin a tanned, commercial look.
After working on his sadly albino skin he went to work on giving himself a natural 'glow' and 'shine' by brushing over his face with just enough glitter to make him sparkle in the right light. That light being the bright, dazzling ones at his school, Entertainment Boarding School of Performing Arts. Or as everyone called it, the E'.
His fingers were puppetmasters, and his face the puppet. He could prepare himself for school in his sleep by this point. His delicate fingers slid over his face calmly, almost calculatedly, bringing his bone structure to life. The mirror reassured him that he looked flawless, not that it was anything new.
Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who's the most talented of them all? Oh, that's right, I am. Because I am the fiercest boy in all of Ohio. And one day I will make it to Broadway with my amazing talents. That is of course before I marry the man of my dreams and live in the most expensive house the world's ever heard of. Ok, I know that was conceded.
I even know that I was being a complete bitch just now. But what can I say? That's just the dog eat dog world of the E' manifesting itself in me, I guess. But I am not lying. I am the most talented kid at this school, and the most determined. How do you think I landed a single bedroom in this damn place? It sure wasn't by whoring myself out to the Head of Dorms like that slut Maryse. Although I could've gone that route if I really wanted to…
To get what you want in life you have to rely on yourself. No one in the world is ever going to hand you what you want on a silver platter, especially when you're a gay in Ohio. But that's fine by me. All I really care about right now is getting the hell out of this godforsaken town. That's the only reason I even go to this crappy school. Otherwise I'd be homeschooled to death by my dad.
But finally I'm going to get the recognition I deserve. Once I overshadow everyone in the renewed club, there's no way in hell I'll be treated the same. This school tries to be condescending and come off as 'ivy league.' But we all know that that's just some crap that's fed to us once we're all actually here. I learned that the first time that little floozy Maryse had the audacity to slushy my perfectly made up face.
Ugh. I get angry just thinking about it! Well now it's my time to shine. And no one, especially her, is going to stop me. When I'm through with this little club, everyone's going to know the name Evan Bourne.
On that same morning Evan Bourne wasn't the only student at the E' prepping himself for what was to come. Elsewhere two divas were practicing their runs without fault, hitting every note they aimed for, and aiming higher as they hit them. The two, known as Jark to their school, teased one another's hair and practiced facials in their vanity. They even rehearsed when and how they would snap their fingers during their performance. Rehearsing came as naturally as singing did to the flamboyant pair.
Above the two screams could be heard from heavy rock music. A dark-haired boy screeched his lungs out to a song, earning an appearance from his roommate. "Dude! What the hell are you fucking listening to? This shit just woke me up!" The boy's roommate was practicing heavily for an up-coming football game and was trying to rest as much as possible.
The brawny blonde promptly shut down his roommate's operation and fell into the bathroom begrudgingly. "Whatever, dude. Look, did I sound good?" The blonde snapped his head back and glared pointedly.
"Good?" The blonde's anger dropped and he stated, "Yeah… It was good, whatever."
The dark-haired Asian bowed his head and dropped his mic. He mustered a "whatever" before shoving on a jacket and rushing out of his room. He passed two of his future contenders, Melina Perez and Rosa Mendes. The two were cheerleaders at the prestigious school and close friends. They always walked with their pinkies linked, sashaying through the halls with purpose. This time their purpose was Room 114, the computer room.
The two waltzed into the room, unsurprised by the group of rebels sleeping comfortably in the computer chairs. Melina arched an eyebrow as Rosa commented gloomily, "Lord Tubbington sleeps like this, but he won't let me pet his chair." Melina rolled the comment off of her shoulders as she usually did, pouncing on one of the sleeping boys and yelping.
"Oh my God! There's a fire! Get up, there's a fire!" She darted about the room, waking all of the boys with her false story. She ended her tirade in the middle row of computers, screeching at the top of her lungs. One of the boys spat at her, "Oh shut the fuck up you bitch. Leave us alone!" Melina seemed unfazed by the comment, quickly responding with a fake 'cutesy' voice.
