House: She hates me, you know that don't you?
Cuddy (standing at the sink, washing a coffee cup) She doesn't hate you. She hasn't known you that long. Give her time.
(Cuddy walks over to the table and sits next to House) It's not a big deal. Jaimie called. She got etoured around that accident on the bridge. She'll be here in twenty minutes, half and hour at the most.
House: And you can't wait for twenty minutes.
Cuddy: I told you I have a meeting.
House: So, last meeting I went to I was an hour late.
Cuddy: An hour and a half, I know it was with me.
(she is getting frustrated) Look, you don't have to do anything. She's had a bath, she's dressed, she's fed. All I need you to do is sit here in the same room with her. If a fire starts, grab the baby and hobble outside as fast as you can. If she starts to choke, if she has a seizure, if she stops breathing then save her. You're good at that. Besides, its not like you were actually going to start getting ready to go to work.
House: So that's it.
Cuddy: That's what?
House: This is just some stupid plot to try and get me to start going to work on time. Forget it
Cuddy (sarcastically) Oh, no. You figured it out. I caused a four car crash in order to ...
(she smiles) nope, not going to work House. You want me to get mad, start arguing and forget the time. Not happening. (she starts toward the door) Call if you need me.
House: (looking over his shoulder at the closing door) I need you!
/
Wilson is in his office, the phone rings
House: Anybody about to die?
Wilson: Not that I am aware of. Why?
House: I need you at Cuddy's now. Its an emergency
Wilson: Is everybody alright.? What...
House: We're fine. I just think that Social Services may be coming to take the baby.
Wilson: What? My god, why?
House: Cuddy left the baby alone with a known drug addict.
Wilson: Ex-drug addict and what the hell are you talking about?
House: First of all, it is a known fact that most addicts relapse nine or ten times before they stay clean. So I have at least five left. Could happen any time.
Wilson: Five left. When did you...
House interrupts him "Tell you when you get here"
Wilson: And where is Jaimie?
House; When she got her I noticed she had a rash on her arm You know how overly protective Cuddy is. I sent her home.
Wilson: Well, all I have on my calendar is a meeting with a pharmacy rep. I can get out of that. But just so I'm clear. There is no emergency. You're just baby sitting you're bored and you want company.
House: I am not baby sitting.
Wilson: House, are you sitting down?
House yeah
Wilson Is there a baby in the room?
House yeah.,
Wilson Congratulations, you are officially baby sitting
House: Are you coming or not?
Wilson Be there in an hour
House Good, bring beer and a pack of cards.,
House and Wilson are at the table, Each has a bottle of beer and is holding cards. Cuddy walks in, At first she can only see House
Cuddy: I don't believe it. You haven't moved since I left.
(She sees Wilson) What is going on here?
Wilson: It isn't like it looks. He was actually being protective.
Cuddy (glances at House's hand) Protective of what. A pair of sixes.
Wilson to House "Explain it"
House You're doing fine.
Wilson: Jaimie had a rash and he was afraid she might give it to Rachel so he sent her home
Cuddy: Jaimie isn't here. Where's Rachel? House, where is Rachel?
House: In the living room watching TV. She's in her cage
Cuddy: (as she goes towards the living room) It's called a Playpen
House: Sure, put a baby alligator in that thing and its a cage.
Cuddy (from the living room almost yelling) What is she watching ?
House; Discovery channel. Stories from the Delivery Room. she hasn't got many life experiences, I figured that was something she could relate to.
Cuddy comes back to the kitchen, sits down next to House. She speaks in a very controlled voice
Cuddy: You used my daughter to get out of clinic duty.
House (in the same tone of voice) I would use you daughter your mother, your crazy sister and your senile aunt to get out of clinic duty and you know it.
They stare at each other for a moment
House: Besides it wasn't just clinic duty. There was that budget report you have been harping on about for a month.
Cuddy, Oh, I did that last week, I signed it for you
House And that meeting
Cuddy: Oh no. That's today. (Very upset checks her watch) Look, we can still make it. Wilson, you watch Rachel. House get dressed, now
House Nope
Cuddy We don't have time for this. Get dressed go in your pajamas, I don't care
House (raising his voice) I have been telling you for a week I cannot go to a meeting with Dave Kline
Cuddy You have been whining for a week. I told you this is important
House Then you should listen to me. I go to a meeting with this guy whatever you're planning is done, over, not happening.
Cuddy Will you just stop, How could you possibly even know David Kline?
Wilson( looks up smiling) "Dave Kline. The Dave Kline?
House nods: Please tell her.
Wilson: It's the truth. He does know him and there is no way he can go to a meeting with Dave Kline. Seriously. You would not want to have to deal with that.
Cuddy: Your name was on the memo. He didn't say anything
House; Doesn't actually know my name. More of a facial recognition thing.
Cuddy looks defeated. "Fine, I'll get Foreman to go"
House "good choice"
Cuddy (she goes toward the living room ) I'll just say good bye to Rachel, then I'll call... Oh god, they're showing sex change operations now.
Wilson (jumps up) I've got it.
Cuddy goes to leave but House blocks her with his cane
House: No good bye kiss
Cuddy just stares at him
House: "I'll cook dinner'
Cuddy smiles "I want stir fry"
House "sure"
A quick kiss and she leaves
Wilson comes back sits down and takes a drink of beer
Wilson "Who's Dave Kline?"
House "No clue"