Secrets & Tragedies
Pairings: Aaron Hotchner & Emily Prentiss
Spoilers: A/U Season 6, Spoiler up to and including "The Thirteenth Step"
Rating: T
Summary: After Prentiss finds out that a dangerous past is coming back to haunt her, tragedy strikes the BAU and some surprising secrets are revealed.
Really Long Winded Author's Note:
There has been so much talk on the internet about Paget Brewster leaving Criminal Minds as of Episode 6-18. I, for one, am keeping an open mind and trying not to guess. AJ Cook announced on Twitter that she was returning for Paget's final episode and it's entirely possible that it is.
But I'm trying to keep in mind that Paget Brewster and CBS Studios have not commented on whether she is actually leaving the show for good. As of January 14, 2011, the President of CBS said that she was hoping that Paget would stay with the show for Season Seven but that the choice was up to her.
You have to keep in mind that 6-18 would have been written and in pre-production by this time and regardless of any decisions made it would have been too late to change it and from everything that they cast is saying it's going to be a phenomenal episode, more than worthy send off for a much loved character and actress, if that is the route she goes.
Since she was only scheduled to appear in 17 Episodes this season in the first place it's possible that this will be a hiatus for the character and having her return in Season Seven (I doubt it, but denial is a lovely place). It is entirely possible that this is not the last of Emily Prentiss. That being said if she really is leaving, I can't say that I blame her after everything that happened last spring.
General consensus is that they are going to kill her off but I am hoping that CBS has enough brains not to piss off the 64000 people that signed the petition to save her job in the first place.
So my brain has started churning on how they are going to send her off. Rumors are ripe, including that they are going to kill her off, land her in a coma, or horrifically mangle her so that she can't be an agent anymore, and so on. It's been made worse by AJ Cook's guest appearance in the episode (but set photos of her are on the jet and that's usually at the beginning of an episode so for the funeral wouldn't be the only reason and remember, she works for the DOD now, international would go to them first). And besides that we still have three secrets to go and who knows if they will tie into that episode, I'm hoping for a confession from Hotch, to say... Rossi about a certain Brunette.
I haven't written and posted anything for the last eight years, since Stargate was in it's heyday (God do I feel old). But this was something that started to cook in my brain after watching "The Thirteenth Step" and I couldn't let it go. This story has already spawned and are in the works, a sequel and a prequel, although, I don't know where I will be going with either of those, if anywhere.
This story is a work of fiction by an amateur writer and is for entertainment purposes only. The writer is in no way associated with Criminal Minds or anyone connected to the program. No Copyright infringement is intended and no monetary compensation has been received by the creation of this story.
All publicly recognized characters and storylines are owned by The Mark Gordon Company ,Paramount/Viacom, Touchstone Television, CBS Television Studios, ABC Studios, and their related entities.
All original characters, settings and/or storylines are Copyright protected (Rev. Brandywyne L. Walker 2003 - 2011) Any duplication or distribution of this story, in whole or in part, expressly prohibited without written consent of the Author.
THE NEWS
Erin Strauss headed into the bullpen of the BAU unit, pushing open the glass doors and standing quietly off to the side, observing the room. This was a place that she wasn't comfortable and was never made to feel welcome. And on this day in particular she wished she was anyone else. That she didn't have to be the one to come see them.
Aaron Hotchner stepped out of his office and spotted her standing by the door and she knew she couldn't put it off any longer. Slowly, she made her way over to the man. Strauss watched his shoulders tense as he took in her appearance, his face tightened and in that moment she realized he knew. Likely not what she was there for specifically but that something was very wrong in their world.
"Aaron." His face hardened even more at the familiar address she never used with him, or any of her subordinate agents, save David Rossi. Strauss paused to collect herself; something she hadn't had to do in a long time. Regardless of what they all thought of her, this affected her too.
"Ma'am, can I help you?"
"I need to see your team in the conference room immediately."
