"There's something wrong with you." She said suddenly as I nodded irately.
"Thanks." I answered sardonically as her mascaraed eyes grew wide.
"That's not what I meant." She murmured. "Edmund, you're not human." I could see her staring at my beauty. God, I just wanted to snarf her here and there.
"What are your theories?" I inquired wryly, smirking as if I didn't care about her. I just hoped she wouldn't mind when I snuck into her room tonight; if she was mad, that would be hard. I could be quite loud oiling her window and adding a couch in there every night. Granted, it wasn't a large couch….
"Um….maybe you're like, Batman? Or…um…CAPTAIN OBVIOUS…no…holy crow…" she whispered, intoxicating. She smelled sooo delicious. I stopped myself in mid-thought. This was not chivalrous of me. How could I?
"I hate you! Go die in a hole, Ella Lark!" I screeched as I hurried away to my rainbow Volvo.
I should have known she would have found me. My life is too depressing for her not to.
"Hey, sparklenotson!" Charlyle cried. "I'm working as a brain surgeon and it will have to do with the plot! Yay! Except there is no plot!" I simply ignored him and settled into my, picking out a selection of my most emo songs.
Hannah Montana filled the room as I sobbed silently, without any tears,
I left in disgust at myself. I loved her so much, why didn't she see? A look of chagrin spread across my face.
I entered a convenient forest, my color changing Gary-Stu eyes doing what they did best: turn colors with funny names. Of course, Ella happened to be there.
"I know what you are." She murmured.
"Say it." I replied in my most serious voice. "Say it out loud."
"Mermaid." She answered. I snarled and let my hunger take over in yet another bipolar moment. She died quickly, thank god. She was too clumsy for her own good.
I cracked open her gorgeous head, my bright, scintillating, iridescent arms reaching for food. Only to find nothing.
She had no brain.
That explained a lot.