I wanted it so I did it.

I refused to use a Katy Perry song lyric for the title, so Pitbull/Ke$ha it is.

"You all alone, Odango Atama?" The voice from behind her made Usagi roll her eyes.

"Oh, jeeze, you? Really?"

Sure enough, Mamoru was sliding into the seat next to her, as if they were at Motoki's, and not a glittering casino bar in Las Vegas, half a world away from home.

"Oooh, ya know," she said, spinning crookedly on the bar stool, pointing a finger right in his chest, "when you said you were gonna be in Veags the same time Minako and I were, I didn't realize you meant at the same bar in the same casino, bugging me."

"Where is Minako?" Mamoru asked, eyes flitting out into the crowd for a moment.

"Minako's at a fashion shoot," Usagi said, finishing the last of her drink and signaling for another one. "Don't worry, she's just in the Bell- Uh.. bello-"

"Bellagio?"

"Yeah, that sounds right."

"And she just left you here?" Mamoru looked annoyed.

"So?"

"I better hang around then," he said, pulling a menu toward him. "So I can watch out for you."

Usagi felt a rush of anger. "Hey, jerk," she said. "I can't take care of myself!"

"Hmm," he said, looking unconvinced. "I better stick with you, just in case." He ordered an iced tea from the bartender, handing his over his credit card. "After all, it's Vegas. Anything can happen here."

The next morning

Mamoru woke up feeling like his head was being dismantled, and like his mouth was stuffed with cotton. "Ugh," he moaned, opening his eyes slowly. The room was incredibly bright, and he was lying on the floor, with his head on a pillow.

He sat up carefully, realized he'd fallen asleep fully dressed, hadn't changed out of his suit last night. Or, apparently, brushed his teeth. He made a face and put his hands to his head. Okay, I'm hungover, he thought. That much is obvious. Do I remember anything about last night?

Running into Usagi at the bar... and then, something... a cab ride? Mamoru pulled back his hands and frowned at the ring on his left hand. "That's new," he murmured.

There was a rustle from the bed and feminine groan. Oh shit...I'm not alone?

He about blacked out when Usagi sat up blearily and rubbed her eyes. It was a moment before his brain jump started, working overtime through the hangover fog. Don't panic. You slept on the floor. You are both still fully clothed. Nothing could have happened.

"What time is it?" she mumbled. "Also, where am I?"

"Las Vegas," Mamoru answered, in a dry voice. Usagi looked over at him, still blinking in confusion. "More specifically, my room," he continued.

"Why?"

"I don't know," he said, scrubbing his hands over his face. Something was coming back to him... an elevator?

"You need to press the button for your floor."... A giggle. "I don't 'member it."

"I think you didn't remember your room number," Mamoru said, "That must be it. So I brought you here to sleep."

"But, Mamoru?"

"Yeah?"

"Why am I wearing a ring?"

For a moment they just looked at each other. "I ... I don't...know," Mamoru said.

He stood up, started looking around the room, ignoring the pounding in his head. When he moved, something crinkled in his pocket. He pulled out a slip of paper. "$120 receipt to the Lucky Seven Wedding Chapel", he read out loud. "Including ceremony, rings and... souvenir photograph."

"Huh?" Usagi didn't understand the English he'd just read. "What is it?"

Mamoru was quiet for a long time, before he looked up at her and raised his eyebrows. "I think... we may have gotten married last night."

"What?!"

His mind in overtime, Mamoru started to pace around the room, muttering to himself. "Okay, okay, I can fix this. We'll just go there - there is no way they've filed the paperwork yet. This can't be legal! We aren't even citizens. And we must have been obviously intoxicated... I'm sure there is a way..."

"My head hurts," Usagi whined, falling back down into bed. Her dress was uncomfortable, it was not made to be slept in. Although the fact she was fully clothed definitely meant it was likely nothing else had happened between them at least. Forgetting her impulse wedding was enough, she would have hated not to remember consummating it.

"Usagi, jesus, can you focus on the problem at hand here?"

"Excuse me," Usagi snapped, "but what exactly did you want me to do? I'm really hungover."

"Join the club," he shot back.

I can't believe this happened. I was supposed to watch out for her. He felt like drowning in guilt.Then again, wasn't it better she drunkenly married me and not some random stranger? Who knows what might have happened. The idea of a drunk, giggling Usagi marrying anyone else made him cringe in anger for some reason. She's so fucking reckless.

"Uh, I can't believe you did this," he muttered, riding the rush of anger. "I knew you were a disaster when you were drunk but..."

"Me?!" The pitch of her voice sent Mamoru's headache into triple time. "What makes you so sure this was my idea?"

He turned and gave her a look. "Please, this has Tsukino Usagi written ALL over it," he said.