Hotch's brow wrinkled at her tone of voice, her manner. All of it was passive and screamed submission. It was not how he was used to seeing her. In fact, he couldn't remember ever seeing her like this. He lifted his hand and caught Derek's attention, tipping his head to the conference room.
"Lead the way. Morgan will gather the others."
Once in the room with Strauss, he couldn't hold in his curiosity any longer and spoke out of turn. "Can you tell me what this is about?"
"Honestly, I would like to wait for the team. I only want to have to do this once."
All of the team filed in the room and took their usual places and looked up at Strauss who was at the front of the room, turned slightly away from them and doing her best to look as small as possible. For the first time since any of them had known her, she didn't look like the confident take charge woman they were used to dealing with. When she finally turned to face them her eyes stuck on Emily's empty chair and couldn't seem to will them away.
Believing that Strauss was annoyed at her absense, Hotch was quick to excuse his subordinates' lack of presence in the group, "Prentiss took a personal day today. She wanted to see her Mother before she left for the Middle East."
"Actually, Agent Prentiss is the reason I'm here." Instantly, the tension in the room mounted and the entire team went from slightly relaxed to battle ready in seconds, except for Aaron Hotchner. He seemed to sink in on himself as if he already knew what was coming.
"Approximately seven hours ago there was an accident on the I-95, just past the 611 turn off. Several vehicles were involved, including Agent Prentiss'. It appears as though she was trying to avoid the collision in front of her and lost control of her vehicle on a patch of ice. It rolled several times before coming to a stop in the ditch."
Strauss took a steadying breath. This was going to be the hard part.
"The paramedics arrived quickly and managed to pull her out of the car. She was in critical condition and they headed to the Hospital in Woodbridge. They got her to the hospital and into surgery, but…" Erin swallowed hard and for the first time allowed the team to see was she was feeling, the crushing sadness for a woman that she respected, even if she didn't get along with her at the best of times.
"She didn't make it. They lost her during surgery, her internal injuries too severe."
All that followed was silence. There was a mixture of stunned disbelief and total denial. The latter coming from Penelope Garcia who seemed to be looking for a way to ignore what she had just learned.
"No… She can't be. I talked to her last night. She was staying in the city. She would have had no reason to be heading here."
Strauss' tone softened, as it often did when she talked to the analyst. "Regardless, that is what happened. Agent Prentiss was so dedicated to her job that perhaps she was returning for a file she wanted while she was off, or needed to finish some last minute paper work. There are dozens of reasons she could have been coming here."
Garcia crumbled in on herself and vicious sobs racked her body. Morgan rushed over and knelt on the floor next to her, pulling her into his arms as she cried.
Hotch, who had been silent and as still as a statue through the whole thing sucked in a hard breath and then again before getting up and leaving the room in flurry of movment startling all of those present.
The team all watched as he rushed to his office, closing the door behind him and pulling the blinds. Confusion followed in his wake. While Aaron Hotchner was very reserved at the best of times, his team knew him and would never have begrudged him breaking down, not with them.
Erin turned back to the team, leaving Hotch's strange behavior for the others to work out. "I truly am so sorry for your loss. The Ambassador is planning a memorial for later in the week. She asked me to let you know that as soon as they have the details ironed out she will contact you all directly."
She wanted to stay with them. Say something further, but she wasn't a part of this team and knew that her presence wouldn't be welcome.
On her way out of the room she rested her hand on Rossi's shoulder and almost gasped at the emotion in the older man's eyes when he looked up at her. She couldn't remember the last time she had seen him so affected.
"Your team will be on stand down for the next two weeks. I'm sorry, I wish there was something else I could do."
And for the first time David Rossi believed every word that she said.
THE TEAM
Not a word was spoken by any of them.
Jennifer "JJ" Jareau leaned back against the bench seat of the table the team had sequestered for the evening. The silence around the table was suffocating but she couldn't make herself break it, each of them lost in their own thoughts of Supervisory Special Agent Emily Prentiss.
