Howdy. Ever listen to Cudi's song, Up, Up, and Away? Well, I have, multiple times. Almost every time that I did, I could imagine Ed running around the cul-de-sac, just living life in his usual carefree way. So, in my first attempt at a song fiction, I decided to create this story. Also, I plan on plugging an Ed, Edd, 'n' Eddy series that I just dropped, so you've been warned. Anyway, no more delaying, time to let you read the story.


The sun beamed through his basement window, alerting the boy that it was time to start the day. He looked around his room, carefully observing that his models and comic books were still in the places he had scattered them. He noticed that he had left his TV and VCR on again, the snow on the screen showing that his movie had finished long before he woke up. As he looked, a growing happiness began to overtake his mind, causing him to grow a large smile.

"GOOD MORNING!" the boy shouted as he stretched his arms out wide, as if he were preparing to hug the world. He rose out of his bed, brushing his hands off on his undershirt. He walked towards his bathroom and grabbed his toothbrush. His gaze began on the toothpaste that his mother had left for him on the sink, then switched towards the bath tub filled with the fresh batch of gravy he had prepared the day before. He grinned as he dipped his toothbrush into the tub and proceeded to brush his teeth with his favorite food group.

"Still fresh," he commented as he swallowed the swill. He went back into his bedroom and grabbed his jeans that he left on the ground near his bed. As he jumped into them, he reached into his blue arm-chair and pulled out his red-and-white striped t-shirt and threw it up into the air. He held his arms up, expecting the shirt to fall down over him. Instead, it fell a few feet behind him. He stood there patiently for a few minutes, then began to look around in confusion. He noticed that it had landed back on the chair and chuckled.

"Better luck next time," he told himself as he slipped the shirt on. He sat down in his chair and pulled his shoes out from underneath. As he finished tying the laces, he looked up at the water pipe that hung over his bed and saw that his green jacket was draped over it. He jumped up, grabbing it by the sleeve as he made his way down. He slipped the jacket back on, making sure that his lucky cheese wedge and fish skeleton were safe in his pockets.

"Now, what did I have to do today?" he wondered to himself. He scratched his unibrow as he tried his hardest to remember what his friends had told him yesterday.

Remember, Ed, Double D's voice echoed in his head. Be sure to meet us by the lane tomorrow.

Yeah, Lumpy, Eddy's voice said. I got the best idea for a scam and we gotta get it done ASAP!

"Double D? Eddy?" Ed called out. "Where are you? I can't see you!" He began to look under his bed and through his closet for his friends.

Ed, we're figments of your imagination, Double D's voice explained. You won't find our real-life counterparts in your room.

Yeah, what Sockhead said, Eddy's voice added. If you want to find us, then get your butt down to the lane, NOW!

"Ok, Eddy," Ed said. He laughed as he climbed through his window to get into his backyard. He made his way out of the gate and took off in a run towards the lane, his smile still on his face.


Ed ran towards the lane, noticing his friends were standing around a large robot made of cardboard boxes for its torso and head, trash cans for its arms and legs, and other various components for its hands and feet. He made sure to stop right in front of the behemoth, admiring how similar it looked to the robot in his comic book series, Nitrozilla Versus. As his mind began to picture the giant, mutated komodo dragon breathing an acid cloud towards the super mech, Double D noticed his friend and turned away from his work to properly greet him.

"Hello, Ed," Double D greeted his friend cheerfully. Eddy was too distracted by delusions of how this scam would make him rich to greet Ed, but seeing as how this was a common occurrence, Ed didn't mind it.

"Hey, guys," Ed said with a smile. This broke Eddy out of his trance to turn his attention to his friend.

"Hey, Lummox," he said. "Didn't think you'd show up on time."

"Of course I did, Eddy," Ed said. "You and Double D reminded me this morning." This caused Eddy and Double D to look at each other. Double D shook his head, while Eddy shrugged.

"Ed, we never went to your house this morning," Double D informed.

"Yeah, Lumpy," Eddy added. "We've been here, working on the scam."

"But you guys told me that you weren't in my room this morning," Ed explained. "You told me that you were Fig Newtons of my Imogen Hep Zion." Double D immediately approached his friend, waving his hand in front of his face.

"Did you eat a balanced breakfast this morning, Ed?" he asked as he inspected Ed's lack of response to the motions.