"Uh, pretty sure it's Chiba Usagi now," she deadpanned and he blanched a little. "Do you have any aspirin?"

Last night

Their drinks appeared on the bar in front of them, and Usagi reached for hers. "It's pink," she told Mamoru, with a giggle, "Pretty, right?"

"Yeah, Odango atama," he said, shaking his head. "Very pretty." He took a long sip of his tea.

"You don't need to babysit me, ya know. Unless you actually want to spend time with me," she grinned around her straw, feeling warm all of a sudden. Maybe the alcohol wasn't a good idea, if she forgot to hide her attraction to him. Then again, flirting didn't seem so difficult now. She wasn't even nervous to touch his arm, to cross her legs- making her skirt fall a bit higher up her thigh.

"I want to make sure you survive the night," Mamoru said, forcing his eyes off her legs and onto his drink. "A beautiful girl all alone in a city like this..." Strange, that was usually something he thought, rather than said out loud.

"Beautiful, huh?" Usagi giggled again, leaning against him for a moment. "I'm so flattered."

Mamoru felt flustered, like his mouth wasn't doing what he wanted it to. "Oh, you know you're gorgeous," he rolled his yes "and-,"

"And?"

He finished his tea and the bartender handed him another one. "I can't think of the right word," Mamoru said, eyebrows knitting. The words his brain was supplying though the haze in his brain weren't helpful. Intoxicating, precocious, addicting. "Vexing," he finally said. "Aggravating." He finished his drink quickly, trying to ignore Usagi giggling every so often, looking at him from the side of her eyes.

"C'mon," he said, when he noticed she'd finished her latest drink, "maybe it's time to- g-go," he stood from the bar stool and stumbled a bit. The room was swimming slightly. He offered Usagi his hand, and she took it sliding down from her seat with a bit of a sway. Her cheeks were pink.

"I think my drinks were alcoholic after all," Mamoru said, squinting at the menu. Long Island Iced Teas are alcoholic? They should tell you that.

Usagi shrugged, "I just pointed at the pictures. I can't read English."

"See?" he said, sliding his arm around her waist, "this is why you need my assistance." He felt like maybe he was emphasizing the wrong syllables.

He tried to guide her to the elevators. Usagi, still laughing, wrapped both her arms around his waist and pulled. Mamoru almost fell over, "Wh-"

"I'm - not going back to my room," she said, shaking her head wildly. "C'mon, c'mon, PUH-lease can we just... go somewhere? Do something? It's Vegas!"

Mamoru sighed and shut his eyes for a second. When he opened them, she was looking up at him with a dazzling smile. "C'mon, Chiba," she took his hand, "Let's have some fun."

"Five minutes," he said.

The Next Morning

Minako was waiting for them outside her and Usagi's hotel room, arms crossed. "Well, if it isn't Mr. and Mrs. Drunken Idiot," she said, shooting daggers at Mamoru with her eyes.

Mamoru gave Usagi a look, and she shrugged sheepishly. "I called her when you were in the bathroom," she said. "She was worried!"

"How is that 'not telling anybody'?"

"It's just Minako!"

"Yeah, plus I already let everyone back home know, too," Minako said. Mamoru just groaned and put his head in his hands.

"Way to watch out for her, Chiba," Minako said, voice dripping with sarcasm. "So glad you were there to protect her from doing anything stupid. OH WAIT."

Mamoru cringed, and lowered his head.

"I'm going to fix this, okay?" he said. "She's here to shower and change and then we are running right to the wedding chapel to... undo this."

Rolling her eyes, Minako pushed him out the door and closed it. Then she turned and faced Usagi.

"Not now, Minako," Usagi said, running to the safety of the bathroom and turning on the water full blast. Her head was feeling a bit better, a bit clearer, but the events of the past night were still a blur.

Last Night

"I've never seen you drunk before," Usagi said. He'd finally got her on the elevator after losing twice at roulette and watching her win $50 and then lose close to $100 on the slots. Whenever the complimentary drinks came around, Usagi would press a glass into his hand, and he didn't bother to turn them down. In for a dime, in for a dollar.

"I'm not as- bad as you," he said, the hiccup in the middle of sentence probably not helping his point but.

Still, he was having trouble forming thoughts. It didn't help Usagi was pressed against him, as he leaned on the elevator wall for support. He put his hands on her waist, let her slide her body even closer. "Thanks for... taking care of me," she said, with a crooked smile.

"I- yeah," he said, swallowing hard. Get her back to her room, his brain screamed at him. You are both drunk and you are not allowed to do anything further, do you understand?

"What?" She put her chin on her chest, looked up at him. Mamoru forced his gaze to the buttons on the side of the elevator. "You need to press... your floor," he mumbled.