It was the CIRG's, which the BAU was a small part of, version of a funeral for Emily. It felt like there were hundreds of Agents from all of the teams crammed into the small Pub. The place was a favorite of the team and Emily in particular; it was their way of paying tribute to the vibrant woman who meant so much to them. JJ felt a small smile flicker across her lips as she listened to one of the stories being told by one of the agents at a nearby table.
Tomorrow would be the "funeral" that her mother had arranged and it made JJ want to lose her lunch. They all knew that it was going to be like and none of them wanted to attend but as much as Emily's life was political, so was theirs and pissing off an Ambassador was political suicide.
Rossi stood breaking into JJ's thoughts. "Does anyone want another?" He tipped his glass indicating he was heading for the bar. Some said yes, some no, and Rossi gave a small smile before turning away.
It was hard to sit there and look at the changes that this was making in her family. Each of them seemed less than they were at dinner last month and she missed the woman who should have filled the empty chair left in her honor.
Spence looked lost and confused, like her being gone permanently was something that he couldn't wrap is amazing mind around. Emily was his anchor and his mother, the one that never let him get away with anything and propped him up when he was struggling, all without saying a word. She let him vent when he was upset, smacked him down when he was being stupid and then hugged him when he calmed down and was embarrassed. She was the one that he went to when some nuance of social interaction was lost on him.
The new agent, Ashley Seaver, looked about the same as she did when JJ first met her but there was something more or perhaps it was less. She'd learned from Dave at dinner last month that Emily was the only reason the young agent was on the team. She had gone to Hotch and lobbied for her inclusion, JJ would have loved to have heard that conversation, and it was the teams respect for the brunette that caused them to take the young trainee into their fold. The young woman had lost a mentor, a friend, a protector and a potential older sister, much like she had been for JJ and Pen.
Derek was clinging to Pen in a way that she didn't think anyone had ever seen before. It was nothing to obvious, but it was there and they could see it in their friend. His eyes would follow her when she left his side and if Garcia spoke, he stopped whatever he was doing in favor of paying attention to his "baby girl".
Derek's entire focus was on the woman seated next to him and what JJ found more than shocking was the fact that Kevin seemed to understand the interaction between the two and didn't pay any attention to the growing closeness between them. He certainly didn't seem to be threatened by it and that to JJ spoke of the younger man's character. As for Derek, he was never more than a few feet away from her when they were out in the public eye and JJ knew that he had bunked on her couch at least a couple of nights in the last week. It was almost like he was afraid he would lose her too if he looked away from her for too long.
Pen was barely holding it together, her clothes where somber and totally lacking in color. She had forgone makeup, claiming there was no point as she was just going to cry and wipe it all off anyway. There had always been a small spark of adoration that Garcia had for Emily. She had once said to JJ that it was like Emily was larger than life and Pen got to stand in her radiance for a moment or two.
The worst came when someone at the bar had called her PG when they first arrived. Emily was the one that had first called her that and it hurt to hear the nickname that so many others had adopted. Garcia had covered her mouth to hold in a sob and then ran into the bathroom, not coming out till Hotch went in and got her. She didn't know what the stoic man had said but it was enough to get her to come back to the table.
Dave was the one that seemed the least effected, but only seemed that way. JJ assumed that it was because he had lost so many people over the years. Although, she knew that there was a special bond between the two of them. Emily was his champion when he first arrived, the first to notice when he was having trouble and the first to suggest they help him. For his part, Dave was her confidante, the keeper of secrets she didn't share with the others, even with JJ herself. There was a sadness in his eyes that there hadn't been before and she knew it was affecting him, the same as it was the others, regardless of how he tried to hide it.
Hotch just looked dead inside. There was none of the cold fire in his eyes, the determination she had come to expect from him. Instead of the pain she expected to see from losing a friend and colleague there was nothing. No anger, no pain, no sadness, just a cold dead mask in the place of a once passionate, if taciturn man.