"What do you mean, Double D?" Ed asked. Eddy pushed his two friends away from each other, looking annoyed at the antics that were taking priority to his scam.

"Ed's fine, Double Doc," he said. "He's got an important job to do today. Right, Ed?" Ed smiled wide, eager to start helping his friends.

"RIGHT, EDDY!" he shouted gleefully. Eddy smiled at his friend's enthusiasm.

"Alright, Burrhead, here's what you get to do," Eddy said as he wrapped an arm around Ed's shoulder. "Now, I want you to go to the kids around the Cul-de-Sac. Following me so far, Ed?" Ed grinned as he confirmed with a nod.

"Good," Eddy said. "All you got to do is get them to come here to see our security robot in action. Just say what I wrote on this card. Got it?"

"Got it, Eddy," Ed said with a thumbs up. He immediately grabbed the card and ran back into the neighborhood, eagerly searching for kids to take part in his friends' latest plan.


Ed had made his way into the playground, his search for the kids fruitless up until that point. He saw that Sarah and Jimmy were sitting in the sandbox. Jimmy seemed to be crying while Sarah was consoling him. Ed, oblivious to what might be wrong, ran up to his baby sister and her friend with a large smile on his face.

"HI, JIMMY!" he shouted cheerfully. "HI, SARAH!" Sarah shot her brother an angry look.

"Not now, Ed!" she growled. "Can't you see that Jimmy's upset?"

"Why must life be so cruel, Sarah?" Jimmy sobbed. "Oh, the torment!" Ed felt slightly upset for Jimmy, but he remembered what Eddy had told him and immediately began to get the kids to come to the lane. He pulled out the card and squinted as he tried to interpret Eddy's handwriting.

"Uh, 'Ever worry about what will happen to you next?'" he read. "'Want to make sure life's unness...uh...unness...'" As he stumbled over the words, Sarah immediately grabbed the card out of his hand and tore it to pieces.

"Tell Eddy that we aren't going anywhere until we get Jimmy's doll back!" she shouted at her brother.

"Uh, where did the doll go?" Ed asked.

"A bird swooped down from the sky and snatched Mr. Yum Yum from the sandbox!" Jimmy explained. "He flew into that tree! He'll leave scratch marks on Mr. Yum Yum!" He pointed towards the nearby tree. Ed scratched his head, trying to think about what he should do.

"I got an idea!" Ed shouted. "Don't you worry, Jimmy. Ed is here to help." He made his way to the tree, grabbing it by both sides. He began to pull down on the tree, causing the trunk to sink into the earth with each pull. As he made his way into the branches, he noticed a purple stuffed bunny inside a nest. He carefully grabbed the toy with care and brought it towards the sandbox.

"Mr. Yum Yum!" Jimmy cheered. "Oh, thank you, Ed! How could I ever repay you?" As Jimmy held his doll tightly, Ed smiled his usual smile.

"Come to the lane to see what Double D made!" he said. "It's a cool robot!" Before Sarah could tell her brother to get lost, Jimmy began to nod.

"Ok, Ed," he said. "Sarah and I will be there soon."

"Gravy!" Ed smiled. He immediately took off again in search for the other kids. It wasn't long before he came across Kevin, Rolf, and Nazz, who were all sitting in Rolf's backyard.

"Behold, as Rolf proves his dominance of the sack of kicking," Rolf boasted as he held a small, multi-colored bean bag in his hand.

"Just kick the hacky sack, Rolf," Kevin groaned. Nazz giggled at their antics.

"Ok, Rolf," she said. "The record's 42 kicks, and you gotta make sure that you don't use the same move more than three times in a row."

"Silence, Go-go Nazz girl!" Rolf shouted. "Now watch and be amazed at Rolf's, how you say, skillz." As he threw the hacky sack up into the air, Ed snuck up behind him.

"HIYA, ROLF!" he shouted. The noise caused Rolf to jump up and hit the hacky sack with his head. The kids watched as it flew towards Victor, who proceeded to casually eat it. Rolf and Kevin looked at Ed with anger in their eyes, while Nazz looked disappointed.

"Smooth move, Dork," Kevin scowled.

"Dork?" Ed repeated.