Usagi giggled, tightened her grip on him. "I don't 'member it."

He fumbled for her purse, "Didya write it down?"

She leaned over and pressed a bunch of buttons. "There! It's prolly one of those I think." The doors closed and Usagi leaned back into his arms, looking up at him.

The next morning

The conversation at the chapel was going over Usagi's head, quite literally actually. Especially since she didn't speak the language at all.

The man Mamoru was talking to said something in English and handed Usagi a folded piece of white card-stock, decorated with gold bells and a dove. She thanked him and opened it.

"That's our photo," Mamoru said, cringing. Usagi pulled out the photograph.

"Wow, it really happened," she murmured, looking at her red-faced smile. She was clinging to Mamoru's arm and raising her hand in a happy cheer. Mamoru was just as red, if not worse, than she was. And he was grinning like she'd never seen before. Usagi bit her lip, looking up at him as he spoke to the officiant above her head.

Maybe it was my idea, I don't remember, but he agreed to it. Enthusiastically, from the looks of the photo.

"Okay," Mamoru said, turning to her. "Turns out, we can just sign a form negating the... um, marriage. They file it together, and it's like it never happened." He handed her a pen, and pointed to a line on the paper.

Usagi paused for a second, frowning. "Ask him how long we have," she said.

"What?"

"Just do it."

Some more foreign words were exchanged. "Until the end of the day, county clerk closes at six," Mamoru said. "But, Usagi, we are here now and-"

"I'm not signing yet," she put the pen down and turned to Mamoru, arms crossed. "You wanted to marry me," she said. "You agreed to it."

"I was drunk!"

"I don't care. You still did it. And you need to live with the consequences," she said. "Until six."

"Usagi-" he said and she smiled, showing all her teeth.

"Don't you mean, 'my darling wife'?"

Mamoru opened and closed his mouth a few times, unsure of what to say or do. Usagi wound her arm around his waist, and smiled up at him. "I'll call you... my darling husband. Or... no... maybe... Mamo-chan." She grinned. "Ooh I like that. C'mon, Mamo-chan, I'm hungry. Let's get go to a buffet."

Last Night

Usagi leaned over and pressed a bunch of buttons. "There! It's prolly one of those I think." The doors closed and Usagi leaned back into his arms, looking up at him.

He should say something, push her away, but it felt so good to hold her like this, and he was sort of forgetting the reasons why he'd never done so in the past.

"I want to kiss you," she said, suddenly. Mamoru froze, and looked down at her in shock.

"You're drunk," he reminded her, putting his hands on her shoulders and she shrugged them off in annoyance, pulled on the labels of his jacket.

"Don't you wanna kiss me too?"

At the moment, Mamoru could think of nothing he'd ever wanted more in his entire life. "Yes but- I can't. We can't."

Usagi pouted a little. "But Mamoru," she whined a little.

The elevator stopped, the doors opened. They ignored it.

Usagi sighed sadly, "Tomorrow, I won't be brave enough to try." She ran her hands along his back, under his jacket, he didn't bother to stop her, leaning his head back against the wall.

The doors opened again and Usagi caught an advertisement hanging the doorway. She brightened. "Hey, Mamoru, I got it!"

"Hmm?"

"If we got married, we'd have to kiss," she said. "When they say 'you may now kiss the bride." Usagi looked at him with wide, serious eyes. "It's like the law or something."

Mamoru looked at her incredulously, his mouth dropping open a little. "Usagi," he said, pushing her back a little, "that's genius."

He pressed the button for the lobby.

The next morning

"Did you take care of it?" Minako asked, when they returned to the room.

"Not... exactly," Mamoru said.

"Why the HELL not? Chiba, I swear to God you better have a good reason why you are still married to Usagi or they will never find your body."

Mamoru glanced at Usagi, who was tucked protectively under Minako's arm. She looked at him timidly.

"There... was a delay," he said. "With processing the papers. We'll be annulled by dinnertime." Usagi smiled at him and he looked away.

"I have to go to work, I'm covering the fashion show today." Minako said, glancing between Usagi and Mamoru. "Can I fucking trust you two, or not?"

"Yes, totally," Usagi said, nodding. "We were just gonna get some food."

Minako shifted her suspicious gaze to Mamoru who nodded, too. "You can."

At that, all Minako could do was shake her head. Under her breath, she muttered to Mamoru, "You keep it in your pants, Chiba, married or not." She left after that, leaving Mamoru to alone to explain to Usagi why he suddenly was bright red and coughing.

Last night

In the cab ride, Usagi drunkenly leaned her head on his shoulder, "And when we are married," she said, giggling a little, "it won't matter that... that, um,... tomorrow we'll ... we won't go back to how we were," her words weren't making sense.