Aaron Hotchner had been the one to show up in her office at the DOD and she knew that whatever it what he was going to say would destroy her. JJ had just lost her best friend, her only link to the woman that she was when she worked at the BAU, the girl that would go out shopping and talk about boys and tease her "older sister". Her relationship with Pen was still intact but it wasn't the same as the one that she shared with Emily. There was a gapping whole in her soul that used to be filled with a loving and viberant woman's presence. It could never be filled now that her friend was gone. There was a large part of JJ that wanted to rage against the universe, destroy everything in her path, all for the loss of her best friend, but it was an accident and there was no one to blame for what she was feeling now.
Hotch had held her as she sobbed useless tears of loss and promised her that she wouldn't be alone, she still had the team; then he had taken her back to the BAU, where she was surrounded by her family. By the time they arrive he had shut down completely and this mask was in the place of her mentor and friend; she hadn't seen the real him since. The only crack in his armor was Jack.
She was really the only person Hotch was close to that understood the trouble he was having with what to say to the young boy. The team all knew that Jack believed that Emily was away on a trip and were very careful in his presence to let nothing slip but the boy could tell that something wasn't right.
It was a quick temporary fix until Hotch could figure out what to say to his son. They all knew of his fears about what to tell Jack. About how he would explain that he had lost another woman he loved, so afraid it was an emotional trauma that the empathetic child would not recover from. For the first four years of his life the team had kept their distance from the boy but that all changed with Haley's death. He knew each of them, they helped to care for him, and none more so than Emily Prentiss.
The team as she knew it, as she remembered it was no more. This had changed them in a way that no one could have predicted or seen coming. Emily Prentiss was too much to all of them, something that could never be duplicated or replaced and now that something was gone.
And still there was only silence around the table.
THE YOUNGEST
Hotch leaned his head back against the couch and once again tried to make himself go to bed. To face the suffocating loneliness that would follow in his dreams. One of the floorboards creaked, causing him to turn his head and look over at Jack who was hovering at the edge of the couch, clutching a small stuffed bear to his chest and chewing on the tips of his fingers. A habit that had started after his mother's death and was his way of coping when he felt stressed.
"Hey buddy, you should be sleeping." The young Hotchner crawled over the arm and sprawled himself in his father's lap.
"Why are you so sad?" Hotch looked into his son's eyes and felt horribly guilty for the worry he saw in their depths.
Time was passing and he knew he was finally going to have to talk to his son about Emily. It was a conversation he was dreading and had been avoiding for the last week, still undecided if he should tell him the truth or make something up to make it all easier.
"Emily's gone and I miss her very much."
"Yeah, but she'll be back right?" The question was decisive, as if there was no question about her coming back to them.
Aaron briefly closed his eyes before turning his son so he was facing him head on. It was time to make a decision.
"I don't know when she'll be back."
Jack's brow scrunched up a way that was so reminiscent of his father that it made Hotch's lips twitch. Jack wasn't used to his father not having the answers. "Why? Where'd she go?"
"You know how Dad goes and finds the bad guys right?" Jack nodded his head and perked up a bit. This was a topic he liked even if his Dad didn't really tell him much.
"Well, there's this bad guy out there right now and he's far away from here. Emily's gone to try and catch him. But because he's so far away she could be gone a long time."
"Why didn't you go with her?" It was the logic of a child not understanding why his father just didn't go and make it all better. It was crushing that he would have to once again learn that his father just couldn't fix everything.
"I had to stay here with you and it's going to be longer than just a few days."
"But I like Em'ly. I don't want her to be gone. She makes cookies with me and stuff."
Hotch smiled softly at the memory. It was one of the best that he had in recent memory. He had been scheduled for a late meeting with Strauss and Jess couldn't pick Jack up from school. Without prompting, Emily offered to pick the boy up and stay with him until Hotch made it home.
Aaron had happily agreed and, with the promise to pick up dinner on the way home as a thank you, watched as Emily rush out the door to pick up his son.
