Summary: A companion fic to You Were All I Needed ONE-SHOT Kuronue remembers. (I ran, just like he told me. I ran like the coward I was.)

All I Needed Was You

I watched. I watched my kitsune sit on his roof, thinking. He was so lost in thought that he never noticed my presence watching him. He never really did notice me there, always watching. Kurama could be pretty stupid sometimes; it was one of the endearing qualities that I liked about him. He was easy to trick if you knew him well enough.

On nights like these, though, where he sits upon the roof of the house he lives his ningen life in, I can't help my thoughts drifting towards the days where everything was just a game. I can't help but see, instead of the ningen he has become, my old partner, my mate, my love, mourning a loss that should never have happened.

I was foolish, going after the pendant. I was foolish, and it cost me much too dearly.

Sometimes I wish I had never mated the kitsune. Sometimes I wish I never loved him.

Then though I remember how much he meant to me, I remember every single encounter we had before he learned my name and I learned his. I remember the night we first met, and I remember the pain I inadvertently put him in.

I was foolish, oh so foolish, for the longest time.

…

I watched the kitsune, a breed I don't recognize from the limited studies my parents gave me before they were killed off by the bandits I now live with. I watched him stumble into the forest, through the rain. He shivered; most certainly he was cold. He'd die if he stayed out here, in this rain, I knew. I couldn't let him die; something of my instincts told me that if I had his death on my conscience I would wither away myself.

At one hundred and thirty-two years I followed the instincts I never learned about and approached the silver eared fox.

"Come with me," I said to him, and golden eyes turned sharply towards me. I reached a small hand, offering him to take it. The kitsune did, and I led him back to our group.

It was my birthday that day; I soon came to hate my birthday.

I was young then; I didn't look very old, and so I wasn't treated like they treated the kitsune. How was I to know that they would take advantage of his beauty? How was I to know that he was a rare breed, one of the last of his kind, and the bandits I was enslaved to considered him a delicacy?

I was two hundred and eighty-two years old when he asserted control. The bandits had grown to fear him—even I had grown to fear him. I watched him constantly through those hundred and fifty years. When the bandits hurt him I tended to his wounds. When he became emotionally lost, I was there to heal the mental pain. Since I watched him I had noted the changes in his demeanor that the others ignored at first.

By the tenth time they hurt him he started forming the mask of ice. He wrapped his heart so deeply in it that it became him over time. He didn't fear killing those who stood in his way after the fifth time the bandits forced him to kill this demon or that.

The bandits didn't notice that the innocent, rare, little fox they dearly loved to take advantage of had slowly become a cold and ruthless demon, one that would fight back.

Fight back he did. He killed the leader on the mark of the hundred and fiftieth day I brought him to our group. I had witnessed it; it shook me to the bone. I feared that he would let them do to me what the leader attempted to him, but he didn't.

The bandits no longer mocked him on his use of the flora life. They feared him for it instead. He became the leader of our group and things changed. Anyone who hurt the younger were killed, anyone who disrespected him was killed. He didn't care any longer, and it pained me slightly that his innocence was completely shattered inadvertently by my hand.

I never really forgave myself for that; for shredding what was left of his innocence.

After fifty years had passed he killed the group; not me though, for some reason he spared the three hundred and thirty-two year old kumori that brought him to this darkness of life. He had scared me though.

"Run far away, kumori-gaki, and stay away," the eight-hundred year old fox snarled at me. "If I ever see you again, I will kill you."

I ran, just like he told me. I ran like the coward I was.

…

Kurama always had that effect when I was younger. He was Alpha then, and I was just a mere kid. Insignificant. I grew stronger for him after that day. My instincts wouldn't lie to rest the cowardice I had shown in front of the kitsune I tried to save and instead destroyed.

Running away led to one good thing, I suppose. I was able to find a kumori colony, and was integrated into their ranks shortly after. They took care of me like their own. They trained me and taught me about the kumori instincts—it differed with each breed of kumori, however.

It was there I learned that I was the last of my own breed of kumori, just as Kurama was one of the last of his breed of kitsune.

I suppose it was fate that we ended up together, me being the last shadow kumori, he being the last silver spirit kitsune.

Life had gone on, however, and for a while I lived with the kumori colony, but eventually I left. They weren't like me; they weren't as jaded as I had become, though I was not as jaded as Kurama had become from my actions; they weren't of my breed, and so they didn't fully understand me, wouldn't have even if I hadn't grown the way I did.

Twenty-five years after the 'disbanding' of the bandit group I left the kumori colony and started out on my own, searching for the fox that my heart cried out to. I didn't find him for another twenty-five years, and when we did meet again it was, strangely enough, my birthday.