Mamoru clumsily stroked her hair.

"We- we can kiss any time we want," Usagi said, looking at Mamoru in the city lights.

"I know," he said, in awe.

"And," she leaned in closer, a mock-whisper, "we can do a lot more than just kiss."

"I think this might be the best idea you've ever had," he said, very seriously.

The next day

All day long Usagi acted like Mamoru's wife. She made him introduce them to strangers, and she learned to say, "We're newlyweds!" in adorably accented English at every turn. People offered to buy them drinks but the one thing neither of them did was touch a drop of alcohol.

She made him play craps, and blew on the dice in his hand. She kissed him on the cheek when he won. She made sure at all times to keep her arm around him, fingers laced through his as they walked along the strip. She made him buy her a (virgin) daiquiri in a giant drink container shaped like the Eiffel Tower. She made them ride on a gondola boat in "Venice".

She called him 'Mamo-chan' all day long. In turn, he called her 'Usako', which earned her approval and permission for him to stop calling her "my darling wife" every time he addressed her.

By the time five o'clock rolled around, Mamoru was actually sort of enjoying himself. But, it was getting time to head back to their hotel, gather the paperwork, and return to the chapel to... undo everything they'd done the night before.

"I have a confession," Usagi said, once the hotel room door closed behind them.

"Hmm?"

She kept her arm linked through his, fingers playing slowly with the fabric of his jacket. Mamoru focused on his breathing.

"I remember a little better now," she said. "And... you were right," she met his eyes and sighed. "Getting married... it was my idea." Usagi cringed and waited for his response.

Last Night

The ceremony was in English, but Mamoru prompted her as best he could, and Usagi just had to say her name, and "yes" at the right time. They had a little trouble getting the rings on each other's fingers, giggling all the while.

Usagi understood the word 'kiss' at least, and threw the plastic flowers they'd given her aside, and practically jumped in Mamoru's arms, kissing him smack on the mouth. He wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her up slightly, deepening the kiss until the officiant cleared his throat and he finally pulled away, not bothering to hide the smile on his face as the camera flash went off.

The next day

"I know," he said and her eyes flew open. "Something about how you wanted to kiss me legally or something."

She flushed. "You remembered!"

"Just that part," his brows knitted. And wanting to kiss you. Very, very badly.

Usagi's heart was starting to race. "Kiss me now," she said, suddenly.

Mamoru gave her a 'get real' look. "Usako-"

"We're married. We're sober. Just kiss me!" her eyes searched his. Drunk me thought marrying you would guarantee I'd be brave enough to do this in the sober light of day. Don't let her down.

"This is insane," he said, even as his hands found her waist, pulled her closer.

"You know what's insane? Pretending you don't like me when last night two Long Island Iced Teas had you reciting wedding vows!"

"I..." He tightened his hands around her, feeling almost as out of control as he had the night before. Only now there was no alcohol to blame, only her. Her being so close. "Usako... I-"

Oh, fuck it.

And he brought his lips crashing down on hers.

The night before

The camera flash was still behind Usagi's eyes in the cab ride back. "I still don't remember my room number," she mumbled.

"'Sok," he said, "I wrote mine down."

"So smart," Usagi said, sleepily.

He ended up helping her walk back to his room and setting her in the bed, before grabbing a pillow off the bed and falling asleep on the floor.

The next day

Mamoru tried to clear his mind, to focus on something other than kissing Usagi. There was something important they had to do, and it wasn't making out passionately in his hotel room. He was pretty sure.

"Usako..." he put his hands to her shoulders, pushed her away a little. "It's almost six, we have to hurry..."

"One more kiss, before I'm not your wife anymore," Usagi said, standing on her toes.

He was so very tempted, but he stood back and shook his head. "We have to go. Now."

Usagi nodded, feeling a little sad. He was so eager to take everything back.

She guessed she couldn't really blame him.

They made it there in time, and signing the papers was quick, and easy. "No money back," the owner said.

"Then we keep the rings," Mamoru said. Cheap as they were, at least it was some sort of memento.

"So," Usagi said at her naked ring finger as they walked back out the doors. "Guess that's over. It was fun while it lasted."

Mamoru slid his arms around her shoulders. "So, not-my-wife-anymore," he said. "What now?"

Usagi looked at up, confused. "What do you mean? It's over. We aren't married, you can go on with your life like last night never happened."

"Is that what you want?" He raised an eyebrow, quirked his lip.

"I kinda like last night," she said. "What I remember anyway." She flushed. "And... and I know I liked today."

"So then, let's go," Mamoru said, raising one hand to hail a taxi. He winked. "After all, it's Las Vegas. Anything can happen here."