He arrived home that night with pizza to the sound of laughter ringing through the apartment. Something he hadn't heard in a long time.
Moving silently through the apartment Aaron leaned against the doorway to the kitchen and took in the scene before him. The room was covered in flour, not to mention the woman and child before him. They had their heads pressed together and were inspecting their wares, giggling softly. When they looked up and saw him standing there they looked both embarrassed and so proud of what they had done that he actually laughed at the sight of the two of them, snapping a photo with his phone. One that to this day he kept there, where he could remember them both smiling and happy.
Needless to say, that night he discovered that Emily was a terrible cook. The cookies were awful. Too much salt and hard as a rock but Jack looked so happy at that moment that he choked it back and congratulated them both. Emily looked so embarrassed over the state of his kitchen that he wanted to wrap her in his arms and keep her with him forever. To enjoy the simple joy and innocence that Emily never lost, even with the nature of their work.
"I don't want her to be gone either."
Laughing, she pushed then both out of the kitchen, telling Father to go and clean up his Son and proceeded to clean up the kitchen. That night was one of the happiest he could remember since Jack was born and after that Emily became a fixture in their home and in both of their lives, silently providing companionship to both father and son that they had both been missing up till that point.
The team was going to think he was underhanded for lying to his son but he had already lost his mother. To lose Emily now would be a blow that the young boy was just not ready to deal with. Emily played with him and taught him things, like baking god awful cookies from scratch. They were all things that Aaron just wasn't equipped to deal with.
It wasn't all that long ago that he had to take time off work to help his son, who had finally grasped the finality of his Mother's death. To loose Emily in the same fashion so soon was too much and he couldn't do that to him.
"Who's gonna finger paint with me?" Jack looked so depressed and in typical child fashion had moved onto what, in his mind, was the most pressing issue, helped to convince Aaron that he had made the right choice.
"I don't know buddy but we'll work something out."
THE FUNERAL
Aaron stood at the edge of the room, removed from the "mourners" and looked around at the people milling about. The team huddled together in a distant corner, separate and isolated, and he knew that was where he should be. But the selfish part of him didn't want to listen to the platitudes being bandied about. He seriously needed a minute to gather his thoughts and pull his infamous iron control back around him. To put on the mask he needed to wear till this farce was over.
He closed his eyes and sighed, he was just so tired. The last week had been hell and it wasn't over yet. He still had to get through the rest of the night before he could rest, if he could even find peace then.
Somehow the team had all managed at one point or another to invade his small apartment. They seemed to know how hard this was for their taciturn leader even if they didn't know why.
With as much time as they spent at the apartment, he made them promise not to talk about her death in front of Jack. It was just one more trauma he didn't need and Aaron wouldn't put him through it, not this time, Jack loved her that much and he would be crushed.
There was always one of them there, keeping him company, trying to help him forget. In the last five years he had lost so many people. In one way or another, Elle, Gideon, Kate, Haley and even JJ, after a fashion, had been lost to him. It was almost like they were waiting to see if this would be his breaking point.
They had no idea.
His eyes flashed over to the overly loud and artificial laugh of one of the Ambassador's many lackeys. This was a total mockery of everything that Emily was and believed in. It was more like a political fundraiser than a funeral and he wanted to snort at how ludicrous it all was.
The people who got up to talk about Emily were people that she either didn't like or didn't really know. Although, her mother had asked him to speak on behalf of the team, he couldn't find the words. Nothing that could sum up who she was or what she meant to all of them, everything that he tried to write felt artifical and contrived. Dave ended up doing it and it was the only time that someone spoke of her like she was a person, someone loved, someone missed.
He should have known that the Ambassador would use it for the strongest political advantage.
He felt the band tightening around his chest again. She would have hated this.
THE SECRETS
Aaron pulled up to the side of the airport hangar and parked his car. He tried to force himself to get out and walk into the building but the last few days had already been so hard, with the funeral this afternoon, with the team, and he wasn't ready for this. It was too soon.