Ironic…I find it oh so ironic that when I see him once more, it was on my birthday, the same day when I damned him two hundred and fifty years prior.

…

My eyesight and sense of smell wasn't always the best, as true with every kumori. My hearing was much better, however, and I preferred it that way. No one could really sneak up on me with my hearing, and even now I could hear the faintest sounds as I sat, resting, reminiscing. It was my birthday, the day I met that fox; the day I damned him. He was hard to track down, a good thing I suppose, keeps him safe from the bounty hunters.

Rumor spread that he was targeting people in this forest; rich demon lords and the like. I figured it wasn't a waste to check out the rumor, and with that in mind I had headed towards the forest. It had been several days and no sign of the fox. I was going to leave after today if he didn't show here and instead look out for other rumors or possible places he might haunt.

That was when I heard it; the cry, scream to be more accurate, and the sound of a whip.

He was here, in the forest. The thought made me smile and I stood, stalking silently through the trees, pushing the green flora out of my way. A good thing with hearing like mine is that I can become near silent. If I can't hear my own footsteps, then how can a fox?

I stopped just outside the clearing and smiled ever so slightly. Even at this distance, though my eyesight may not compare to other demons, I could make out little details. He was different, that was for sure. His outfit had changed a bit from fifty years ago, but I brushed it aside. He was bound to have changed after all.

He looked older now. Back when I first met him he appeared the human age of ten or twelve, thirteen at the oldest. Now however—the passing of those two hundred and fifty years—had brought the vision before me older. Human wise I suppose he'd be fourteen or fifteen, and depending on the breed of kitsune, he could stay in this appearance for a good few hundred years.

I watched him silently as he bent to grab whatever it was he had killed the man for. He paused, hand hovering, and his ears twitching.

My eyes widened and I knew then that he knew I was there.

After a second of staying perfectly still, attempting to clothe my scent and signature, the fox smirked.

I barely stopped myself from letting out a yelp of surprise as vines sprouted around me. They moved to wrap tightly about me, and they almost caught me. Years training however just barely saved my life. I was able to dice the vines quickly, one did knick my wing. It would take a few days for that to heal—since our wings are so sensitive they take longer to be knit together again.

The fox whirled around just as I moved; I figured he would've discovered his trap didn't work anyway. Daringly I got up into the silver's face and pulled my fist back. Putting all the strength I could muster I punched the fox on the nose. He reeled back, shocked. I wasted no time in grabbing any valuables that the fox was after, as well as snatching a few off of the fox's person.

It would ensure that he'd follow me, and help me determine whether he would follow through with his threat fifty years ago.

I stopped short, the sound of the fox having disappeared, which shouldn't have been possible to my ears. He could be using the flora to muffle his footsteps but that was unlikely that he knew so much about my kind. Shrugging it off I decided to look over what the fox had and what he wanted.

That proved to be mistake number one.

Mistake number two was that he hit my wing.

Damn it now it would take a week minimum to heal! I would never hear the end of it if I was still with the colony!

Not letting the fox get another chance to attack I lashed out with my scythes, tearing apart his whip. He just reformed it seconds later and with narrowed eyes I attacked and defended.

It ended with a draw, the kitsune having slowly become distracted, curious about me I suppose, while I myself had begun to tire. I leapt back, away from the silver eared teen, and pulled my scythes back to my person. The fox stilled as well, watching me silently, trying to predict an attack.

I just grinned at him and said, "Until we meet again…friend," before darting off into the woods.

He never noticed that I snatched the pendant and his wallet when I pulled my scythes back.

Nearly a mile away I collapsed outside a cave, letting the pain I had pushed aside come back, and come back it did; twofold in fact.

I would be out of any sort of activity for two weeks.

"Damn kitsune," I cursed under my breath and pulled myself into the cave, wincing at the pain from my damaged wing.

I'd get him back for this somehow; see how he would like it if a sensitive piece of his body was damaged. Maybe I should introduce his tail to a few papercuts?

The idea was appealing.

…

I winced; my wing throbbed slightly in reminder of my lack of attention back then. It wasn't the first, and most certainly not the last, that my wings got nicked or sliced. Though at a later date, when I finally joined up with Kurama, he usually tended to those wounds. He actually made a salve to help the healing go along. The salve stung like a thousand needles; Kurama said he couldn't take the pain away, but I swear the bastard just did it out of vindictive pleasure. Not that I really minded; I took it all as repayment for the hell I put him through.

I didn't tell him that, however. I'd rather he think me a masochist than a remorseful kumori for both saving and damning his life.

