The plane was finally starting its descent down into the Phoenix Airport. Finally, I would be going home. Not that Phoenix was my home, but Bella, my beloved Bella, was everything to me, home included. Home is where the heart is after all. And my heart, figuratively of course, was definitely with Bella, now and forever. No one, not even my family, had touched my life like she had. There was color now, color where there had only been black and white. Everything was on fire for me. And now, thanks to my recklessness, the only one that had ever meant this much to me, Bella, who meant everything to me, was in danger.
I growled at the thought of that bastard hunting my precious Bella. How dare he. He would pay for even thinking such thoughts. I tired to shake the anger off, or at least push it to the back of my mind…for now. Now, I would get to see my love. I would get to hold her, to tell her I will make it all better, to be with her. I was practically bouncing up and down in my chair at the prospect. It had been too long. An entire two days without Bella. The very thought was inconceivable!
As the plane skidded to a halt, I had to restrain myself from running off right then and there. Everyone took their time; Carlisle reached for our luggage, Esme gracefully rose from her seat, and Emmett stood up awkwardly. He was too bulky for such a cramped space. I would wait for them. It was because of them I had gotten here so fast after all. Oh come on! We're vampires for heaven's sake! We move at the speed of light practically, why were we still standing around when I could be with Bella right now?
"Go to her," whispered Esme.
That 'mother's' intuition can work miracles. Or maybe I my feelings were just that obvious. Whichever it was, I had permission to run off to Bella. I grinned, kissed Esme on the cheek, and I was off. It must have been the attitude I had, or just my usual repellence, but people were more than willing to move out of my way. I inhaled deeply when I was finally off of the plane. I ran, at a human pace, a fast human pace, to the end of the gate. Just seconds before I saw my angel. I could see Jasper, his hand on Alice's shoulder. Something was wrong. Jasper looked…ashamed. What would he have to be ashamed about? His thoughts hit me.
I shouldn't have let her go. Edward, I'm so sorry.
I looked at Alice's face, her thoughts betraying nothing. Her mind was blank. How was that possible? And then I noticed the vacant expression she displayed. No, not the face of a vision, this look was far more disturbing. Alice looked dead. And then she snapped out of it. She looked at me, and began crying tearless sobs. No. No. No. This wasn't happening. No. Alice was doing remarkably well hiding what she had seen from me. It was something horrible. Something she didn't want me to see at all. She was literally thinking nothing. I didn't realize it was possible.
"Alice. Where is she. What happened."
My questions sounded more like statements. Dull, lifeless statements.
"Gone."
Then her visions broke through. She must not have been able to hold it back any more. I saw everything. James, standing over his kill. Bella, lying on the floor, drained of her life. Bella, her eyes closed, her face frozen in a mask of fear. Bella, dead. No. No. My thoughts could form only that one word. People were beginning to move around me. I had fallen to my knees, my eyes were closed. No. No. No. No. I felt a hand on my shoulder. I felt someone in front of me, to the side, and I could vaguely feel a calm spreading throughout me. I pushed it away. I deserved no peace. I blocked out the thoughts around me, but it was more difficult to block out the sounds for some reason. I could see nor smell nothing. There was nothing for I had stopped breathing, at first in anticipation. How quickly that had turned to anguish. I wasn't listening to anything, but I could still faintly hear bits of the conversations going on around me.
"Alice? What do you see?"
"It hasn't happened yet! She's running…she's going to the ballet studio to meet James."
I snapped open my eyes. Bella was still alive. Still taking in her breaths. There was still a chance.
"Where is she? Where?"
I was on my feet now, scanning Alice's thoughts like a madman. In truth, I was a madman now. Without Bella, my life would be hell. My life was falling apart just knowing that death was closing in on her. I would do all that I could.
"Edward…she's too far away."
"She is NEVER too far away. Where is she Alice?"
Jasper glared at me for my tone. Of course he would protect Alice. He would protect his love until the end. Why shouldn't I be allowed to do the same?
"We're going to need a very fast car," replied Alice.
And in that one sentence alone, I knew there was hope, more than ever was there hope.
"Let's go."
I had confiscated someone's R-X8. Normally, I would feel just a little bit of guilt, but I had more pressing matters to consider. Alice was sitting by me in the passenger seat, and she was staring straight ahead, searching the future for a definite rescue. Jasper was in the back, his hand over Alice's shoulder, assuring her that he was still there, always there. Emmett had had to find his own ride, but he made out with a speeder himself as well. Carlisle rode with him. I stared out the front window, focused on saving Bella. Nothing else. No one else And then my thoughts drifted. Before I knew it, I was praying.