He heaved a deep sigh and got out of his car, this wasn't something that he could put off any longer. He walked over and pulled the door open, stepping inside. Hotch blinked several times as he waited for eyes to adjust to the brighter lights. He looked about and took in the hangar with the small plane near the bay doors at the front and multitude cases lying about the floor, all prepared for loading into the plane.
Sean McAllister had been watching Aaron since he came in the door. The man truly looked like the weight of the world rested on his shoulders. In the months he had known the man he had learned that he was not overly demonstrative or prone to showing any emotion most of the time, he seemed smaller at the moment. It was a feeling Sean could understand in some small part. Hearing a sound from the plane, Sean turned his head and spotted Emily Prentiss at the edge of the ramp. She stood there and stared, seeming unable to move, for several seconds, having not seen Hotch in over a week.
Then she started to move, at a dead run from one end of the hangar to the other, she headed for Aaron Hotchner, who looked for a moment like he was going to break.
Sean put down the cases he was moving into the plane and headed for the office. This conversation didn't need any witnesses.
Emily all but flung herself at Hotch, tears already running down her face. He wrapped his arms around her and clung to her smaller frame, feeling the moisture of her tears on his neck, he could feel his own eyes start to water.
"It's too soon. This isn't what we planned." Aaron said in a choked voice.
Emily's head bobbed against his neck but her voice was clear and strong when she finally spoke. "I know and I'm so sorry."
Hotch pulled away from her and cupped her face in his strong hands. "I'm not ready."
She took a deep breath and willed herself to stop crying, "I'm not either but this is the best chance we'll have."
A sad, soft smile played on the edge of his lips. "I just found you Emily and to lose you now…" His voice trailed off, before clearing his throat and trying to talk again. "This wasn't supposed to happen for at least a couple of months."
"It wasn't my first choice either but this was too perfect. There were so many witnesses, police reports, medical reports. We couldn't have planned anything this perfect. The only people besides you and Sean that know I'm still alive are the medical team at Potomac Hospital in Woodbridge and they understand what's at risk here."
Hotch nodded his head before leaning forward and pressing a soft kiss to her lips, willing his hands to stop shaking. The tightness in his chest making it hard for him to breath, he wanted more time. This wasn't fair, just a little more time with her was all he asked and now he had to let her go even sooner than they had anticipated.
She blew a breath out between her pursed lips and broached a subject she was reluctant to talk about. "What did you tell Jack?"
"I told him the truth." Emily could see the way Aaron's jaw tightened, as if willing her to argue with him about the matter.
Rather than the protracted fight he was expecting she simply closed her eyes and sighed out his name, "Aaron..."
"I couldn't do it Emily. I couldn't tell him you were dead." His voice caught on the last word, testifying as to how hard it was to think, let alone say, "I don't think he could have handled it, losing another woman he loves that way. I couldn't force myself to hurt him like that, especially since it wasn't true." He smiled softly to her, willing her to see his point of view. "Now he just thinks you're another superhero going off to fight the bad guys."
"What if someone finds out? What if he slips to the team?" He could see the argument in her eyes but knew that intrinsically, deep down, she knew he was right.
"The team thinks that I'm simply protecting him from the loss of another woman he loves. They don't necessarily agree with it but they understand."
She closed her eyes and wished with everything that she had that things were different than they were. Her team was her family and how this had to be hurting them.
Opening her eyes again she could feel the rush of tears she had been holding at bay coming back to the surface. "How are they?" Her voice was choked and soft.
"They're coping..." Aaron closed his eyes briefly and let out a soft sigh before continuing, "It's going to be hard without you, you mean so much to each of them. Derek, I think, is taking it the worst. He hasn't left Garcia's side since we were told. I honestly think the two of you are his only real friends and with you gone, it's like he's afraid she's going to disappear too."