If he knew how much I pained from my decision he'd whack me across the head and then beat me into the ground. Kurama always had this strange issue with me and my regrets. He didn't like it, and let me know that every chance he caught me in that mood.

I had gotten more bruises from him trying to knock sense into me than I got from my years with the bandits—which was saying something, honestly. I got bruised a lot with them, but at least Kurama tried to make sure I didn't bleed, just bruise.

Still, the day we grouped together…or, more accurately, the situation that brought us together as partners, only reminded me how much I had screwed up the fox's life. I still don't really know why he attacked so ferociously, he never told me, and I never pressed for answers.

It was fifteen years after I found him again, once more on my birthday.

I really began to hate my birthday by that time.

…

I had stalked him as he went through his heist; well, it was more like I was silently helping him instead of just stalking. I killed this or that guard when they came too close to my kitsune and he unfortunately didn't notice.

When he came out, and a little ways away from the 'scene of the crime' so to speak, did I appear before him.

The attack was immediate. No warning, no idea as to why he began to attack so suddenly. I hadn't even taken something off of his person yet and he already was lashing his whip at me. The grass became razors forcing me to the air lest I wanted my feet to be sliced. The trees began to move, bending towards me, the branches reaching out to trap me. I only had a chance to defend, no chance of attack, and the fox's attack was relentless.

I had to slice away tree branches, dodged leaves that suddenly became miniature blades of death, all the while cutting back his whip. He didn't just use his whip, however. Soon he discarded it, forming a rose, and scattering the petals. The petals became like the leaves, miniature blades of death, painful and definitely not something to be caught with.

When the petals and leaves didn't appear to work he pulled out other plants of his arsenal.

It was when he was reading his next attack, pulling yet another seed from his hair, that I finally got my chance to go off the defensive and onto the offensive.

The kitsune didn't know what hit him as I attacked back relentlessly. I wanted answers. I wanted to know why he suddenly was aiming for the kill, and the only way I'd get to know that was if I knocked him down; if I beat him near death. I could always use my meager healing abilities to bring him from the brink of death later anyway. He could heal on his own afterwards I'm sure.

I had cornered him after a while, and though I was breathing heavily I didn't stop. I was determined to get my answers; I was determined to know why he suddenly wanted to kill me.

Unwillingly I remembered back to his words the day he killed the bandit group.

"If I ever see you again, I will kill you."

The words had haunted me, and it made me wonder; did he not know I was the same kumori child as the one he threatened during these past fifteen years? Did he only just figure it out? Or was he toying with me entirely?

I wanted my answers and so I didn't stop my attack. Even though they say not to corner a wild animal, a true saying for even demons, I still did so, and I still fought.

He hit my arm in the end, but I ignored it in favor of digging my scythe just below his shoulder.

I began my questions, even as the kitsune groaned in pain. I wanted my answers, and I'd get them.

"Tell me why you try to do this now! Why now?" I was breathing heavily, but ploughed on. "Why? Don't you care? I saved your ass! You would have died that nigh—" and then I stopped, frozen. What if he still didn't know I was the kumori child from back then? What if he still held his threat as truth?

Even wounded I know he could kill me; I saw him forcing the pain away for numbness as he began to growl angrily.

"What did you say?" his voice was low and threatening. I was shaking; his threat still remained true, I'm sure now. "Are you the boy that took me to those bastard wannabe bandits?"

I stuttered, afraid, and the fox continued on, eyes narrowed in anger.

"Listen, child, I don't care." The words startled me; he didn't care? "If anything I learned this world is cold, cruel, and evil," a truth which I had inadvertently shown him and self-loathing welled inside me. "I don't care if you live or die," I flinched; my instincts took a blow for that one. They brought me to this fox, and this fox may have just very well condemned me with that statement. He didn't know, however, and so I was safe until he knew.

His pain seemed to come back, the anger and adrenaline fading. Painfully he got out, "I…don't…care…" before he began to slip away, one hand grasping his shoulder tightly. His eyes shuddered closed, the last thing I saw in them was pain—so much pain—and I was the cause behind it.

With a whispered, "I do," as the fox finally slipped into darkness, I began to bring him back to the place I was staying in currently to heal.

He may not care whether I lived or die. He may not care about me at all; however, I care for him. I care if he lives or dies, and he won't—not on my watch.

I set about to getting him healed.

…

Kurama didn't care back then, or so he said. He tried to kill me for a reason, this I knew, and maybe it was because he didn't care. Maybe it was because he grew tired of my childish acts, or maybe; maybe it was because he cared too much. Maybe it was because he didn't want to have anyone close, ever again.