"You have stirred the cucumbers pickling in the barrel!" Rolf burst out. "Dim-witted Ed-boy had better come up with a proper reason for your tom foolery or you shall face the wrath of Nano's shoehorn!" Ed stood there as the three kids waited for an explanation, forgetting what he had approached them for.

"Oh, yeah," Ed said, snapping his fingers. "We got this really cool thing at the end of the lane. You gotta come see!" Nazz and Rolf looked intrigued, while Kevin refused to buy into it.

"Not this time, Dorkenstein," he said. "You and your friends won't get a single cent out of us this time!"

"Come on, Kev," Nazz said. "If Ed's this excited about it, it's gotta be something fun."

"It's a giant robot Double D built," Ed began to explain. "It looks just like the one in the comic series, Nitrozilla Versus!" Ed began to roar and stomp around, trying to imitate the monster. His imitations caused Rolf and Nazz to chuckle, while Kevin rolled his eyes.

"Give me a break," he said. "Double Dweeb couldn't build a giant robot." This caused Ed to break out of his imagination and stare at Kevin in disbelief.

"It's true, Kevin!" Ed insisted. "You gotta come see it! It's way big!"

"Come on, Kevin," Rolf said. "Rolf is intrigued by the Ed boys man of machinery."

"Yeah, it sounds kinda cool," Nazz added with a smile, causing Ed to blush and look at his shoes nervously. Kevin crossed his arms as he let out an audible sigh.

"Fine, but if you three try anything dorky, I'll pound ya!" he threatened, shaking his fist as he scowled at Ed. Ed ignored the threat and gave a big smile.

"Follow me!" he shouted as he took off full speed back to the robot, leaving the kids behind.

"ED, WAIT!" Nazz shouted. Her cries failed to stop Ed, as he was too excited to see the robot in action.


Ed approached his friends, his excitement still clear on his face. He saw that Double D was tinkering with a remote control that had two sticks and four buttons while Eddy was standing over him.

"Come on, come on!" he said. "Is it done yet, Double D?"

"Patience, Eddy," Double D responded. "Advanced robotics is a very delicate science that requires the utmost care and attention to every detail in order to make sure..."

"Blah, blah, blah," Eddy interrupted, moving his hand like a mouth. "When will it be done?" Double D ignored Eddy's inquires as he continued to fiddle around with the controller. After a few minutes, he held up the controller.

"Complete!" he shouted in joy. Ed began to clap his hands as he ran towards his friend.

"OOH! OOH!" he shouted. "Can I play with the robot?" Eddy immediately slapped his hands away. Ed put his hands in his mouth in trying to cut the stinging sensation.

"No way, Ed!" Eddy said. "You'll break the robot before we can auction it off!"

"Oh, come on, Eddy," Ed insisted. "Pleeaase!"

"I'm afraid I must agree with Eddy, Ed," Double D said. "I shall handle the demonstration of the robot while you and Eddy handle the auction." Ed sulked but obeyed. As the trio made the finishing touches on the robot, Ed looked up and saw Sarah, Jimmy, Rolf, Nazz, and Kevin making their way towards them.

"Look!" Ed said excitedly. "The kids are here!" Eddy looked over and smiled coyly.

"Perfect," he grinned. "Get the robot ready, Double D."

"Roger, Eddy," Double D said. As he prepared the robot for its showcase, the kids gathered around.

"See, Kev," Nazz commented. "Ed was telling the truth!"

"Rolf has never seen such a statue before," Rolf commented as he rubbed his eyes in disbelief.

"Wow, Jimmy, look at the size of that thing!" Sarah gasped. At that moment, Eddy began to start putting the finer works of his scam into action.

"LADIES AND NON LADIES!" he shouted. "Have you ever wanted a little extra security? Something to keep the birds off of your roof? Help you get some sleep at night? Well, we Eds have the exact solution that will put all your worries to rest. Meet..." He paused to pull the name card that Double D prepared for him out of his pocket, only to stare at it.

"What the heck does this say, Double D?" he asked his friend, who shook his head.

"It says, 'Prototype: Epsilon-Delta Mk. I', Eddy," he said, making sure that the kids could hear him as well.

"Right," Eddy said as he tossed the card away. "What Sockhead said! Fire it up, Double D!" Double D pressed the buttons on the controller, causing the robot to spring to life. It flexed its hands and moved its head, causing the kids and Ed to stare wide-eyed at the marvel.