She had been afraid of that. Over the last year he had become even more closed off from everyone. He seemed to have lost direction and with it his connection to most of the people that he knew. She had known that this was going to hurt him in ways that it didn't for the others, at least on the surface. She couldn't even force herself to think about what this was doing to Aaron. This wasn't fair to him and if she had been stronger she would have pulled away to save him from this kind of pain.
"Promise me you'll keep an eye on Reid too. There's something going on with him, he's not ready to talk about it yet and when he is he won't ask for help if he's struggling. Especially from you, you'll have to pull it out of him but…"
"I promise. I'll take care of Reid… and the others. I won't pull away from them. I don't think they would let me even if I tried." Aaron reach up a hand and scratched the hair at the back of his neck, giving her and self-deprecating grin. "They haven't really left me alone since it happened but after a little time passes I'll have a few fences to mend. I didn't react well when Strauss told us about the accident."
"I'm so sorry for that. I would have found a way to tell you but I didn't wake up till hours after the fact and by then it was done."
"I know, but I was in such a hurry to call Sean that I just ran out of the room and then I didn't come back for several hours, until after I told JJ. I didn't want them to see the relief on my face that it wasn't real." Aaron reached out and cupped the soft porcelain of her cheek, brushing one of the tear tracks from her face. She nuzzled her face into his palm, clutching his jacket in her small fists.
A sob broke loose from his chest. He wasn't going to have this anymore. She was going to get on a plane and he didn't know where she was going to be in 24 hours or when he was going to see her again, if he was going to see her again. He was under no delusions about what Emily was facing. He knew exactly how dangerous this was and that there was a chance she might never be coming back.
Understanding the look in his eyes, her hand slid up his chest, pressing the ring that lay hidden under his shirt into his skin. The ring that had been there for almost a month now, hidden from view but not from each other. A soft smile lit up her eyes and his matched it because this was real and they had a tangible reminder of that fact. They would be apart for an unknown period of time but this link between them would mean that they were never alone.
Sean came out of the office with an apology on his face. "Emily, it's time to go."
She turned her head and nodded before facing Aaron again and his voice was hoarse when he finally spoke. "Where will you go?"
"I'm going to meet up with a couple of old teammates in Germany. We'll start there, and hopefully we'll find him soon." There was a hope in her voice that didn't reach her eyes because both of them knew it wouldn't be that simple.
A frown slipped over his features that what she didn't say. "Sean isn't going with you?" He had come to know the man over the last couple of months and trusted him to watch over Emily when he couldn't be there to do it himself.
"No, he's going to stay here in Washington. He'll be in the public eye and the most likely target, keeping Doyel's eyes off of us. Try and draw him out that way." She took a deep breath, not happy with the decision but couldn't argue with the logic. "I tried to talk him into leaving with me but he thinks it best to try and get him on multiple fronts. With my diplomatic knowledge and linguistic skills, I'm the best choice for this."
Hotch jerked violently when the hangar doors started to open and knew he was running out of time. He could feel the panic welling up inside of him and logic flew out the window in the face of his distress. "I could retire, take a leave of absence, something, and meet up with you there."
"You can't, we both knew that going into this." Emily nearly broke at the pain in his eyes. "I love you Hotch, so very much… but you have to stay here with Jack."
She laced her fingers through his and squeezed, willing him to understand, to remember all of the things that they had discussed back when this plan was first being formed. "I need you both to be as far away from me as possible, to know that you are both safe. He'll destroy everything in his path to get to me and the others. If he thinks I'm dead, you'll all be safe and it's the best chance we've got of someone getting behind him and stopping him for good."
His eyes welled with tears as he looked down at her and his iron control finally broken and he allowed them to slip down his face. "I love you Emily. Swear to me, swear it, that you'll come back. That you will fight, that you will win and that you will come back to me."
Emily closed her eyes tight as Hotch rested his forehead against hers. Standing there, inches apart, fingers laced together, she would have given anything to simply stay in that moment in time. She knew this was going to be hard, they both did, but what he was asking… to make that promise, knowing that she might not be able to keep it. That there was a good chance she couldn't keep it...