Please God, if you care about creatures like me, please, save her. If I cant make in time, save her for me. Or, if not for me, for Charlie. Or just for the sake of saving the innocent, please. Save her. I promise, I will never let anything like this happen to her again if she can just pull through. I will protect her with everything that I am. I promise just please, please, God, let her live.
I finished off. Never before had I ever done that. I hadn't bothered. Bella brought out everything forgotten in me. She had to be alright. I would not accept any other possibility. And then I saw the ballet studio come into sight. I slammed on the brakes and flew out of the car. I could smell the grass. The wind. James. But only one scent, the one scent that drove me wild in more ways than one, drove me further towards the building. It was a fresh scent, not even ten minutes old. It was Bella's scent. And then, I froze in my spot. My eyes widened in horror as I heard the most heartbreaking sound the world could possibly conjure. I heard Bella scream. It was a scream of agony, of pain, of misery. And then I heard her scream again.
"No. No, Edward, don't!"
Don't what? What didn't she want me to do? I ran forward. I was determined to find out. Bella herself was going to tell me, because she was going to live. I blocked out her further screams as best I could, though I roared with fury more than once. James was going to die.
And then I made it inside. The smell of blood pushed my control to the limit, although failing Bella was not an option. When I saw Bella, I broke apart inside. I was lost: physically, emotionally, mentally. All I could see, feel, and hear was Bella. Her drifting senses, her closed eyes, her pouring blood. Once again I screamed with fury. James will pay. He will die. Alice was behind me, holding her breath. Jasper was behind her, and then he turned right back around. I didn't blame him. The blood was everywhere. Emmett followed behind him, in slightly better control then Jasper. And then Carlisle, he was beside Bella, he was where I should have been. And as I pummeled into James, I knew I would be soon. Bella's whispering of my name tore me away from James. I threw him to Emmett. I knew he would get what he more than deserved.
I was with Bella now, holding her, rocking her back and forth.
"Oh no, Bella, no! Bella, please! Bella, listen to me, please, please, Bella, please!"
I called for Carlisle, even though he was right there with me. I called him for answers.
"Bella, Bella, no, oh please, no, no!"
I was sobbing, tearless vampire sobs. I felt Bella shudder, and then gasp for breath.
"Bella!"
Was there hope? Was Bella going to live? I remembered my prayer. Please, let her live. I would protect her. I would make sure nothing like this ever happened to my Bella ever again. And if she were ever put in any danger after this, I would leave. I would go, and never let this happen again. But she had to make it through this for that to happen. She had to pull through. Carlisle relayed to me the damage James had done. I growled once again, though I could hear him being dealt with. I could hear him dying. Then, I could hear Bella say my name. I could fly. She was awake. Thank you God.
"Bella, you're going to be fine. Can you hear me Bella? I love you."
Oh, how I loved this broken girl. I attempted to keep Bella conscious, we needed her awake so she could tell us what was wrong. And then, she frightened me. She screamed. She said her hand was burning.
"Bella?"
She continued to scream. And then Carlisle shattered my every dream.
"He bit her."
No! This isn't how I wanted Bella saved! She had so much life to live still, she didn't deserve to have it all taken away from her. Alice was back, and now she uttered words I had no desire to hear.
"Edward, you have to do it."
No. No! This cant be happening!
"No!"
"There may be a chance," whispered Carlisle.
What? What chance was there? There was no stopping this now, wasn't that the point? Wasn't that why we had our venom, because once it was used, there was no going back?
"What?" I begged.
Carlisle explained that the venom could possibly be sucked out. I didn't want to believe him. I didn't want that false sense of security. It had to be false. I was doomed to doom Bella. Carlisle said something then. And I knew it was all over. He said I had to do it. I had to suck the venom out. I had to bring Bella back. I had to drink the blood I longed for so much.
"I don't know if I can do that," I said, even though it was a complete understatement. I knew I couldn't do it.
Bella screamed more. More pain was infused with each of her heart-wrenching screams. When she screamed my name again she opened her eyes and looked into mine. I could see her fear. I could see her pain. Through it all though, my love for Bella, and my need to keep her as Bella, won out. Bella would live, and she would stay human. I would make sure of it.
"Edward, f you don't do it now, it will be too late."