"How about me and Rosa stay, and you fuckers get out?" Melina faked an excited expression, throwing her arms in the air as though she'd made a fantastic discovery. When no one moved she bluntly stated, "Get out now or I'll post the pics of your tiny dicks all over the E' Guy Sluts page on Facebook."
At this the boys picked up their pace, grabbing their belongings and fleeing the room before Melina could even get out her sarcastic "thank you."
Melina plugged her IPod up to one of the sound systems in the room and started rehearsing her and Rosa's routine for the auditions that were going on that day. Rosa stayed still, asking blankly, "Do you hear that?" Melina stopped her routine and asked Rosa what she was talking about. "Lord Tubbington said we're gonna win." Melina let a small grin grace her face for a few moments before softly guiding Rosa into her positioning and telling her, "There's nothing to win hun, but that's great."
The two proceeded to work on their complicated dance steps as a determined girl made her way to a certain principal's office. She had a demure floral yellow dress on with white buttons down the middle. Her stockings led to plain white shoes, matched with her signature hair clip that held her bangs out of her face.
Right before she reached the principal's door she found her path interjected by one Vince Sylvester. "Lisa Maria Varon, where exactly do you think you're heading with those hideously coordinated stockings and that unquestionably grandma store-bought dress?"
Lisa's face dropped and she hesitated to speak for a minute. "Well, I was just going to tell how thankful I am that she's finally decided to renew Glee club. I-I mean that was one of my dad's favorite pa-"
"Okay, and with that you've reminded me why it is a colossal waste of time for faculty to try and engage in normal banter with the hormone-dogs that are high school teenagers. This never happened, our conversation was never initiated, and I'm going to leave pretending that my eyes aren't burning from those disgusting penny loafers." Vince licked his lips animatedly and shoved his way past Lisa.
The immaculate hallways were left with the usually-spunky girl tucking lose hairs behind her head and frowning at the ground. She glanced back at the Principal's Office once more, deciding against it and instead heading back to her own room to rehearse.
Perhaps the most excited of all the people at the E' for the returning Glee Club was Matt Striker. He'd fought for it to return, and most of it was due to the great memories he cherished from when he was in the E's previous Glee Club. He lied in bed all night pondering who the new club would consist of and how amazing it would be to perform again. He realized that he was going to be teaching the club, but those who teach must also do.
He got no sleep that night due to the buzz that renewing Glee club had caused him. When his alarm clock sounded he quickly shut it off, making sure to keep from waking his wife Terri. He kissed his sleeping wife on the forehead and ran to the bathroom like a child on Christmas' morning. He showered briskly, cooking breakfast at the speed of light and scribbling a note for Terri about the groceries. With his handy v-neck vest and plaid pants at hand, he headed off for Entertainment Boarding School.
Matt checked himself in the mirror of his Volkswagen, wanting to look extra-professional that day. He'd even gone as far as using the tooth whitening stuff Terri had tried pushing on to him in the past. It certainly required some finesse, but the results were definitely worth it. He smiled all the way to the school, even when he was cut off at a red light.
The school was as 'teenage' as ever, and he couldn't help but feel something special coming. Matt tried to let the day pass by as quickly as possible, tingling with the anxiousness of Glee Club auditions. His Spanish class was an added bonus to his chipper mood, until finally the moment of truth came. Who was going to make it into Glee Club, and who wasn't.
Matt marched into the massive school auditorium like a man on a mission. He happily walked down the stairs past the massive amounts of chairs in the arena-like room. Taking the pen from behind his ear and placing it neatly on top of his notepad, Matt took a seat at the front desk of the auditorium and called out, "Let's begin!"
Lisa Marie made her way to center stage.
The rest went somewhat downhill from there.
All the children had talent and made it into the club, not that there were many auditions anyway, but they all had their own shares of problems. Whether it was stage presence, overbearing theatricality or overall attitude, there was a lot to be done. By the end of the auditioning process only thirty minutes out of the scheduled three hours had passed and Matt Striker was banging his head against the desk in front of him.