"Ain't he a beauty?" Eddy asked. "Let's start the bidding at a buck. Do I hear one dollar, anyone?" The kids immediately began to throw up their hands to make their bids, causing Eddy to see dollar signs. Ed walked over towards Double D, who was busy controlling the ED Mk. I.

"It really does look like the robot from the comic, Double D," Ed said in a trance like voice. His eyes seemed to glaze over, as if all he could focus on was the robot's movements.

"Thank you, Ed," Double D said. "While I had my doubts, it seems that this plan might be our greatest in the short list of our successes. I can't imagine what could go wrong."

"Ooh, looky what our men are up to, girls," a familiarly gruff voice called out, causing everyone, except for Ed, to look back in fear. Their gaze was met with the trio of sisters that had tortured them ever since they moved into the trailer park. A blonde in a white t-shirt and red shorts stood at the far left, her buck teeth accenting her evil smile. A blue-haired girl in a black tank top and green cargo pants stood to the right, her hands crossed over chest and a smirk on her face. A girl with a mound of red curls stood in the center with her hands on her hips, wearing her usual red polka-dotted shirt and blue jeans.

"Kankers..." Eddy growled. As the girls approached the crowd, all the kids immediately ran off for safety, leaving the Eds alone to face their enemies.

"HEY!" Eddy shouted. "You Kankers cost me a lot of money!" The red-head approached him and began to pinch his cheeks.

"Awww...isn't he cute, Marie?" she said. "He's angry again." The blue haired Kanker was drawing hearts with her finger on Double D's chest, who was too afraid to run.

"Not as cute as my Oven Mitt, Lee," Marie said slyly. The blonde Kanker stood by Ed, pouting as her attempts to get him to focus on her failed.

"Big Ed's ignoring me!" she cried. As she began to sob, Lee and Marie walked away from their respective Eds and inspected hers.

"Geez, May," Lee said as she waved a hand in front of Ed's face. "Guess all that TV finally rotted his brains."

"I thought that was the only way he'd end up tolerating Bucky," Marie joked as she started smacking Ed's head, getting no response out of him in return. May broke out of her depression and proceeded to tackle her sister.

"HANDS OFF MY MAN!" she screamed. The two sisters began to beat whatever senses they both had out of each other while Lee turned her attention back to Eddy.

"So, Short Stack," she began. "How about we skip to the good part?" She puckered her lips, causing Eddy to cower in fear. He looked over to the ED Mk. I and suddenly regained his confidence.

"I don't think so, Kanker!" he cried defiantly. "Double D! FIRE UP THE ED MK. I!" Double D was still petrified from his close encounter and didn't register Eddy's command. Lee, however, managed to get a plan together. She grabbed her two sisters and pulled them apart.

"Sic 'em, May!" she barked, tossing her sister at Double D. He snapped out of his terror to see May descending towards his position.

"GOOD LORD!" he cried out as she body slammed him into the dirt. The remote flew out of his hands and landed at the feet of Marie. She picked up the controller, and put two and two together when she looked at the robot.

"Thanks for the present, Oven Mitt!" she called out mockingly. As she played with the controller, the ED Mk. I sprang back to life and began to approach its creators menacingly. Double D and Eddy hid behind Ed, who throughout all the turmoil, stood in the same spot with the same blank smile on his face.

"Ed!" Eddy shouted. "We need you now, Lumpy!"

"Your help would be appreciated now, Ed," Double D added nervously. "Ed?" As they called out to him, Ed had raised his hands above his head, his teeth bared and fingers making claws.

"I AM NITROZILLA, AND I CHALLENGE YOU TO A THROWDOWN!" he shouted at the top of his lungs.


In the middle of a destroyed city, where few buildings had survived, Ed towered over the rubble. He looked defiantly towards a large mech that with cannons and rocket boosters on its back. The mech gestured for Ed to come forth and fight, to which he responded by pounding his chest. He charged at his opponent with his arms held out to his sides. The mech assumed a defensive stance, catching Ed's fists in mid punch. The two struggled against the other's strength for a few minutes, then the robot brought it's knee up to Ed's gut. The boy-turned-monster grunted as he slid back, but grinned as he looked up.