He didn't even have to say it. I was already determined. My determination strengthened when I saw the tears in Bella's eyes. I would make it go away. I lifted her delicate bleeding hand to my lips…
I watched my damaged love sleep. She was in the process of healing, and she had so many chemicals coursing through her veins right now, she was passed out. I thought about my promise. My promise to leave if anything ever happened to her again. I was thinking about love, and how much of it Bella and I possessed. I was thinking about the dread, the horror, I felt when I thought I may have lost Bella. I never wanted that to be a possibility again. I should leave now, I should leave before death ever came this close to her again. I should leave to save her. And I would, if that's what would preserve her perfection, I would abandon her. Bella would hate me, but she would be alive, and that was all that mattered. I would never stop loving her, ever. As a matter of fact, my undying love for Bella is what may just keep her alive longer. If I left her, she would stand a chance. I had to go.
Bella's eyes fluttered open. My God she was so beautiful, even as she was reaching to pull apart the machines stabilizing her. Oh, how I loved her. More than life itself I loved this human girl. So fragile. When she said my name again, I conformed to myself. I would never leave her. I couldn't. I wasn't strong enough. But if I ever had to be, I was sure I could. I would do anything to protect her. If I ever did lose her, I would follow as close behind as I could. I wouldn't make her face anything ahead of her on her own. If there was light, I would be the best I could be to make sure I was right beside her to face the unknown. I would even follow her into the dark, as if darkness was even possible for her. Bella was too perfect for darkness. Nonetheless, if she were destined for the cold, I would be right there with her. I love her. Apart of me dragged the possibility of my leaving Bella from the darkest depths of my soul. Would I leave her if I had to? If that were to ever happen, I could break myself to repair her. I would do anything for her, including removing myself from her life. I wouldn't ever do that, but I could. If I had to. I love her. I love Bella. More than anyone could ever love another, I love Bella. When Bella discussed the idea of her moving to Florida with her mother, I was torn. Torn between my need to protect her, and my need to love her. Were they the same? Yes. I loved her so much I would stop at nothing to make sure she stayed alive to be loved. She was my life now. Hadn't I told her those exact words? She was my life now.
I made up my mind. I was determined. I would have to leave Bella. To go somewhere I couldn't hurt her anymore. But I cant. I cant. I cant. I have to. She means too much too me to see her in pain. She lay in front of me, nearly in pieces, and I was actually debating whether or not to let it happen again? Not only was I putting her in danger because of the world I belonged to, she was in danger every second she spent with me. There was always that small inkling of a possibility I could take her life away myself. That thought taunted me the most. That was what horrified me above all other deadly possibilities. The idea of me being the one to end it all for Bella. It was repulsive, unheard of. And yet, it was always there, holding me back from giving Bella my all. She deserved someone who could give her everything. Everything. I could never give her everything. Kissing her was a struggle for me, sadly, in more than one way. I would never be able to give her the life she deserved. She would never have a family if she stayed with me. I knew I had to go. I knew it, in the bottom of my long ago dead heart.
When I mentioned the very idea of Bella and I eternally being separated, she crumbled before my eyes. Her breathing became shallow, and the nurse came in, clearly concerned. How could I do this? In trying to save her from pain, I just put her through even more. But I knew it would have to be like that. Sure, Bella would hurt due to my departure, but she would recover right? She had to. I was counting on it. But I wouldn't put her through that misery. It wasn't fair to Bella. She had to have a say in what went on in her life, right? Wrong. I had to stop trying to change my mind. Bella was worth more than everything in the world, and to make sure she stayed just as she was, I would destroy everything we had worked so hard for. It was the best I could do for Bella. She would eventually understand. I knew she would. She was smart, logical. She had to understand. And before I knew it, I was promising to never leave her. What? How could I do that? I had just promised myself to do the very opposite! And yet, I here was, making impossible commitments. I could live with living with Bella, but I could not live with Bella not living life to the very fullest. Bella would live. And if I absolutely had to stay, I would make sure she did. I would keep her alive forever. She was my forever, I could be hers, I suppose. Everything in me fought against putting her in harms way, but at the same time, couldn't I protect her from everything either way? I was made for Bella. She was always in danger, maybe I was made to keep her away from it. I was made to keep her alive. So be it. I'll stay. Just for her. Just for my darling Bella. I was unconditionally and irrevocably hers. Always and forever would I stay. Even if she no longer loved me, I would still protect her. She was apart of me now. Unconditionally, irrevocably, always, and forever, I love Bella.