I guessed it was the latter, considering how he acted three days later when he awoke in the rundown shack I had taken residence for the time being.

…

He had awoken after three days of slow healing. I hoped it would be shorter, I expected shorter, but I guess I grossly overestimated my meager healing abilities. I remained quiet after the initial surprise and relief of him awakening. The words exchanged were merely that of to his wound and the length of time he faced darkness. I was content to sit silently and not speak, though I wished to see his golden orbs up close, a sight I hadn't had the chance to see for a while now.

As if on command after the pause of silence the fox opened his eyes, flicking his golden orbs in my direction. They were much deeper than just gold when you looked at them closely. In fact they more represented leaves in the fall, a crinkled mess, mixture of gold and browns all swirled together in a chaotic state.

"What do you want from me, child?" the kitsune asked.

I couldn't look him in the face. I couldn't say what my instincts screamed at me to say, but I settled on the closest thing, still not looking at his face, knowing my own would give away what I wanted to keep hidden for now.

"I…" I hesitated for a second, wondering which would be closest to the truth without outright lying. Finally I settled on, "just want a home," softly, eyes downcast.

The fox stilled slightly before speaking his thoughts aloud.

"You could stay with me…" That shocked me. I never figured he'd want me anywhere near him considering what I had done. "You would though have to train hard in the art of thievery." An art I was talented in but could use more training for I knew. "Maybe one day I'll become famous, with you, if you take up my offer."

The last bit left me so off kilter I couldn't respond. Wide eyed and open mouthed I attempted to word what I wanted twice before the shock settled aside for happiness and I thanked him joyously.

We talked a bit more, him mentioning he healed faster. I did not know that fact—I still was in the dark mostly about his breed of kitsune. We briefly touched upon what I needed to work on, but I could tell almost instantly that I might just have a chance.

I might just have a chance to be accepted; to live.

…

We worked together for fifty years. The first ten were dedicated to getting me up to scratch with him, the next ten on building our name. By the thirtieth year as partners we had become famous, the fortieth we didn't have to steal any more just to live, but we still did anyway. We did it for the thrill, the adrenaline rush. We were invincible.

The mark of the fiftieth year came my birthday; my four hundred and forty-seventh. I had been watching my fox those fifty years and was pleased to note that he had been growing affectionate of me.

He never acted upon those affections however, and my own instincts wouldn't let it rest any longer.

I decided that if he wasn't going to tell me himself, I'd wheedle it out of him the only way I knew would work.

So I kissed him. I kissed him, shocked him, and then began to play with him.

His neck was a sensitive area I had discovered after a few seconds. It threw him out of his shock enough to realize what I was trying to say, and he didn't force me away.

This was good.

He wanted more, oh I could tell he wanted more, he couldn't really hide much from me these days anyway, but I didn't give him anything other than the teasing, light touches I started with.

I wanted to be devious. I wanted him to know that he was mine, to know the name of the one who claimed him, and so with that in mind I spoke softly, breath tickling his fox ear, a small smirk on my lips.

"My name's Kuronue," I told him softly, my voice a bit deeper than normal I knew. "Say my name and you'll get more…" I added in barely a whisper, my hands moving in teasing touches, my mouth never stayed long enough to cause but fleeting pleasure.

The fox let out a moan of anger; he didn't like my game right now, but he didn't retaliate. He did attack back. His mind must've been too befuddled to fully think that he could subdue me. The thought probably hadn't passed his mind.

Still I teased further, chuckling softly, "Go ahead."

He didn't respond, instead gritting his teeth. Oh so now he wished to play the strong one? I don't think so.

Parting his robe and trailing my hand down I whispered seductively, "Come on, I know you want to," to him, smirking.

He lost it, head slightly tilted as he growled out, yelling, annoyed, "Inari damn it! Just get on with it you fucking kid!" He didn't even say my name, he just called me kid.

"After you say my name," I said, smirking wickedly as I nibbled the corner of his ear. We'll see who's the kid now, won't we?

He didn't respond and so with a husky, "Come on," and slowing my hand's decent to a stop just above his pants while biting his neck with a sharp nip he finally released what I wanted him to say.

He moaned out my name, though I don't know if he realized it fully, however I said I would give him more if he said my name. The moan that sounded like it worked for me, and so I continued. This time however my touches were the light, teasing, nips and ghosting of fingers. They were more passionate, lasted longer.

He couldn't hold in his groans or growls of pleasure, and I didn't mind giving it to him. He was mine now, always mine.

After a minute he let out a breathy, "Yoko Kurama," and I pulled back, confused.

"My name," the fox said, breathing heavily. "It's Yoko Kurama."