"Face the power of my ATOMIC SLASH!" he shouted as he rose his right arm in the air. The air began to circle around his arm as a light green glow began to radiate from his hand. He held his arm across his chest and charged at the robot. As he rapidly approached his target, he slashed at the midsection, causing the robot to fly towards a skyscraper. The building came crashing down, dust and debris covered the area. While Ed knew that his attack hit dead on, he stood unfazed as the mech rose from the rubble. The atomic slash had left a jagged scar on its chest plating.

"Polymordium armor," Ed said aloud. "The scientists went all out for this fight, but they shall all see that NITROZILLA CANNOT BE DEFEATED!" The mech aimed his arms at Ed, it's forearm cannons locking onto their target. Ed stood his ground as the cannons fired two large balls of red, pulsing energy. He held his hands out and caught the blasts, smirking at his skill. He then tossed them to his sides, the left one flying towards the distance and the right one landing into the nearby ocean.

"You want to play baseball, Bolt Bucket?" Ed taunted as he walked towards a radio tower. "Guess that means I'm next on deck!" He ripped the tower out of the ground with one hand and gripped it like a baseball bat. He charged at the mech, who had clapped its hands together. The wind pressure sent Ed skidding back, but also allowed him to notice that more red energy glowed from the hands. The mech formed a fist with his right hand and pulled them apart. As it did that, a red katana-like blade formed in its right hand. The mech took on a samurai's battle stance, while Ed chuckled.

"Make your move," he said. The two starred each other down for a few seconds, then as if on cue, both opponents charged at the other. Their weapons clashed as they met, causing a sonic blast to echo throughout the battle field. Ed and the mech stood, backs facing the others. Ed fell to one knee, grabbing at a cut on his arm.

"Lucky shot," he muttered as he stood up. He turned and saw that the robot's energy blade had dissipated, giving him some hope. He crossed his arms, focusing all of his power for the final blow.

"I'll admit, you put up one good fight," Ed monologued. "But it's time to end you, once and for all!" He ran towards the mech at full speed, unfazed at how it had engaged it's rockets and began to fly upwards in an attempt to dodge.

"You make this too easy!" Ed shouted as he jumped up. He grabbed his opponent in both hands, holding it in a military press position. The two titans hovered in midair, as if gravity could no longer contain their might.

"The final finisher!" Ed cried out as his entire body glowed light green. "NITRO DROP!" Ed began to shift his weight, causing the two to plummet back to Earth. Ed kept the robot in his hands as he pitched himself forward, putting his opponent in between him and the ground. The earth shattered underneath the contact point, jagged rocks shot up and formed a barrier around the warriors. Ed stood up and looked to his feet where the shattered parts of the mech layed scattered. He rose his hands up to the sky and let out a mighty roar, basking in the victory he had obtained.

"ED!" a familiar voice cried out, causing Ed to stop celebrating his triumph and stare blankly into the distance.

"GOOD LORD, MAN!" another voice called to him. "CONTROL YOURSELF!"


Ed blinked his eyes and saw that he was back in the lane. He looked around and saw that the Kankers were fleeing back to the Park-n-Flush trailer park. He also noticed that the ED Mk. I was in pieces around the lane. He scratched his head in confusion.

"Ed, you idiot!" Eddy shouted as he grabbed his friend by the collar. "You took our biggest payday opportunity and destroyed it!"

"Eddy, be fair!" Double D said as he began rummaging through the parts. "He was only trying to protect us from the Kankers, and he succeeded. Doesn't that count for something." Eddy ignored his friend's pleas and continued to scowl at Ed, who had resumed staring back into space with a smile on his face.

"Well, Lummox," Eddy began, "what do you have to say for yourself?"

"Absolutely nothing, Eddy," Ed said simply. Eddy slapped his forehead while Double D chuckled to himself.


Well, that was it. What did you think? Honestly, my favorite part of the story was Edzilla versus ED Mk. I, but I'm just an action junkie like that. If you had a part you liked, disliked, etc. let me know in a review.

As well as writing this story for the sheer fun of it, I also wanted to get a shot at addressing the mainstream EEnE readers about a crossover I'm writing. It's a EEnE/Bully(Rockstar game) crossover, where the Eds get sent to Bullworth Academy and go through a school year there. The focus is solely on the Eds due to the fact that they take the place of Jimmy Hopkins from the game. I was just unsure on whether or not the story would be advertised well enough from the crossover zone, so I figured that this message could help it get some more following. Fingers crossed!

Peace.