"Promise me!" His whisper was harsh and almost not heard over the sound of the jet's engines starting behind them.
She would give him anything, anything that would make this easier for him. "I promise."
Aaron lifted her left hand to his lips and kissed the rings adorning her fingers. "You have something to fight for. You have a husband and son now. You have to come back to us."
"I love you and I'm so sorry that this is happening to you again."
Hotch dropped her hands and pulled her roughly to him. One arm banded around her waist, jerking her tight to his body, the other tangled in her hair angling her face up to his.
Pulling her closer to him, he whispered against her lips, "Not sorry. I'll never be sorry."
His lips caught hers and captured her sob as it was leaving her mouth. Emily's hands slid up his shoulders and tangled in his hair. Matching his kiss with an intensity that was violent, shocking and said everything they didn't have time to put into words.
After long moments Emily finally pulled away, running for the plane and up inside, not looking back at the man standing behind her. Afraid that if she slowed for even a second that she would rush back to him and never leave.
Taking her seat as the hatch closed with a finality that terrified her, she twisted the rings on her finger, allowing their presence to calm and sooth her. Their marriage was everything they were not. It was rash, not planned out and a total impulse on both their parts but no less true for the speed at which it happened.
Over the last two months she came to realize that this is where she would have been regardless; but things being what they were, it sped up the process. She couldn't find a single regret, save for the pain that her husband now had to endure. Aaron Hotchner was essentially a widower twice in his lifetime and now had a horrible secret that he couldn't share with anyone.
She looked out the window as the plane tipped sideways and looked down at the lights as they grew smaller and smaller, taking her farther away from the man she loved. Emily had no way of knowing what the future would hold, if she would even make it back or if Aaron would actually be a widower again. But in that moment of silence, looking down on the lights of the city, she vowed that she would do everything she could to make it back to him, whole and alive.
Their marriage, while hasty, gave her what it was intended to. It gave her a tangible reminder of what she was leaving behind. It gave her something to fight for, something to come home to.
Aaron stood with Sean at the hanger door and watched the plane taking his wife away from him, disappearing into the night sky and tried not to give into the fear that he would never see her again.
The man next to him seemed to sense his thoughts and turned to him with an honest smile and hope in his eyes that could not be faked. "You'll see her again. I'm sure of it. If there's anyone out there that can get that bastard, it's the three of them."
"I hope you're right." Aaron reached out and shook the hand of one of the few people he considered a friend, all because of one special woman. "Will you keep me informed of anything you find out?"
Sean tipped his head and spoke with his soft Scottish brogue, "Of course, I think you will be seeing much of me over the next while." He turned away from the Agent and headed for his own car leaving Aaron standing where he was, under the light on the side of the building.
Aaron didn't know how long he stood there before turning away from the black sky. Long ago he lost sight of the lights on the plane but still he couldn't pull himself away. For the first time since he was a young boy he prayed.
He prayed for his team, that they would make it out of this relatively unscathed and that they would forgive him for keeping all of this a secret from them when the truth finally came out.
He prayed for Sean McAllister, his new friend. He knew that Sean was in even greater danger than even his wife was. He fervently hoped that when this was all said and done that both of them would survive.
He prayed for Jack, that he would adjust to life without the constant presence that Emily had been since his mother passed away. Especially with how close they had grown since he found out about Sean and the man that was hunting them both.
But mostly he prayed for the life of his new wife, the woman he loved, more than he thought he was capable of loving another person. Prayed that she would return to him, sooner rather than later.
Turning to his own car, he got in and started it up. Aaron Hotchner pulled away from the small airport and headed back to the city and his son. Vowing to do the best he could to return to life, keep his promises to Emily and wait patiently for her return.
THE END
TBC in Secrets 3 - Changes & Reunions
All comments are welcome but keep in mind I don't have anyone editing my work and I haven't shared a completed work online in eons, any errors found are mine and mine alone. Enjoy, and in about four weeks, we'll see how far off I am.