I knew his name finally, and I knew then that the deal was sealed. He may not have noticed it yet, but he was mine from that moment forth, and would always be mine.

The rest of the night was heavenly, I wouldn't forget for the world. It was when I made him mine, and he made me his.

I still wasn't free, unfortunately. I still couldn't live.

So it wasn't any real surprise to me when eighty-five years later a heist went wrong.

My pendant was cut from my grasp; the very essence of my life was flung from me, and in turn I died for it.

I left him alone, and for that I can never forgive myself.

…

The heist was well from the start, too well actually. I was expecting something to go wrong at how easy it passed by, and something did go wrong.

The chain of my pendant snapped. It flew away from me, out of my reach even as I tried to grasp it. I halted immediately and turned around, running back towards the very thing that kept me from freedom.

"Kuronue!" I heard Kurama yell. "Leave it!"

I didn't even glanced back as I replied, "I need it!"

He didn't know about the pendant. He didn't know why it was precious and dear, and he wouldn't ever know. I would never get the chance to tell him.

I didn't see the trip wire so I didn't notice the trap. All I could focus on was my pendant, and so I never noticed the danger until it was too late.

The shoots of bamboo speared me. It began to rain blood around me—oh so much blood.

Kurama had whirled around and started back towards me, frightened and worried, with a cry of, "Kuronue no!"

I suppose I had let out a yell of pain and surprise that alerted the fox first and foremost that I was hurt. The stench of blood, my blood, was probably strong in the air by now as well.

Wide-eyed the silver eared kitsuned made to save me; I couldn't have that. I couldn't have him save me and die himself, so I yelled out to him.

"Forget about me, save yourself, Kurama!"

Kurama shook his head and let out a "No!" but I repeated myself. I told him to run. The guards were coming, I'm sure even Kurama's ears could hear their footfalls now.

He stared at me a moment longer in horror, and with a final yell of my name, pained and sad, he raced away.

I stared after him, my own eyes tearing. He left, as I wanted, and he would live while I would be here, captured, and most likely die a caged man.

My hand painfully tightened around the pendant as I mentally cursed its being.

I would die a caged man, I was sure of it.

…

I was captured and I was tortured. The memories still haunt me to this day. I was only able to escape when I heard hunters where after my fox, but by then it was too late. He was already dead, long dead.

I fled. I left the Makai and hid myself in Ningenkai. It was all I could do. I had to stay here, a caged man; always a caged man.

It was surprisingly enough a night like this when I discovered Kurama lived as a ningen now. I was going to intervene when he had stolen the Forlorn Hope; I didn't want to lose him again, but the detective saved him for me, and so I remained in the shadows, watching after my fox.

When he was forced into the Dark Tournament I feared for his life. He was ningen now; he didn't have the complete strength of his time as Yoko Kurama, the masterful thief. He had what little tendrils of energy he could grasp in the ningen body. So I followed and hid in the crowd, watching as he fought, lost as how to help him, if I should help him.

He won though, and they claimed their prize, any wish granted. They brought back the detectives old teacher, and that same day I pendant cracked and then crumbled.

Somehow I was free from that day onwards. Somehow I stopped being a caged man and became the free man I was now.

I still didn't ever intervene in Kurama's ningen life. I couldn't; not when he thought I was dead and gone. I was being a coward again, I knew. I didn't have the strength to face him, not for a long while.

So I sat here and watched. I watched him stare at the sky silently. I watched as he pulled a seed from his hair and bloomed a rose, lifting it to the sky.

"As a token to my undying love for you," he whispered sadly. "May you rest well."

My heart clenched as he let the rose fall into the wind. Strangely enough it defied he acts of gravity and instead floated away.

I couldn't take hiding any longer. I leapt across the roof silently and knelt behind my fox. I wrapped my arms around his waist and set my chin on his shoulder, pulling him into an embrace I had wanted to give for so long.

I said softly, "I have rested well, and forever will by knowing you live," in my now red haired fox's ear.

He turned in my grasp, shocked, and stared at me. I stared back, somewhat amused and somewhat sorrowful, amusement won out in the end and I said softly, "Hello, love."

My fox, my Kurama, smiled at me and whispered, "Even if you are a dream, love, I'll never forget you."

He closed his eyes contentedly, and I held him securely. We stayed like that until dawn, and I knew then that I would never leave my fox alone, ever. Never again.

…

The companion one-shot to You Were All I Needed only in Kuronue's perspective. There is a sequel these two one-shots called Candy At Midnight. This sequel may or may not turn out to be a chaptered fic, it depends on how it goes.

Thank you for reading, and reviewing.

MB
Midnight Bloodlust