I just don't get it. These kids got into this school for performing arts, so why are they so… Difficult. And why didn't more audition? It makes no sense. I mean, when I was in high school Glee Club was the coolest thing you could be a part of. Actually, if you weren't in Glee Club you were pretty much a nobody… So what's missing here? Is it me? Maybe the kids have heard about my tough teaching methods.
Maybe it's the cologne I wear that Terri tells me to stay away from… Whatever it is, we need more members. And the current members aren't exactly the best either.
What the hell was I thinking?
Before the audition fiasco everything seemed to be going perfectly. Well, before it was all a catastrophe.
McMahon had called Striker and several of the other teachers at the E' in for a meeting. Apparently a change was coming that was going to affect everyone's lives. Before the meeting the general feeling amongst the teachers was nervousness. Were there budget cuts? It could be worse. One thing was for sure - it wasn't good.
Everyone cautiously entered the wooden office and crowded around McMahon. She cut right to the chase. "The state of Ohio wants to shut down the Entertainment Boarding School of Performing Arts."
Immediately chatter broke out between the faculty. Mothers worried about their children, others complained about their mortgage, and Matt was just shocked. He looked around, trying to find something to bring him back to reality. All he could think about was how Terri was going murder him for working as a teacher, and how his parents would tell him how he should've avoided Ohio altogether.
As he wondered McMahon let the statement sink in herself before continuing. "Now I know this must be disconcerting for you all, and I'm sure it's come as a surprise, but there's nothing we can do. The school is in debt thousands of dollars, and unless someone magically comes up with the money there's nothing we can do about it."
Angrier conversations erupted after she made her statement, and false accusations didn't falter either. Everyone seemed to blame McMahon for what was going on. "Wait a second," Matt broke in mid-commotion. "Sylvester, what about you? Aren't you like a self-made millionaire?"
Vince hiked up his track pants and crossed his arms, "Yes, and that is precisely why it does not affect me whether or not this school stays open. I only do this to earn more trophies off of the masochistic little turds that actually enjoy physical labor."
No one said anything. They'd learned a long time ago that what Sylvester said, went. You didn't argue with Vince because there was no way to argue with him. It would be like trying to head to a destination but ending up in never-ending circles with the stony man. Matt decided to press on.
"What about another loan, we could all pitch in by giving up a percentage of our salaries."
"Out of the question," responded McMahon. "We're too far in debt already to take out another loan, even if you did all give up some of your paychecks." At this Matt bit his lower lip. He drew his eyebrows together questioningly when soon an idea came to him.
"What about a Glee Club?"
Stephanie thought this over for a few moments, drawing her eyebrows together in deep thought. Matt arched an eyebrow, staring at Stephanie like his entire life was in her hands, which it was in a way. It felt like centuries before his boss answered. "Is that even possible with how much money we owe?"
Matt perked up, "Of course it is! We could have fundraisers for any of the materials we need, and as I'm sure you know, winning the nation-wide Glee competition earns the winning school one hundred thousand smackorunies!"
The office was frozen in time, all the teachers holding their breath to see what the outcome of this idea would be. They all hoped their boss would go for it, not that they had any other options. Vince was the only one who didn't care for the idea, scowling in the corner of the room. Stephanie let out a breath and threw her hands up in the air, "Oh what the hell, why not?"
The room burst into excited chatter, many people clasping their hands and sighing exaggeratedly. One of the teachers asked, "Wait a minute, who's gonna get this thing up and running?" The boss-lady answered. "Well, since this whole thing is Matt's idea, why not him?" At this a goofy grin found itself upon Matt's face.
"I'd love to run Glee Club!" The teachers nodded and spoke in agreement, leaving the stifling office when Stephanie shooed them all away in need of space for her never-ending work. She told Matt to get auditions ready before they left and everything was set.