Lying in bed trying to fall asleep, I hadn't slept in weeks, while watching a spider webbing his way down from the ceiling I hear a quiet boom, I thought it was quiet at least but my insomnia was playing games with my senses, what sounded quiet shook the room enough to nock the little spider from his web sending him my way. I rolled off the bed barely dodging my spindly legged little friend, for some reason I was instantly interested in what kind of spider it was so I moved in to look at it. "Brown recluse, good thing I dodged it" quickly it jumped at me, before I could react to its jump a gloved hand caught it, I followed the black glove to a red sleeve which lead to a red coat, when I followed that up it lead to a pair of orange sunglasses that attached to the mans head by a zigzag… go around the head thing. And spiky blonde hair, when I saw his face my eyes darted back and forth between his face and my computer, the background image being a picture of Vash the stampede from Trigun. My eyes darted back and forth several times while he walked to the window and put the spider on the outside wall of the house. I stammered "Vash… Vash…Vash…the…st…st…stamp…VASH THE STAMPEDE!!!" He looked at me vacantly for a few seconds before saying "yup… but was it nessesary to yell?" "Yes it's necessary to yell, you're not supposed to exist!!!" he looked confused and said "I'm not? Maybe I'm not real… you could be dreaming." Vash told me I couldn't stop looking at the gun at his waist, I knew it at a glance, the revolver. "You there kid?" he asked tapping me on the head. "Yeah! I was just admiring your gun." I said quickly "You really like yelling don't you kid?" Vash asked "Sometimes, but why are you here?" "some guy waved at me and BOOM I was here" Vash said to me before looking up deep in thought…" where are we?" he asked "Indiana" I told him "something bigger" he requested "America" I told him "… bigger" he requested again "Earth!!" I snapped at him "Oh… where's that?
I couldn't believe it, one Vash the stampede was in my room, two Vash rock, three, he has no idea where we are, not even the planet. "Never mind" I said "if you don't know where earth is I can't explain it any broader then that" Vash rubs his head "getting here was not easy on my skull, if only I could remember why I'm here, I'm sure there's a reason then I might be able to get my bearings here" with that he lied down on the floor "it's late I can figure it out tomorrow, mind if I sleep in here?" "sure, go ahead it's not every day an anime character shows up" but before I could finish saying that he was asleep and snoring like something I didn't want to know what was.
When I woke up he was already awake, and sitting in my chair, it was tiny and blue, shaped kind of like a racing seat but padded much better. "Good morning" he said waving to me with one finger as he reads the back of a Trigun DVD "you found that huh?" I asked him "yup" he said "how is it that they've got so much of my life?" he asked. "Well, you're a cartoon character around here" "just because I act a little weird you think I'm a cartoon character?" Vash said "No, I think you're a cartoon character because you're a character in a cartoon" with that I opened the DVD case he was looking at and put it in the player after clicking a few buttons an episode started up which Vash seemed a bit too in to considering he'd lived it all already. While watching there was a heavy nock at the door. We both went down to check on it and when we did two men dressed like country club golfers, wearing khakis and polo shirts, a slightly heavy man wearing a blue and white shirt, the other a man of muscular build but who was very short wearing a green and blue shirt. Both Vash and I stared awkwardly at them for a few seconds before the muscular man pulled a silenced berretta from a holster at his back and aimed it at us, for a second I panicked but before he even had a chance to pull the trigger a loud bang rang out about two inches from my ear, when I looked at what it was I saw Vashe's gun, the smell of gunpowder stinging my nostrils but at the same time exciting me I hopped over a small divider between the entrance and the living room and quickly ran at breakneck speeds to the trophy room, I don't know why I called it the trophy room, all that was there was a certificate saying I won an accuracy contest, a gun rack, and a pair of decorative colt peacemakers I won with the certificate, the guns came with rounds and I was told that they still work, so I grabbed the guns and the holsters they came with and tossing them on the couch, next I grabbed my .44 magnum, before I could get all my weapons together the fat man kicked the door in, quickly I put my hands up "Get on your knees!" he yelled at me and I slowly did, once I was on one knee, quickly I grabbed the .32 snub nose I had at my ankle and shot the guy right in the mouth, killing him instantly.
"Who were those guys?" Vash asked "I was hoping you could tell me" I responded dragging their bodies out of the way. "well whoever the were, they weren't too bad if the fat guy could get passed you" "oh, it wasn't a problem, I let him past and kept my gun on him the whole time, I just wanted to know if you could take him" Vash said "well as I'm sure you could tell, I can" I told him. "I never got your name did I kid?" I put on my gun belt equipped with my .44 and my colt peachmakers and put a collection of knives in my coat and my snub nose at my ankle as I say "you can call me Des Payn" he offered me his had saying "looks like we'll be having some problems around here Des.